This is my first attempt at fan fiction, so all feedback is very welcome. The story takes place six years after the beginning of the series, making the rookie-nine eighteen. Yeah, and I stole the title off a Engrish dot com T-shirt.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, and this is not a Mary Sue fic. Seriously.
Chapter 1: Tegata - Prologue
The three sand-nins in the corner were talking about him. The girl was a little tipsy, and the podgy one in the ridiculous jumpsuit was getting worked up trying to dissuade her of something. The autistic red-headed kid with the giant bottle strapped to his back simply stared at him, not even trying to hide it.
Tegata raised his glass and smiled across the room. The kid looked away. Two minutes later the girl was looking him in the eye, standing by his stool with her hand on her hip.
"Hi." She said and smiled.
"Hi." Tegata said.
She was a looker, all right. Blonde hair everywhere, fishnets, cleavage. No doubt intended to distract male opponents. In her eyes he saw, behind the alcohol, intelligence and a little arrogance.
"Wanna make out?" she asked, slurring slightly. He didn't expect her to be that blunt, but he was too drunk to show any surprise. He downed his drink.
"How old are you, darling?" he asked.
"I'm twenty-one and I'm not your darling, darling." She never even blinked. He appreciated her not pulling the old "You're not supposed to ask a lady that"-crap.
"Well I'm forty-three."
Her jaw dropped.
"So although I appreciate the interest, I suggest you go find some nice boys your own age to make out with. Shouldn't be too hard."
She walked away mumbling something about his t-shirt. He ordered another. No point being sober when talking to his brother tonight, his brother being dead and all.