Phantom

by KiwiCave

Imagine Earth without STAR WARS. Shocking - I know and it seems bleak. But on that precise Earth my "Rey" lives, as she suddenly shares visions with the unknown "Kyren". He tells her that he does not even live on Earth, but on a ship far off in space, that she is able to use the Force and that he needs her help to reestablish balance between the Light and the Darkness.

Phantom

1.

The empty feeling pulled her down into the depth. Deeper and deeper and almost drowned her, even though she could still breathe. It had its firm grip on her, cornered her and made her heart freeze into sharp, piercing crystals. More and more it enclosed her in, until it felt hard to even take a step. She obeyed and stopped, being shaken and stabbed.

Suspiciously she looked around, wanted to make sure that nobody had seen her and luckily the path was empty. Relieved, that she did not have to show herself like that to anyone, yet disappointed, that there was no one, who may have rescued her from her numbness.

She forced herself to put one foot in front of the other and walking felt unexpectedly easy, even though it hurt. Walk on, walk on, even though she did not want to arrive.

She reached a turn, swaying, her sight blurred, but no tears came. She had no strength for that.

Lost in thoughts, she gave a start, as someone stood there yet, just behind the corner. Instantly she lowered her hands, of which she only now noticed that she had held them clutched to her chest, as if for protection. Also she tried for a friendly, neutral expression, wondering how blind someone had to be, not to realise how bad she felt. But probably no one cared. Or they actually could not see it.

The young man stared at her, glowering, his gaze filled with anger and hatred. He did not even try to hide it and his whole body became tense as she stepped closer. His hair was black, as were his gloves, the thin sweater he wore, the trousers and the boots covering them.

"What are you doing here?", he shouted and took a threatening step towards her.

Startled of his tone, she halted, trying to gather her thoughts.

"Well, I'm going for a walk", she replied as calmly as she could, without getting rude herself.

"What is that about? A walk? What are you doing here?", he raged and bent down a bit, as if getting into a lurking position, ready to launch an attack, when she saw that, panting, his chest rose and lowered rapidly. He must have been running or raging.

"I'm not doing anything. Just walking down this path", she indicated the rocky road.

"Are you trying to make fun of me?", he screamed and forcefully stepped closer. "There is no path! What are you doing here in my rooms?"

He built himself up to full height a few feet before her, seemed to grow and started to frighten her.

Now it was up to her to get angry and she harshly answered: "I'm not inside your rooms! This is a forest", she revolved her arm through the air to point out the trees.

What was wrong with this guy? Could he be mad?

He looked around him, taking in the sky above and the thicket to his left and right. Then he turned to her again, growling.

"We are not in a forest. These are my rooms and you penetrated here! How did you do that? What is it that you want?"

She decided to no longer engage in the conversation and walked down the path shaking her head, intending to pass that young man with some distance between them.

"We're in a forest, got it? And there, everybody's allowed to walk freely as they may", she hissed, as she reached him, wanted to leave him standing there.

But then he swung round and grabbed her arm. She felt his touch, as the young man suddenly disappeared. He turned into thin air, as if he had never been.

Startled and as if being paralysed she turned from one side to the other, searching for him, yet the phantom had vanished.

Afraid of getting mad now herself, she began to tremble and quickened her pace, heading for home.

2.

This time there were tears. Unceasingly they fell into her lap, dampening the fabric of her trousers, which looked as if speckled. The helplessness shook her, did not let her go, while she wished for nothing, but to leave all this behind. To leave for anywhere, no matter where. As long as she could escape. Escape that pain!

Sniffing she tried desperately to wipe the tears off her face. They burned on her skin and in her throat.

Out of the corner of her eye she spotted him and swung round on her chair.

"You!", she yelled panting, as the shock ran through her body and she could only just hold herself back from screaming out.

He stood in the centre of the room, again clad in black and again gasping for breath. With a frown he looked at her, yet not as darkly as last time. She had succeeded in convincing herself that she had imagined him, that he did not exist. However now he had appeared again.

"You again!", he spoke grumbling, straightened up and peered around, as if on the lookout for someone. Then he directed his attention back to her. "What is this all about? How did you disappear out of my rooms the other day? And how did you get here now? No one is supposed to enter this place!"

She tried to calm down, scrutinizing him warily.

"I haven't been inside you rooms", she persisted, trying not to let her voice shake and to suppress her sorrow, "yet now, you're in mine. What's happening?"

His unexpected appearance scared her.

Still he looked fierce, nonetheless his eyes became softer all of a sudden.

"You have cried", he murmured, "just like last time."

So he had noticed.

"And you've been raging again, haven't you?", she said quickly, wanting to hide her weakness.

But he did not respond.

"And you are sitting."

Bewildered she glanced into his eyes.

"That you can see, but not, that I'm in my room?"

"I can see no room. I also cannot see what you are sitting on. I see you. Here, where I stand."

Her heart began to pound faster. Was he lying to her? Or did he tell the truth? If so, was he really not here? Could they see nothing, except each other?

"Catch!", he demanded unexpectedly and threw something towards her that had apparently been attached to his belt and that she could not see.

"What…?", she shouted and put her arm in front of her face, afraid the object could hit her. Yet she felt nothing. As she lowered her arm again, she saw his astounded looking face.

"It went right through you. You do not exist here."

"So, I can see you and you can see me", she tried to make the matter as clear as possible, "even though we are at different places?"

As an answer he held up his arm, pointing to the left where her window was located.

"What is it that you can see there?"

"My window", she replied dryly, yet burning with anticipation.

"Window", he repeated and now his aggression towards her left him. "Not here."

Silence lay between them, as both tried to make sense of the situation.

"Why are we connected this way? Why do we see one another?"

She shook her head in reply, had to place her elbow on her table for support.

He came towards her a couple of steps, looking around him again.

"I presume that nobody else would be able to see you. Still I would prefer for nobody to be aware of me talking to a phantom."

"I agree", she said and glanced over to her door which was closed, yet you could never be sure that no one was listening.

"This is absolutely mad", he murmured and held his hand out toward her. "I think, we will not be able to touch? When we touched the other day, the connection broke. Maybe that was the reason why?"

"Maybe", she answered feebly, put out her hand as well and held her breath, as their fingers came closer ever so slowly.

She anticipated to feel his glove, yet her finger seemed to glide right through the leather, before meeting his. Just as her skin touched his he vanished. Into nothingness.

3.

Again there were tears, again there was rage. She stormed up the stairs, so nobody could see her and there he stood.

She jumped and almost fell up the last step.

He did not look at her, trembled with suppressed anger and had his gaze fixed upon a distance that did not exist here.

"What is it?", she whispered and he spun round. In his right hand he seemed to hold an object which stayed hidden to her, but his grip around it tightened.

He was taken aback, only now recognizing her, looked around hectically, before stepping towards her and disappearing with the touch of her arm.

She swayed on the spot and listened to the twittering of birds, being carried to her. Then she ran down the hallway, feeling unwanted. For some reason, it hurt that he had not spoken to her.

Already she became angry with herself, for caring. Probably she was simply too greedy for something to happen! Something unusual. Something that would pull her out of her misery.

And maybe, she tried to reason with herself, he had not been alone. Or too busy, to be talking to her.

4.

Not even two hours had passed. Dabbing away her tears with her bedcover, she lay there sobbing and was almost frightened to death when suddenly a voice thundered in the dark.

"No! No, it cannot be!"

She kept lying there as if petrified and listened to the rattling panting. The voice sounded distorted and only indistinctly she made it out as his.

"Hello", she whispered and switched on the small light next to her bed. There he stood, black against the merely gloomily lightened wall, as the darkness exposed him. Upon his sight she gasped for air and even though knowing he could do her no harm, she crawled as close to the other wall as she could. Away from him.

Over his usual black clothes he had additionally put a black cloak with hood. Beneath it and covering his face, she could see a black helmet, concealing his eyes like a mask.

"There you are again", he spoke muffled through the monstrous looking mouthpiece of the helmet. His figure seemed to shrink, his demeanour less frightening and slowly he lowered his hands clenched to fists.

"Where are you?", she asked him, pulling her blanket up to her chin.

"In my rooms", he replied, pushed back the hood and pulled the helmet off his head. His hair was dishevelled, yet his gaze softer than she had ever seen. The helmet he seemed to toss aside, but she had already lost sight of it the moment it had lost contact to his skin. "And I see, you cry instead of sleeping peacefully."

He came closer, walking, being only a phantom after all, right through her bedside table. Then he apparently pulled a chair towards him and sat down. For her it looked as if he was sitting on air, as he put his elbows on his knees and let his head drop for a moment of exhaustion. However he lifted it again seconds later, looking into her eyes.

"I can see the blanket you are holding on to. And the mattress you are sitting on." He considered and came to the same conclusion as she had. "Because you are touching those with your skin, I assume."

She peered down herself, realised she had put on a t-shirt and long cloth pants for sleeping and, deciding that it would be alright for him to see those, let go of the blanket. Cross legged she set facing him, letting her tears dry out.

"Why are you crying?", he wanted to know almost affectionately, even though he still seemed to force himself to calm down and tame his anger.

Sadly she clicked her tongue and looked down onto the floor. The question no one had ever asked her so far, since she had sworn to herself to never give an answer to it.

"I don't feel that well, see", she mumbled through a tightening throat, avoiding to look into his eyes, though she noticed him searching eye contact.

"Why? You do not look as if there was anything wrong with you."

Uncertain and feeling as if being trapped in a corner, she looked up at the ceiling, searching for words and yet glanced back at him.

"Not everything's external, you know?", she hissed.

For a moment he simply scrutinized her.

"I am sorry."

She gave a start, not having anticipated any compassion.

"And why were you angry today?", she asked as dignified as possible.

Now it was up to him, to seek fitting sentences and it seemed to be just as hard for him as it had been for her.

"When plans fail and one's goal seems to distance itself further and further...", he murmured, looking steadily into her eyes.

She swallowed due to the intensity, dreading suddenly that he could see right into her thoughts.

"Why that cloak? Why that helmet?", she wanted to distract him.

"These are dangerous times and therefore it is best to have some protection at least", he said smoothly, thus arousing her distrust. Where in heaven's name could he be?

"I am also sorry, for making you disappear earlier. I have not been alone and the situation got… out of hand", his voice sank to a growl. Again he clenched his hands to fists, suppressing the rising fury.

"Who are you, anyway?", he asked all of a sudden and with forced upon calmness. "What is your name?"

"Oh", she said surprised. "Rey. And yours?"

He seemed to look for something in her gaze.

"You do not know me, do you?", he whispered, seemed not to trust her.

"No, I don't", she replied quickly. "Should I?"

"No, no, that is quite alright." Yet still, something seemed to irritate him. "My name is Ky…ren."

"Kyren?", she repeated questioning and raised her eyebrows.

"Yes, right", he confirmed, relaxed a little, although still not satisfied with what he found in her eyes. "And where are you from, Rey?"

"Well, from England. I live near London", she revealed.

He frowned and his brows almost touched.

"And where do you live?", she ignored him.

"Currently on a ship. Somewhere between Chramit and Baltiran."

"Oh", she said once more. On a ship? But where? The names "Chramit" and "Baltiran" she had never heard before. "That sounds exciting, even though I'll have to google where that is", she confessed and tried to smile.

"What?", he asked sharply. "What do you mean by that?"

She flinched, having expected a friendly explanation.

"Well, I don't know where… Chram - what was that? - and Bal-thingy lie", she had already forgotten the names.

"You", he began and set up straight. "You want to fool me, right?" His eyebrows narrowed, if possible, even more.

"No, I don't", did she not understand, what he could mean. "I'm sure one can't know every little island there is."

He looked stern, again searching for something and let his eyes wander between hers.

"Are you lying to me?", he whispered and leaned forward.

"Of course not." His accusation offended her and now it was up to her to get angry. "I don't know where you are. Heaven, as if that was such a big deal."

"No, I believe you", he stayed completely calm, yet having his gaze connected firmly to hers to prevent her from looking away. Bound by his dark eyes. "You are telling the truth."

Poring, he released her, closed his eyes for a moment and she felt her breath going freely again.

He sat there, thinking, she on the other hand bent forward to snatch her phone off her bedside table and typed swiftly.

"What was that, Charmi…?", she asked concentrated.

"Chramit", he replied flatly.

Maps searched for results.

"Doesn't exist", she said confused and disappointed. "And what was that other one? Bal…"

"Baltiran."

"Hmm… nothing", she mumbled, looking uncomprehendingly toward him.

"What is it that you are trying to do? Is that a device for navigation?"

"No, that's my phone." She looked at him, upset. "Now you wanna pull my leg, yah?"

"Not at all", he said silently and shook his head, before he searched in her eyes for the truth again. "Where are you? On what planet?"

"Ha, ha", she said mirthlessly and put her phone aside. This conversation started to annoy her. If he only wanted to make bad jokes, he could just as well leave again. "Very funny. 'Cause you of course are not on Earth", she tried to put as much sarcasm into her voice as stood to her disposal.

"No, I am afraid, I am not", he whispered and his gaze gained back strength as if he wanted to convey his honesty only through eye contact.

Fully engaged by that, she could do nothing but hesitantly whisper back.

"You must be lying."

"No, I do not", he replied with the trace of a smile. Her eyes widened as the shock of his transformation struck her. Had his rage always disfigured him, so did his kindness now change his features completely. At once he seemed so caring that her heart took a great leap.

"For I have heard of 'Earth' as little as you apparently have off the Matriak-System."

"What?" Her thoughts were racing, could not comprehend.

"But I understand, that from 'Earth' you do not travel to space", he observed, "otherwise it would be no surprise to you that there are people living on other planets as well."

He could impossibly be telling the truth, that would be wholly insane, she decided. Someone was playing a trick on her, there was no other possible explanation.

He seemed to guess what was going on inside her head, for her expression amused him obviously.

"I know, that must sound crazy to you. But actually it is just common sense, once you think about it."

She snorted incredulously, as she could not think of a retort.

"Can you tell me, where 'Earth' is? In which solar system?"

She shook her head slowly, while not taking her eyes off of him. Now it was her, looking for the lie in his eyes.

"Hmm… and how many planets does it have? Do you know that?"

"Nine", she replied automatically, then corrected herself, "ah, no, just eight. Pluto's too small."

"Ah", he said and now shook his head, as something seemed to entertain him. "Well, I will see if I can find anything fitting to that description. And until I can give you any proof, you just have to take my word for it, I am afraid. As I can see that you do not believe me."

She swallowed. Of course she did not believe him.

He smiled once more, held his hand out and instinctively she laid hers onto it. He disappeared, took her newly awakened feelings away with him and left her behind with tangled thoughts.

5.

"Do not be scared, it is me", a murmur came out of the semidarkness and naturally she gave quite a start. Weeks had passed in which she had started to believe, this strange connection had ceased. Yet now he stood before her.

"For how long have you been standing there?", she croaked in a rough voice. Her tears had dried out, even though her eyes felt swollen still.

"Not for long", he groaned, ruffling through his hair with one hand and sitting down on the floor, exhausted, where he sat cross legged for a while, thinking. She left her table and walked over to her bed, taking a seat on its edge to sit across from him.

"How come you only appear, when I feel bad?", she asked into the silence and he shook his head, lifting it. "When I sit here crying and you rage through your rooms in anger?"

"I do not know", he admitted and kept his silence again, brooding about something, of which he seemed unable to let go.

For a long time they did not speak another word, him being completely subdued to his own thoughts and she doing her best to shake off her sorrow. She took her time surveying him, his slim and athletic build, his face partly covered by his hair and the strange clothes he wore. In fact, she noticed, had she never seen such clothing before. She knew neither their fabrics nor their cuts. A long cape held together by a broad leather belt. Who in this world would wear such attire? Combined with the helmet he had worn the other day. Could all this really be a giant trick played on her? Or did he tell the truth?

He moaned exhausted, which tore her out of her thoughts. Simultaneously they lifted their heads, looking at each other.

"At first I thought these meetings were happening randomly. But as it seems, they are not", he thought aloud. "For the connection does not seem to work one-sided. Since yesterday total mayhem is going on over here, yet you did not turn up."

"Until a moment ago I felt good", she whispered, lowering her eyes to the floor.

"Yes, I thought so", he nodded, "only if both of us are beside ourselves, we are able to see each other."

A new pause arose.

"But for what?", he spoke as if to himself.

"No idea", she breathed and could no longer fight the tears. They fell towards the ground and hastily she wiped her cheeks.

"You are still crying?", he whispered and jerked forward as if trying to touch her in comfort, but could just hold himself back so not to make her vanish.

"I'm sorry", she said, "it'll be over in a moment."

Helplessly he looked up at her. "Is there anything I can do?"

"No", she tried to re-establish her composure, "but thank you." His sympathy surprised her, but brought back warmth into her body.

"Is there no one else, who could help?", he whispered seriously.

She shook her head. "No. 'Cause nobody knows, that I don't feel well." She sniffed, forced herself to smile to brush off the sadness. "Maybe you're here, just because of that. To distract me, when no one else does."

She did not really mean it, yet he seemed to think about her words nevertheless.

"Perhaps so", he mumbled.

"And you're no longer upset. So it helped you as well."

"Hah", she said, as an idea seemed to have struck him. However, one that scared him, for his eyes widened and he stared fixedly to a point somewhere to her left. Probably taking in something she could not see.

"What is it?", she wanted to know, curious, if he might have come across the answer.

"I cannot really tell", he breathed, still gazing. "It would be…" His voice faded, as he seemed to continue the sentence in his thoughts. Again it took long for him to speak again, changing the subject abruptly.

"I found a correspondence as a matter of fact. To what you have told me about 'Earth'."

Somewhat put off that he let her stay in the dark, she grimaced, remembering the absurd discussion they had had last time.

"Did you, now?", she asked doubtfully while asking herself what weird stuff he would come up with today.

"It has to be the P513-74500 of the Orquasim-System", he revealed as if that settled the matter.

"Aaaaand that means?", she asked openly sceptic.

"That it is no wonder you did not understand what I meant. You and your planet are not part of this galaxy. Nor of neighboured ones. Completely cut off, because the P513 is quite out of the way of anywhere and offers no relevant resources."

"If you say so", she said, reluctantly feeling her scepticism wavering. Could he really be making up all this stuff?

"I do not mean it in an offending way. I is just as it is", he said shrugging. "The last time your people came into contact with outside living was over four hundred years ago. These foreigners then decided on leaving the planet to itself and went."

"But this is just", she began, internally fighting the idea, "complete nonsense. I mean, I admit that something weird is going on here. But far away galaxies, foreign planets and… and…" She got lost for words.

"See here", he said, rising to his feet, he pulled off one of his gloves and put his hand to the wall behind him. His skin touched a large piece of paper, looking something like a map, but showing lots of circles connected by lines.

"The Matriak galaxy", he continued. "Yours is not depicted here. It is 3.802.0… well, that would not matter, let us say quite far away from here." She showed no reaction. "A journey to your planet would take about five days. In hyperspace, that is."

Franticly, he looked for something to make her grasp what he was saying and she tried to understand. He had decided to believe her. Should she therefore do the same?

"And you're not lying to me, promised?", she murmured, following those lines on the map with her eyes.

"No, I am not", he assured her. "I promise."

She swallowed, then nodded. Their gazes met, sparks erupted. He came back to her, squatting down so they could see eye to eye. "I will try to find out something, maybe then things will get a bit clearer."

He held out his hand, as if wanting to close a deal. And she took it.

6.

He stood with his back turned to her, yelling, cursing and lashing about with something.

"Hey!", she said, still being choked by sorrow.

He turned round so fast, that he turned into a storm of blackness before her eyes. She uttered a silent scream and held her breath, as the masked face stopped just before her own. His left hand smashed into a wall next to her head, leaning on it to put all his might into the swing of his right arm.

She closed her eyes, forgetting that she was in no immediate danger, as her reflexes kicked into gear.

"It is you!", he roared, was able to restrain his arm just in time and leapt away from her.

She had never seen him this livid. He sneaked around her like a beast of pray lurking and slashed his arm through the air again and again. She imagined some kind of weapon in his hand and lights flickered across him, the sources of which she could not see.

"Maybe it is because of you!", he accused her, "Ever since this whole madness began, everything is escaping my grasp. Is my power fading!"

"And you wanna make me responsible for that?", she asked, shaking as she recovered only slowly from the fright he gave her. "How could it be my fault? Just as well could I reproach you for the fact that all those weeks now I can hardly ever calm down again! That everything goes wrong!"

He hurled his weapon onto the ground, tore the helmet of his head and let his back collide with a wall, where he stayed, panting.

She wiped away the remaining tears, walked a few steps down the path towards him. His shoulders quivered and for once he also seemed close to tears.

"I can't bear this any longer", she whispered. "I want peace again. No galaxies, but control over what is happening to me."

She lifted her hand, thinking about touching his shoulder, yet he raised his head and shouted: "Wait! Do not go!"

She made her hand hold still and peered at him questioningly.

"What?"

He looked firmly into her eyes, as if this would prevent her from going.

"I think, I start to understand", he panted, "I do not have time now to explain, but do me a favour, will you?"

A favour? What was it that she could do for him?

"What is it?", she asked and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"Try to feel what is inside you. Try to perform something, no one else would be able to."

"And what should that be?", her mood sank even lower, "I can't do anything, that others…"

"Maybe you can", he interrupted her self-loathing and straightened up, still breathing hard. "Try. Feel it. But should it work, do not go further. Wait for me, then I will be able to help you!"

His head jerked away from her, as he seemed to react to a shout, yelling at someone invisible: "A moment, I will be there!", before he turned back to her.

"Maybe I am wrong", he murmured, so quietly she could hardly understand. "But I think, I understand."

Then he smiled sadly and raised a hand. But not as she thought to touch her arm. Instead he raised it to her cheek and dissolved.

7.

The whole night she had been lying awake, pondering his words and trying to understand, what he might have meant by them. What was is that she should be able to do? What was it that she should feel?

Throwing all suspicion aside, she was determined to get to the bottom of this. Pursuing the incomprehensible possibility that he was right. For that, she looked for a quiet spot, sat down there and waited.

To feel he had said. Feel. In thoughts she felt for every corner of her mind, looking for something, of which she did not know what it was. Hours passed by. The sun right outside the window climbed as high as it could, left its zenith, while she seemed to be no closer to the riddle's solution.

Disappointment stretched out inside her, followed by a sudden pain, she could not assign. The unexpected blow robbed her of her breath and frightened she opened her eyes. She felt a wall break down in her thoughts and everything she had tried to suppress came smashing down on her. She had allowed frustration too much space and the beasts in her head now devoured it like ravenous wolfs would the cadaver of a dear.

A scream, which was not her own, made her jump to her feet. Yanking up her head she immediately spotted him and in an instance it became clear to her that something was horribly wrong. He let himself fall backwards, tumbling against something and, leaning against it, slid to the ground where he stayed laying, breathing heavily.

"Kyren", she panted afraid and ran over to him, kneeling down at his side.

"It is you", he coughed, pressing his hand to his ribs. She gasped for breath and put her hands to her mouth in horror, as she spotted the gaping wound. Blood poured out of it from beneath his fingers and drenched his torn clothes. With his free hand he pulled his helmet off his head, greedily drinking fresh air and grimacing, bit his teeth as the tightening of his ribs caused him pain. Writhing, he cursed in agony.

"What… what can I do?", she stammered desperately and yet knew the answer herself. There was nothing she could do.

"There they are already", he growled and his gaze went out of focus. "They will help me."

"But what happened?", she whispered in a trembling voice, cursing her futility.

"Attack… the Force, it…", he could utter only broken words.

Then he was lifted into the air, first at his shoulders, then his legs. It looked as if he was floating and his head rolled back as he lost his consciousness.

"Kyren!", she screamed helplessly and grabbed his hand.

8.

She did not bother to suppress her grief. Deeply shaken and fully upset she only waited for him to appear. This time she welcomed the familiar stiffness, the numbness, because they would bring him to her.

Not even trying to sleep she lay wide awake on top of her bed, listening to the silence and hoped her thoughts might reach him.

"I knew you would come", she finally became aware of his voice and stood up from her bed that quickly that her sight became blurred for a moment. To her amazement he was already up on his feet again, even though leaning against a wall for support. He wore no shirt, stood before her topless, which made her able to make out the full extent of his injuries. Freshly closed wounds ran along his shoulders, down his chest and even his arms. That, which over twelve hours ago had been open flesh of his side, was now prepared with something that looked like a black metal net, holding together his skin. She stared at it, stunned that he seemed that well again already and disgusted by those painful seeming wires.

"That will be alright", he said, breathless still. "It is only supposed to close the wound. Then it will be removed." Swaying he moved through the room and took a seat apparently on his bed. She averted her eyes, worried, yet also ashamed for having stared at him that openly. However he did not seem to be bothered by that and moaning, let himself fall onto his pillows, still sitting upright.

"Excuse me, but I need to rest", he said with gritted teeth as the movement pained him.

"S-sure", she stammered embarrassed and walked up to him, holding out her hand before her. "I'll leave."

"That is not what I meant", he murmured. "You can stay. I only have to lay down a bit."

"Of course", she did not know where to look, therefore staring down at the floor, "I'd like to stay. This whole time I waited, in order to hear how you're doing."

"Thank you, that was nice of you", he seemed to be actually pleased about it and she risked to take a look at him. Silently he smiled and her legs seemed to fail her. This gentleness turned him into a completely different man and she could sense the warmth that his smile emitted. She went over to her desk and pulled the chair up to the position, where the edge of his bed was located, so she could sit next to him. Cautious to leave some distance between them, so that they would not touch.

"So", she began hesitantly, "they patched you back together?"

"Indeed", he confirmed. "It almost took them tree hours to do so, because some fragment had been caught between my ribs and had to be removed first. And an hour ago I became conscious again." He shifted in his pillows, seemed to be looking for a more comfortable position, in which his injuries would not bother him.

"And yet you got angry again already?" In doubt she glanced at him, his eyes however darkened.

"I received a report about… well, about the attack", he growled, his voice getting harsh and his eyes not looking at her directly. Was there something he wanted to hide? "Something got completely out of hand. They were stronger than they were supposed to be."

"A-are you at war?", she whispered and began to shiver. She had the luck of living in a country that was at peace.

He hesitated, seemed to weigh his words. "Yes, something like that", he said. "It is rather war than peace, but no state of emergency either."

She shivered, not knowing if she wanted to hear any more about it or if he even wanted to tell.

"I was really worried about you", she said instead and smiled sadly. "I really thought you had to die and I couldn't do anything to help you."

"I am sorry, I did not want to scare you like that", he whispered almost gently. "But it is nice of you, to be worried on by behalf. After all we hardly know each other."

"Maybe", she breathed, "and yet you know me better than most people by now." Bitterness burned in her throat, but she pushed it aside. "Are you somewhere at safety now?"

"Yes, we returned to the ship", he said, "where I will sit and wait until I am fit for use again. And until then, I can… well, deal with the idea I had." For a second he looked away, but almost instantly back at her.

"I", she began, "I tried to feel. But then…"

"Yes, then I got in the way", he said amused. "Keep trying. It can take you a while, to find it. But then you will understand what I mean."

She nodded, tightening her grip on the chair's seat. Troubled, tired and yet relieved she let her gaze wander down to the mattress on which he lay as if she wanted to touch it with her eyes. She noticed a movement of his arm, as he raised it up to her face. Did he want to send her away? Yet just before her cheek he stopped his fingers, caressed the air between them and let his hand sink down again.

"I really hope I will be able to help you then", he murmured and smiled once more. She returned the smile and felt, for the first time in a long while, being freed.

9.

Days passed. Then weeks. She would have loved to see him again, yet even the thought of him prevented the emptiness to spread inside her. His smile she carried around with her like a talisman that protected her from the beasts within.

She used the time to try and find what he suspected in her whenever she came across a peaceful moment. Most times she walked out into the forest, sat down onto benches or cut down trunks, listening, reaching out inside of her. She let her thoughts wander freely, through her head, her spirit and her soul. Discovered beautiful things and ugly ones.

Until at some point she registered something new: the living all around her. And the dying. The wind, the sun's warmth, the earth and the water. The energies which surrounded all this as well as herself. Which permeated her. And suddenly she could see it clearly: that, which she was looking for, that, which he had meant. A force inside her that she could seize to manipulate all those strange energies.

As she opened her eyes, she saw that the world around her had come to a hold. Leaves hung motionless in the air, insects had stopped in their flight and an absent gust of wind bent the grass at her feet. She gave a frightened start and let go. Everything continued its motion and she leapt up, horrified of what she had done.

Then however realisation kicked in. The realisation of what she had succeeded to do and she was unable to suppress a laugh. Again she searched for this force inside her and dived into it. Looking around, she found a stone lying at the path's edge, concentrated upon it and ordered the force to lift it up. It took her several attempts, but finally the stone moved, quivering arose into the air. Only a few inches, then her concentration broke, just as the connection to the stone did and it fell to the ground again.

Stunned and breathing hard as if she had been running for miles she stared down at her hands as if she could find an explanation there. Yet there was only one, who could explain. He had known what she would be able to do. And to him she had promised to wait.

10.

Wait. For something she both feared and longed for. It would befall her sooner or later. That she knew. And always she had wished for it to delay. But now she was made to persist in anticipation. And she did not know which of the two was harder to bear. Again and again she looked for that force, making sure it was still there, yet refraining from using it. He had promised to help and on that she trusted.

Then, as she became sure that it would be the waiting that would drive her to madness, his figure turned up in front of her. His gaze was agitated, almost desperate and furious he flung something away from him. She ducked automatically and at last, his eyes found her.

"My goodness, finally", he panted. Taking large steps he came toward her. "I already started to think it was all over. That something had happened to you…" He halted, scrutinizing her closely.

"How are you?", she breathed and her pulse quickened excitedly. "Did your wounds mend alright?" Briefly she looked down at his side as if she could see right through the black fabric onto his skin to make sure herself.

"There is barely anything to see", he said smiling, even though something still seemed to occupy him.

"That's good", she whispered and breathed heavily in relief. "It almost drove me mad not to know if you were alright."

"And how did you do?", he wanted to know, letting his eyes wander between hers.

She gave him a smile, before reporting proudly: "It worked", she whispered. "I found it. That, which has been inside me and of which I had no idea it existed."

A mixture of astonishment and joy spread across his face and drove away the remaining anger.

"I knew it!", he yelled elatedly, wanted to grab her shoulders in jubilation, could only just restrain from it by taking a step back instead and punched the air with his fists. "I knew it, hah!" A triumphant laugh escaped his throat and he began pacing up and down. "Now everything makes sense! The connection! The balance!"

She sat down slowly, looking at him inquiringly, while her hands started shaking with anticipation. "What do you mean by that? What is that… that… force?"

"That force", he began, "is a power that ties everything in existence and insures harmony between it. Some are able to use it, just as you are now, but because of that an imbalance can arise between light and dark, life and death. Between good and evil if you will. For that reason it connected us. As we are the only ones who can use it in that way. At least at the moment."

"This… this connection?", she let her finger wander between them, pointing in turn at either him or herself.

"Correct. It searches for those, who can utilize it and has connected us, so that we provide balance."

She frowned. "Wha- what do you mean by balance?"

He thought about his answer for a long time, yet continued: "If darkness has gotten too strong somewhere, light needs to emerge."

"And that means?"

"That the darkness inside you tries to gain your power. And that you now need to learn to strengthen the light. Only by doing that, the balance can be restored."

She swallowed, as she felt sure he could see right to the bottom of her soul.

"Is it the same with you then? That your anger displaces the light?"

"You could put it like that", he said hesitantly.

"And now we're responsible to restore that harmony?", she breathed.

He nodded, tensing his jaw. "That is why I asked you not to try and control the Force on your own. The darkness could become too strong and by that could harm not only the Force, but yourself as well."

"What would happen if the darkness would grow too strong?"

"The imbalance would create chaos. In nature and in its being's heads."

She took a deep breath, yet he held up his hands to soothe her.

"It will not, if you learn to control it. The balance can develop and light gets more solid." He walked up to her, kneeling onto the floor in front of her.

She nodded, although she still did not fully comprehend.

"That is to say, if you want to learn to control it", he added, smiling. "That is up to you."

"I got a choice?"

"There always is a choice. Even though the Force will not seize to try and win you over. It needs you."

Swallowing she did not know what to make off it.

"So? What do you think? Shall I show you the way to the Force?" He stretched out his hand, just as he had done once before.

Even before consciously deciding on it, she accepted by letting her palm levitate merely an inch above his. She confirmed the deal without touching him.

"Please, do so", she murmured.

"My pleasure." He stood up and started thinking aloud. "But now we need to decide, how to approach this. We cannot wait for when and if we meet. That is too uncertain. And too dangerous. I am not alone after all. And you probably are not as well."

"And what's it you're trying to say by that?"

"That I think, that the wisest thing to do would be to keep this a secret. Nobody should know I am going to train you to use the Force, as there are many, who would try to manipulate you, try to win you over to their side, in order to have your powers working for their cause. And because of that… I think it would be best, if we would withdraw completely. To somewhere, where no one can find us. For a few weeks. Maybe months and then return."

"And how do you imagine that to work?"

"I do not quite know yet. I would need to think about it more. It should not be a problem for me to disappear for a while if I would claim I needed the time to strengthen my own powers. I could return to the base from time to time, so they would not get suspicious here." He looked at her. "And what about you? Can you imagine leaving 'Earth' behind and embark on this adventure?"

She felt unsure for the fragment of a second. After all, all kinds of things could happen on such a journey and she did barely know him indeed. Yet she should go with him to who-knew-where? To learn how to use that force?

The prospect however, on becoming the first to leave the solar system, to see space, foreign planets, maybe even strange creatures, sounded tempting indeed!

"I think, I can!", she said determined and got to her feet as well. Here it was, the chance of a lifetime!

"Very well", he seemed pleased, yet immediately supported his head with his hand when thinking. "Then I will begin to plan it out, prepare the ship and next time we see each other, hopefully I will have made some progress."

"If there's anything I can help you with, please let me know", she wanted to contribute in some way. Otherwise she would feel useless.

He laughed. "You could try to find out where and when it would be best for a spaceship to land on 'Earth', without being noticed by the whole planet. We want to disappear in secret after all."

She also had to laugh. "I'll see what I can find."

They looked each other in the eyes, did not speak for a long time. The connection they shared had grown in depth today.

"Why do you want to do this for me?", she asked after some time, as the silence started to overwhelm her.

He took a moment to think about his answer.

"The balance is not only important to the Force, but to us as well. Though I hope I will be able to help you, primarily you are helping me. For when the balance is established, I will be able to utilize the Force more effectively again."

"Very pragmatic", she said with a smile and he also could not suppress a grin, as they took each other's hand.

11.

Their next meetings they spent with steaming heads bent over maps and lists sitting on the floor and planning in muffled voices. He had located an abandoned planet lying in his galaxy, yet at the outer rim in a solar system of little importance.

"The Ahch-To should be a perfect hideout", he murmured. "It consists of one gigantic ocean with lots of small islands. On one of those we will be able to train."

"And nobody will discover us there?"

"I know of no one who would make their way there. The planet is deserted and there is nothing there of any interest."

From Earth a journey to this planet would take about four days. On their way there they would begin their training with first concentration exercises, so she could get acquainted with using the Force.

"The One-Man-Capsule has been maintained and is now operational. On the island I am going to teach you how to navigate it. I would not like to entrust our venture to either chance or luck. We will be dependent on them enough already."

He would return to his base from time to time, in order to uphold the lie of this own exile of training, yet with the capsule she would still have a vehicle to her disposal in case she needed to escape.

Food, if necessary, and fuel they would be able to acquire on a close by planet.

"And I will bring translation equipment with me", he went down a list of things he needed to remember to take with him. "Should indeed the unthinkable case arise and I am not there to help you, you would need to be able to communicate."

"What?", she sat up and looked at him bewildered. "We're talking right now, aren't we?"

"Yes, and that confused me for quite some time", he explained. "How could it be, that there are whole galaxies lying between us, but no language barriers? I presume therefore, that it is the Force that enables us to understand each other. Yet probably this will not work anymore, with someone who is not connected to the Force."

She had never thought about that, nevertheless what he was saying seemed plausible.

"And I think", he went on, "this should be all. I could set out in three days and would be with you in additional five days. The coordinates I was able to transfer into the navigation system of my ship and found an accordance." She had chosen a fallow field as his landing spot, which lay on top of a hill in the woods. That way no farmer would wonder about what had destroyed his crop, after they had flown away. Plus it would be far enough from streets and villages, so hopefully nobody would notice them, who would then spread wild stories about space ships and aliens. The arrival and departure should be covered by night. They had agreed to meet at three in the morning, a time at which the least amount of people should be on their way.

"I will await the right moment in space and assume that the devices of your scientists will not be able to register my ship at light speed. And even if they should notice something, we will be long gone before they could do something about it." That was a risk they had to take.

"And our time calculation will definitely match yours? If you landed at noon, that would be quite the sensation."

"No, no. We got the same hours as you do. There had to be somebody to tell your mathematicians about that", he said with a grin.

"Well then. We got everything, don't we?"

"I think so, yes." He flicked once more through his lists. "Looks like everything is done. Leaves me to burn these, so nobody can find them in my absence. I trust them to look through here the moment I am away."

"Good", she swallowed as she became aware all of a sudden that the biggest adventure of her life lay just ahead. And she did not feel ready for it at all.

"Does anybody have any suspicions?"

"No, I don't think so", she said and her mouth felt dry. "I told them, I'd go abroad for a while. Most of them seemed confused by that, yet they did not ask any weird questions. And nobody would guess at the truth." Her thoughts still circled around their plans, assuring herself that nothing had been left unspoken off.

He smiled understandingly and pulled a bowl towards him in which he burned their plans in a fire staying invisible to her.

12.

Eight days she had to be patient for. Eight long days that felt like eight event- and sleepless years. Again and again she went through the plan in her head, felt reassured by having thought about seemingly everything and then worried when becoming aware of all the things that could go wrong. Yet, she reminded herself, he would be with her. At least for most of the time. And he would make sure of everything going as planned.

Then, finally, her last evening on earth arrived. She could not wholly take it in, distracted herself from being too agitated by packing everything she might need into her bag. She would not even try to sleep.

Seven o'clock and she forced herself to eat something.

Nine o'clock and eventually the sun set.

Eleven o'clock and a light rain began drizzling.

One o'clock and the rain turned to fog, wrapping the wooded hills.

Two o'clock and she left the house, stealthing away like a thief on the run. Every now and then she looked uncertainly over her shoulder, as she walked down the street, to make sure that nobody was following her. Even the scurrying shadow of a cat or the distant banging of a car's door made her flinch and only when she left the last houses behind, when the cool underneath the trees surrounded her, she could breathe freely.

Never had she been to the forest at night, yet it was more peaceful than she had expected. Though the darkness between the trunks was almost perfect, at least pale light found its way down to the path. She came past the spot where she had encountered him for the first time and even her heart seemed to recognise this place as it began to bump madly at right that moment. Due to her excitement she could not understand that reaction, yet after a while realised that she was mainly excited about seeing him. Really seeing him. Not only as a phantom.

It was an exhausting hike over rough paths, which went up and down and the strap of her bag cut painfully into her shoulder.

After countless turns she could finally make out the field and her eyes looked down upon the display of her phone.

Still ten minutes to go. Then it would be three o'clock and a space ship would appear in the sky.

As she stood there in the dark, doubts befell her for the first time.

What, if he did not come? What, if everything, their planning, the visions, he himself, had all been an illusion? If she waited in vain for a miracle to happen?

Her heart sank and her knees felt shaky, as she looked hopefully upward into the veiled sky. She welcomed the mist, as it would provide additional cover, yet it left her terribly nervous, being unable to see even the stars. Let alone possibly blinking lights, even if they were just those of a passing airplane.

But even before lights actually appeared above her, she heard the steady rumbling of an engine. No engine, like that of a car, for it sounded deeper and much more powerful.

A silhouette detached itself from the fog and sank towards the ground.

Stunned and yet relieved she looked at the ship. It was flat, had a tapering front in which he suspected the cockpit to be and now put up two enormous instruments that looked like wings. Amidst loud hissing its feet were pushed forth on which the ship then landed. It caused a muffled impact, which made the earth quiver and an unreal silence lay down upon the forest as if every sound in it had died. Complete obscurity seemed to prevail inside the ship, so it would attract as little attention to it as possible and for a moment nothing happened. But then, a hatch was opened at the underside of the ship, was lowered and it formed a ramp over which the ship could be entered.

13.

Above that ramp a pair of boots appeared which carried down his figure to her. She took a deep gasp for air as she became aware of his face in the dark, tensed her whole body, just like he did. He held his breath as he came toward her, his gaze fixed to her eyes as if unable to believe what he was seeing.

She felt no different. This in any way completely insane situation fully overstrained her, yet the sight of him made her almost loose her mind. Her heart raced inside her chest, as if it wanted to burst out of it, to let itself fall into his hands.

The intensity of their gazes strengthened with every inch they came closer and she felt sure that she would never be able to free herself of this rigidity. That she had to linger, frozen for all times to come.

An eternity had passed until he halted before her, breathing heavily and just as agitated as she felt. Unable to do anything else than to keep staring at him, she stayed motionless.

He swallowed, nodded shortly and disengaged the bond of their eyes.

"I think we should get going, before anybody detects us. Let me take your bag", he said in a deliberately calm and firm voice, through which she could nonetheless still make out his tautness. And for the first time she became aware of an entirely peculiar sounding language beneath his words, which the Force transformed into hers. He put out his hand for the bag's strap around her shoulder and she handed it over to him. She understood. They would wait. Wait for the pressing matters to pass.

He went back to the ship and climbed up the platform, while she took a last glance around. In her mind she said farewell to her world, wondering when she would return, before following him, somewhat hesitantly, yet immensely curious.

Inside the ship there was a smaller room, than the outside made her believe. Probably, because its main part consisted of machinery and gears. He sat with his back turned in the cockpit behind her, where all sorts of small lamps shone in different colours and quietly sounding beeping noises could be heard. In front of her there was a wall through which led a narrow passageway into a second room, thus being separated from the control one. Yet she spotted a back window beyond said passage, towards which she now stepped to watch their departure from Earth. He closed the hatch and a moment later the floor on which she stood began to rumble, as the ship gained height.

The field became rapidly smaller, until the fog swallowed it and then she could overlook the whole forest, the lights of the smaller villages and towns and finally a fallen ocean of stars.

This had to be London, she thought and grabbed for her phone to take pictures.

Gaining speed the space ship left England behind. She saw islands, then the European continent, France, Germany, Norway and the black Atlantic Sea.

She gasped as beyond the edge of the world the sun appeared, immersing the Pacific See and East Asia into its daylight. Moved, she felt tears rising to her eyes.

"That has to be the most beautiful thing ever", she whispered, now able to see the whole planet and being blinded by the sun.

Spellbound by the view, she just stood there, leaving her home behind and did not even notice him stepping to her side.

"Wonderful, is it not?", he murmured, yet she did not even give a start. Almost natural had his unexpected appearances become to her.

"Wonderful", she repeated, straightening herself and turning to him, yet unable to detach her gaze from the steadily distancing Earth. She put her phone into her pocket. Then her eyes found their way to his and immediately sank into their depth. As in the forest the reality of his presence struck her. He was real, was he not? Or would he vanish upon her touch?

They stood there, motionless, wordlessly looking into each other's eyes.

Both were breathing hard, almost panted. Her heart screamed to leave her body, while his chest rose that much, that she thought his heart had to flee from it every moment. She became dizzy. Could one suffocate off too much oxygen?

Slowly he raised his left hand, until it was level with her shoulder, its palm turned toward her. She saw it out of the corner of her eye and almost fell forward as her heart skipped a beat. She did not know if she could muster that same courage, if she would even succeed in moving a muscle.

Yet as if on its own accord, her hand found its way towards his, came closer to it bit by bit until they were separated by merely an inch. For ages they kept standing there like this, did they look each other in the eyes.

Then their palms touched, could they feel each other. Intoxicating validation surged through them both. She had to gasp for every breath, could not feel her body anymore, which was held upright by a different power than her own, as it was seeping out of her limbs. He on the other hand seemed to gain strength, appeared to be growing and a smile was playing upon his lips.

His right hand softly enclosed her left and a silent laugh made his chest tremble. She gave room to her emotions by breathing shakily through her mouth, as if she had not tasted air for years.

Never again would they be able to see anything else than the other's eyes. Never again feel anything else than the touch of their hands, sense anything else than the other's sensations.

A shrill tone sounded in the cockpit. They noticed it, yet did not let it distract them. Both smiled softly as if they could not believe it still that they were not dreaming anymore, were not chasing phantoms anymore. But they moved away a bit from one another, released the intensive connection and fell back into the present.

The corner of his mouth twitched as he looked down for the fraction of a second. "This is our sign to get going", he whispered. "To fly slowly for ten minutes I figured would be justifiable. It is something special after all to see 'Earth' from above for the first time." Their hands sank down to their waists, both pairs still holding on to each other. "Come with me", he murmured, let her left hand glide out of his own.

He went ahead towards the cockpit. She followed, letting herself be led by the touch of his hand. For one more time she glanced back onto the Earth, small now as a pebble and with unnumbered stars dancing around it.

"Have a seat", he said turning around the chair of the co-pilot for her, so she could sit down. She sank down upon it, thankful for the support of his hand as her legs felt as unsteady as boats in a storm. He took his seat on the other chair, the one of the pilot and their hands left one another. She jerked after his, as her heart seemed to tug her in his direction. He woke briefly from their shared trance reached wordlessly for her fingers when becoming aware of their absence. She leaned back in her chair, beat by the events and completely exhausted by the emotions rushing through her body. To her anchor however she held on.

"So", he stretched the word. "Ready, to really dive into the universe?"

He looked toward her and let his free hand hover above a red button.

"Yes", she whispered, strengthening her grasp around her anchor, which himself sent her confirmation and he pressed the button.

"Be careful, this is going to be bumpy", he called out over an arising humming, as the increasing speed pushed both of them back into their seats. There was an enormous burst as the ship shot forward and after which it calmed down again. She whirled round to the other window, the Earth however had vanished in an ocean of rushing streams of light.

Looking to the front again it seemed as if those lights came straight towards them, yet split just in time in front of the cockpit.

"Are you alright?", he asked calmly again as the loud noise had faded.

"Yes, I think so", she gasped breathless.

"The ship is now able to level out the light speed and its course is calculated precisely so we will not accidently hit something."

"Ah", she said and allowed herself to sink into her chair exhausted and with a buzzing head.

"You look really tired indeed", he said tenderly and smiled at her. "Could it be that you are in need of sleep?"

"Possibly", she replied flatly and tried to sit straight at least. "This night I didn't sleep at all. And the one before that only for a few hours."

"I thought so." Quickly he looked around and then pointed with his hand behind himself. "Do you want to lie down?"

"No, no, too excited for that", she said and stared into the lights before the window.

"Alright. If you are sure about that. Then I can show you around if you would like", he suggested and she let herself be pulled to her feet. The intensity of their touch faded gradually and she shook her head to get it free off it again. Their shared moment of disbelief changed to certainty that they would not disappear anymore and they both started to recover.

"Well then", he said and let go again of her hand, as they went through the open room of the ship into the other, smaller one, "in here the beds are installed", he pointed to the left wall opposite to the window, "and some closets as well." He stepped to the metal paneling and opened a narrow door of one of the closets. "You can put your things in here, if you like. Your bag is here, too." Then he turned right and to a door which he opened to the inside. "The bathroom. Not particularly spacious, but enough, I think, for the short time."

She came to his side and peered into the tiny bathroom. On the first glance everything inside looked the same as she knew them: the shower, toilet, sink and washing machine. And yet they had something strange about them, just as everyday devices had in different countries. But eventually she would adjust to that.

"Hm-hmm", she said as a sign that she had understood and approved.

Lastly he walked past the back window and knocked with his knuckle at the wall on its right. "Behind there is the kitchen, the cupboards left and right are the pantries and in here are things refrigerated", he opened what looked to her like a conventional fridge. "Take whatever you would like and make yourself at home."

"Thank you. I'm afraid I will need some time to process all of this." She straightened up. "Pretty cosy for a mere transport vehicle."

He laughed joylessly. "At times it takes you from one place to another and then there are other times in which you have to spend days inside of it unexpectedly, because a siege or assault extends longer than you have estimated. For that, everything that might be needed should be available and the capacity of this upsilon-shuttle is designed for five people, actually."

She took a deep breath. "Then this is a battleship?"

He only shrugged. "Not a proper one, suited for battle, no. Yet it is built to attack as well as defend. But do not think about that, please."

The broad walls looked threatening to her all of a sudden, as she understood, that behind them were not only engines installed, but probably some bullets or others, which she pictured as missiles and bombs. Now it became clear to her, why the rooms seemed so small compared to the ship's immense outward appearance. Its main purpose was the protection of the people inside not their transport.

"I assure you, it is highly unlikely that we will be attacked by anybody. So, just forget about it." Apparently he had noticed that her worries did not leave her. "I should go back to the front again, to keep an eye on the route."

"Just a moment, I got something here", she said and walked back to the closet, bend down to her bag to rummage in it. After she had found what she was looking for she went back to him to pass it over.

"It isn't much, 'cause I didn't know what to bring to space. Yet I thought, chocolate would never be a bad idea. For you."

Confused he looked down onto the box he was holding. "I... I thank you. You really did not need to bring anything."

"I guess I did. You're doing a lot for me after all. And alone for being able to see the Earth from above I'll be eternally thankful to you. Plus it isn't much anyway."

"Nonetheless, thank you", he murmured and examined the box. "I do not even know what chocolate is in the first place and this writing I cannot read. Is it something to eat?"

"Mind you, it is!" She could not suppress a laugh, even though she could barely hide her shock: "You really don't know chocolate? My goodness, I'm sorry", she teased him. "There is a saying on Earth: Life without chocolate is possible, but futile."

He laughed. "Well, then I really have to try."

"Yes, you do", she confirmed and back in the cockpit they let themselves fall again into their chairs, where he cautiously opened the box to try some of the chocolate.

14.

She did not know how long she had slept for when she opened her eyes again. Actually she could not even remember to have fallen asleep at all. The silvery lights streaked by above her and painted tangled patterns onto every surface of the cockpit. She set up straight and a blanket slid off her shoulders onto her lap.

He must have put it over her body and a wave of heat pervaded her as she thought about having unconsciously come so close to him again. She still needed to get used to the idea, that he was no longer unreachable for her.

Silent clattering behind her made her turn round in her chair.

He stood inside the smaller room, seemingly in front of a kitchenette and looked as if he was stirring in a pot on the stove or rummaging through the cupboards.

Then he noticed her being awake and looked towards her smiling.

"Good morning", he joked and swiftly turned back to his pot, so whatever he was preparing would not burn.

"Good morning", she replied, got up from the chair, on top of which she placed the blanket and stepped hesitantly through the ship to his side.

The tiny inside of the room had completely transformed. It no longer appeared hollow and empty as in the moment she had entered it, but emitted the cosiness of a holiday apartment. From the left wall two beds had been let down, stocked with comfortable looking pillows and blankets. The smooth steel cover of the wall to her right had disappeared and now exposed the kitchenette, complete with sink, stove, even an oven, above which knives, forks and spoons clung magnetically to a long metal piece. He stood in front of it, concentrating on the meal.

"Thanks for the blanket", she whispered, looking at his back.

"No problem", he answered and glanced over his shoulder. "Sorry, but you got to watch these closely, otherwise they burn quickly", he said pointing at the pot with his spoon.

She peered inside and then questioning back at him.

"Was is it you're preparing?", she wanted to know, not able to determine the weird light brown mixture.

"This is going to be a really fine loaf of bread, just wait", he seemed to be amused by her clueless expression. "Cannot be long now and... Ah! You see?" She backed away from the pot, as the mixture suddenly became solid and rose like dough in the oven. At the same moment the scent of freshly baked bread spread through the ship and she felt her stomach beginning to rumble.

"Insane", she whispered impressed as he took the pot off the stove, turned off the hotplate and let the bread drop into a basket. Hungrily they let themselves fall onto the cockpit chairs to try it and she had fun comparing the foreign groceries in the fridge to ones from Earth. Some of them tasted strange, most of them she liked however.

After breakfast he insisted on starting with their first exercises. For that they sat down on the floor of the back room facing each other.

"It will probably be harder for you here to get in touch with the Force", he said calmly, "as there is little life here. Yet it is present, always."

She had some difficulties indeed to concentrate, heard the rumbling of the engines, the buzzing of the lamps and the fridge as well as the silent clattering of dishes in the cupboards. She closed her eyes, seeking this Force inside her consciousness, yet it seemed to conceal itself. Frowning and frustrated she opened her eyes again, looking into his face.

"It doesn't work", she whispered helplessly. "On Earth I was able to find it. Again and again."

"Stay calm. Maybe it will take you a bit more time", he said fully composed. "Just keep looking for it."

They both closed their eyes, reaching out. Him she could sense, his presence, his energy and her heart began to race as she felt this energy gaining power. She peered through a slit between her eyelids and watched him for a moment. He looked as if turned to stone, sat there still, hands laid into one another and no expression on his face. Yet he sent forth strength as she had never felt it before. He seemed to glow like the sun itself that sent its rays out into all directions. For him it seemed easy to get in touch with the Force and she could do nothing but admire this strength.

Quickly she concentrated on herself again, on everything around her. And she understood, why he had urged her to begin with their training. It was by no means natural for her to feel the Force just because she had managed it a couple of times.

Until noon she sat there. At least she thought it to be noon. And nothing happened. He woke her from her trance, so she would eat and drink, would not exhaust herself. After that she kept on searching. She was aware of him getting up at some point, walking into the cockpit or to the bathroom, picking up something to drink or cleaning up the kitchen, yet she did not let herself be distracted by that. Determined, she would stay there as long as it would take the Force to show itself.

Unexpected and just as she became sure that she would not be able to accomplish her task before sinking to the floor in exhaustion, she felt the streams of energy inside her. Hurried not to lose them, she seized them without thinking.

"Wow, what...?", she heard him calling as if from far, far away and she opened her eyes. The blankets and pillows on the beds, the cutlery on the wall and the water in the sink all had risen into the air. They levitated some feet above their previous positions as her powers faded and her concentration tore. The cutlery clattered to the floor and the water splashed back into the sink, drenching him head to toe. With burning lungs and a trembling chest she let herself fall backwards onto the ground, watching the inside of the ship go in circles around her.

His face turned up above her, shocked and worried.

"My goodness", he said, "easy, easy! You do not have to overdo it."

"Sorry", she whispered in a muffled voice. "I... I didn't want..."

"You did not want to lose it again. I know", he tried not to roll his eyes. "But you do not have to hurl yourself at it. It is always there and you would find it again."

"Hmm", she uttered and let herself be helped first into a sitting position and then to get back up on her feet. Her legs had gotten numb by sitting and by loosing so much energy. Swaying and being supported by him she managed to get over to her bed, sat down upon it with her back leaning against the wall. Wordlessly, yet shaking his head he handed her a glass of water, which she drained in just one gulp.

"I never would have thought you that impetuous", he admitted, "otherwise I would have looked after you better."

"Sorry", she croaked and sank beaten into her pillows.

"Quite alright. I am sorry", he said, yet she did not even hear it.

15.

The next day she kept on practicing. Again they sat down facing each other, sank into their meditation and concentrated on the Force.

This time she succeeded earlier in sensing it. At noon she had found it, yet did not dare to lunge for it.

"What is it you feel?" he asked calmly.

"That Force inside of me. Like streams of energy."

"And around you?"

"That same Force. It binds everything together."

"Exactly. But do not subdue it to your will, instead use the paths it leads you to."

"What does that mean?"

He thought for a moment. "That it is the darkness that draws the Force out of itself. It manipulates the other energies, corrupts them. To turn to the light, you should, at least at the beginning, only use the energies that surround us and everything else, because those are the ones you can guide. The darkness subjugates, the light creates harmony."

Again he fell silent to give her time to comprehend.

"Only relying onto the energy inside me creates darkness?"

"Correct. Start with something small to practice", he advised her and threw one of her pillows at her. "Make it levitate, but nothing else. Then you will become able to guide the Force at some point."

She kept her eyes fixed at the pillow as she had done with the small stone back on Earth, however did not dive into the energies that she felt inside herself, instead she concentrated on those surrounding the pillow. And it rose into the air carried by the Force.

"That is better", he praised, as she let the pillow sink down again.

"Thanks", she said a little breathless. "But also harder."

"Because a much higher self control is necessary", he replied. "It is always harder to do, what is not only beneficial to you, but to others also. Nevertheless will it become easier with time, I promise."

After that he allowed her to rest, but already on the following day he had her levitate heavier objects, like a plate, then a book and finally her bag. Then in the evening he wanted her to expand her field of concentration to more objects at the same time. Controlled and not randomly. With that she had far more difficulties, yet he told her that he was pleased by the progress she made.

Then the fourth day of their journey arrived and they headed for the Irkosia solar system, in which lay the small planet of Ahch-To. Excited she sat in the cockpit, watching him steer the ship, yet was distracted immediately as they left hyper space and the surface of the planet came into view. On first glance, it seemed not too different to the Earth, was blue with smaller and bigger grey and brown specks and clouds danced around it like veils of fog.

"Welcome to Ahch-To", he said solemnly. "Well, above it", he corrected and made the ship dive down, race toward the never ending ocean then to one of the islands. Pulling a handle to himself, he reduced the ship's speed and she could hear the reassuring sound of the ship reaching with its feet toward the ground. Leisurely it now approached a patch of grass above rough cliffs and he slightly adjusted the course, so it would not come down in too close proximity of the island's edge.

With a jolt the space ship touched down and immediately she sprang to her feet, curious of the place they would spend their time in and ran over to the hatch. He opened it and while the ramp was still moving she climbed down it bit by bit, jumped into the grass, before the platform had even touched the ground.

She could hear the ocean crashing against the rocks, the wind howling and the rustling of trees. A cool breeze blew towards her, carried damp air and the scent of salt.

They were now located on top of a plateau, could overlook the rough, grey-blue sea to every side, that surrounded the harsh, rocky island and extended to the horizon. Its straight line was disturbed only by further islands.

Her heart pounded excitedly. A foreign planet. A foreign world. And she was really there. Deeply she breathed in that feeling, closed her eyes for a couple of seconds to savour the moment.

Then she turned round and gazed up a hill, behind which towered a dark forest. The trees looked similar to the spruces and pines back home, yet had something definitely strange about them all the same. How far the island stretched beyond it she could not tell. Spray and fog obscured it in uncertainty.

16.

As exciting as she had imagined the stay on a different planet would be, none of the next days became. For hours he had her meditate, strengthen her concentration und influence objects around her. He began to train her reflexes by throwing items at her to catch or guide then with the Force. At some point, he revealed to her, she would be able to do that with closed eyes.

He taught her to fly the ship as well as the small rescue capsule, which had been attached to it. Its regulation was simplified a lot compared to the one of the ship and the vehicle only built to cover minor distances.

On top of it all he gave her instructions on how to use weapons, mainly for close combat, for only inside a strong body could reside a strong spirit. And to be able to defend oneself could never be a waste, he said. Just in case they should be attacked.

Strained thus she quickly fell into a state of constant exhaustion and had the feeling of never getting fully awake again.

"This will also pass with time", he said thereupon, "you only need to get used to it."

She had permanent headaches and went to bed with hurting limps only to wake up with sore muscles.

Him, she never saw asleep. Often she was determined to go to bed later than he did or get up earlier, never succeeded in doing so however. For him their stay on the island, the mental training as well as the physical one seemed not to be tiring at all. On the contrary: He revived, became more and more unrestrained and savoured the time to the fullest.

After approximately two weeks he left her alone on the island for the first time. She moved her things from the ship into the tiny cockpit of the single seated vehicle, so he could return to his base with his ship, without anyone guessing he might not be alone.

"I cannot guarantee that nobody enters the ship", he said. "Would they find your things there, they would become suspicious at once."

For three days he stayed absent, three days in which she continued doing her exercises or explored the island. From above she had discovered by now that it was some three hundred feet wide almost throughout and close to a mile long. It protruded from the waves like a gigantic wall and was, with the exception of the plateau they had landed on, completely covered by woods. In there lived, despite the small area, lots of different animals that were strange to her even though they bared some resemblance to species she knew from Earth. Birds nested between branches, insects hummed through the air and small rodents dug holes underneath roots.

As the night closed in, the fear of him leaving her on her own forever, crept nearer to her as well and loneliness pressed in on her like a straightjacket. Looking for confirmation and support she gazed into the flames of the campfire they had ignited evening after evening and thought of his smile. She caught herself wondering whether he might be thinking about her as well and if he, now that he was gone, missed having her close, just as she missed him.

17.

He seemed stressed out and frustrated as he returned on the set day, came down the ramp looking drained and let himself drop into the grass, sighing. To her question what had happened he only replied:

"That does not need to bother you."

Hardly content with that it hurt that he would not confess to her. He seemed to guess what she was thinking, sat up straight again and continued.

"Really, it is nothing of importance. I just do not think the right decisions were made during my absence, that is all."

He stood up again, returned to the ship to get rid of the black cloak and gloves and proceeded their exercises.

"From today on we will reorder your training a bit", he revealed to her one morning and they climbed up the hill to the forest. There he asked her to sit down on the stump of a dead tree and to make herself comfortable for the upcoming meditation. So she sat and waited for the following lesson.

"You are able to lead the Force well by now, so now it is time to strengthen your connection to it, make it sturdy and therefore more powerful."

"Good", she whispered and closed her eyes. "What am I to do?"

"Can you feel the Force around us?"

"Yes", she concentrated upon it.

"Good, now find it inside you."

She felt for it, found it almost instantly.

"Hmhmm", she said in confirmation.

"This Force", he began, "has to become one with the one around you. That is the way to build up balance. Be in unison with the Force. Feel the connection and let its power grow inside you."

"Alright", she breathed, slowing down her breathing and diving into the stream of energies. She could feel them, touch them.

"What can you see?", he murmured.

"The island", she replied quietly, "the ocean, the forest, the animals."

"Very good. And where are you? Are you sitting on top of the hill?"

For a while she had to ponder what he had said, simultaneously trying to uphold the connection to the Force.

"No. I have my back turned to the island and I look down the cliffs."

"Do not concentrate that much on the Force inside you", he instructed her. "Strengthen the connection."

She shuddered and a sudden cold robbed her off her breath.

"I am alone", he gasped hoarsely, felt panic rising as she could not sense any other Force than her own.

"Turn round!", his voice became firm. "Look up to the forest, to the sun. Not down into the depth!"

She wanted to reply, wanted to shout out for help, but she could not. She stood above the abyss, thinking she might jump, even though she did not know how deep it would go down.

And yet she leapt, let herself fall. Diving into the single stream of the Force.

"Rey?", he immediately understood that something had gone wrong and grabbed her shoulders. "Turn back! Go into the light!"

Again she did not manage to reply. The empty halls which she roamed echoed with unheard screams.

"Damn! Rey!", he bellowed and shook her. "Do not go into the darkness. Come to the light!" He shook her once more and there was a powerful jolt, making the earth crack open between them.

He swayed and almost lost his balance. His grip on her shoulders offered him support and aghast he looked down upon her. Where did these immense powers come from? It was impossible for him to grasp, how the darkness could have gained strength, even though she trained turning to the light. He must have completely underestimated, what had lain slumbering inside her from the beginning.

"Rey", he called again, yet without hope she would react to it at all. How far had she already gone?

The more astonished he was, seeing her eyelids move.

Finally she was able to open her eyes. The emptiness however lingered, the besieging feeling of enclosing restraint and for a long time she could not detect her voice. Terrified and shaken she looked into his face, drained of every colour which had moved aside to a horrified grimace.

"My goodness, you went straight into it", he breathed, gasping just as hard. "I... I did not see that coming." He let go off her, remaining for a moment staring at her aghast, before taking her hands and pulling her to her feet. She yielded and stood swaying on the spot.

"What... what was that? What happened?", she croaked flatly, had to lean upon him so she would not fall.

"It was the darkness calling out to you. And you answered."

She looked up at him and his gaze felt like a further blow. For never before had she seen fear in there.

"And what does that mean?", she sobbed, trying to hold back the tears.

He swallowed, seemed to struggle with his answer.

"That I have been too careless", he whispered in a muffled voice. "That I need to look after you better."

"Oh", she said, only now realising that it was not the uncontrolled power inside of her that frightened him, but the fact something might happen to her.

"Come, I take you back to the ship. You need to lie down", he said and put her arm around his shoulders.

"I... I am sorry", she whispered and wished she could have turned round to the island again.

"You are not the one, who needs to apologise. That is me", he growled, leading her up the ramp through the control room and over to her bed. Once again she let herself drop onto her pillows, looked into his concerned face for one last time and fell asleep.

18.

The sun hung already among the clouds as she opened her eyes again. She let them wander through the ship, looking for him, yet he was nowhere to be seen.

She swallowed heavily, as the last day's events came back to her mind and with difficulties she clambered out of bed, her head throbbing painfully. He had prepared breakfast for her in the kitchen and she ate it up avidly. Her eyes burned with both gratitude and remorse, yet still she suppressed the tears.

To distract herself she glanced over to the cockpit and out of the window, showing her the forest.

"Ah", she said unconsciously as she spotted him. Like she had done yesterday he sat meditating on that dead tree, his hands lying on his lap and his head lowered.

She grabbed the last piece of bread and wanted to leave the ship just as a beep sounded at the control table, being followed by a bad-tempered sounding voice that left a message in some strange language. Her heart sank. Though she had not understood the phrases, she suspected him to be ordered back. And she did not want him to leave.

Upset therefore, she walked down the platform to the outside. Dark clouds gathered above the sea, the waves of which lashed louder than usual against the rocks and the air was damp with spray and looming rain.

Chewing on the last bite she sat down onto one of the stones which marked their fireplace, watching him in his concentration. She noticed the gap in the ground to his feet that she had caused and she shivered. Why hadn't she been able to stay in contact with the Force? For him it seemed so easy. She could feel the energy he emitted growing stronger, saw birds settling down upon his shoulders and he made the waves reach all the way up to the trees.

Some change went through him which she could sense even from afar: he seemed to hold his breath, pulling his head between the tensed shoulders and tensioning his body. The energies expanded abruptly, yet were unleashed by one single stroke. Like a gigantic tide they swept across the island, the birds flew off screeching madly and the ocean buried him beneath its waters.

Scared she leapt to her feet and ran the first steps up the hill, as the raining water revealed him again. Drenched and steaming with anger he stood up from the tree's stump and turned to the ship.

Then his glowering gaze fell upon her and his wrath wavered for a moment.

"Are you alright?", she called out to him, wishing she could do something.

"Just fine", he growled so loud that it was carried to her and fuming he stomped towards her, down the hill.

She halted, uncertain, as she had not seen him this furious in a long time.

"What is it?", she dared to ask as he stopped in front of her. He scrutinized her with a look she could not read.

"The Force, it... it escapes my grasp", he panted through clenched teeth as if in pain.

Feeling guilty she looked to the ground.

"This is my fault, isn't it? Because I'm not in unison with the Force the balance cannot be established?"

She could see the validation clearly in his eyes, nonetheless he shook his head.

"No, it is not. Not wholly so anyway. For I..." He broke off. She dared to look up at him again and again she found that look in his face that she could not comprehend. He seemed to be close to tears, at the same time fighting down something and once again fury flickered in his eyes.

"A message has been left for you", she whispered against her will. "I just heard a voice speaking."

Without saying another word he stormed past her and back to the ship. As if struck by lightning she remained standing on the hill, staring at where his face had been seconds before.

19.

Her presentiment was confirmed and that same afternoon he flew away. Within minutes the loneliness began to crush her and only with the greatest effort she was able to brush off her sorrow. She trained for close combat, using a long staff and fake swords as weapons and even reached for the laser blaster, shooting again and again at the same rock in the water to sharpen her aiming skills. For short flights she climbed into the capsule, partly not to let herself forget how to work it and partly to get to some of the other islands for distraction. On one of them she discovered relicts of a probably long gone civilisation, walls that had outlived long forgotten times and still maintaining buildings covered by ivy.

Yet she refrained from getting into contact with the Force again, scared to do something wrong and stuck to smaller exercises to lead the Force present in nature.

Repeatedly she looked up at the sky as if awaiting to see his ship appearing there and every time disappointment burned down her expectations as soon as she let her gaze drop to the ground again. She tried to deny it, tried to distract herself from his figure inside her head, but she saw him in front of her again and again. When trying in vain to fall asleep at night and when awaking in the morning after having dreamt of him.

Almost a whole week he stayed away from the island and upon arriving again he looked as if he had not slept a wink that whole time. Overwhelmed to finally see him again she did not know what to say. Her thoughts were buzzing inside with all the things she would have liked to tell him, yet she did not manage to seize a single one of them.

Words seemed to have failed him just as well, he came silently toward her and pulled her into a long embrace without any comment, as if they met for the first time after years of parting. Her heart raced, she felt his beating against her chest and she buried her face in the long cloak he was wearing.

"It didn't get any better then?", she asked after an eternity had passed.

"Unfortunately, no", he sighed and she expected him to release her off his embrace. However he pulled her even closer instead. "Quite the contrary." His voice broke.

She pushed herself free from him a bit, just enough to look up at him. The red eyes glanced down at her in pain, wandering across her face as if looking for something there.

"What is this all about? What happened?"

He breathed in hard, kept staring rigidly as if considering whether he should reply or not.

"They have provoked renewed fighting. Wholly unfounded so. And I do not know what I..."

He freed her off his embrace and looked down upon his hands, lost.

"Don't you think you should tell me what kind of war it is, that you're involved in?"

Once again he hesitated.

"To keep it simple: It is the goal of an organisation, which calls itself 'The First Order', to attain power over the whole galaxy. For that they fight the Republic and its Resistance."

Sharply she gasped for air as suddenly comprehension struck her.

"That's why we're here, isn't it? So the same thing that has happened to you won't happen to me as well? That First Order wants your abilities to work for their cause and makes you fight for it?"

His eyes widened, the look inside them however she could not read. He seemed to struggle with something then nodded nevertheless.

Scared she took his hands.

"Can I help you somehow? Is there something, I could do?"

"No, I will not drag you into that", he said quickly and took a step back. "This war has nothing to do with you. You will be free."

Resolutely she took the step toward him again.

"But I want to help you! I've been passive for too long, but now there's finally something I can do. As soon as I know how to use the Force."

He shook his head and opened his mouth to argue, yet she stayed firm.

"As soon as I'm strong enough I'll come with you!", she decided and looked belligerently into his eyes.

He had to give in, if he wanted her to stop.

"Agreed", he said flatly and could not help but smile at her determination.

With burning enthusiasm, now that she had a goal, she practiced relentlessly. He guided her meditations, to prevent her from taking the wrong path again, never letting her train longer than a quarter of an hour, so she would not overstrain herself and at last she seemed to understand. She became aware of the Force's nature, understood the nature of her connection to it and could hand her own Force to the other energies, even if only for moments. Then she broke off the connection, but risked upholding it longer with every time.

Soon he was satisfied with the progress she made, let her stay in meditation longer and encouraged her to open up herself again to the Force.

"Only by doing so you will get stronger. The connection becomes stable, more powerful and soon you will be one with the Force."

They took small steps in the right direction and she felt getting more confident and braver with every day. That brave indeed, that she sat down upon the tree's stump as usual one day and fully opened up to the Force again.

He had let her go ahead, trusting her growing strength and stayed behind tidying the kitchen, when a disruption shook him. It was not the earth that was shaking, but an energy going right through him, that could only emanate from one living being.

Terrified he ran to the hatchway and leaning against the wall with one hand, looked down the ramp in panic, yet could not see her anywhere.

"Rey?", he called questioningly and hurtled outside, spinning round and looking up toward the forest. There he could see her, levitating above the tree's stump, within a whirling storm of leaves, branches and twigs.

"Rey!", he yelled and ran as fast as his legs would carry him up the hill. "Stop it! Stop it!", he bellowed at her pleadingly, yet she did not move, did not seem to even hear him.

Arriving at the hill top, he did not hesitate for one second and threw himself through the whirl, being whipped, hit by branches, but he ignored the wounds and cuts they tore into his skin. Supporting himself with one knee on the stump, he grabbed her shoulders, seized her as hard as he could and shook her.

"Rey! Stop it", he screamed again. "Do not go this way! Please, come back!" With all his might he forced her back towards the ground, still shaking her, yet she did not react to him at all.

Panic imbued him, as he could not reach her and his yells became more and more desperate. The emptiness in her wide eyes frightened him and hopelessness pierced his body with a hundred knifes.

"Stay with me!", he called, she however stayed rigid and motionless.

Stay with me!, it kept screaming inside his head. I need you! I lov...!

He gasped, as if being stabbed.

Do I love you?

In her eyes he searched for the answer.

Did he love, what inevitably belonged to him? Did he love his heart, his mind, his spirit, his soul? Was she not far more than all of that?

Without thinking about what he was doing, without considering it being right, he straightened up in front of her, kneeling firmly on the stump, wrapped his arms around her and kissed her.

His despair faded away before radiating warmth spreading inside him and he kissed her even harder. Then finally he felt her rigidity loosen up, her limps slackened and at last she sank down into his arms.

Her head bumped against his shoulder. Concerned and afraid he looked down at her, breathing heavily. The storm around them settled down, the branches fell to the ground and cautiously he came back to his feet with her in his arms.

She took a deep, calm breath and relief made him tumble. With his left hand he grabbed for her legs and carried her gently back to the ship. Not for one second he averted his gaze from her, as if fearing she could evaporate the moment he looked away.

Yet she lingered, stayed where she was, sleeping, nestled against his chest.

He carried her up the ramp, bedded her gingerly on her pillows and wrapped her in her blankets. Then he let himself fall to ground in front of her bed, panting, put his arms onto his knees for support and let his head drop, exhausted. The fear had robbed him of all strength he had had in him, his heart beat wildly and irregularly.

What had he done? Why was he not able to protect her from her darkness? He had, selfish as he was, needlessly put her in danger. He had never thought something of this sort might occur, that the darkness could be so strong that it would take her away from him.

He shook his head, fighting the tears and ruffling his hair.

It was his fault! He had brought her here! Exposed her!

Jerkily he swung himself to his feet and almost got to the cockpit, yet his steps drifted off again and troubled he began pacing up and down in front of the kitchen. He wrung his hands, cursed under his breath and glanced again and again toward the sleeping creature that had given itself trustfully into his incapable care.

Drowning in self-hatred he rushed outside, stormed up to the trees and screamed with all the force he had his fury into the twilight.

20.

She awoke, when it was already dark outside. Through the back window the stars gleamed down to her, as she tried to remember how she had got back inside the ship. Yet her remembrance tore at the point, where she had sat down onto the tree's stump for meditation.

She swung the blankets aside and sat upright, when a wholly different memory struck her. Her heart began to race and instinctively she put the fingers of her right hand to her lips.

It had been him. He had brought her back. It had been his kiss.

Her chest contracted, only in pain she could breathe and searching she looked around, yet could not see him anywhere. She jumped off her bed and hurried toward the hatchway. The crackling of burning branches reached her ears and flickering light crawled up to her. Looking for him, she cautiously sneaked down the ramp, blinking to every side, yet could neither perceive him in the darkness nor next to the camp fire.

She turned left, gazing up the hill, standing next to the flames. Where should she look for him? Maybe he went to the forest. Or down to the sea. Her heart became heavy with the thought that he had left her all alone and the sudden loneliness coated it with clinging ice.

"Rey", a voice murmured behind her and she spun round.

He came toward her, had apparently sat in the shadows under the ship at the cliff and now stepped into the glow of the flames. He was branded by weariness and guilt, had dark circles underneath his eyes and cuts everywhere in his skin.

"There you are", he breathed relieved and her heart skipped a beat. She hurried forward, yet halted just before him instead of flinging herself around his neck, as her own guilt prevented her from it. He looked as tantalized as she felt.

"I'm sorry", she whispered and then touched his cheek nevertheless, caressed it as he did not hinder her.

"No, I am sorry", he muttered in a rough voice and let his gaze drop to the ground. "I am to blame. I did not see the danger and exposed you to it."

She shook her head vigorously, making her hair beat around her shoulders and then looked at him at an angle, so he could not evade her eyes. "Everything's alright. Honestly. It wasn't your fault. I'd been too careless again."

He looked directly at her, his gaze petrified, seemed unable to forgive himself.

She mustered all her courage, took the last step toward him and put her hands to his sides. He allowed it. She let them wander up his body, across his chest to his shoulders. Then she gasped for air, trembling, stood up on her toes and closed her eyes. Slowly she let her lips get closer to his, praying he would not thrust her away.

His eyes widened before he shut them as well and he lowered his head down to her. Forceful he held her close, just as their lips touched. He buried his hands in her hair and the fabric of her clothes, she put her arms around his neck. For minutes they stood there, panting, could breathe only when the other's kiss permitted it. Then he bent down, put his right arm beneath her bottom and his hand to her thigh. With a mighty jolt he lifted her onto his hips, she wrapped her legs around his body and he carried her up the platform into the ship.

Tenderly he laid her down onto one of the beds and immediately she could smell him all around her. As if he resided already in her heart, her head and her soul.

He ripped his shirt off his body and then ascended over her, buried her in an ocean of kisses.

Safer, she had never felt. As she opened her eyes an invisible wall surrounded her, enclosing everything she loved and shutting out everything that made her feel scared or worried.

She lay amidst a chaos of cuddly soft blankets and her head was bedded on a muscular arm, the hand of which she could perceive to her left. His other arm lay across her, such building the impenetrable protection.

Slowly and cautiously she turned round. Had she looked upon the cliffs beyond the window before, her gaze fell now upon the face that imbued her every thought. Calmly and regularly his chest rose, his breath stroking her skin.

Affectionately she watched his sleep, got drunk on the sight of him, while the first, pale light of the day crept over the island and inside.

At some point his eyelids moved and the long lashes revealed his eyes. They gazed steadily into hers and his arms pulled her closer to him. None of them uttered a word. The waves beat loudly against the rocks and the birds called from inside their nests.

After what felt like hours he moved his protecting arm and gently caressed her face.

"Good morning", he whispered and kissed her forehead.

"Morning", she mumbled back and a pleasant shiver ran down her spine.

He sat up and onto the bottom edge of the bed.

"Hungry?", he asked with a loving glance back.

"Yes", she whispered and stretched sleepily, while he got up, put his trousers back on and went over into the kitchen.

She wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and climbed out of bed, left her clothes lying on the floor and went over to her closet to look for new ones. She put on simple, tight jeans, threw the blanket back onto the bed and, having her back turned to the kitchen, pulled a comfortable shirt over her head. Then she disappeared into the bathroom for a few minutes, did not even bother to tame her hair and helped him preparing breakfast, touching each other again and again, letting their shoulders bump into one another or kissing.

With heavily laden plates they went outside, shivering slightly in the fresh morning air. Yet this could do them no harm. The warmth inside their bodies kept away the cold.

The almost died out ambers still smouldered in the fireplace. They left it unregarded, climbed up the hill for a few feet, to be able to savour the view onto the sea and sat down on the still dew and spray wet grass.

They felt the wind on their skin, the power of the sun and were as free as they had never been in their lives.

Then quiet hissing sounded and engines roared and he straightened up, aghast, sat as if he had received a blow.

"Kyren?", she asked. "What is that?"

The howling grew louder and they could make out small, black specks at the horizon which seemed to be shooting in their direction.

Fear took hold of her.

"No, that... that...", he stammered terrified and all colour left his face. "Run!", he shouted. "Run to the ship. We have to get away from here!"

She reacted instantly, as they had discussed it many times, ran down the hill, had him close behind her to take care she would not fall.

But before they could even reach their ship they saw that the specks were in fact unknown space crafts. And they began firing at them.

The shots hit the rocks, crashed into their own ship and smashed the window panes.

"Onto the ground", he yelled and without hesitation she obeyed, flung herself into the grass next to him to escape the following attacks.

Yet their aggressors did not fly past the island in order to launch a renewed assault, but landed at the coast and on top of the hill. The shots had served the mere purpose of preventing them to leave, they realised, they had not been meant to kill them at all.

They encircled the two.

"No", he panted and helped her getting to her feet. "How did they find us?" Despair took hold of him and he pushed her forward.

"Go! Quickly, into the ship. They came for me!"

She ran off, but looked back over her shoulder again and again, as he only followed her at a distance.

"Kyren, come on, please!"

She reached the ramp and chased into the ship, wanted to wait for him before closing the hatch.

Through the window she now saw six black clad figures swarm the island accompanied by even more, white soldiers. With their masklike helmets, they looked like him, came out of every direction. Holding firearms or weapons for combat.

He yelled something at them, where upon they started arguing. She felt sure they had been sent here by this so called First Order and had come to take him back. Seemingly he tried to negotiate, but the discussion became fiercer and they closed in on him. They threatened him with their weapons and he prepared to resist this predominance.

"No", she breathed, shivering. Then he reached out with his hand and only seconds later an object came zooming towards him, which, if she considered the way it came, must have been lying underneath the ship at the cliffs. He caught it and in that same moment it transformed into a weapon, a sword that gleamed like the light of the sun itself. And as red as raging flames.

With the sword held high, he ran towards the first attackers, parried their attacks, deflected shots and brought some of them down. More and more figures stormed towards the one warrior.

In a desperate desire to help, she spun round to the hatch, yet had not even taken two steps forward as two masked and black cloaked strangers came up the ramp, looking around the ship.

As they discovered her, they called out to one another, words, which she did not understand and brandished their weapons. These being pointed at her, they came closer and she stumbled backwards against the pilot's chair.

Her staff stood at the back wall and she made it fly to her by using the Force. Ready to fight she aimed with her weapon at the two invaders.

Apparently bewildered the strangers halted, deliberated shortly and then stormed towards her, one of them carrying a lance, which's point flickered with electric discharges, and the other one armed with two long, saber-like swords.

She parried the blow of the spear, beat it aside with sparks flying through the air and made its carrier tumble several steps backwards. Then the first sword sped at her side and she could only just evade its blade. The second one she made rebound at her staff in front of her face. Adept and much more agile in combat than she was, the stranger simply spun in a circle to launch another attack. She searched for the Force around the swords, tore them aside, so they would not strike her and thrust their carrier away from her. There the first stranger dashed forth again, aiming at her with his lance and she ducked to avoid it. That assault however had only been meant as a distraction, for now the masked man punched her uncovered side with something she could not make out. Instantly she swayed on the spot, her legs gave way and she fell painfully to her knees.

Satisfied by what he had done, the stranger pulled a syringe out of her skin and let the empty phial shatter on the floor. His colleague wrenched her staff out of her hands, put away his swords and grabbed roughly for her arms.

Again words she could not understand, then the stranger lifted her off the ground, carried her, accompanied by the spearman, out of the ship. Whatever it was, they had injected her, it had completely dazed her. She could not feel her body anymore, did not know if she still owned one at all, yet did not pass out. Instead she had to witness the two strangers carrying her onto the plateau, obviously threatening him to kill her, for as he perceived her having fallen hostage to them, the lance was being held to her throat and he lowered his lightsaber.

A heap of killed opponents lay to his feet, yet now the remaining strangers overpowered him, took his sword and rammed a shot in his skin just the same.

Thus numbed, the black clothed soldiers took him and her with them, abducted them onto their own ships and flew off into the endless darkness of space.

21.

In pain and mustering all strength that was available to her, she managed to open her eyes. Just a bit. From somewhere, glaring light fell down on her and dark silhouettes moved blurred from one side of her narrow vision to the other.

Words were spoken, then some retorted, people argued, then harshly disputed. She did not understand.

Instead her sight became clearer. She now realised that she was standing and that figures were pacing up and down in front of her. The sound of thundering steps came to her ears and revealed to her that somebody kept watch behind her as well.

She assumed that they were the same strangers who had attacked him and herself on the island. They all wore black. And still heavy helmets beneath their hoods.

One of them started yelling at her, yet the words made no sense whatsoever.

He seemed to expect her to say something. But she would refuse. For that she stayed silent, staring into the dark in front of her as expressionless as she could.

Once again something incomprehensible.

Then a reply.

Somebody slammed something onto her head, covering her ears. She wanted to fight it, found an arm in the diffuse feeling inside her body. But she could not lift it. Was that still because of the stuff they had injected her? That she could not feel her body?

"You will never be able to free yourself from these restraints", the man across from her spoke and she gave a start, as she could understand him now. A thin cord ran from underneath his helmet to a small object he pinned to the mouthpiece and which could only be a microphone. She assumed that the device had to be a translation instrument linked to the one they had put around her head.

"I see you are able to understand me now. Good, for I got a few questions to ask you, to which I would be elated to get to know the answers."

Her thoughts became clearer only slowly, but she could take in more details now. She had been tied to something that kept her upright and was positioned in the middle of a small, round room. She could see no door, guessed therefore that one had to be behind her. Maybe five or six of these black clothed strangers prowled around her, while their spokesman stayed before her scrutinizing her.

"So tell me, girl: Who are you?", it spoke behind the mask.

She pressed her lips together to show him that he would not receive even a single information from her.

"Beat her", he ordered without hesitation and another one let a whip slash down upon her. Instantly the rope tore a deep wound into her arm and a scream burst out of her lungs.

"Your name, girl."

Another blow, when she did not speak, across her upper body. Yet she remained persistent.

"Maybe this will convince you?"

The hooded man pressed a button on a device he held in his hand and only moments later the chamber echoed with screams which were carried to them through loudspeakers. And they were his screams.

"No", she panted and jolted forward in her restraints.

"How nicely this always works", the stranger noted and the others began to laugh silently and gleefully. "Who are you?"

She bit her teeth.

"Rey", she only uttered in a rough tone.

"Very well, Rey", the voice dripped with false kindness. "There is no reason, to oppose us, for we do not want to harm you. Quite the opposite: We value you and your abilities. For that we regret it immensely that your existence has been withheld from us and we would like to get to know the reason, why."

She stayed silent, franticly thinking about what to say, but her brain worked too slowly. His screams rang inside her skull.

"I don't know, why", she answered quickly and again his voice sounded through the loudspeakers. Tears ran down her cheeks, bursting at her feet.

"Why were you kept secret from us?"

"Stop it", she cried, but to no effect and as she did not say another word, they beat her head with such force that she fainted.

Again her gaze fell upon the black mask.

"For what did Kylo want to use your abilities?", they continued the interrogation as if it had never been interrupted. "To take sole control over the First Order? With the aid of your powers? Or through the mere strengthening of his own?"

She however felt stronger, did not even listen, but concentrated as hard as she could on the weapon of one of the guards and finally she felt it.

She yanked it out of his hand, made it zoom through the room, hoping it might strike someone dead.

"Stun her!", the stranger roared. "Stun her!"

Once more something was injected into her flesh and she felt her newly regained powers fade.

"That is enough! She still needs to be able to talk!"

Her torturer built himself up to his full height and placed his free hand, shrouded in black leather, on her throat. His masked face came that close to hers, that she should have been able to feel his breath.

His fingers wandered across her neck, increasing the pressure onto her veins for a moment.

"Impressive", the figure murmured and slapped her face. "You would be a true enrichment to the Knights of Ren and the First Order. Together we could achieve anything. Anything at all."

She spat onto the black tinted glass that concealed his eyes and gazed as disdainfully as she could.

Beside himself, he smashed the device against her temple.

"Insolent brat", his voice greeted her, hissing.

She opened her eyes, her right one being matted by something. Probably her own blood. As if she had continuously pondered his words in her sleep, they echoed still inside her head. 'Kylo', with that he must have meant 'Kyren'. But what did 'sole control' mean? Unease befell her that had nothing to do with the interrogation and that she could not explain to herself.

"I am afraid, my patience with you is getting to its end", the stranger murmured threateningly. "Kylo Ren's treason against the Knights of Ren is obvious, nevertheless are we dependent on our master's abilities and is the First Order of its commander, as you can imagine. Alas, he presents himself less than ready to cooperate, which does not allow us to be this pleasant anymore. Unless...", he interrupted himself and leaned closely in on her, placing his hands left and right her face for support, "you would grace the Knights of Ren by joining them."

Disgusted by him being so close and by the words he spoke she shook her head. The unease inside her however turned to certainty and her eyes widened, were filled with tears. Did he lie to her?

He seemed to scrutinize her closely, seemed to understand.

"You did not know", he sounded almost pitiful, if it had not been for the triumph she could make out in every poisonous word of his. "He let you stay in the dark about who he is."

She wanted to block out what she had heard, to shield herself from it, but it felt as if a long feared truth was confirmed.

"About the fact, that Kylo Ren, as master of the most powerful warriors of this galaxy and as commander and co-originator of the First Order, is responsible for this war, responsible for hundreds of deaths, responsible for overthrowing powers."

Unexpectedly he stepped back.

"I ask you one last time: Are you willing to join the Knights of Ren?"

Vigorously she shook her head, yet could not make a sound.

At the same moment the stranger gave a sigh to one of the guards and the man came to a halt, towering in front of her.

"Rape her!"

The soldier grabbed her shirt and tore it apart.

She screamed, that her throat was threatening to burst and her spirit fled into dark tunnels, as a force started rushing through her which she had never felt before, but of which she was not surprised that it existed. On the contrary. It seemed to her as if she should have always known it was there. This Force broke free of her, lashed about and as she opened her eyes again her enemies lay slain on the ground.

No longer dazed she bent her restraints with just a glace. She tied the torn shirt around her chest and took a firearm of one of the guards as well as a spear. With flashing lights and apparently demanding a code the lock to the door had been installed to its right. She shot at it with the blaster and the door opened up, hissing. It released her out into a once again circular room in the middle of which stood a large table and several doors were set in its walls that presumably led to further cells. White clothed guards stood before each of them, yet were so astonished by her sudden appearance that she had already shot three of them before the remaining two moved towards her at all. Led by that new strength, she overpowered them effortlessly.

The silence setting in seemed crushing. Breathing hard she stood there, shoulders trembling, restlessly raising and lowering themselves and her wounds pounded painfully. Her spirit however came slowly to rest. The raging wrath stepped aside to despair, deception and abuse. Lies, nothing but lies piled on top of one another and the depth beneath her was as black as it had never been.

"Rey", someone screamed and she whirled round, saw him running towards her. He carried his sword and panted just as she did.

"What happened? What have they done to y...?, she interrupted him by pointing her spear at him. That forced him to halt and rubbed him off his words.

"Rey?", he merely breathed and looked at her, stunned.

Her gaze blurred with tears and furious with herself she wiped them away. Furious to have trusted blindly. Furious to never have asked any questions.

"I know it. I know everything", she spat at him and he flinched with every word as if receiving blow after blow. "I know who you are", she screamed.

"KYLO REN!"

He stumbled backwards. She came towards him, still threatening him with her weapon.

"Admit it!", she demanded. "You made me believe you were nothing more than a repressed gear of this machinery! When in fact you are its builder! Founder of the First Order, commander of its troops! You wage this war! You kill innocent people and destroy their home!"

"Rey, wait", he began and raised his hands to calm her down. "I can explain it to you, if you let me. It would not free me off my blame, however I want you to hear it."

She however did not listen.

"And you brought me here, out of pure selfishness. To be able to direct me and by that regaining your power."

"Yes, I did", he did not even try to talk himself out of it, "but I..." He came no further, for she made the weapon gain momentum.

Blinded she let the spear come down on him. Yet it went right through him without even touching him. She almost lost her balance and let go of the staff in horror. Horrified that she had indeed tried to hurt him and that she did not succeed in doing so, even though the spear should have hit him.

He seemed just as amazed and looked at her perplexed.

"An illusion", he whispered and stepped towards her in haste. She retreated, yet could not shake him off, had a wall behind her back and seconds later they stood facing each other. Just like they had, so many weeks before, immersed in the other's presence, yearning for the other to be close."

He raised his arm and gently touched her cheek, before evaporating before her eyes.

Broken, she sank to the floor, cried and sobbed as she began to understand. Her despair, his fury had found one another, to free each other from agony. Yet she had yielded.

His torturers' bodies collided crashing with the walls. His restraints dislodged under the influence of the Force and he made a spear zoom towards him, with which he stabbed his former subordinates. Hurriedly he keyed in the code of the cell's door which luckily no one had changed during his absence and stormed out into the anteroom. He recognized it as the one of cell number 37, yet could not see anything that could give him a clue to where she was held captive. Five more guards now ran at him. On the table his sword lay, useless to anybody but himself. Relieved, they had not destroyed it yet, he let it come to him, ignited the blade. With just a flick of his hand he sent his opponents into unconsciousness and then rammed his sword into their bodies.

The spear he left behind and ran through the narrow tunnel out into the corridor of the prison tract. Panicking he turned left, checking every cell on his way.

Then, finally, he found her. She stood in a sideways leading passage, panting, armed and looking completely upset. Immediately he ran towards her, stunned that she had managed to free herself and relieved that she seemed to be alright.

As she stood there, she appeared fully different to the girl, he had seen for the first time so many months before. To the girl, he had mistrusted, the girl who had obtained his compassion, the girl who had been completely unaware of the powers that had lain dormant inside her.

Yes, he had wanted to steer her. Had wanted to bring her onto the path of the light, so the dankness would bestow its faith upon him alone. Yet he had not accounted for so many things. That the Force was unpredictable, that it carved out its own paths, that the light would find him and that the sight of her alone would suffice to make him forget the darkness.

She, for whom he would give his life, turned to him and only seconds later he found himself being threatened by her weapon. Fully justified so. Justified she yelled at him, justified she despised him, justified she let her spear come down on him.

Which did not hurt him though, which's blow he did not feel. And he understood.

Longing to be close to her, he went toward her, even though she tried to evade him and caressed her cheek, tried to put all his affection into the touch.

And she disappeared.

At once he ran back to the corridor he had come from, clearing his way, searching for her and finally he saw her hurrying out of one of the cells' entrances.

Her gaze found him as well, as he leaned panting to a wall.

Fear he could perceive in her eyes as he ran to her. Yet she let herself be pulled into his embrace, held onto him and buried her face at his shoulder.

With tears streaming down her face and only armed with the blaster, she ran out of the room and into a long tunnel. It did not matter, where it would lead her to, as she had to try to leave this place no matter what.

She reached a seemingly endless passage, could hear nothing and see nobody. She allowed her spirit to meander through a dark world, as interlacing as a labyrinth.

Then someone stormed round a corner to her right and she readied herself for the attack. Then however, she realised that it was him, panting and holding on to the wall with one hand. His eyes found her and without hesitation he came to her.

For a moment she feared he might want to fight her, yet he dropped his sword and while still running reached out for her with his arms.

Her weapon fell and she let herself be pulled into his embrace.

22.

"I am so sorry", he whispered again and again, swaying softly from one side to the other, to make her calm down. "I am sorry."

"I would have killed you", she sobbed, could not bear that he did not condemn her, even though she hated herself for it. "Would I have had the chance, I would have killed you."

"And I would have deserved it", he murmured, laid his cheek onto her hair. "For not having been honest with you, for making you a tool of my purpose and for putting you in danger."

"No, you wouldn't", she muffled her voice at his chest.

He stroked her back, gripped her even harder, before disengaging the embrace.

"We get out of here, come", he said calmly, dabbing away her tears and he took her hand. "This way." They picked up their weapons and he ran ahead, leading her by the hand through unnumbered, tangled passage ways, in which she would have been lost, had she been on herself.

A squad of soldiers blocked their way. Lurching they came to a halt, jumped head first into a different corridor to take cover, as the warriors of the First Order began shooting at them. Only for a moment they drew breath, concentrated on the Force and then confronted the soldiers. They made the shots bounce off of them, led them to ricochet against the walls or back at their shooters. One after the other sank to the ground, until only one of them still remained.

He held forth his arm, which caused the soldier to stand frozen on the spot. He was not able to move anymore, could no longer speak.

"You will report that you have seen us running towards the bridge", he spoke however, staring fixedly at the attacker's helmet. "We are on our way to eliminate the general", he growled and let go of the man. The moment, he could move by himself again, he ran back down the corridor he had come from, yelling the enemies were on their way up to the bridge.

"But we...", she whispered, took his hand again and together they turned into the opposite direction.

"Are not on our way to the bridge, of course. Probably they will figure that out soon enough, but until then we can cause a little damage."

They ran on, deeper and deeper into the guts of that gigantic battleship, killed everybody, who came across their path and finally stopped at an enormous, armoured door.

"What are we doing here?", she murmured and tried to breathe steadily.

"From the pillars in this room the ship gains the energy for its shields", he whispered and keyed in the combination to the computer, to make the door slide open. A loud buzzing sounded, concealing their words and steps.

"Give me some cover, I am going to destroy the generators", he said and dashed into the room. For a moment she hesitated, as a bad feeling crawled up her body, but then ran after him.

There was nothing of interest to see in the vast room, except for broad, blue glowing pillars that caused the noise. They stood in the centre, surrounded by a high railing and at the walls more soldiers stood guard. Two of them he had already killed, as the attention of the others now turned to him. One man she stunned, so he could slay him. The three remaining began to shoot at them across the room.

She diverted the shots back to the soldiers, so he could destroy the pillars, unharmed. One she wounded deadly, another however hit an alert button on the wall. A piercing howl made the walls shake and she halted in shock. At the same moment the lights of the generators extinguished, as he smashed them. Lightning erupted, flickered through the room, striking one of the guards.

One last bolt hurled down to her and she held out her arm to avert it. Its force pushed her to the ground and her arm became numb. She let go off her blaster, grabbing for her hurting arm with her uninjured hand. Then the last soldier stood before her, aiming with his own blaster at her chest. Unable to do anything else, she gave in to her fate.

The man pulled the trigger as he came rushing to them from behind. His sword penetrated the soldier's back as the shot sounded and broke through his chest. The killed sank to the floor and he dashed to her.

"Did he hit you?", he called anxious and supported her shoulders so she would not fall.

"Side", he panted with gritted teeth. She pressed her still functioning right hand to her left side, at which her numb arm hung down.

"Damn", he cursed, growling and helped her to stand up, putting additional pressure onto her side with his own hand.

"Are you able to run? We still got a bit to go", he said and she nodded shortly. Then they turned into a run, left the room and followed the corridor. "We head for the rescue capsules."

The sounds of their steps on the metal floor and the howling of sirens were joined by the thundering of what seemed to be hundreds of boots. He left the main corridors, twined through smaller passages, in which their foes would hopefully not expect them in.

"Not far now, not far now", he whispered again and again, yet could not prevent them from running into a squat of soldiers time and again. Those he tried to lose inside the maze of convoluted corridors or to influence with the Force to make them ignore them. Nonetheless their pursuers kept close to them and they could hear shots crashing into walls they had passed only seconds before.

Suddenly the whole ship took a great jolt that flung them off their feet. Wanting to intercept her fall he let go of his sword, landed awkwardly on his shoulder and let out a muffled scream. Yet he came back to his feet, staggering forward.

"The shoulder is dislocated", he panted, grabbed his sword and clung onto his injured arm.

"What was that?", she asked just as breathless. Again she could hear steps behind them, fortunately however further off than moments before. As if wanting to stress her words, a renewed quake made the floor tremble. This time though, they only swayed for a moment, were able to stand their ground.

"That is an assault", he replied. "We destroyed the shields, so now they can be attacked."

"I see", she breathed.

"We are almost there", he said while they turned more corners, yet finally he threw himself against a wall with his back to peer cautiously into the passage lying behind it. Once again there was a great burst, more violent than those before which forced them onto their knees and the lights above them started to flicker. It was followed by more and more assaults and she assumed that the ship was now under constant bombardment.

"Very good", he growled and helped her to her feet. "We have to try. A few guards are still with the capsules, but in this chaos we might be able to get past them."

They ran out into the corridor and towards a gigantic room, in the walls of which lay the entrances to the capsules. Shots sounded, in front as well as behind them, as the first soldiers inside the hall discovered them and others caught up with them from behind.

Yet they missed, as the shaking of the floor and walls did not seize. She turned round, taking her bloody hand off her side and deflecting the shots off of them.

"The first one, take the first one", he called, as they entered the room, built himself up in front of her to shield her while running still, parried the shots and deflected them back towards their attackers as good as he could.

Under his protection and thus of the wall next to her, she climbed in pain into the first rescue capsule. He moved backwards towards her, concentrated upon the shots that rushed at them from every angle.

She held her outstretched hand out of the capsule's entrance and toward the room. He perceived the movement and understood at once. She would deflect the shots so he could decent as well and start the engine. Sparks glimmered all around the capsule, for she could only muster enough strength to hurl the shots a few feet to the sides. The moment he reached the inside of the capsule, he pressed a button next to the door which caused the hatch to close.

"Let us be gone", he panted and with a punch onto the designated control, dislodged the capsule off its embedding.

Still they were fired at, but the room became more and more distant as they shot down a tunnel until nothing surrounded them anymore but the eternal blackness of space.

Astonished they stared at the mighty space ship, as big as whole cities and at the countless smaller ones that zoomed around it like flies, shooting at or defending it. Far beyond they could make out huge bombers that let their ammunitions rain unceasingly upon the giant.

"Those are the Resistance fighters of the Republic", he breathed relieved, yet turned to her at once as she sank against a wall. Without a word he opened a drawer next to the miniscule control table and pulled a bag out of it. That contained bandages, band-aids, pliers, tweezers and things she had never seen before, which however seemed to be meant for quick aid. Being able only to use his left arm fully, he pressed a role of bandages to her wound and together they put a second one around her body.

"What if they're gonna shoot at us as well?", the fear, that the shots of battleships had to be more devastating than those of blasters, did not let go of her.

"Shhhhh...", he said. "They will not, we are not even on their radars. And pursuers they would shoot, I hope."

Her sight became blurred as the loss of blood began to demanded its tribute.

"Your arm", he murmured and felt for her left arm, which she did not feel.

"Numb", she said toneless, kept concentrating on staying conscious.

"Damn", he cursed, realising he could not do anything else for her and instead turned his attention to his own shoulder. He put his left hand to it, leading the joint partly with his grip and partly with the Force until an ugly cracking sounded, his shoulder however seemed to be relocated to its original spot.

"Ah", he panted in pain and shut his eyes.

She reached out with her hand for his, to reassure him off her comfort and he took it, caressing the back of it with his thumb.

"Please, hang in there", he murmured. "Where ever we land, someone there will be able to help you."

She said nothing, breathed heavily and looked into his eyes. He seemed to understand anyway.

23.

"Where are w... ah", she had to break off her sentence, as she tried to sit upright too rashly and a sharp pain rushed through her side.

"Slowly", she recognised his voice and immediately his hands placed themselves onto her shoulders, supporting them gently until she lay again on her pillows. "At safety, for the time being. On a planet with the name of Okraidan-Unita."

"Aha", she sighed as the pain grew fainter. To her left he sat on the edge of her bed and looked down upon her, tired, shaken, but just as relieved.

"Now they patched you back together", he reminded her of her own sentence of weeks before. "And they also had a look at your arm. The blow has paralysed its nervous system. Yet they assume it will recover again."

"Hmm", she said and tried to raise her left arm which was placed in a sling. But it did not obey.

She looked back up at him.

"How is your shoulder?"

He also had a splint around his arm.

"Good", he said and shrugged with his unharmed one. "That splint they put on just to be sure."

"What a relief", she whispered and she succeeded in relaxing her body a bit. "But what are we gonna do now?", she asked and her gaze became more sinister. "Did someone recognise you?"

Her heart began to race wildly as it hit her that he had to be one of the most wanted men of this galaxy.

As if he had guessed what she was thinking about, he leaned in on her and spoke that silently, that even she could hardly understand him.

"I am really sorry, never to have told you the truth his whole time", he murmured and she could see in his eyes that it tormented him to speak about it. "Yes, I have served the First Order, alongside the Knights of Ren, with all I had to give, when I thought its goals to be the right ones. And I have pursued its opponents, fought them and killed them. After all, with the powers I had, no one could stand in my way."

He did not varnish, which shocked her on the one hand, but on the other one it felt reassuring. For only then could she understand what situation he was in. And with him herself as well.

"Yet this power faded as doubts came. Taking over is one thing, subjugation another. And by that the Force came to you."

He took a pause, in which he seemed to look at every detail of her expression.

"I thought that if I showed you the way to the light, the darkness would return to me and I could then lead the First Order the way I presumed to be the right one. But this plan did not work out as well and in consequence I have put you into unnecessary danger, have dragged you into this war and for that, I will be sorry eternally."

She placed her uninjured hand to his cheek, caressed it and stroke through his hair.

"That is quite alright", she whispered and the next second felt his lips upon her own. They kissed for a long time, before he let go again.

"Thank you", he murmured tenderly and let his lips wander across her forehead. "Still I am afraid, that even if the Resistance should now shatter the First Order, they will hunt me down."

"But maybe they assume you being dead. Assume that you did not survive the assault on the ship. As long as nobody recognises you and gives you away, you'd be free."

"That would be too good to be true", he confessed and lowered his gaze down to her blanket. "I already had to control the doctors and that squad of soldiers that had awaited the arriving capsule. So they would believe without questions that we were escaping prisoners of the First Order, who had managed to get away during the attack."

"That wasn't a lie", she said, smiling slightly.

"No, it was not", he admitted. "But normally they would have had to be much stricter. After all, we are currently on territory of the republic Resistance. At no place where we could harm their cause, but I still cannot wait to get away from here."

"Well then. What are we waiting for?", she asked and set up a bit the best she could to indicate her willingness for immediate departure.

Worried, he looked at her.

"Are you sure you should travel again already? Do you not want to get a bit more rest?"

"No", she said, shaking her head. "I can mend on the way just as well. Wouldn't do us any good to stay and risk coming across someone who knows who you are."

"Well, if you are sure about it. Then we just have to get our hands on a ship. The capsule will never be able to get us back to Ahch-To."

"Do you have any money?", she asked and let herself he helped to her feet.

"Just the little that had been put into the capsule for emergencies. The rest I will probably stay in dept with."

After they had left the ward, they made their way to a sales market for space ships. To not fully plunder the poor merchant he deliberately picked no recent model and paid at least the main part of its price with the little money they had and the capsule. The merchant would never know he missed the rest.

It was no especially comfortable journey back to the small planet that almost felt like a second home. Yet after just one day they perceived the cloudy surface of Ahch-To, searched in the confusion of islands for the one they had trained on and found it after a while.

The First Order had left it just the way they had found it. The ship still stood at its spot, towering above the waves like a lone watcher.

It felt as if they had been gone for years which could have been only a few days, as they entered the inside of the ship. Everything was as it had been in the moment they had been kidnapped: their clothes inside the closets, the blankets laying in a mess on the beds and the kitchen waiting for them with breakfast.

Sighing he let himself fall onto the pilot's chair, put down the hilt of his sword between the countless controls on the table.

"It is a shame they hit it that hard", he whispered and let his fingers wander over the different buttons of which most had lost their lights. "It had been a really nice ship. But probably it would attract too much attention anyway."

He turned to her.

"I suggest we let this one sink onto the ocean's ground so it will not give anyone the hint that we have been here and then buy a different one. Replace the new one by a more comfortable one."

"So you don't wanna stay here?", she gathered from his words and sat down next to him.

He shook his head. "Should the Resistance take prisoners and learn from them that we had been attacked here, they are bound to come and look for us. So I think it would be best we looked for a new hideout, where no one expects us to be and where no one bothers us."

"Would be best", she agreed and immediately they started gathering their belongings and put them into the rusty space ship.

After that they lifted their temporary home into the waves that closed greedily around it and dragged it in a close embrace into the tides.

Together they flew to the planet Jakku. It was covered by one vast desert, yet still daring people had settled there and even sold reasonable space ships. After having decided on a new one, their journey took them on to a planet named Yklar, where between trees and meadows traversed by streams and rivers they put up their new camp.

The planet did not seem to be densely populated, which confused her. After all it seemed to be profitable and as such seemed to promise a comfortable living.

"Well, there is just one problem", he said grinning as she told him of her suspicion. "Those woods are home to wild beasts and monstrous creatures that are close to immune to normal weapons. That is why most inhabitants decided at one point to leave Yklar." He glazed at her challengingly. "Do you think we can handle that?"

She had to laugh, rolled her eyes.

"Yes, I think so."

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