Between a Brass and a Woodwind.
Yet another saxophone story. Only this one is funny, based off the argument of the saxophone classification.

People fought about what classification the saxophone family belonged in. The clarinets claimed it as a woodwind, as it used a reed, but then it was pointed out that so does the bass clarinet and it was a low voice brass-species by the percussion. The trombone section claimed it as their own type, because it was made with the same stuff that the brass was. The flutes argued it was woodwind because of the keys, while the trumpets pointed out that some of them have spit valves. The oboeist argued right back that it was woodwind because of the noises, while the baritones stated that tenor and bari usually made very low noises and the alto went low too. A piccoloist dared to tell the baritonists the saxophone was a woodwind because they played up high, but then the tubist reminded her that nearly the entire brass secion could play higher than them sometimes, and that the saxophone played louder than them, as did the brass, and they hardly had the melody, like the brass. To this, bass clairnetist said the saxophone was a woodwind because it had more than two parts to it, it had three at least, and four if you count the reed, and that the bass clarinet was still woodwind, and the saxophone was just a low woodwind. Now the entire brass section argued the saxophone was brass and they had more reasons. A bored bass guitar player, who wrote what was said, counted it out.
'Brass:
IIIIIII

Woodwind:
IIIIII'
"Brass had seven and woodwinds had... six."
"HA!" yelled a brass player. "TOLD YOU!"
"They're not getting anywhere," sniggered an altoist. "we're woodwind, but the brass doesn't get that, do they?"
"Apparently not," said a percussionist, ducking a flying bottle of slide oil.
Not even the diector could get the arguing brass and woodwind to stop. Not even a percussionist blasting a nearby trumpet could shut them up. Eventually, the percussionists and the saxes just watched, eating gummy bears and such, laughing at the sections as they argued. Brass still had more reasons, though the woodwind tried. it was no use,.
They'd all have to be shot.
"SHUT UP!" bellowed the whole perc. and sax section. At once, the brass and woodwinds spun around. One of them punched another one last time. "Guys! get over it!"
The sax section shook their heads. "You all ought to be ashamed."
"Why?"
"Because... there's a quivering drumstick in the wall."
"Oh... IT'S A BRASS!"
"IT'S A WOODWIND YOU MORON!"
Perc. and Sax sighed.
"We tried."