A. N.
Wow, it's been a very long time. I'm sorry I kind of disappeared, but I'm back and with a whole new story! I've lost great interest in my other stories and therefore stopped posting anything, that doesn't mean I've stopped writing though. I've come up with this little story here and it's the same old, same old with my BanSan stories, just better!
It's also the dirtiest BanSan I have posted up so far, so beware. I've warned you! I strongly wish that unless you are eighteen or older, you DO NOT read this story, it'll taint your eyes! Though this is the first chapter, it moves pretty fast, for me anyway. I tried really hard to not make it a PWP so this first chapter isn't bad, just be ready for later updates (if I don't lose interest in this story like I did all the others). And again, I'm sorry for my very long disappearance, I hope you enjoy the chapter!
Harder to Breathe
Chapter One
Art was kinda her thing, always was, and as Sango let the green colored pencil glide a crossed her page she was glad she had some talent for it.
It was calming, let her stop thinking about everything that was going wrong and instead focus on the colors and the curves that she would use to liven up a plain white paper. She glanced up through her bangs at the football field and dropped the green colored pencil onto the bleachers to pick up her black one, adding more detail to the stadium light post.
Her parents hadn't been getting along lately, fighting over the dumbest of things more than ever. It bothered her, it hurt her to see them like that. So she stayed after school, jumping the fence to the football field and drawing it the way she saw it, plain and simple, naked without a soul. It was dark now and she wondered if they even cared but it probably would have showed if her phone had rung. It hadn't. They were probably to busy fighting to even notice that she had never come home after school.
It was like her world was crumbling, taking the air and making it hard for her to breathe.
The sound of boots on the bleachers brought her out of her thoughts. She looked up, watching as a boy walked along the bleacher she was sitting on, getting closer to her and making it shake slightly under his weight.
Sango frowned once he was standing over her, a smirk on his face.
"Watcha doing?" he asked, jumping down before sitting next to her, bringing one leg over to straddle the bench. Sango pulled her drawing to her chest, it was nothing embarrassing just the football field but she didn't like him and didn't like how he was suddenly there, sitting close to her like they were friends or something.
"I'm sure that's the first thing you've said to me since the second grade when you cut off one of my pigtails and started calling me He-man," she muttered.
Bankotsu smirked.
And she hated the sight of it.
Bankotsu had never been nice. Since she could remember he's been nasty and mean and manipulative. As he grew older it only became worst. He had missed most of their freshmen year because he was sent away to a juvenile detention center and you would think he would turn his life around after he was released. He didn't. The only thing that changed was he no longer got caught.
And he wore black, almost all the time. Sango hated the color black, it was empty and cold, nothing good seemed to come from it. His left eyebrow was pierced, a simple straight silver bar bell as well as his tongue, and he had a cigarette behind his right ear.
"They still call me that by the way," she whispered. Never to her face though since she never really talked with anyone. His smirk turned into a lazy grin as he brought his hand up to twirl some hair from her ponytail around his index finger.
"Well, you're surely not manly now," he muttered, his dancing blue eyes leaving her hair to lock with hers. She slapped his hand away.
"I never was," she corrected. He shook his hand as if she had actually hurt him.
"Bitchy," he chuckled. She rolled her eyes and turned her head, looking away from him.
"Watcha drawing?" he asked. She pushed his hand away as he reached for the sketch pad pressed against her chest.
"What are you doing here?" she asked instead. She was sure it was well after eight in the evening, the school was empty, not even teachers were here this late. She was completely alone with him.
"I was bored so I thought I would vandalize the school a bit," he muttered as if they were talking about the weather. She narrowed her eyes, glaring at him.
"You really are a good for nothing," she whispered, reaching for the colored pencils between them. It was time for her to go, she felt like she was losing brain cells by just being around him. He grabbed her wrist before she could grab one.
"That wasn't nice," he said. A smirk graced his lips, dark and cunning. It was frightening. He grabbed a few colored pencils, blue, red and green and she watched with narrowed eyes as he snapped them and then tossed them over the railing that keep people from falling down where the football team sat, a few feet down.
"You're so petty," she snapped dropping her sketch pad and reaching for his hand to keep him from grabbing more but he just knocked her hand away and took black, yellow, white, and brown. She flinched as they snapped before they went sailing over the railing in halves.
He was doing it again, bullying her. She had enjoyed the years of him ignoring her, not even giving her a first glance as they passed each other in the halls. She didn't want his torment, didn't need it, not now when her family was falling apart and she had no one to turn to.
Nothing but her drawings.
And now he was taking that away.
"No!" she cried, shoving at his chest when he reached for more. He laughed at her, shoving her hand away again as he tugged on her wrist.
"Their just colored pencils, you can buy more, right?" he laughed. He managed to get around her, snapped two more. Orange and purple.
She stood from the bench and raised her hand to slap him but he was up too and pushing her into the railing before she could bring her hand down. She winced as the cold metal dug into her back, her wrist still held tightly in his one hand as his other hand went to her pony tail. He tugged and she hissed leaning her head back, following him, forcing her to glare at him from over her nose. Her free hand gripped the bar behind her.
"You've gotten feisty," he muttered lazily, his eyes wondering over her face, then down her neck. She felt herself flush under his gaze and he smirked.
"I wonder how far down that goes," he sighed arching his eyebrow as his eyes went lower before snapping up to hers.
"Would you let me find out?" he asked. Sango panted through her nose, God, he was scary. He towered over her, stronger than her, it was menacing, the power he had. He could do anything, he could hurt her and there would be no one there to stop him. Sango frowned.
There was no way she was going to show him her fear.
She was scared but she was pissed too. Who did he think he was, treating her this way after years of not even acknowledging each other? He wasn't a God and she wasn't going to treat him like one, she's not like everyone else and she sure as hell was going to let him know that.
"Go to hell," she spat. He grinned, his blue eyes dancing playfully, darkly.
"I'm starting to love your mouth. Makes me think that since so much can come out it can take a lot in," he growled. He gave her hair a hard tug making her gasp as shocks of pain went through her scalp, before letting it go. She sighed in relief, bringing her head forward and taking her neck out of the painful angle it was in.
"You're a dog," she hissed, pushing at his chest with her free hand when he stepped closer. His hand went to the small of her back right under the bar.
"And what does that make you? My bitch?" he chuckled, sliding his hand down to run over her rear end. On reflex she slapped him, but not as hard as she wanted to since she couldn't draw her hand back and it frustrated her because she really wanted to hurt him.
His hand had squeezed her butt when her palm made contact with his cheek and she pressed forward to get out his grip, she only succeeded in pressing against him. He pushed back, his hips fitting with hers as he licked his lips, briefly showing the sliver ball lying against his tongue, before his darkened eyes locked with hers.
"Stop," she whispered when he pressed more. He smirked before finally leaning away.
"You've changed since then," he muttered, stepping away from her. She sighed when he let her wrist go before glaring at him.
"I like it," he said and with a smirk he adjusted himself through his black jeans. She felt disgust curl in her stomach as he winked at her and then he was turning, leaving her alone against the railing with an incomplete pack of colored pencils lying on the bleachers.
Sango walked home in the dark, confused and drained. He had only been there a short time but he had affected her greatly, shook her to her core.
She hadn't been involved with him for over twelve years and now he was back to make her life hell. She hoped not, she hoped that he would completely ignore her in school tomorrow just like he does every day. But the way he looked at her before he left, that wink, it promised things. Things she didn't want, she only wanted to be left alone. What had she done to get his attention, out of everyone that could of showed up, why was it him?
When she walked into her house she wasn't surprised to find her dad laying on the couch in the dark, the only light coming from the TV. He had a thin white sheet on him which fell on his legs when he sat up.
"Where you been?" he asked, he sounded tired but it made her feel a little better that he was staying up, waiting for her.
"At school," she answered, dropping her bag by the lamp stand.
"This late?" he asked. She nodded.
"Yeah, I was drawing the football field," she said, she glanced down at her bag which held her pad and the few colored pencils she had left. Staying after school was probably the worst thing she's decided to do since that time she went to that party with Miroku…he had taken her virginity that night and she still wasn't sure about how she felt about it.
He was the only friend she had but he went to another school so it wasn't like she had anyone to talk to when she went to her school. She was alone all the time and it depressed her. Not many kids talked to her, they didn't bully her or anything, they just left her alone. She was fine with that, but she did wish she had someone to talk to during those eight hours.
"You're on the couch again," she stated. He waved his hand carelessly, falling onto his back again.
"Me and your mom got into it again," he sighed. She nodded slowly crossing her arms over her chest.
"Are you guys going to be okay?" she whispered. He sat back up to look at her.
"Of course we are, Sango. We've just been together for so long and we're kind of getting tired of being around each other. We just need some time apart is all. I love your mother too much to just let our marriage fall apart," he said. She nodded again before pausing. Should she tell him how she was just assaulted? She shook her head, he had enough to worry about.
"Good night, dad," she called heading for the stairs.
"Sweet dreams, baby," he said.
)(?)(?)(?)(
Sango walked down the hall, only being brushed slightly as she neared her locker. It was only second period and she already missed her color pencils. She paused in putting in her combination at the thought of maybe steeling some from the art room, she was sure no one would notice or care, the students didn't take that class as serious as she did. For most it was nap time and for others just an easy A to impress their parents with.
She grabbed her things and shut her locker, turning around to see Bankotsu walking down the hall. She frowned, leaning back to press against her locker.
He looked even more menacing than he did last night. His heavy boots sounded loud against the floor to her as he came near. His black pants were tugged into them at the ankles and puffing out some like he was in the army. The silver chains hanging from the hoops of his pants jiggled in a rhythm with his strides. Unlike his normal black shirt he was actually wearing a white t-shirt. He had one hand in his pocket, the other holding onto the strap of his book bag. She doubted it held any books.
He was talking with his friends but as he came closer his eyes locked with hers.
She pressed harder into her locker as if it would get her from under his gaze. She felt uncomfortable and as he drew closer she felt as unsafe and vulnerable as she had last night even with the different setting, even with the students and teachers around.
It seemed like time stopped as he walked by her, his eyes were hooded with dark malice dancing in their indigo depts. In that second he held her captive, glued to the spot with her hands in fists and her back rigid. In that moment he was a deadly predator and she was defenseless prey, it made her shiver.
Then it was over and he was passed her, out of her sight.
Sango went slack against the lockers with a sigh.
Now all she had to do was avoid him for the rest of the day.
She rolled her eyes and pushed off the lockers. It wasn't like she knew his schedule, so avoiding him was probably going to be harder than she thought.
She went to her second period, art class. Her release, at least here there was everything she needed. She took her seat, in the back and away from all the other students. She was probably the only one that paid attention but she had decided on a back seat, away from them so that they didn't distract her.
She gave a jump during the middle of class at the feel of her phone vibrating in her pocket. She sighed and pulled it out, keeping it under the desk as she checked to see who it was.
She sighed again.
Miroku.
It probably wasn't anything important but he never called her while she was in school. She rose her hand but Mr. Won just waved her off, pointing to the pass. That was his answer for everything, even if you didn't have to use the restroom. He didn't care where you went as long as you were back in a reasonable amount of time. Sango stood and moved around the desk, taking the pass off the chalk board ledge and quickly made her way to the restroom.
"Hello?" she hissed.
"Hey," he greeted. She rolled her eyes.
"Miroku, I'm in school," she grumbled. He chuckled on the other end.
"Yeah, I know I just wanted to hear your voice," he said. She slapped her hand against her forehead. He could have at least called her in a class that she hated.
"You wanna do something today? I'll pick you up from your school," he said.
"I can't, I have errands to run," she said. She wasn't lying, she had to go to Staples and get more colored pencils. She couldn't deal with not having an outlet while her parents argued, she also couldn't deal with the silence that came afterwards.
"Come on, Sango," he whined.
"I have to get back to class, I'll see you later," she said, hanging up before he could reply. He could be so frustrating and persistent. She sighed, but he was her only friend, the only one standing on her side. She shoved her phone back into her pocket and walked back to class.
)()()()(
"Hey."
Sango ignored the call coming from the black blazer, riding slowly along the curb at her pace.
"Don't make me get out," he teased. She rolled her eyes, her grip tightening on her bag. Her legs were shaking though and she wasn't sure if she was going to be able to walk any further before they completely gave out from under her. They weren't too far from the school though, she could easily turn back around and find a teacher, some one that could look after her until he gave up with pursuing her.
The car came to a stop and she closed her eyes, wishing that she hadn't just heard his car door slam shut. She really didn't understand why he was coming after her, why he was wasting his time tormenting her instead of doing something against the law with his delinquent friends. Did he really enjoy harassing her that much?
She felt his fingers wrap around her elbow, tugging her back. She turned around swinging her hand towards his face as she broke out of his grip. Bankotsu easily dodged it, leaning back slightly with an amused grin on his face.
"Fuck, your hot tempered," he muttered, licking his lips. She didn't like the way he said it, the way it came out his mouth like molten lava, hot and smooth.
Fuck.
He had almost purred it.
"What do you want? Why won't you leave me alone?" she demanded, her hands in fists at her sides. He smirked and his eyes left hers for a moment to wonder over her. Then he arched his pierced brow and gestured towards his car.
"Get in, I'll tell you," he said. Sango stared at him for a moment. Did he really think she would get into a car with him? She shook her head slowly, there was no way. His smirk widened but his eyes narrowed.
"Get in," he coaxed. Her eyes drifted from him to his blazer, all the windows were down and she could hear the sound of the engine as it ran. The car was black but the inside was leather, a light tan color. If she got in who knew what he could do to her, what he would do to her. But what if she got in and he actually did tell her why he was suddenly harassing her, maybe if they talked he would actually leave her alone. She crossed her arms over her chest, her mind spinning.
Get in and risk him hurting her or walk away and risk him never leaving her alone.
"Sango."
Sango's eyes snapped to his blue ones. That was the first time he's used her name in years, she was sure. It made her shiver, the sound of it coming from those lips. She took a step towards his car.
"Hey Sango!"
They both turned toward the street as a red car pulled up to the curb in front of Bankotsu's car. Miroku poked his head out the sun roof.
"Hey," he said, smiling at her before looking to Bankotsu. Bankotsu arched an eyebrow as Miroku eyed him.
"This guy bothering you?" he asked. Bankotsu smirked.
"Now why would you automatically assume that?" he asked. He sounded offended, his tone defensive at the same time. Sango shook her head.
"I have to go," she whispered, going to the passenger side of Miroku's car. She really didn't want to turn and look but she ended up doing it anyway, looking over her shoulder as they pulled away from the curb. Bankotsu was lighting a cigarette, his blue eyes on her. She sighed and righted herself in her seat.
"I told you not to come," she sighed.
"Was that guy bothering you, Sango?" he asked, completely ignoring her. She shook her head, lying easily.
"No, we were just talking," she said. He arched an eyebrow at her.
"What could you and a guy like that talk about?" he asked. She rolled her eyes, her hand going to her temple.
"Can we stop with the 20 questions, I'm starting to get a headache. Can you just take me home?" she groaned. He took her home, complaining the whole time about how they never hang out anymore. She's sorry, she really is. She loves Miroku, he's her best friend but when her parents aren't happy how could she possibly be? She just isn't in the mood to go out and have fun with him, she just wants to draw in her room, alone.
But she can't because she doesn't have any colored pencils.
She really did hate him.
)(?)(?)(?)(
Of course she woke to the sound of her parents arguing.
"That money was supposed to go towards food, Kira, not towards your stupid work project!"
"See! That's your problem, using that money helped me with my job, which translates into me getting a rise!"
"Yeah, weeks, months or even years from now!"
Sango sighed and pushed the blanket off her. She grabbed some clothes and headed towards the shower, there was no way she was going to spend her weekend in the house with her fighting parents. It was like every time they rose their voices at each other it tore something in her chest, it made her heart ache.
Once she was done she walked down the stairs and grabbed her bag before heading out the front door, neither of them even paused to greet her good morning. She rolled her eyes, stuffing her hands into her pockets as she walked down the side walk.
She enjoyed walking, she really did, it kept her in shape and it was a nice time to get a lot of her thinking done. It was just some times she wished she had a car, so that she could go very far away, she wanted to just drive for a long time until she was far away from this stupid little town.
She paused when she was in front of Miroku's house. It was about a twenty minute walk and the fact that she had walked there without even thinking was a clear sign that she subconsciously wanted his company. He had been complaining about not seeing her enough anymore, maybe she could spend the night and he would drive her home in the morning. She walked up the stairs and pounded on the door.
His mother answered with a grin.
"Sango, honey, long time no see," she said, stepping a side to let the younger girl in. She could smell breakfast cooking from the kitchen, pancakes and bacon.
"Have you eaten yet?" she asked. Sango shook her head. The older woman smiled.
"Well, please stay, there's plenty. I'm not sure if Miroku is awake yet but you can go on up. I'll call you down when it's ready," she said. Sango smiled and nodded.
"I'm sorry for coming so early but thank you," she said.
"Nonsense," she said before heading back into the kitchen. Sango started the stairs going into Miroku's room without even knocking. The boy was sleeping on his side, his arm tucked under his pillow and his legs pulled up towards him. She sat down on the bed, placing her hand on his shoulder and giving him a shake. He grumbled and rolled away from her, so she just tried again. This time he stretched and turned back to her blinking up at her like he had never seen her before. She smiled as she waited for him to come around.
"Hey, Sango," he greeted, rubbing at his eyes. She gave him a smile, a little blush coming to her face as he gently ran his hand down her face. His touch was gentle and for a moment her mind wondered to the touch of another, she wondered if the hand that had gripped her elbow could ever be gentle. Sango mentally shook her head, ridding them of any thoughts of Bankotsu.
"What do you want to do today?" she asked. His eyes lit up, a smile coming to his lips.
)()()()(
Sango wondered down the aisle, her eyes talking in the different colors, the paint brushes and crayons. They were all pretty, the lights and the darks, simple instruments that could bring almost anything to life. She stopped at the colored pencils, a smile gracing her lips.
There was only one place to go now.
She felt better after her day with Miroku, he hadn't even tired touching her during the night, which was a miracle. She still didn't tell him about her parents, though. Who was she to burden him with her problems? She frowned, but that's what friends were for, right? To express how you feel and let them know your problems, so that they can comfort you in your time of need? She shook her head, she didn't have to make trouble for him, she could get all the comfort she needed through the stroke of a pencil.
Sango paused once she had reached the top of the steps, her eyes scanning over the naked bleachers. This place was calm, she liked the sound of it when it was empty. The way the wind sounded as it caressed the metal bleachers, almost like it was whispering to it. But tonight that empty was filled with loud cursing and laughing, Sango groaned, her eyes going to the top of the bleachers.
A group of three were sitting atop them and she easily recognized the one in the middle as he concentrated on something resting in his lap while the other two goofed off around him. Her eyes stayed glued onto him as he picked something from what ever he had, throwing it to the ground, doing so repeatedly. She bit her lip, brushing her hair out of her face as the wind blew, making her skirt tease her thighs. As if sensing her he looked up at her then back down before quickly doing a double take.
She wasn't sure what made her just stand there like she was dumb, she should have left the moment she saw them, she should be leaving now since he discovered that she was there. Instead she was rooted to the spot as she watched Bankotsu carefully hand over what ever he had to another boy before he stood and jumped down the bleachers towards her. She choose then to turn and start back to the steps that lead to the ground and the exit of the football field, which would led her to the side walk and her way home.
"Hey," he called gruffly, grabbing her elbow like he had before. She tugged away from him as she turned to glare at him, her hand clenching at her bag as if he was going to reach inside and once again destroy her precious colored pencils.
"Why do you keep putting your hands on me, don't touch me!" she growled. He arched a pierced eyebrow as he licked his lips, almost like he was showing off his piercings.
"Let me ride you home and I'll answer that for you," he muttered lowly. She scoffed and rolled her eyes as she crossed her arms. This was the second time he was asking her to get into a car with him but she didn't trust him, she didn't like him and she was sure she would be able to make it home okay if she walked, she always walked.
"I'll pass, thank you," she grumbled once again turning to leave. He grabbed her arm again, this time tight enough so that she couldn't break away as he pulled her into him.
"Why don't you let me help remove that stick from your ass?" he chuckled, his eyes laughing at her. She pushed at his chest.
"You arrogant asshole!" she barked punching at him as much as she could manage. He grinned at her, his hands tightening around her slim wrists.
"Better yet why don't you let me get rid of that loneness in your eyes," he grumbled, his voice sounding low, almost husky. Sango froze staring up at him, her eyes narrowed before she quickly glanced up at the boys he had been with. They were watching them now, leaning back against the bleachers as smoke came from one's mouth. They looked just as confused as she felt. Her eyes snapped back to Bankotsu.
"What are you talking about?" she snapped. He pressed her into the railing, much like he had last time.
"You want companionship, baby, it's right here," he practically growled as he pressed his pelvis against hers. She could feel herself flush, she wasn't sure if it was his jeans but there was definitely something there, pushing against her. She stared up at him, her mind focusing on something else.
Could he really see through her that easily?
They had only run into each other a few times but he could already see it, what her parents couldn't. She wanted attention, she wanted more than one friend, she wanted to feel like she was loved and wanted. She just… She barely had any friends and Miroku, he had been enough at one time, when she had no one but now… Now he wasn't what she was craving, his attention just made her feel more empty and alone than she did before. He babied her and gave her everything in hopes that he would get more than friendship in return…
But could she really get what she needed from him, from Bankotsu?
Sango licked her lips and looked away, feeling her bangs brush against her eye lids as she did so. Bankotsu let go of her wrist to gently brush them away, an act that shocked her as he leaned closer, his breath fanning over her temple.
"Come with me," he coaxed darkly, manipulating her as he slide his hand up her wrist, his fingers going between hers. He smirked and backed away, tugging her from the railing and pulling her back towards the stairs.
"I hope those asshole enjoy my fucking joint," he muttered over his shoulder before he was taking her down the steps. Sango watched his braid sway behind him as he walked, leading her to his black blazer which was parked a little bit away from the entrance of the stadium and a crossed the street. She understood how she had missed it when she first arrived and she wondered if she still would have gone in even if she had seen it.
He surprised her when he opened the passenger side door for her, gesturing for her to hop in. She shifted her bag on her shoulder and then sighed before getting in. Instead of shutting the door like she expected him to, he pushed at her hip, forcing her deeper into his vehicle. When she met resistance he reached behind her, his other hand by her hip and one of his knees on the seat. He pushed up the arm rest and as he continued to advance, crawling over her, she moved back until her back touched the door on the other side.
"W-What are you doing?" she demanded. He gave her a wicked grin as he shut the door behind him.
"What does it look like I'm doing?" he asked sarcastically, arching an eyebrow at her. She opened her mouth and then closed it as a burning blush scorched her cheeks.
"I can't believe I never noticed before," he said, tugging her bag from her arm and tossing it into the back seat.
"Noticed what?" she asked lowly, almost a whisper. His blue eyes glistened darkly as his hand found her thigh. She placed her hand on his chest as he moved over top of her, keeping him at bay.
"How sexy you are," he muttered, leaning in to kiss her. Sango turned her head away, hating how she was already slightly breathless by his closeness, her face burning. He smelt like cigarettes and something else, something male and spicy, it made her heart pound in her chest while the hand on her thigh burned her. He sighed against her cheek, and she ignored the way it felt against her flushed skin.
"I'm not having sex with you," she declared sternly. He pulled away slightly, smirking at her.
"I bet I could change your mind," he said. He had a gleam in his eyes, like he was taking her up on a challenge, a determined edge to his voice.
"Your cockiness is disgusting," she whined, pushing at his chest. He smiled slowly, swatting her hands away before he cupped her cheek.
"Trust me, you'll be begging for my cock by the time I'm done," he whispered. Before she could say anything about his crude language he was tilting her head up and pressing his lips against hers.
Sango felt her whole body flush as his lips caught her on fire. She felt like she had just been ignited leaving her breathless and unresponsive as her heart thundered loudly in her ears.
A. N.
Well, there you have it! See, I'm not that rusty... I'll try my hardest not to take so long to update. Feel free to leave a review and let me know what you thought.
I'm so sorry to those who lost anyone during the 9/11 attacks. My heart goes out to you and it doesn't matter if I know you or not, your in my thoughts and prayers. God Bless.