"Oh god, Lavi."
Lavi chuckles darkly, running his palms up Kanda's sides, making him groan and arch into the touch. His body felt like it was on fire, and not the bad kind of burning pain, but the fiery feeling of waves and waves of pleasure rippling through him. It felt so good and though Kanda would never admit it, he loves the way Lavi can have him moaning at every touch and the feeling of being dominated and utterly helpless to the mercy of the other - something that he knows the other knows all too well.
Lavi pulls back enough to grin at him. His lips curled in a smirk that is both dangerous and predatory, green eyes glinting tauntingly, sending a shudder down Kanda's spine. "Yuu-chan," He coos, almost singing. "Why don't you put that pretty mouth of yours to use and-"
"Lavi, I-AAARRRGHHHHH!"
Said person blinks in surprise at Kanda who blinks back because it certainly wasn't him who had just screamed. In unison, with a feeling of utter doom and cold sweat rapidly forming, the pair turned to the doorway where the scream came and is still coming from.
"I'M SO SORRY! I'M SO, SO S-SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN TO I-I-I'M SO SORRY! AAAARRGGGHHHHH! MY EYES! MY EYEEEEES! HELPPPPPP! I'M SOREEEEEEEEEE!" Still wailing with hands over her eyes and repeatedly apologising, Miranda ran off into the distance, her screams fading along with her.
Three pairs of eyes blinked after her, sweat-drops on each of their heads before Lavi realised that, wait three?, and then his brain finally processed that the other person standing in the doorway had snow-white hair and holy shit it was, of all people, Allen.
Judging by the groan from beneath him, Kanda had come to the same conclusion as he had, and damn where was Mugen when he needed it.
Lavi's hammer wasn't with him either - it had been taken by Komui to experiment on for the time being - so with no method of escape or, in Kanda's case, violence, there was only the straight-forward way of waiting for Allen to turn around and either run away or start teasing and this was going to be so awkward and embarrassing as hell.
To both their surprise though, Allen just looked straight at the two of them, not seeming freaked out by the fact that they were both obviously naked on Lavi's bed and doing - Lavi hoped Allen would be innocent enough to not know but then he remembered that Allen's master was Cross, worldwide womanizer, so there was absolutely no chance he would have any shred of innocence left (except the kind with a capital I) - ahem, stuff and calmly walked towards Lavi's bookshelf.
With a completely flawless poker-face, he seemed completely unfazed by the both amazed and horrified stares coming from the other two people in the room, kneeling down and rummaging through the shelf in search of whatever he had come to find.
"Uh...Allen?" Lavi asked nervously, getting off Kanda and hurriedly pulling his pants back on.
Allen had obviously found what he was looking for, piling a few books that Lavi recognised as history books on the theory of Innocence, which most likely Komui had sent him and Miranda to go borrow from him.
Allen ignored him, straightening up fluidly and walking towards the door. Halfway to the door though, he stop and turned around.
"Ah," He said with a hand on his chin, rather thoughtfully. "You two should probably lock the door next time in case someone else like, say, Lenalee walked in on you guys which would then cause Komui to hunt and exterminate the both of you."
"Allen...you're not disturbed?"
Allen looked confused, the very epitome of innocence. "Huh?"
"I mean," Lavi gestured at himself and then at Kanda who was sitting up on his bed with the blanket over him. "You do know what we were doing right?"
Kanda shot him a what-the-fuck-are-you-doing-baka-usagi glare that Lavi promptly ignored since it was basically Kanda's way of saying hello to him considering how often he was at the end of it.
"You two were having sex, right?" Allen stated flatly.
"And...you're not shocked."
"I've walked in on Master doing more disturbing things before," Allen explained, before deciding to elaborate. "I mean, once when I was eight, I heard strange noises coming from Master's room so I walked in and I saw him-"
"Ah, okay, okay, we get it, there's no need for us to hear it, right?" Lavi backtracked rapidly, looked to Kanda for support, who was being strangely silent which was unusual because when it came to Allen, Kanda was always ready with a hateful remark.
Then he noticed that Kanda was apparently trying to get his face to match Lavi's hair. Oh.
"If you say so." Allen said calmly and then turned and walked out. Just as he exited, he turned and added almost like a last thought.
"You should probably keep it down. Although I'm pretty sure everyone in the Order knows by now from the way Miranda was yelling just now. I'm sure they give your room a wide berth."
And with those words as a parting gift, he shut the door.
There was a moment of rather terse silence in which both Kanda and Lavi sat there and tried to get their minds through what had just happened.
"Everyone is going to freak out." Lavi stated after a while.
Kanda shrugged, not seeming bothered at all. "People avoid me anyways, no difference."
"You were blushing." Lavi pointed out, because he just couldn't leave a chance of making Kanda squirm in discomfort.
"Shut up." The other snapped, grabbing the redhead by the shoulder and pulling him down.
"Just remember to lock the door next time."
One-shot inspired by this random thought I had of what Allen's reaction would be to seeing Lavi and Kanda together.