It's September 20th, 1984 and there's a Sophia Loren marathon on TV. They're showing Houseboat and Steven remarks that he can't see Sophia Loren as a governess. "She hardly speaks English, man."

Jackie chews her wad of peppermint gum and kisses him on the cheek wordlessly, smiling when he puts his hand on the back of her neck.

The plastic diamond glued onto a plain gold band is starting to peel off and Jackie feels the nausea rising again and puts her hand on her stomach.

But, wait.

Let's start at the beginning.

The phone rings at 8:47 in the morning and Jackie answers, hoping it doesn't take long. She's already late for work.

"Jackie? Jackie, it's Mrs. Forman!" Mrs. Forman sounds worried and scared and shrill. "Jackie, we need you and Fez to come over immediately. Steven will be there to pick you up in five minutes. Pack your bags and be sure to pack something to hit stuff with." She's kind of screaming and Jackie resists the urge to hang up on her. "And bring any liquor you have!"

Jackie pauses. "Huh?" She rubs her eyes. It's too early for this and she's going to be so, so late.

"I have to go, dear. Stay safe and don't panic. Be sure to stay calm!" she shrieks, not following her own advice.

The dial tone blares and Jackie doesn't think to look out the window.

If she had, she would see a swarm of zombies in the parking lot outside her apartment complex.

The thing is, Jackie isn't exactly cut out for the zombie apocalypse. She likes painting her nails and Donnie Osmond and the color pink and frothy purple curtains and scented candles and diets. She's not like Steven who can outsmart them or Eric who can outrun them or Donna who can fight them off.

So when Steven comes banging on her door at 9:03 in the morning, she rolls her eyes and says, "Steven, I'm already late for work" as she fastens a necklace around her neck.

He pushes around her and starts toward her room. "Where's Fez?" he asks. He's tense and his sunglasses are off. He has a suitcase in his hand.

"He's already at work – Hey, stop that!"

Steven is going through her drawers, throwing her clothes into the suitcase. "You can't jumble my clothes up like that! I just got that dress dry-cleaned! Steven, stoppit!"

"Jackie, if you don't shut up, I'm just going to leave you here. Where's your frying pan?" When she points at the kitchen, he strides in, grabs it and hands it to her. "Carry this. Do inot/i drop it or let it go, okay? Do you promise me, Jackie?" And he's staring into her eyes now, making sure she's listening.

She nods and her lower lip trembles a little and she wonders why she's about to start crying. It's probably because Steven is doing that thing where he looks at her intently and he did that when they were dating, when she would tell him about her parents.

He makes sure to put her favorite dolls and makeup in the suitcase before zipping it up and grabbing the handle. "Come on, we don't have much time."

And he's holding her free hand now. His hand is still big and large and square with calloused fingertips and if Jackie weren't so scared, she'd be ecstatic.

Instead, she grips the frying pan tighter as they run down the stairs. "Okay, Jackie, I don't wanna scare you… but there are zombies outside," he says when they reach the front door of Jackie's apartment complex.

"What?"

Steven doesn't answer. He just opens up the door and leads her outside.

One of them lunges at Jackie, who screams and swats at it with a frying pan.

She hits its head and it splatters, blood and brains and bits of skull land on her, spotting on her good dress and she starts sobbing. "I never asked for this!" she wails, snot running down her face, getting in her mouth and she spits it out, stomping her foot like a child.

Steven wraps his arms around her and scoops her up and she's so small compared to him and she missed this so much that she cries harder and flings her arms around his neck, burying her face in the place where his neck meets his shoulder and closes her eyes. He smells like summer and clean sheets and his stash and she sighs.

He carries her through the parking lot and helps her into the El Camino and locks her door before climbing into the driver's seat. "Do me a favor, Jackie," he says.

She sniffles, wiping at her eyes. "What?"

"Stay strong." He starts the engine.

"Stay?" she repeats, incredulous.

"Yeah, baby." They pull out of the parking lot, swerving away from a small cluster of zombies and he puts in a Rolling Stones cassette tape. "Stay."

Kitty runs a bath for Jackie ("oh, honey, you're covered in brains, let's get you cleaned up") and praises Steven for helping her. Red is busy boarding up the back door and muttering about how "it should've been Koreans."

Donna and Eric are there, both white-faced and calling Kelso in Chicago and Fez at work. "No one's picking up," Donna says frantically, wringing her hands. "Why doesn't anyone pick up?"

Jackie climbs into the bathtub and draws her knees to her chest and cries, because all she wanted to do today was go to work and take a shower and watch TV with Fez before falling asleep and waking up and repeating.

Instead, there's a knock on the door and Steven comes in. "Hey."

Wiping at her eyes, she snaps, "Go away. I'm naked."

"I've seen you naked before, Jackie." He sits down on the toilet seat and stares her in the eye. "I'm sorry."

"For what? For that nurse or for Sam or for calling me a slut?"

He shrugs. "For everything. Jackie… I'm really, really sorry."

And he sounds so earnest that Jackie starts crying again and he pleads, "Don't cry, Jackie, please don't cry," and he puts his big, square, calloused hands on her shoulders and kisses the back of her head.

There's a long pause and he says, "I never stopped loving you, Jackie."

She takes in a deep, shuddering breath. "I know. I never stopped loving you, either, Steven."

Five minutes later, he's in the tub with her. She leans her back into his chest and he puts his arms around her.

The next day is Wednesday, August 3rd and Jackie and Steven sit at the table together sipping coffee and Steven's hand is covering Jackie's when Kelso comes bursting in, carrying Betsy with Brooke in tow. "Hey, you guys!" he shouts. "Did you notice that there are zombies outside?"

Jackie picks at her toast, crumbs falling off onto her plate and smiles at Steven.

The newspapers say it's a rabies outbreak.

Red says the damn Communists and Russians created the disease to get back at America.

Kitty says it's God's punishment for fighting so much and being so uptight about alcohol.

Steven says it's the government.

Jackie doesn't say it's a blessing in disguise as she snuggles up against Steven's side.

There's a fire down the street and Steven squeezes Jackie's hand.

Betsy cries and Donna chews on her lower lip.

Fez shows up on August 15th. He's angry and his best pants are stained with mud and blood. "I swear, the second I can, I am leaving this country! Good day, America!"

Kitty says, "But, Fez- "

"I said good day!"

Jackie is braiding Donna's hair when Steven appears in the doorway, shy and quiet and nervous. He's not wearing his sunglasses.

"Jackie…" he begins.

He awkwardly drops to one knee and hands her a small box.

Inside is a gold band with a plastic diamond glued to the top and Jackie squeals. "Oh, Steven!" she shrieks, grabbing him in a hug. "Oh, Steven, of course I will!"

It's September 4th.

On September 6th, Jackie puts on her best dress and Steven puts on his best pair of jeans and Led Zeppelin T-shirt and Red marries them in the middle of the Formans' living room.

Donna is the maid of honor, Eric is the best man and Kitty sits on the couch and cries.

"Jackie, do you take Steven to be your lawfully wedded husband?" Red asks.

Jackie smiles widely. "I do."

"Then as the God of this holy house, I pronounce you man and wife. Jackie, you may kiss the dumbass," Red says.

They kiss and Jackie cries a little.

During the night, they can hear screams.

Jackie closes her eyes and burrows closer to Steven in their small bed in the basement.

She doesn't try to identify them.

When Kelso goes out to get supplies, he says the Hub burned down.

Kitty continues to knit, but Jackie sees her hands shaking.

Here's the thing:

George Orwell was right, in a way. The government collapses in 1984, but it's not because of socialism.

It's because on September 9th, 1984, zombies swarm the White House and the graphic footage is broadcasted everywhere in the nation, from Pasadena, California to Point Place, Wisconsin.

Jackie throws up, but she's pretty sure it's not because she just saw a zombie crack open President Ronald Reagan's head and eat his brain.

The pregnancy test reads positive.

Steven starts sleeping with his hand flat on her stomach, fingers spread protectively.

Jackie dreams of clean, sweet-smelling babies and green lawn and a white picket fence. Steven has a nine-to-five job and Jackie wears red lipstick and a blue dress and everyone loves each other and everyone gets what they want.

"We should go to Mexico," Red announces on September 14th. "Put our backs to the ocean."

"How would we get there?" Steven asks.

"No," Jackie protests. "I would look horrible in a bikini if I'm pregnant."

Steven kisses the top of her head and wraps his arm around her shoulders. He's more affectionate now and Jackie thinks Mexico might not be a bad thing.

"Do you think my mom and dad are okay?" she asks Steven one night. Her voice is small in the darkness.

She feels him shift beside her. "I don't… I dunno, doll. Try to get some sleep. We've got a long day tomorrow."

He's talking about planning on how they're going to transport themselves from Point Place to Mexico and Jackie takes a deep breath.

"Steven? I'm scared."

Steven kisses the back of her head and rubs her stomach. "I know you are, baby. But just imagine Forman's pale, skinny legs on the beach."

She smiles and feels a few tears drip onto her pillow.

"Where did the sun go?" Kelso asks one day, peering through the cracks between the boards.

Kitty deals another hand of gin rummy and finishes her coffee and bourbon. "Looks like you might not get a tan in Mexico after all, Eric."

"You'd think the zombie attack would be punishment enough," Donna mutters.

Oh, are we back to September 20th?

Right, then.

This is how it ended:

Jackie falls asleep during It Started in Naples, her head on Steven's shoulder, her hands in her lap.

There's a loud crash from the basement and everyone jolts. Donna covers her mouth to muffle her scream and Red leaps to his feet. He has an old baseball bat and he charges downstairs and no one tries to stop him.

Brooke holds Betsy close to her chest and Kelso wraps his arms around them.

Kitty is crying. She hears Red's shouts from the basement and falls to the ground.

Steven helps her to her feet and to the couch and starts tearing boards off the front door. "Jackie, run," he orders and grabs her arm roughly. "Jackie, you have to get out of here."

"No, Steven, I can't – "

"Run!" he barks and crushes his lips to hers, squeezing her arms.

There's a snarl and she hears Brooke and Donna scream and suddenly she's holding Betsy in her arms and Betsy is so young and small and Steven keeps shouting, "run, run, run" over and over like a mantra before he says, "I love you."

Jackie is outside and Steven is inside and there's a locked door between them. "I love you," he repeats and she can see a shine in his eyes. "I love you." He smiles a little at her and she closes her eyes.

Jackie holds Betsy's hand and runs to the car. She feels the heat behind her and smells the smoke.

Betsy cries and Jackie doesn't. Jackie is in shock.

They hear glass shatter behind them as Jackie tries to start the El Camino. She buckles Betsy up and Betsy asks, "Where's my momma?" and Jackie breathes, "I don't know. I don't know."

She can't help but think, "you're going to die, you're going to die, you're going to die."

The El Camino is a stick shift.

She starts to cry.

My husband is dead, Jackie thinks and twists her wedding ring around her finger, causing the plastic diamond to fall off. My husband is dead and my friends are dead and I'm only twenty-three and I'm going to have a baby, and my goddaughter and I are going to die because I can't drive a fucking stick shift.

She tells Betsy not to worry because she's laughing.

The thing about Jackie, though, is that she's not stupid.

She's a fast learner.

The El Camino creeps along slowly and Betsy cries herself to sleep and she's curled up in the passenger seat, her head lolling to one side and her mouth open a little.

Jackie turns on the radio.

The car smells like Steven – smoky and musky and warm.

She wonders what will happen when she runs out of gas.

Betsy reminds her of Michael and this is oddly comforting.

She feels her lower lip start to tremble again and she puts her hand on her stomach for reassurance and throws the car in drive. She turns on the radio.

Ours is the fire, all the warmth we can find. He is a feather in the wind.

Jackie smiles and ruffles Betsy's brown curls and heads south. She knows how to get to Mexico, she read the maps with Red and Steven and Donna and she's not stupid.

All of my love, all of my love, all of my love, to you.

"I'm sure the sun is still in Mexico," she muses and grips the steering wheel tightly.

end.