When William was a teenager he didn't have many means of escape from reality. Yeah he had his bass, he loved that fucking bass more than anything; actually it was the only thing that he seemed to love or even like. He lived in a small home in the worst part of town with his near comatose grandfather and with his over weight grandmother who spent more time in front of the shit television set in their out of date looking living room watching soap operas instead of looking after her grandson. She looked at him as a chore, he heard about it from time to time. When he'd been very young he'd started to wonder about his mom and dad, he knew his grandmother was his dad's mom, but not much else. By ten he started going through photo albums trying desperately to find a picture of one or both of his parents, he'd found photos with the faces ripped out and finally asked his grandma about them. She'd told him they were photos of his dad and a couple of his mom, but after the murder suicide she had ripped the faces out. She told the young boy that she didn't want shit to do with the man after what he'd done, she didn't want any evidence he'd existed; bad enough she had his son to look after. At such a young age he didn't understand it, he knew possibly too much detail about his parents death. His grandma didn't believe in decency or respect; she'd been more than happy to tell or more so complain about William's father around him. She never talked much about his mother though, he'd never understood that. He'd asked once about that only to earn a hard smack to the back of the head and told she wasn't good enough to even think about let alone talk about. She should have been smarter than to get with a worthless bastard like his father.

High school had been hell, being from the poorest part of town and having no parents didn't add up well. Neither did his physical appearance; his grandmother told him his dad had killed his mom and himself because he couldn't believe she'd fucked him over by having a deformed baby. It had obviously hurt the boy's feelings hearing that, feeling he caused his father to go insane and his mother to die. Even at school people talked about it, girls laughed at him, and boys beat him until he was crying or passed out from the pain. Only one time had a girl at school actually approached William to ask him out on a date. She'd been fucking gorgeous looking; she was sixteen but damn well developed with the looks of a super model. He had been standing outside of his locker; she had come up to him leaning against the locker next to his and smiled at him.

"Hey William"

The confused teen had looked around at the nearly empty hallway figuring even though she just said his name that it had to be somebody else, she couldn't be talking to him.

"Me?"

"Yeah of course silly, I was thinking...We could maybe go out on a date this Saturday, would you like that Willy?" She asked placing a hand gently on the boy's shoulder.

He felt nervous and had a hard time looking into her eyes.

"I...Me, you want to go out with me?"

She laughed shaking her head, long brown hair moving beautifully.

"Yes you, you're cute"

"Aren't you dating..."

"Don't worry about that, I can pick you up at eight?"

"Y-yeah that would be, that would be great"

"Good"

With that she had turned and walked away to join a group of girls that had been waiting for her. He had been shocked to say the least that she'd asked him out, that anybody had asked him out. She'd called him cute, smiled at him, and touched his shoulder. It was the most physical contact he'd gotten in his entire life. Even when he got beaten during math class it didn't matter as much as it normally would, an actual girl wanted to go out with him.

That Saturday before he left and his grandmother asked where the hell he was headed to he happily told her he had a date. She'd laughed and said he was either lying or somebody was fucking with him, there was no way that somebody asked him out. The comment had gotten on his nerves, but he let it slide; he'd show her. Somebody wanted to be with him for the first time in his miserable life and he wasn't going to let her bitter ass ruin that.

He tried to stay calm, not stutter, and even talk more clearly than normal. She complimented him, touched his arm or his inner thigh and it was fucking nirvana for a sexually frustrated and overly bullied teen like William. She had asked if he just wanted to go park near the woods so they could make out and he'd more than eagerly agreed to that. He tried to keep himself under control and not act like a complete loser when she leaned over across the console and kissed him. It took him awhile to figure out where to put his hands, where to touch her, or where she would get angry with him touching her. He had defined making out like a horny teenager; he knew he probably looked pathetic and over eager but she gave a moan and he felt he must be doing something right. It was the greatest moment of his life until the passenger side door was pulled open and somebody grabbed him by his thick greasy hair roughly yanking him out and onto the cold ground. He tried to scramble to his feet, but was kicked in the stomach hard enough o make him cry out in pain. He looked up to see two boys, one of which being the one he knew she was dating. Initially he thought they found out about the date, that they were pissed she was just in a car making out with William, but then he noticed them laughing even when they gave him another hard kick. He also noticed her laughing as she watched them kicking at his sides.

"What's going on?"

"What you think you actually got a fucking chance with my girl, like she'd fuck some piece of shit like you."

"Fucking loser, can you believe this shit?"

William tried to get up only to get kicked in the back.

"I thought you liked me"

He felt like crying, he was confused and hurt both physically and emotionally. She laughed at him, hand over her mouth to try and keep most of it in.

"I had to hold back vomit when you were kissing me, you're disgusting William."

"But"

Another kick to his side, "Shut up, you're so fucking ugly your face could kill someone."

"Yeah murder face" The second boy said laughing.

William growled going from sad and hurt to angry, he got to his feet before they could kick at him again. He grabbed the first boy by the front of his white tank top, he punched him hard in the face breaking his nose, and then shoved him onto his ass. The second boy went at him, William ducked then kicked him in the ass knocking him face down onto the ground. He didn't wait around for her or them, he stormed off walking all the way back to his grandmother's house. When he went inside slamming the screen door shut behind him she'd looked up from her stupid news story long enough to smirk and say "I told you so"

"Shut the fuck up" He yelled as he went back to his room.

That was the first time he gave himself an escape other than his bass. He lay on his bed playing and while he did he wondered what life would have been like if his parents were still alive or maybe just his mother. Did she loved him, would she love him?

He liked to imagine she would never let people treat him this way, she'd protect her son, and never call him ugly. If he got bullied or beaten up she'd make him cookies and tell him it was okay, those kids were just jealous of him. She wouldn't let people give him shit all of the time, she would encourage him to get better at bass instead of telling him it was a stupid dream come up with by an idiot. He liked to think his mom would love him, she would support him no matter what. If he'd had at least one parent that maybe nobody would hurt him as badly as they did. Rumors wouldn't go around school about how his mother wanted to commit suicide right after giving birth to him, because of his looks. He liked to think she didn't want to die, she'd loved her baby. He fell asleep to that idea, a pleasant idea in a very clouded and self hateful mind.

When he reached his mid twenties he would meet a guy named Nathan; a large behemoth mother fucker. He'd met him at a metal show in a shit bar, the band playing was about as horrible as the bar itself. Nathan had stood near him both of them talking about how crap the band was and yelling the odd insult at the assholes on stage. At one point William had thrown a beer bottle at the drummer only to earn a threat from the vocalist to which Nathan responded that if the guy beat William then he'd beat his ass. It was the first time anybody had offered to defend him, they spent the night talking and drinking. Nathan wanted to start a death metal band, he would sing; he had songs written, but he needed band mates. He said he knew a guy from Sweden who might join, they just needed a few more people. That lead to William admitting he could play bass and within a week the two spent a lot of their free time together talking about bands, drinking, getting into bar fights with asshole biker guys, and trying to figure out what to do with their possible band. When their drummer Pickles had jokingly called William Murderface it had gotten on his nerves, but not like it had back in high school. He knew the red head didn't mean it in a really cruel way, they all insulted each other, but never pushed it far enough to actually hurt anybody. William had even come to call himself Murderface, he didn't like being known as the ugly one, but he figured it was something and besides when they got big he knew he'd be known for a fuck ton more than just his looks.