A/N: Just for fun, here's an accompaniment to LOMG, which would take place somewhere between chapters 10 and 11.

I really, really hate it here.

No, you don't understand. Like, I REALLY hate it here. But here I sit, on my futon, staring out the window.

Why am I in 'my' room (dad's girlfriend's spare/crafts/dump all her extra crap room) all by myself, you might ask?

This family is psychotic.

Like, I knew my mom was psychotic after the whole 'attacking her only son' fiasco. That's why I left. But I think I've gone from bad to worse. Much, much worse.

She is watching me.

Sue, with her huge green eyes and bone-straight blondeish reddish hair and her pink cargo pants and flip flops. Who the hell wears pink cargo pants? Not me.

Well obviously. I would look like a tool.

I had homework spread out in front of me. By homework I mean last week's law notes. I'm not actually doing anything. I don't have homework. I just want to look busy so that she stops watching me through the keyhole.

I. Am. So. Close. To. Snapping.

I heard her sigh. Loudly.

Feverishly, I grabbed my phone from where it sat beside me on. I slid it open. I selected an unlikely contact.

Kai, Kai. Save me. Kaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiii.

In addition to sending telepathic messages I sent him an actual, textual one.

"Kai. My sister is stalking me. Help."

I heard her sigh again when I put my phone down. Stop sighing, Sue. What do you have to sigh about, anyway? You are in the prime of your youth. You're like, twelve or something. Actually I think dad said she was fourteen. My phone vibrated.

All Kai said was "incest, lol."

I fucking HATE him.

I bet he wasn't even laughing out loud! He never laughs.

Except when Tyson says something retarded. Oh, I could text Tyson. Or Ray. But what exactly am I expecting from them, anyway? What are they going to do, come here and tackle her?

I replied to Kai's message with a crying face. He replied back with a smile. Bastard.

She just sighed again. I think I twitched.

My breathing sounded unnaturally loud to me. Just knowing that she was watching and listening made my skin crawl. I heard a shuffle. Was she leaving? No, just shifting positions outside the keyhole.

I heard footsteps. Sue's mom walked by without saying anything.

What kind of family is this?

I texted Kai. "Her mom thinks it is quite normal and okay."

While I waited for a reply, I heard more footsteps. That had to be dad. It was, I heard him say, "Morning, Sue."

She said, "Morning, daddy."

It took all my strength not to gag. Visibly, anyway.

Wait, my dad thinks this is okay too?

Kai replied, "nothing wrong with some healthy stalking."

I texted, "my dad thinks it's cool too."

Kai replied again, instantly. I had a sudden mental image of him, sitting in his bedroom, staring at his phone. I bet that's not what he's doing. I bet he's doing homework, or chilling with Tala, or hooking up with-

His reply said, "that bitch. ughhh im bored" That's too bad. Oh, he just called my dad a bitch.

I smiled.

My mind was buzzing in a pleasant 'Kai wants to text me' kind of way. I smiled again. Or continued to smile, or smiled wider, who the hell cares?

And then she sighed one more time, theatrically.

"Kai, I want to go home."

I really did. It's a sign of how messed up this family is that I actually prefer physical abuse over this mental trauma.

Kai replied again. He must really have nothing else to do.

"get used to it, we stare cause youre gorgeous."

We? As in, he and my stalker?

Together? Outside my keyhole?

Okay, I took that one too far. The image of that made me laugh.

Wait, so he stares at me?