Edward

Sitting in a jail cell is not how I planned to spend my Saturday evening. I actually wanted to spend the evening beating my family at cards but no. Emmet just had to be an ass and get us in trouble.

It's not like Emmet hasn't done illegal things before. It's just that he never got caught. And I don't know how he dragged Jasper and me into it. It just happened.

But now I was stuck in a cell with Emmet and Jasper, with Charlie stalking down the hallway where our cell was placed.

"This is an…. interesting experience," Jasper noted as he glared at Emmet.

"You guys didn't have to come along," Emmet said and laughed even though Jasper and I were giving him the evil eye.

How could he laugh in a time like this? Emmet had done three different crimes in one night! Well at least he didn't break his record of ten crimes in one night.

"How the hell did this happen?" Jasper asked as he banged the back of his head against the cell wall.

"Bella is going to kill me," I said and Emmet tried not to laugh.

I gave Emmet the finger and he just held up his hands in surrender. How could Emmet be this relaxed? We were facing criminal charges and Emmet was joking.

"Lighten up Edward," Emmet said as if we were just out for a relaxing stroll, which we weren't.

We were in a cell at the police station! And it didn't help that Charlie was the one who arrested us. Charlie was probably going to tell Bella and Carlise….

Oh my God! What will Carlise do when he finds out what Emmet did? Crap!

"What are the charges again?" Emmet asked.

How could he forget the charges?! He committed them all!

"And can you explain how I committed them?" Emmet asked.

Emmet knew what he did and how he committed those crime. He just wanted the satisfaction of us telling him what he did. And he would pester Jasper and I until we said what he aloud.

I looked at Jasper and he nodded as if he knew what I was thinking. Three crimes were about to be told in front of Charlie so I took in a big, long breath even though I didn't need it.

"Your first offence of the night," I said. "Was assaulting Jim, the guy that called you fat when he was sitting at the other end of the bar."

"He deserved it though and that wasn't as bad as the second one!" Emmet said, probably dying for the credit of breaking the law.

"Your second offence of the night," Jasper said, making sure that I had to say the third offence. "Shouting racist comments at Mr Chow."

"Oh come on! When you're Chinese and your last name is Chow, what do you expect? And the things I said weren't racist!" Emmet said in his defence.

"You made your eyes look Asian and greeted with the name that people shouldn't call Chinese people!" Jasper told him.

"Point taken," Emmet said as he nodded his head.

"And the third offense," I said as I sighed. "You yawn raped Jacob Black."

Surprisingly, I laughed and so did Jasper, followed along by Emmet. Emmet enjoyed yawn-raping Jacob and I actually enjoyed watching.

"That was so fun," Emmet stated.

"He didn't see it coming," Jasper said through his laughter.

"And the look on his face was priceless!" I laughed out.

I know realised that seeing Jacob get yawn raped was worth going to jail for.

I looked over to Charlie who looked at me as if I was crazy. I didn't actually care if Charlie thought I was crazy because I will always remember when Emmet, a person who I am not proud to call my brother, yawn raped Jacob Black.

"I guess this cell aint so bad," Emmet said.

"How not?" Jasper asked, curious to why Emmet didn't mind the cell.

"Because…" Emmet then stood up. "I yawn raped Jacob Black! I Yawn raped Jacob Black! Go me! Go me!"

In all my years of living with Emmet, I had never seen him happy dance and sing before. Today was full of new experiences, wasn't it?

Jacob Black being yawn raped! Classic!