Introductory Author's Note: I've been on a Fallout kick lately. That game is so rich with Easter eggs, references, inside jokes, and randomized events that it feels like you're constructing your own story with the freedom to go wherever you want, whenever you want. It is a really unique gaming experience, and I've never played anything like it. (I've never played The Elder Scrolls games, which I know are also open-world games.) A particular tidbit I really enjoyed were the Adventures of Herbert Daring Dashwood and his Stalwart Ghoul Manservant Argyle. Compared to the crap they put on television nowadays, their episodes were really well-written and classy. I would pay money to have them continue it. Sadly, it's only five consecutive episodes of awesomeness. In the spirit of those episodes, I decided to try out a series involving these two characters. It may get a little hectic, and a little out of character, but that's the fun of it since we don't really know very much about them. Enjoy the adventures!

Disclaimer: The Fallout franchise belongs to Bethesda Game Studios.

Chapter 1:
Seductive Stranger

The Wasteland was brilliantly lit aglow with festive eruptions of miniscule nuclear bombs. Post-apocalyptic existence was not necessarily a life of celebration, but tonight, it was the anniversary of the end of the world. The annual marker that designated the exact date, although the exact time remained unknown, that the bombs fell and ended modern human civilization. Although many individuals chose to perceive this odd national holiday in a somber fashion, there was a vibrant and optimistic minority that cherished the new fallen world. Their loud festivities caused the cloudy night sky to glow with mystical, toxic fumes. Despite only a minority of folk observing this national holiday, explosions were heard all throughout the Wasteland, as far as human settlement reached, and even in the wilderness, where a few wanderers lurked.

What a rare sight, the atmosphere burning up in the haze of superheated radioactive gases. Such a special occasion allowed the perfection conditions for a first-time date. After three months of anticipation, Argyle finally asked his girlfriend out to spend the night watching the atomic fireworks at The Overlook Drive-In. It was never dangerous on this night in particular, since Raiders took advantage of this holiday by secretly bombarding homes while the owners were preoccupied outside, igniting the air. Sure enough, it would be a calm and unproblematic evening. As soon as the sun set, the pair departed into the Wastes, arriving at the scenic drive-in after merely a few hours' journey.

All cars were non-functional, so they resorted to climbing onto the car's roof to watch the spectacle. Argyle lied down, staring up at the endlessly foggy night sky, and his girlfriend, Ronnie, lied beside him with her balding head resting gently against his shoulder. Perhaps with the most ironic timing ever, the bombs shot high into the sky, erupting into colorful bursts of lethal radioactivity. The ghoul couple, immune to radiation, would not suffer ill effects from this event, unlike the foolish human residents who would participate and suffer from radiation burns for the rest of the night. They were silent for the first two hours, until finally Argyle worked up the courage to have a romantic conversation.

"You're as pretty as the soft green glow of uranium." Argyle cooed, delicately brushing his bony fingers against Ronnie's skull. She smiled gently, leaning into him closer, with her tiny skeletal hands tucked above her heart. "You're the floating ember of destiny, emitting light into the darkness, and because of you, now I see..." He said in a deep, soothing voice, cradling her in his firm arms.

"Argyle, you're so charming..." She whispered into the side of his skull, where his ear once was. "I think that this something really special. I wonder if any two people in the Wastes are as happy as we are..." She said softly, now placing her small hands atop his thick chest. She could now hear the faint rhythm of his heartbeat, so tranquil that it almost drifted her into dreamland.

"INCOMIIIIIIING!" An abrupt yell distracted the pair, both of them turning their heads to see someone bolting towards them. In a panicked and protective instinct, Argyle reacted very quickly. He held tightly onto Ronnie, and threw her off of the car, standing up in a defensive and tactical position to defend himself, and indirectly her as well. To his surprise, before he could throw a single punch, the silhouette had mercilessly tackled him off the vehicle, causing them to both land rather violently onto the pavement. It didn't help that the man landed on top of Argyle, so he broke his fall, with injurious consequences. The man was seemingly unharmed, but Argyle couldn't breathe momentarily.

Argyle coughed up blood, "The hell's wrong with you?" He exclaimed, using the back of his hand to wipe the blood of his mouth.

"Pardon, my unacquainted stranger." The cloaked man said, standing to his feet. "I am terribly sorry about interrupting, but this looks like a job for me... Herbert Daring Dashwood!" That nice top hat concealed his face, and the trench-coat he wore decided to drape heroically in the wind the moment he acclaimed his name.

...

Before resorting to questions about the dorky name, Argyle yelled, "What job!?"

"This job, my dear sir." Dashwood pointed out to the distance, revealing three galloping shadows fiercely running towards them. "The job in which I save you and the lady from the horrifying cannibalistic Raiders! Stand back, things are about to get dirty!" With that, the self-proclaimed Herbert Daring Dashwood took off at a frightening pace, storming towards the armed band of hooligans.

Argyle stared blankly. A small coughing sound averted his attention, and he had a sudden panicked concern for the safety of Ronnie. "Baby, you okay?" Argyle called out to the small ghoul on the ground. She hadn't moved since he had thrown her - oops, he probably shouldn't have done that, considering how frail she looked. However, he had thrown her, so that she would be further from the explosion, if the man decided to shoot at the car.

"I'm fine." Ronnie finally coughed, hacking up blood herself. Accursed ghoul anatomy was unfortunately fragile, due to relentless aging and persistent health problems. Her gasps sounded strained and forced, "You were trying to save me. Thank you..." Thank god that she was the forgiving type.

"Stay still, baby, I'm coming." Argyle assured her, staggering to his knees, trying to get himself upright despite taking that nasty fall. "I'll be over there, I just need to do something really quick. I gotta take care of these Raiders first."

"Raiders?" She said weakly. "You said there would be no Raiders here..."

"Looks like they followed this damned fool straight to us." Argyle grimaced, pointing angrily to the man, who was currently getting a beat-down by a wily Raider wielding a combat knife. "Doesn't look like he can solve his own problems, so... I'll be right back. I'm sorry, baby!" He said, picking up his pace, from a slow walk to a limped run. As he regained feeling to his legs, his gaze sharpened, and his eyes were more accustomed to the darkness, after being partially blinded from the nighttime show.

"Yeah, tear him apart!" The last remaining Raider cried gleefully, stabbing the living wits out of Dashwood. She seemed to be enjoying her hack job, especially since Dashwood was no longer putting up a fight. What an easy kill!

"I'm sorry, it's just that I..." Dashwood tried saying in-between repeated stabs to the abdomen. "I... I prefer to not tarnish a women's face... especially not a pretty woman." A single tear streaked down his face. Suddenly, with a swift jab movement, the Raider's head exploded, causing bits of blood and brains to rain down all over Dashwood. He let out a high-pitched scream of horror, staring with trauma at the gruesome remains of the attractive Raider.

"Thanks for attempting to save my life." Argyle said somewhat ungratefully, because he was more pissed that his perfect date had been ruined. He held out his hand to help Dashwood up, "Now I've repaid my debt by legitimately saving yours." Dashwood had the most pitiful puppy-dog frown, a blend of trauma and guilt, witnessing the gory death of a pretty female. He didn't take Argyle's hand. He just stared, on the verge of tears, and it was only in that moment that Argyle had a good look at his face. "Huh, don't you look different?" Argyle said aloud, analyzing this Herbert's facial features, particularly his pronounced and unshaven beard. "Herbert was your name?"

"I beg your pardon?" Dashwood blinked several times in a row, dwindling on the edge of being offended. "Herbert? HERBERT?" He quickly stood up, staring Argyle right in the eye, mostly because they were both about the same height. "Herbert. Daring. Dashwood." He pronounced each part of his name audibly and clearly.

"Jeez, sorry." Argyle half-heartedly apologized, putting his hands up.

Suddenly, Dashwood was running past him. Argyle turned around in confusion - this unpredictable fellow seemed to love spontaneity. Argyle glanced in the direction that he was running to, and it was to the small ghoul on the ground. It suddenly occurred to him that Dashwood was actually genuinely concerned about Ronnie. Argyle knew she was fine, or at least she said she was - he would definitely trust her word above all else. He paced back to her at a snail crawl, because he wasn't used to the rough action he just partook in, so his heart was pounding very loud in his ears. His chest hurt from the adrenaline rush, and a clasped bony hand rested over it, as if it was trying to keep his heart inside his ribcage. "I'm sorry about all this, Ronnie..." Argyle panted. "Baby, I'm coming..."

He glanced up, and he saw Dashwood helping Ronnie to her feet. She was staggering, but he was allowing her to bear her weight on him, in order to regain her balance. "Everything's going to be okay..." Argyle breathed in a raspy tone, "I'm here..." From the corner of his eye, he saw Dashwood engaged in a conversation with his girlfriend. Dashwood seemed to be genuinely caring, examining her freshly made scratches, and gently holding her bruised arms. He seemed to be getting a bit close to Ronnie, which Argyle passively dismissed... that is until he kissed her. Wait, WHAT?

At that point, Argyle had stopped in his tracks. He stared in confusion, his jaw hung open, and he was pleading that his eyes were playing tricks on him. Oh no, unfortunately, they weren't. Ronnie threw her arms around Dashwood's shoulders, pulling herself closer to him, her leg lifting up in ecstasy. A spark of jealousy ignited in Argyle's heart. Not even he had a first kiss with her. Damn it! "DASHWOOD!" Argyle cried with a broken heart.

Author's Note: That's my playful take on the first time that Herbert Daring Dashwood and Argyle met. I got inspiration for this, because Herbert Daring Dashwood himself, in the game, said that he met Argyle by accidentally stealing his girlfriend. From that point, they were best friends ever since. However, to amp up the drama, I left it with this cliffhanger, to show how the friendship budded out of this heartbreaking incident. (Wouldn't you be heartbroken if Dashwood stole your girlfriend?) I may tinker around with the chapters, but I'll definitely update if I make a major improvement. Thanks for the read! More chapters to come.