a/n;; first story. : not the first thing i've written, though. reviews - please keep them at least polite? thanks!
She'd been holed up in the small house for so long – it seemed like it had been years since she'd seen pure, unfiltered sunlight. With no one for company but James and the small life growing inside of her, Lily Evans – now Potter – felt like she was slowly, torturously going insane. The newly formed Potter family, soon to be of three, had been in hiding for almost four months, now, and Lily barely left the house, except for on the rare occasion when she went out to buy food or other such goods, and even then only in disguise and accompanied by James.
Lily loved her husband, she truly did, and she didn't blame him for being worried about her, cautious over letting her out of his site, but it was getting slightly excessive. When out in public, no matter how heavily disguised the Polyjuice Potion had made them, he was constantly touching her, a hand on her waist or her shoulder or her hip or her neck. No matter where they went, how long they were there, he constantly maintained contact with her, as if scared that the minute they lost that physical bond, she would disappear in a puff of smoke.
At home, times were easier. He allowed her more space, knowing they were safer, but he did like to be with earshot as much as possible, constantly keeping and eye out or his ears perked, just in case. Sometimes, Lily even found herself looking forward to the full moon, anticipating the night every month that she would have to herself, to relax and refresh without James, but more often then not, she found herself crying quietly in her bed, missing the constant, comforting present of her husband lurking in the other room.
When her husband was home, she found herself avoiding him, desperate to get some fresh air outside of their stale house. She was prone to snapping quickly and shooting off sharp, biting comments, to which James would either respond with his own in turn, or reach out and smooth her hair with one hand, kissing her forehead and effectively soothing her, enough so she might melt into his arms and rest her cheek on his shoulder, her pregnant belly a barrier between them. Yet, sometimes, when she pushed he would go, whether it was merely into another room or upstairs, leaving her feeling bitter, lonely, and with a sickening satisfaction in the pit of her stomach.
The Potter house was thick with tension, the air so heavy it was suffocating at times. They both liked to chalk it up to pregnancy hormones, blaming it on something that couldn't be helped, but Lily couldn't help but wonder, sometimes, if maybe it went deeper than that. But, thankfully, Remus and Sirius had saved them, at least for the day. They had dropped by for a visit for a few hours. Peter had visited the week before, and, unfortunately, was tied up with something today. But even one other human being was enough for Lily. Remus was her calming factor, making her feel like a person again, rather than a raging monster who pushed away everyone she loved. Even now, merely standing at the counter with her, sipping chamomile tea, he was relaxing her, by just letting her sit in the silence knowing that she didn't have to say something, but could if she needed.
Sirius was currently upstairs with James, and, though their words were indecipherable, the sound of their laughter was ringing clearly through the house, chasing away all the bad air and negative feelings. A soft smile played on the sole female's lips at the sound of her husband's happiness, a sound that had started to become less and less familiar as tension rose, "the end of the seventh month" approaching, as well as the unborn child's due date. But all worries had been banished for the time being, the only sounds those of Remus's soft breathing, and Sirius and James's playful noises as they clamored around the house. The din reverberated quietly around the couple in the kitchen, but Remus and Lily were in a world of their own, silently enjoying each other's company.
The peace was quickly broken, though, as Lily uttered a sharp gasp, her teacup clattering to the ground and shattering into a million pieces. Her face froze for a minute, full of shock, before, suddenly, she was sobbing hysterically, one hand caught over her mouth, the other desperately clutching her stomach.
"Lily!" The cry came from Remus, who immediately slammed down his own cup, rushing to her side, quickly taking her arm. "JAMES!" came the next yell, unnecessary as James was already flying down the stairs, having heard the breaking china. The soon-to-be father came careening through the house to rush to Lily's side, Sirius quick on his heels, the former only barely managing to quickly skid to a halt in front of his wife.
"Oh, God, Lily," he uttered lowly, his voice full of concern. "What's wrong, baby, what's wrong?" With one hand he smoothed her hair back, the other resting warmly on her arm. She continued sobbing for a minute, only pausing to hiccup loudly and reach out to snatch his wrist, yanking his hand away from her hair, planting it firmly on her stomach, where hers had been. Slowly, he paused, and then looked up at her, oddly hushed and awed. Sirius and Remus were frozen around them, hardly daring to breathe. Had something gone wrong with the baby? Was something wrong with Lily? With James now, too? When James's voice came next, it was softer, quieter, wonderstruck. "Lily, is that…?" His voice trailed off, leaving the question unvoiced, but she answered it with a watery smile.
"Can you feel it?" she whispered, her voice hoarse intimate. James nodded slowly, sinking to his knees and placing both hands gently on her belly, his gaze raising from her stomach to her face. "He's kicking," she whispered again, the hand still clasped over her mouth barely containing the wide smile behind it. And abruptly James was crying, too, silent tears slipping down his face as he kissed her bump, pressing his cheek to feel the baby restlessly fussing inside of her.
It was as if nothing else mattered, in that moment, James's cheek pressed to Lily's stomach, Remus and Sirius standing in the background, Sirius grinning widely and Remus's faint smile evident on his scarred face. All of their past troubles and fights melted away, leaving nothing but pure bliss, euphoria at this small life, this every day miracle. Slowly, James got back to his feet, leaning in to press a tender kiss to Lily's lips, which she responded to with a smile and an adoring look.
Sirius was the first to break the silence, slapping James's back in congratulations, with a playful, "Good on you, mate!" Remus laughed softly, leaning in to press a kiss to Lily's forehead, whispering, "Congratulations, flower." James grinned, Lily beamed, and Sirius stepped forwards to wrap his best mate's wife in a crushing hug, resting his chin on her head. "Happy for you, Red," he announced, marveling how even he could feel the soft fluttering from her belly on his toned abdomen, as he squeezed her tightly to him. Remus reached towards James, shaking his hand powerfully and pulling him into a manly embrace, both grinning and clapping each other on the back, and soon the three men were laughing, and Lily was the only one left crying, happy tears streaking down her cheeks.
Slowly, afternoon gave way to evening, with behavior consisting of more of the same. Celebrations had begun, the stocks of firewhiskey pulled out for the boys and a new pot of tea put on the stove for Lily. Eventually, after many congratulations and much more laughter than there had been in a long time, evening gave way to late night, and Remus and Sirius left for their respective apartments. James and Lily were finally alone and, while the baby had stopped kicked long ago, the rest of the night passed peacefully, with James softly pressing feather light kisses and brushing fingertips lovingly over Lily's face, her hair, her stomach.
Quiet rejoicing lasted late into the night, coupled with silent kisses and compassionate moments, with flesh pressed the flesh and wide-eyed, longing looks. It was the first time in a long time that there hadn't been some sort of spat, no matter how small, and the only time that Lily could remember that they stayed in bed past noon the next day, lazily cuddling and sharing secrets smiles, whisper soft words floating over fluffed, white pillows. The entire house was relatively tranquil for the following week and even later days afterwards, with peace descending on the couple each time Lily felt the now familiar jolt in her stomach, the light pounding of the child inside.
The only noise that reached above a whisper the entire week was laughter, the only tears shed those of happiness, of wonder. And suddenly, it didn't matter so much anymore that they were trapped inside the house, or that danger might lurk behind every corner. It didn't matter that they couldn't escape one another or that James might reach out to brush the back of his hand over her arm at any point in time. Nothing could go wrong, and everything was right, and for a short while, their world was perfect.