Oh no. The girls again... Buffer sighed to himself, as he passed X and Nav in the hall. That's all he needed on this slow boring day when his mind had nothing to occupy it. "Think paperwork. Think paper work."
"How's it going, Buff?" Asked Nav, running her hand down his arm. " Bored out of your mind yet?"
"It is a slow day, Nav," he replied, moving slowly out of her reach.
"There is nothing wrong with a slow day, Buff," smiled X, clapping a hand on his shoulder. " Relax and enjoy it."
"OK. You can remove that hand now. Please."
"Our Buffer prefers a little action, eh Buff," chuckled Bomber who had just come up behind him.
As he turned she gave him a mock one/two punch. Buffer smiled as he stopped her hand from connecting.
"Oh not you too, Bomber. What is with you girls? Hello. Man here. Stop touching!"
"Why is it they always do this to me. Never see them touching the other guys. I can imagine what would happen if they laid hands on the CO or ET or even Spider like this. Sigh. Oh yeah. They're men. Old Buff is just another piece of the ship."
"Yes, a little action would definitely be good, Bomber," he smiled back.
"Poor Buffer."
"Another hand on the freaking arm!! HELLOOO..MAN!!"
"Maybe a run around the deck or some pushups would help," suggested Nav, smiling in sympathy.
"Not what I had in mind, Ma'am!"
"That's our Buff. A well-oiled piece of equipment. Gotta keep in shape Buff," added Bomber as she hit him on the arm again, and then rubbed it in mock apology.
"Yep. That's me. Just another piece of equipment THAT DOESN'T NEED POLISHING! Hands! Hands!"
"Maybe I'll just go do an inventory of the equipment, ma'am."
Let's see. We have a 81mm Mortar, two .50 Cal Machine guns, the 40mm Bofors gun and, oh yeah, the 80kg BUFFER!!
X smiled and placing a hand on his shoulder, whispered in mock conspiracy, "Maybe I can get permission for you to test the big gun, Buffer."
The girls watched his face light up with that slow Buffer grin and they smiled back in supposed understanding, as he slowly drawled,"Oh yes ma'am. Definitely need to fire that big gun."
BANG! BANG! BANG!