A/N: Hey this is just a one shot I wrote like 3 years ago. I'm sorry if it burns your eyes. I was just doing some file cleaning the other day so I thought I might as well upload this. I will hopefully get another story up soon. I keep getting writers block and school work is piling up but I'll try my best! I really want improve my writing. I don't know why but my life goal is to publish a novel but then I remember Snooki publish novels too.

The autumn leaves were scattering along the roadside. Most of them had already fallen

off the trees. You could hear the howling of wind, whistling through the old rustic shed. I

came to a sudden stop and found myself staring an enormous playground surrounded

by emptiness. It was the playground we used to play in. I turned my head away, with a

tear flowing down my cheek.

"Ah, so this is the feeling of goodbye. Idiot, I'm still too young to be reminiscing about

the past, and I'm too old be crying on the street. I bet I look like a complete fool." I told

myself.

I somehow managed to move my feet and walked onwards on the dusty road, trying to

forget but the truth was I didn't want to. My recollection of him was filled with smiles and

laughter. Those thought brought me joy and yet somehow it hurt me at the same time.

Even though those memories were painful to me I never wanted to forget him. Just

those times we spent together were the best I had.

We met each other at the tender age of four in kindergarten. I still don't remember now

how we became friends but, I didn't regret it at all. Not soon after we found out we live

just a block away. Everyday we'd visit each other. Our families would have trips and go

to new places. Back then we did many things together. More than half of my childhood

memories contained him in it. We'd sleep together side by side. Learnt and discovered

new exciting things to children. Play stupid games we made up. That was how it was.

Once we got older we went to different schools, so we saw each other less but not had

much changed. Once we spent two years apart and after that we were still able to greet

each other as if it's had only been a month. We'd find ourselves arguing over pointless

things and laughing until our voices disappeared. I found myself falling for him. I

cherished every day that I spent with him. I was content. When I felt lonely, he was

there to reassure me. When I felt betrayed, he was there to comfort me. When I felt

upset, he was there to cheer me up. I could always talk to him freely. Things never really hurt me because I had thought he'd stay besides me forever, spreading those

welcoming arms of his. He was someone who accepted me no matter what, but then I

had to learn to let go of the selfish, dependant me. I hadn't realise I was so dependent

on him, it was almost sickening, as if I was a helpless toddler still. Then, to suddenly

have that disappear, It was something that altered me in ways I couldn't tell myself.

The memory of that one day played in my mind over and over. "I know this is sudden

but, my parents wants to move to a bigger house. The house they pick out is 15km

away from where we are now. I hope you're okay with this." He asked.

I hesitated for a moment and replied "I'm fine, you didn't have to make sure." I pretended to smiled.

"So, not you're upset at all?" "No, of course I am. I'll miss being able to see you and

calling you a dork, but we both have strict parents, so what can you do? I should go

home now. It's getting kind of late. Well, see you!" I got up and ran away as fast and my

legs could take me. I prayed he didn't see my tears shredding. I heard him call out to

me but I kept running till I got home. I knock down my bedroom door and jumped onto

my bed wiping away my tears saying,

"No, I'm not okay, but I have to be. So then why? Why am I like this? I love you, so

much. Why couldn't I say that to you? Why did I hesitate each time I tried to tell you?

Even if I did tell you now, what use would it be? What would have you done?"

I turned over to reach for the photo of the two from our trip to the snow. I kept it hidden

under my black bed table. "I guess there's nothing you could do, so there's no point in

me telling you how I feel now. It's just I feel so lost without you. To be perfectly honest,

at this moment, I feel as if I'm on the verge of dying, because I'm trying to get adjusted

to the thought of our separate futures. Why am I even saying this? It's not like you can

hear me. Despite the fact we had always been besides each other for all those years,

fate had separated us. Our paths, no longer entwining. You, in the end were always an

extra puzzle piece that never belonged to me. You belong in someone else's puzzle. I

was fool no, I still am. I'm a fool to think we'd always be like this, next to each other

smiling happily. That gentle smile of yours made me forget the impending future. It's

now that I cling on to you, more than ever, even though I already know have to give you

up eventually, but still I wonder. Where will you and I both be standing around this time again next year? " I mumbled.