"What...what exactly is it that you...that you want to do to me then, Bob?"
The words were delivered with an equal mix of morbid curiosity and nervous terror.
Bob closed his eyes, head still buried in his hands and breathed deeply to calm himself. What kind of question was that? After One Two's reaction to Bobs previous confession it was clear he didn't really want to know. Bob knew he shouldn't answer, should just tell his mate to forget it, drive them to the party and let this whole thing be forgotten in a haze of drink and drugs. Almost the send off One Two had planned. That's what he knew he should do. Certainly not answer a question as open ended and risky as 'What do you want to do to me?'
God help him, what didn't he want to do?
Then again, he had survived this far, and he was going to prison tomorrow, in for a penny, in for a pound as they say. Still he couldn't help the touch of sarcasm that edged his words, amazed and slightly annoyed that his friend was still poking at this subject. Hadn't this been hard enough already?
"What do I want to do? What do you bloody think? I wana do the horizontal bloody mambo with you One Two"
He glanced sideways at the Scotsman's face seeing the expected disgust in a grimace that his friend was at least kind enough to try to hide, forcing an uneasy smile to cover it. Surprisingly there was also an understanding there, a resignation showing that he had known that would be the answer and been prepared for it. Finally, there was a look of resolve.
"Would you settle for the regular mambo?"
Bob blinked in surprise, unsure what was being offered, if anything.
"What?"
"You know" The older man urged him, doing a little wiggle mime in his seat to emphasise the words "Dancing"
Bob could have laughed if his throat wasn't clenching so hard "Dancing? You wana take me dancing?"
There was a brief flash of hesitation on One Two's face and Bob almost regretted the question. Maybe 'want' was too strong a word.
"I promised you a good last night." One Two told him softly. Voice calm and sincere. "I can't offer you everything you want Bob. I just can't. But if you want it I can offer you this"
The young Englishman felt tears welling up in his eyes and forced them down, determined not to fall any further in his friend's eyes than he already had.
Bob wasn't any good at dancing, but One Two enjoyed it. Always looked like he was having fun with whatever girl had taken his fancy that night as Bob watched on from the side-lines, wondering what it might be like to be the one out there with the handsome Scott, bodies pressed close, moving to the music. Tonight, he had the chance to find out, if he wanted.
It was more than he had expected. More than he had ever dared hope.
One Two sat there quietly waiting for his answer, face still looking nervous but determined.
"Yeah ok" Bob nodded, finally sitting up straight and taking another calming breath to steady himself, thankful that this time it worked "Let's go dancing"