Frank P. Stunlock woke up in a room he wasn't familiar with. the walls were lined with video game posters. Once he was done staring at Kasumi and Ayane's very large… eyes, he cautiously made his way downstairs. He found his way to a large room that seemingly contained every video game and console under the land's five suns. In the middle of it was a couch, and upon that couch was a woman wearing a yellow pikachu beret on red hair, looking and waving at him.
"Heeeeey, buddy-banzai!" said she, boisterously. "Name's Joanie Chanco, what's yours?"
"Frank. Frank P. Stunlock." said Frank, nervously. "How have I happened upon the here and now?"
Joanie replied, "Well, I drugged ya. Don't remember? They were fruit-flavored."
Frank reminisced, "That's right. I despise cranberry… Well, Joanie, I have business. I'll be taking my leave…" Frank headed to the exit, only to be stopped by a soft, yet firm rope joanie had thrown around his neck.
"This presents a problem." he responded.
Joanie wore an expression of disappointment. "Aw, c'mom, let's play some games! it'll be fun! I've got quite a lot."
"Oh, alright." Frank said with a sigh. He turned around, and the rope fell off. Joanie let out a short, but enthused "yay."
Frank looked at the multitude of games. he pulled out a game called Tetris the Movie Starring Sonic. Frank had never seen a game that didn't use punctuation before. "What's this?" said he. Joanie replied, "Oh, that one's a classic. It has the best story of either franchise, I.M.O." A red flag that she probably hadn't read the comics.(Author's Note: Seriously, the Tetris comics are awesome.)
They put the disk into the Wiistationbox 7 and played it. Frank went into options and turned anti-chunkation on, then pressed start. The game opened with an cutscene showing a silhouette of a mysterious, shady council talking about how they want to invade earth. Suddenly, the light turned on, and the council members were tetris blocks! "Shyamalan twist!" said Frank.
Then there was another cutscene, that showed giant tetris blocks falling towards earth, Poland to be exact.
"L-piece is my waifu." said Joanie.
"no, he's mine, you can't have him!" replied Frank.
The cutscene continued to show the polish people panicing. a heroic man stood and shouted "you can't stop me, geometric fiends! For I am Oong, the last tetris-bender!" Frank commented, "So, is he, like, the last guy to get drunk off tetris?"
It was then that the gameplay started. It was a normal tetris game, during which Joanie and Frank had a normal conversation about cat volcanoes. when frank completed it, there was another cutscene, showing sonic the hedgehog running down a hallway, apparently on a Tetrissian Battleship, smoking a cigarette and holding a baseball bat.
Sonic pulled out a phone and said, "Agent Oong, what's the situation in poland?"
Oong replied, "it's a little toasty… with extra cheese."
"Oh crap. keep on the bending, private!" Sonic looked at the baseball bat in his hands. "Dammit! Magic bat's running low on America Power. Only got enough for a few more shots."
"Shots?" questioned Frank.
"You'll see." said Joanie.
The gameplay started again, only this time it seemed to be a third-person shooter with sonic as the player character. The reticle was there, but sonic had no gun. Frank pressed the middle trigger, and sonic used his "magic bat" to fire a Bleach-style sword beam, only the beam was colored white and red in the pattern of a baseball. "That's unoriginal." said frank. Joanie replied, "Be careful, 'cause that uses up America Power. You can tap the J6 button to do a melee attack that doesn't." "thanks for the tip." said Frank.
Frank and Joanie heard sirens in the distance. Joanie said, "Crap, you may wanna save your progress." Frank went to the pause menu and did just that. Joanie handed him a paper. "This is my contact information. My phone number, email, mugtome, twüter, and popchat. Don't get the wrong idea, though: you can't compare to my S.O. There are two motorcycles in the garage, consider one yours, and escape, quickly!" she said. The police sirens were getting closer, and Joanie was frantically packing suitcases. Frank did as she told him, and got the hell outta there. To Probably Not Be Continued...