The Demon attacks had increased after the weeks since Crowley had discovered that Castiel was alive. While he might have fled from that factory, on that day it was getting away with the tablet that had mattered; now the angel's death was what mattered to him. And he had plenty of minions that he could send after the angel and if the first didn't succeed then they could try try try again. That thought pleased Crowley immensely.
And those that didn't succeed at least made the angel's life a living misery and one day Crowley, supposed that he may get the news that the angel was dead.
Castiel had learnt his lesson from the past, that is not a bad thing to ask to help when it is needed, that alone showed him how far he had come. And how it is needed, right now, two months of constant attacks had left him run low on energy and despairing, it would be so easier just to give up. But instead he goes to the person who could help him and yet that is the person he wishes he could protect from this situation the most.
Dean sipped a cold beer, letting the bubbly drink tickle his tongue and sooth his dry throat, it had been a heavy days driving and he felt some of the tension leave his shoulders. He looked to the burnt orange carpet of the motel and wondered if he would catch anything if he took his boots off.
"Dean," a voice interrupted his thoughts of fungal foot infections, the only voice that made the hunters heart skip a beat and the airs on his arms prickle, "Cas?" he looked around to see the a very exhausted angel and immediately Dean jumped up, "Hey! Hey! Cas! What's happened? Are you ok?"
Deans raised voiced alerted Sam who had been in the bathroom, his face instantly burrowed into deep concern. Dean scanned over Castiel sensing a deep weight upon the angel's shoulders and Dean felt sick. Ever since Castiel had admitted that he had considered suicide, Dean had been inwardly frantic and when he looked at the angel right now and how weary and exhausted he looked, it did not fill Dean with confidence.
"What is it Cas?" Sam asked throwing his dirty clothes on the bed.
"Crowley is after me. He wants me dead, I have a bounty upon my head and he keeps sending demons after me. At first I thought I could fight them off, that was two months ago," he explained, the brothers looked at each other then back to the angel, "It seems the King of Hell is quite determined."
"Ok what do you need us to do?" Dean asked quickly, going straight into battle mode, his eyes alert and his jaw tensed, he wasn't going to let anything happen to Cas.
"I don't know, I have one following me, he won't be long behind me, I am just so tired of running, I wasn't sure what I was thinking coming here..." he blinked, his blue eyes looking up to Deans.
Dean cursed at the information that Cas was supplying, the angel swayed on his feet and Dean grabbed the angel's shoulder, "You're wounded?" he pointed to a blotch of blood on the Castiel's white shirt.
"Weakened," Castiel replied, "I have been fighting for two month's solid, the last fight, it was very close and Crowley won't stop till he sees my dead body."
Dean bit back the anger that was threatening to spill over his mouth and inspire him to lash out, "don't you give up Cas," he screamed internally.
Sam shuffled on his feet; he brushed his hands through his hair, "Then we have to let Crowley see your dead body." Dean and Castiel looked to the younger Winchester as if he were mad.
"Cas," Sam said rolling his eyes when he realised that they had not figured it out, "We need to fake your own death. You could leave Jimmy's body and possess Dean. Then we find a scene, paint black wings around Jimmy's body and let the demon track you there. When they see a dead body, they will report back to Crowley that you are dead and then you hope back to your own body."
Dean had listened intently, but the only thing that had got his attention ringing a bell louder than Big Ben was the part of the plan that meant he was going to be possessed by Castiel. Which he wouldn't mind but a certain part of him panicked as he looked to Cas who seemed thoughtful, hope in his eyes when there had not been before.
"Hold on, how come it's me that gets to be possessed?"
Sam sighed and Castiel glared, "Mentally after the cage, Sam isn't strong enough to survive a possession. I can leave my vessel, but only for a short period. It could work."
Dean nodded, he wanted to keep that hope in his friend's eyes, the angel had come to him for help and he was glad but then he remembered something and coughed, " I have a couple rules though," Dean said carefully, "One, we both have control, we won't fool anybody if I start sprouting crap that only you would say. And two if you keep out the personal stuff in my head."
Castiel nodded, "Put everything that you don't want me to see behind a wall and I won't see it and I won't be able to go behind it without your permission. We have to be quick about this, the demons won't be long. But we have to be sure that we are going to do this."
Dean looked to Sam, then back to the angel and stood up, opening his arms, "We are going to do this together Cas," he said firmly, "Together."
Castiel met the hunters green eyes and he felt his heart ache, the hunter had so much faith in him, even after everything that they had gone through. It was one of the many things that Castiel loved about Dean Winchester and he knew that the hunter was the only one who could get him this, he breathed deeply, "Dean Winchester will you accept me?"
Dean smiled softly, "Yes."
Dean remembered Jimmy saying when he had been possessed by Castiel that it felt like being chained to a comet but nothing could have prepared him for the actual feeling. He felt everything, he noticed everything, everything was brighter, lighter and yet heavy at the same time.
The best way to describe it was it was like floating on your back in a very large lake, he looked to Sam who stared at him, his eyes wide and he saw the body of Jimmy on the floor. Sam was talking to him but he wasn't answering even though his lips were moving. But they were not his words; they were not even his thoughts.
Aw come on Cas, I thought we were going to do this together.
Sam nodded and lifted the body placing on the bed, grabbing his laptop and quickly opening it starting working on it.
I am sorry Dean, I needed to speak to Sam, and you will now find you have control of your own voice
What did you say to Sam?
I told him you were fine and that we needed to find somewhere we could stage this fake death and black paint.
And I couldn't have told him that? Sorry it's just all very strange
Forgive me Dean; I know I have asked a great deal
Forget it dude, you needed my help and I am pleased you asked for our help, just a little bit more warning
I will try and give you as much control as I am able to Dean, like you said we are going to do this together.
They managed it somehow, both being in the control seat, it confused Sam when he tried to tall to Dean and all he got was a tilt of his brothers head and though it's brother's voice it's wasn't Dean. Then in the next moment there was a crack of a bottle opener and Dean was there handing him a bottle of beer.
Dean sensed Cas, he sensed his grace, predictably it was a bright white light that felt so warm, it was almost a golden light, but out of courtesy and perhaps fear, Dean kept well out. And in return Cas did not go beyond the wall that Dean had built up, separating his most private thoughts from the angel.
Dean watched as Cas, who was currently in control as he helped Sam paint angel wings around Jimmy's body, in an abandoned warehouse, they are hoping that Cas, although in Dean's body, the demons can still track the traces of the angel's grace.
Bored, Dean watched the warm golden light, he couldn't help himself be drawn to the light, and it felt so peaceful compared to the thoughts of Castiel which raced by at 100 miles per hour. The grace looked so lovely to him, he did not realise how close he was until he was in the centre of it.
And it's so calm, which surprised Dean that although the angel is full of guilt, the centre of Castiel's grace is love. An emotion so new and pure to the angel and Dean could not get over how it felt how he felt himself soar and envelop him. It was enough to make Dean feel like he could fly, like he could do anything, that he would do anything.
And then he realised the love in Castiel's grace is for him.
Dean did not know what to think, he was in shock and in the shock he almost missed Cas call to him.
Dean the demons are coming, you need to take control of your body, they cannot be allowed to suspect me being here. I must be very quiet and stay hidden; I have the charm necklace on so it will hopefully cover up any traces of my grace.
Ok Cas, here it goes, trust me this is going to work, remember we are doing this together.
In reality, it isn't hard to act mournful over the dead body of Jimmy Novak, because to Dean though it is not Cas, it's still a small part of him that is lying on the ground. The demons laughed at the brothers and taunted them over the dead angel, it seemed that Dean and Sam had sold it, because the demons had bought it.
Bought it so much that none of them could have guessed that the King of Hell himself would have wanted to dance over the dead body, Dean was surprised that Crowley wasn't wearing his kilt, he looked so happy.
Dean, Crowley will be able to see me
What? How?
He is the King of Hell; I would have to go deeper in your mind to hide from him
Then do it
Dean I can't I promised that I wouldn't go beyond the wall in your mind.
Dammit Cas, hide you son of a bitch and hurry up before the demons see me arguing with myself
Castiel had seen a lot of Dean's thoughts while he had possessed his friend, he had seen a lot of his memories of his childhood, and he had sensed the warmth of the hunter's love for his baby brother when Dean looked at the lanky younger Winchester.
But nothing could have prepared him for the assault of feelings and memories that Dean had hidden behind the wall he had created. The warmth overwhelmed and stunned him.
All of the memories were of him.
All the feelings, the pain, the hurt, desire, lust, affection, anger and the love, the pure pulsating love...the love...
Castiel was in the centre of Dean's soul and the love at the centre of it is for him.
Crowley had been jubilant, not being able to contain his glee but should have has asked for the body and so to all purposes to the King of Hell, his minions, to Hell, Earth and Heaven. Castiel, angel of the lord was dead.
Only when they were in the next state did Castiel leave Dean and return to Jimmy's body, the angel and hunter looked at each other awkwardly and barely said anything to each other, their faces blushed when they stared into each other's eyes.
Noticing this Sam made an excuse to go to local library, he said he wanted to look for a Latin translation of something and he left the pair standing opposite each other in the motel room.
Dean cleared his throat, "So how does it feel to just being just you?"
Castiel nodded, "Satisfactory."
Dean nodded, to be honest he felt slightly bereft without the angel, he missed the warmth and then he remembered what he had seen in the grace and he blushed and looked at the carpet.
Then Castiel spoke, "I saw beyond the wall Dean, I saw the centre of your soul" his eyes were wide as if he were still in shock, which he was, because he couldn't really believe it. He wouldn't.
"I saw the centre of your grace." Dean countered, stepping closer to the angel, "But I miss it, I miss the warmth."
Castiel tilted his head to the side, confused and bemused, "It's yours Dean, it has and always will be yours," he replied gruffly, as he watched Dean lift his hand and cautiously placed it on the angel's chest. Castiel smiled and mimicked the gesture placing his hand upon Dean's chest, pressing hard he could feel the human's heartbeat rapidly, "I miss the warmth too," he said softly.
Dean leaned closer, "It's yours, I shouldn't have kept it from you, but I didn't..." he broke off as desire choked his throat, "I didn't know if you felt the same."
"Why do you think I didn't keep anything from you?" Castiel asked, a bashful smile playing on his lips, lips that he licked when felt the heat of Dean's breath against them.
Dean grinned as he closed the gap between them and pressed his lips against the angel, instantly the pair felt warmth spread to their chests, the warmth that each had in their soul and grace.