Title: Battle of the Blondes
Author: wbelisabeth
Rating: PG-13 for swearing.
Words: Chapter 1 – 1100
Summary: Callie has a type… and it's going to come down to a battle of the blondes. Callie/Arizona, Callie/Erica, Callie/Sadie.
Type: Multi-chaptered fluff. Not sure how this is going to turn out or if I will finish it, but… I thought it would be a fun premise to play with. It's angst to start, but… I need some light entertainment so… this should continue in a more lighthearted manner, for a couple of chapters.
Spoilers: To 6 x 22 – starts off from where the episode left Callie.
Disclaimer: All copyrighted materials reference within this fan-fiction is not mine. I do not own Grey's Anatomy or any characters of Grey's. This is for entertainment purposes only. I am not making any money out of this whatsoever. Any real people, places, events etc referenced in this work of fiction is done so in an entirely fictional manner and is not mean to be libelous or defamatory.
I was doing ok. I was. I had been watching, sure I can admit that. I was numb – and that's ok too. Then? Then her lips met mine and I felt the white heat. I felt the excruciating pain as her lips left mine and she walked away. I was doing fine. Until she kissed me.
This is the first time in a week I have felt – really felt.
I'm the type of person, if I'm happy, you'll know. If I'm angry, you'll know. This week I've been in limbo. Sure I was sulking. I'm used to getting my own way. But until I saw her, until I breathed her name and until I felt body against mine again… I felt nothing.
I had to get out of there. I had to escape the searing heat, the extraordinary amount of pain. I left the hospital and found solace with spring rain. As the droplets of rain hit my face, I felt once more. I felt her touch disappear. But there was no hope because I felt the memory burnt into my brain.
She has me. I have her. Yet we don't.
There is nothing I can do to expel her from my brain. I can't rid the memory of her saying she loved me the first time. I can't rid myself of her voice as she made me watch a Disney musical marathon, and sang along to every one loudly and off key. I am unable to forget losing a patient and having her snuggle into me in an on-call room and hold me to ease my pain. Up until 5 minutes ago, it was just memories. Now, each one brings on a new wave of feeling. Hopelessness. Anger. Sadness. Nausea.
It's hard to breath. How can it be hard to breathe? How can emotions affect me so physically?
I sit forward in a brace position. Hoping the air finds me.
She was so forceful, so passionate. She was desperate.
I have been watching her. I know that she's hurting. Her façade was something that I learnt to see through over time. Her right dimple was missing whenever I saw her smile. It only makes an appearance when she is truly happy. The left one appears anytime she tries to smile, but the right one is reserved for happiness. It's been missing for weeks. Even before the break-up. Her heeleys were missing too. She didn't wear them, not even on rounds. In the last week I have not seen them once. And I have been watching her.
I wish she had missed the elevator. I wish that she had been held up for 20 seconds more. I think I enjoyed not feeling.
The raindrops are no longer doing anything to cool my pain. I start to stand and my knees buckle. Maybe I should stay here a little more. When was the last time I ate? Probably about the same time I last slept… too long ago to remember. I don't feel hungry. I don't feel tired.
What do I feel? I feel the cool raindrops, hitting my jacket. I feel the hot droplets falling from my face. I feel my lungs in want of air.
"Callie?"
I look up.
God hates me. Obviously.
"Are you ok?"
I don't answer, except I can't help but see the irony.
I laugh.
"God hates me."
She sits down beside me and looks into my eyes. I see blue, but not the blue I want. I look at the wet blonde colour of her hair and it's not the blonde I want.
"Whatever you are here for Erica, go and do it… I want to be left alone."
"Ok."
She kisses my lips and my eyes go wide. I shove her away.
"What are you doing here?"
"I came back for you."
"Well go back."
"But you look so lost… so sad… so, in pain."
"I am, but there is nothing you can do or say to fix it."
I stand with strength I didn't know I had and walk directly over to Joes. She cannot make an appearance there. She cannot make a scene there.
"Callie, what can I get you?" I mull over my options, but considering I can't remember the last time I ate, I opt for the safest option.
"Can I get a juice Joe?"
"Just a straight up juice? No vodka, no tequila? No alcohol whatsoever?"
"No. Thanks." At my reply he makes a face at me, after delivering my juice he loiters in front of me. I look up at him. I raise an eyebrow.
"Well it sounds like you need to talk."
"Really?"
"Well that and you are soaked to the bone and then there is also the fact that Arizona is over there on a date."
WTF?
My head swivels round quicker than I recognize. I notice her and a woman who seems vaguely familiar talking. Arizona laughs at something. And I see it. The right dimple. Hmmf.
I feel the familiar feeling of everything I know crashing down around me. I drink the whole glass of juice in one go, pull out a few notes and hand them to Joe. Once again find strength to leave. And this time I head straight for my appartment.
God obviously hates me, and is waiting for the right time to smite me... in the meantime there's obviously a whole torture thing happening.
I stare at the blonde in front of my door. I briefly wonder how she even knew where I lived, before just feeling annoyed.
I definitely have a type. If that's anything.
She starts to talk in that weird accent that changes every 4 and a half seconds.
"What do you want?"
"I can't get you out of my head."
"It's been what… Almost a year and a half since I've seen you."
"I know and I still can't get you out of my head."
I unlock the door, and look over at her leaning against the wall.
"Look, what do you want?"
"You."
"Sadie, we barely even flirted, in fact I think every time you flirted with me I had an episode of gay panic… so really you just flirted with me while I looked on horrified… Why are you really here?"
"I want a shot at you."
"Look I've just broken up with someone and I-"
"Great. How's tomorrow night?" She's always been a tad inappropriate, why would she stop now?
"No. Sadie… just… no."
"Ok, but just so you know… I'll be around the hospital. I got my act together and I am back as a resident… so… see you around!"
Yep. God. Hates. Me.