I don't own Harry Potter, or any of the relating characters.

'Finally!' Vernon huffed, helping himself to a donut from a basket on the table 'That awful boy is gone!'

Petunia nodded, craning her neck to look out of the window so she could see what the neighbors were doing across the street. They, apparently, were just sipping lemonade whilst sitting on chairs in their front yard, but at any moment they could do something different.

Just then Dudley walked into the kitchen, yawning. He stared at the donuts for a second, his piggy eyes bulging with glee, and then he grabbed a handful and started to eat. 'Morning my Diddykins!' Petunia cooed. Dudley nodded at her, and then he let out a muffled cry, spewing crumbs all over the clean kitchen table. 'What is it?' Vernon asked gruffly, taking a sip deeply from his checkered mug. Dudley lifted a pudgy shaking finger and pointed to the window behind Petunia. She turned around and gasped. An owl was trying to get in. In broad daylight. Where the neighbors could see it!

'Don't let it in!' Vernon said curtly 'It probably has a stupid message.'

'But what will the neighbors say if they notice it?!' Petunia shrieked, and she let it in. It was a very pretty owl, but it seemed to have a bit of dirt on it, and it landed on Dudley's head, dropping grime everywhere.

'Get it offa me! I don't like birds! Get it off, get it off NOW!' Dudley shrieked, waving his arms around like a madman, ejecting more crumbs everywhere. The bird then dropped a note on the table, and flew out the window again, leaving as abruptly as it had come. Petunia brushed the dirt off of Dudley's locks and then picked up the note.

'Don't open in Petunia, it's probably some rubbish.' Vernon said, but she opened it anyway.

Dear Dudley,

We are very pleased to tell you that you have a place at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry. We will pick you up at twelve tomorrow using dragons as transportation so we can take you shopping for school supplies. Whilst you are waiting, please practice saying these magic words, as they will help you dearly:

Abra Kadabra, Alakazam, and Hocus Pocus.

That is all, see you soon.

Petunia screamed, and dropped the letter. 'What is it?' Vernon asked, flabbergasted. He read the letter, and went chalk white. 'It c-can't b-be…' he muttered, and then he yelled so loudly that (much to Petunia's dismay) he aroused the whole neighborhood.

***

'H-harry' Ron managed to say, as he clutched his side 'I c-can't believe we did that.'

He burst out into another fit of laughter, dropping onto the maroon rug. Harry was sprawled on an armchair in the Gryffindor common room, accompanied by Ron, laughing so hard that his ribs hurt.

'I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU DID THAT!' Hermione screeched, stomping in through the portrait hole.

'C-come on H-hermione' Harry said, breathing heavily 'A-after all that I have gone through w-with them, t-they deserve that.'

He broke into another fit of laughter, and Hermione shook her head. 'They better not believe a word of it.' She said.

'They will believe every word of that letter. They don't know what a proper one looks like.' Ron pointed out, finally able to speak properly.

'I can just imagine Petunia's face when she thinks about dragons arriving outside of her house tomorrow.' Said Harry. 'Too bad that we can't get real dragons to go there- wait, Ron, what about Charlie? Could he fetch us a nice large drag-'

'HE CERTAINLY WILL NOT!' Hermione yelled.

'Sheesh, 'Mione, I was only joking.' Harry said.

'I can't believe that you sent him that letter. Now he thinks that he is a wizard! It is disgraceful to Hogwarts too; Abra Kadabra, Alakazam, and Hocus Pocus indeed. Why, I bet you could get expelled! And think how disappointed he, Petunia and Vernon will be when they find out that he isn't a wizard.'

'Disappointed? They will be pleased. I bet that they are thinking about disowning Dudley right now.' Harry said 'Oh, come on Hermione. I just created a stupid, simple letter saying that Dudley was coming to Hogwarts. It is fake, don't worry. It's just a prank.'

'But you probably broke at least ten school rules-' she began, but then Ron butted in.

'This is coming from the person who created Polyjuice Potion in their second year? You didn't care about breaking about fifty school rules then, so why care in fourth year about a few?'

Hermione blushed, and mumbled something about it being 'different circumstances then'.

Harry let them argue and focused on the letter that he had written and sent to the Dursley's. He began to laugh again. He could almost hear Vernon's yell from there.

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