Another Card from the Deck
(Natasha, Laura, Pepper, Sharon & Jane get drunk and confessing who they would date out of the male Avengers if they weren't already spoken for)
"Bad news girls that was Maria and she can't make it tonight so it's just us this time around," Pepper announced walking back from the kitchen once the rest of them had finished rearranging the furniture.
"Well, that sucks but at least your guys good at stocking the bar so we don't have to make a booze run." Sharon commented.
"Wared you get that?" Laura asked when everyone was now stalled into a more conferrable position in front of both the flat screen and the bar eyeing the small golden bottle Jane had just fished from her pocket.
"Swiped it from an Asgardian." The scientist grinned. "Okay got the booze got the snacks got the guys out of our hair for the night let's get this party started." Pepper announced passing each person the first round of beers.
"JARVIS hit it."
"Of course Miss Romanoff." The IA replied diming the lights and playing one of the sappy chick-flick movies they and argued over for the first hour.
An Hour and not so many rounds later
"What so you're saying I can't be a tech fan and an old-school kind of girl at the same time?" Sharon asked drunkenly taking another deep drag from her nearly empty bottle.
"You're dating a nearly seventy-year-old man with the face of a schoolboy and the bod of a model I think you can't get any more old school than that." Laura countered "so try again."
The blond rolled her eyes as she thought "Fine so Clint for the field know how and…Thor for everything else." She decided after several minutes.
"He's really not that bad in the brains department just a lot outspoken when he probably shouldn't be." Jane defended disjointedly.
"You wanna talk loud and outspoken I sleep with Iron Man for crying out loud...every night" Pepper argued, "so I'd go with Bruce and Clint or Bruce and Steve one of the two….what sorry I can't help it the guys got smarts pulse he's more laid back than Tony." She defended when Natasha sent her a warning glare.
"Yeah, and I got the guy that brought a bow and arrows to an alien bar brawl in Manhattan." Laura chimed in randomly making all five woman bust out laughing. "So I'd have to go with Thor and Bruce." She decided "Brains and muscle." She nodded toasting those two words before downing the rest of her tequila "What Coop and Li are staying at my parents for the weekend…I'm not driving." She slurred with a teasing half smirk when Natasha raised her eyebrow.
"What about you Jany…Jane." Pepper prompted "Thor." The woman answered promptly nodding in agreement with her own choice. "You already gets him pick someone else." Sharon groaned "Fine…Steve and Banner." The scientist countered rolling her eyes. "Can't stand Tony and Bruce's smarter anyways."
Pepper turned ignoring the dig at her boyfriend while Natasha smiled smugly for the praise on hers, but that didn't last when Pepper spoke again "Alright getting late so this lastest one of the night…so better be good one." The nine percent assistant took a long pull from her glass then turned to face a nervous looking Black Widow "you up chek'ka." she prompted with a wide and prying schoolgirl grin spreading across her face as the rest of the group leaned in.
"Ookay your cut off." Natasha announced stalling for time as her vision became all the more blurred praying she would simply pass out rather than have to answer rolling her eyes at the wounded puppy look she was getting as she swiped the scotch glass from her friend's hand tipping the Constance into her own mouth and passed the now sloshing flask back to Jane's hand. "Put away." She ordered
"Stop stalling Blacky boots." Sharon whimpered teasingly "Come on we told yous ares isss only fair…." the blonde hiccuped into her beer bottle.
"The Hulk." Natasha mumbled after a long chug from her beer bottle and even more egging on by the rest of the pack her head bowed and her voice low.
"Hu?" Pepper grinned like a russet-haired Chester Cat in high heels "Didn't get that."
"Hulk." Widow repeated with only a hint more volume in her voice. "I Knew it." Laura and Pepper cheered simultaneously while the other two gave similar shouts of "NO WAY!"
"But that means…" Laura began but Nat cut her off shaking her head "I have Banner not Hulk…theirs mega difference." She insisted and when everyone gave her a quizzical look she elaborated throwing insecurity and what was supposed to be complete secrecy to the wind in her intoxicated state.
"Bruce won't let me around Hulk when not up to our necks in laser fire or whatever else we've faced in the last week and a half…And its getting on my last nerve cause I get his dorky beauty all the time now we together an all but-ugima!- I want some green guy beast time in there too…besides I've already made out with Steve, Clint's like my brother, I can't stand Tony ninety-eight point five percent of the time and while Thor is nice to look at…"
"Yeah, he is." Jane interjected loudly knocking back another shot. Widow growled rolling her eyes as she continued her alcohol and repressed longing induced mini-rant "And I loves my dork more than even I get sometimes but still want spend more time with Hulk." She finished blushing and giggling like a love-struck schoolgirl.
"AWW…Nat and Hulk kissing in the street…S.M.A …." Sharon sang drunkenly but broke off halfway through her eyes clouded as she thought over the next letter. "S.M.A…S.M.A…" she repeated several times "…ing." She finished giving up as she was too intoxicated to care at this point.
"That is defiantly not how you spell kissing honey." Laura corrected chuckling lightly as she shook her head. "Then they're clearly not doing it right." Jane and Pepper said together making the other two roar with laughter while Natasha buried her face in her hands, her face turning as red as her hair. "Shut up… Astrovia." She finished snagging the rest of the concussion Jane had just made and tossing it back in one. "Holy Russia that's got punch." she wheezed leaning forward resting her forehead against the bar and bracing her hands on her knees.
"Well, you'd know all about that wouldn't you Black Nat." Sharon giggled "Did you even know what was in that?" Laura questioned nodding to the now empty cocktail glass as she patted the still coughing Black Widow on the back. Jane just shrugged hopping up over the bar to follow the pair back to the couch "I still testing…what sfor Science." She said importantly giggling like crazy behind her glass as she drains it down while the mother of two leveled a not so threatening glare at her.
"What's for science?"
All five women whipped around…It would seem that girl's night was officially crashed by a blurry five-membered gang of dark jeans and a mix of denim and leather jackets framed in the doorway…..
"This a no boy's party…comebacks later." Sharon giggled her sentiment echoed by both Jane and Laura "How long yous standing there?" Pepper demanded while Natasha tried to melt into the couch in sham her face still bright red from their earlier teasing growing even more crimson as she slumped lower in her seat.
"Not long I assure you." Thor soothed making Jane burst into unladylike and high pitched giggles as he smiled at them. "…we caught the whole for science toast but I'm a bit confused about who can't spell kissing." Steve finished exchanging a glance with Clint who just shook his head with a light smirk.
"So whach'a been up to ladies?" Tony asked eyeing the impressive amount of empties littering the floor while the rest of the men fanned out in front of the doorway
"Talk." Sharon answered promptly while Pepper and Jane snickered "Boys had your out so we had in." Laura slurred
"JARVIS called." Bruce spoke up finally stepping around the band still blocking the doorway.
"Traitor." Four out of the five women called drunkenly to the ceiling while Natasha simply concentrated on not hyperventilating at the appealing sight before her made all the more mouthwatering thanks to the generous amount of Asgardian alcohol running in her veins. She mentally strangled herself in a hug for talking him into that dark jean and navy blue shirt set while she dragged herself to her feet trying hard not to trip as she moved toward him for a better look.
"I'd say operation sober up is officially a go guys." Clint suggested smirking at the angry mew the russet-haired assassin made when she collided with the overhanging balcony's guard rail. "Cl-awks I might seeing double and really fuzzy but I still hit you in head with can bottle thingy" Natasha hissed glaring at them holding the flat screen remote aloft in one hand as she gripped the railing tightly with the other.
"Is our little Russian Romanoff drunk?" Tony asked incredulously staring wide-eyed at the swaying spy in front and a good four and a half feet above them. "You wanna test Iron-pants?" she asked redirecting her blurry eyed glare at him instead swaying dangerously close to the edge of the barrier.
Everyone watched with staggered gasps of surprised and drunken awws as Bruce sped forward in a swift jump (seeming to have forgotten there were stairs on either side of him) grabbing the bottom level of the balcony in one try and hoisted himself up and over the railing with a speed and agility some in the room drunk or no were ashamed to admit they didn't think he had outside of fully becoming the Other Guy.
"Nice par core Dork." the intoxicated assassin greeted grinning sheepishly when his arms slid protectively around her his deep brown and light green flecked eyes making breathing a whole lot more complicated now that he was standing so close. "Hulkner." She groaned while her overly protective (and supposed to be totally secret) boyfriend swung her nu-to-gently gently into his arms as if she weighted nothing like the 131 lbs. she actually was.
"Isall Jane fault." Sharon slider apologetically "Her one mix stuff." She huffed earning a glare from the woman in question as the rest of the partygoers were divided up between the remaining males in the room.
"Well Nat, Jane and Sharon have skipped out to head to Tippy Town who else is next." Tony asked looking pointedly between Pepper and Laura earning a surprisingly hard smack to the back of his head by the former. "Shut it Iron pants."
"No fair." The inebriated scientist pouts while her literal God of a boyfriend held the once stolen flask over his head barking a laugh each time she tried to make a jump for it before giving up and stomping away like an angry child while a still chuckling Thor followed close behind. "I hate you." Jane hissed pillowing her head against his chest. "I know love and I will no doubt be paying dearly for my behavior come sunrise."
"Just what we need a sarcastic walking lighting rod." Tony rolled his eyes but winked at the smirking Captain America across from him. "Speaking of tomorrow you ladies do realize you'll have the thousands time great intergalactic grandma of all hangovers right?" Clint asked as his wife nuzzled happily into his side using his now hijacked coat as a blanket.
"Worth it…" the remaining three mumbled (Banner and Nat having slipped away when everyone was watching Jane and Thor) "We need girl's night oftener." Sharon decided "Make note Cap." She grinned up at Steve who rolled his eyes. "Yeap and so told you so Hawks" Laura gloated before she descended into the darkness of alcohol-induced sleep.
Meanwhile out in the hall
"Don't ever scare us like that again Tasha" Bruce begged once they were out of sight and hearing range of the others hugging her close "I not mine too..." She insisted Bruce sighted knowing it had everything to do with the alcohol and nothing with her that she was acting this way.
"Just sleep Nat." He told her gently "And don't worry even if you do have a whole arsenal stashed under your bed I'm still not leaving your side for the next two days." He promised rambling now "Nu-hu you my perstection now that all in closet." She giggled.
Bruce prayed she wouldn't remember the fact that his walk became more like a slow strut as they rounded the last curve having taken the long way toward the elevators. "Night Hulky." She mumbled nuzzling his chest as she pulled herself closer. "Good night amica mea." Banner whispered against her hair as she drifted off to sleep before he even had a chance to hit the elevator call button.
Author Note: (amica mea is suppose to be the Latin saying for 'My Love')