THE MAGICAL STORY OF DEAN AND CAS ALSO KNOWN AS CASTIDEAN
Dean was just a sexy little boy in flanny. Sammy was his sexy brother. Cas was their fuckable angel. Probably gay, too.
The day Dean met Cas was a sexual one. Dean was obviously extremely hot from living in Canada - ah I mean America - and so took off all his clothes. Then HOLY SHIT an angel just bursts in and he's the most mother truckin attractive thing on the planet. Like, his eyes are as blue as a person's face when they choke. Obvs, Dean's eyes were as green as like grass or something.
Suddenly, their eyes had so much contact that they were magnetically attracted to each other and couldn't let go. To pass the time as they were connected, they made out for a good 8 hours. Then, naked, Sammy runs in and starts screaming, 'OH MY GOD MY SHIP MY SHIP'. He then steals Dean's clothes and burns them. He closes the door behind him and gallops away, turning into a moose/gigantor.
Dean realises he's deeply in love with Cas and so he decides to marry him while connected to him. Of course, Cas says yes because he's an angel and doesn't understand all the feels he's feeling.
While still connected, Cas realises he's having a baby. He screams and out pops a little bubba with one wing and one leg. Dean and Cas scream at their strange child thing. 'WHY DIDN'T WE BREAK AWAY WHILE WE COULD?' Dean screams.
'WE COULD HAVE BEEN DISCONNECTED? ARE YOU TRUCKIN SERIOUS RIGHT NOW DEAN PEOPLE DIED DURING OUR 20 YEARS TOGETHER I AM SO MAD AT YOU WE ARE SO OVER'.
And at these words, they broke apart. Cas then flew away and Dean fell to his knees, finding some clothes to put on. He cries for 8 years. In this time, Sammy has married 8 different angels and fucked over 20 demons. Due to all his sexiness, he is now made of gold. He can't help Dean. Dean is alone 5eva. No, even worse. 10EVA.
After another 340 years, Dean is still crying. Cas returns. Upon his arrival, Dean explodes from all the sexiness that has just arrived and dies. Cas cries for 2300 years. Sammy then walks in, naked, and makes out with Gabriel next to Cas. They live happily ever after, Gabriel and Cas sharing Sammy for sex for the rest of their infinite lives.