Sherlock was about to start a new paragraph on his blog, when he heard footsteps approaching the door to the flat.
"I had a great time tonight, I really enjoyed myself!" It was John's voice behind the door, perkier than usual.
"Me too." A deep, seductive female voice, and then kissing noises.
"I'll see you on Thursday for lunch, then?" John asked.
"Definitely. Thank you for a wonderful evening. See you, John."
A moment later, John opened the front door to see Sherlock staring stiffly at him, expressionless. Taken a bit aback, John turned to hang up his cloak.
"Oh, hi Sherlock."
Sherlock's face suddenly softened. "Hi, John." Pause. "How was your date?"
John turned to face him, a suspicious look in his eyes. He recovered in a heart beat.
"Yeah, it was fine. Great, actually. We had a blast. We saw Truthfully Yours and had a delicious dinner at an Italian restaurant. How was your evening?"
"Good. She's married, you know," Sherlock said casually, in one breath.
"Uh, what do you mean she's married?" he asked slowly, his eyebrows furrowing together.
"I mean she's married to a brain surgeon who hardly spends enough time with her, so she goes out with you to kill time and feel good about herself. Oh, and she's an alcoholic so I would advise leaving her immediately, before it gets any messier."
"What the hell!" John shouted. "How can you know that? You haven't even seen her before!" A thought hit him and he cocked his head- "or have you?"
Sherlock looked amused. "I got immensely bored and searched her on google, John. I found her facebook profile. Photos can tell you so much about people."
He quickly added, "I would never get that bored to stalk you on your dates." He typed a couple of words speedily and pressed enter.
"And I suppose you saw a picture of her standing drunk next to a brain surgeon with the caption- 'my husband doesn't spend enough time with me?'" John said sarcastically.
"Wall posts. Use your brain, John. Think!" Sherlock commanded, tapping his head.
John froze. "She told me she doesn't have a facebook account."
"She blocked you, of course. Wouldn't want you to ruin all of her fun."
"Yeah. Um, why did you ask about how my date went, anyway? That's not typical Sherlock behaviour."
"I wasn't going to, but I decided to try being polite for once."
"That was you being polite? Jesus, I hate to break it to you but you couldn't be polite even if you tried!"
Exasperated, Sherlock threw his hands in the air. "Fine, I won't try to be polite! Screw it."
John had never heard Sherlock say that before. "Um… been watching much crap telly?" Sherlock nodded sheepishly in reply.
A thought suddenly bubbled from John's subconscious. "That would make her a cheater!" He muttered angrily under his breath.
"What?"
"Nothing…What were you doing, investigating my… umm Maria?"
"I told you, I was very bored."
John gestured to the wall with a painted smiley face on it, a defiant look on his face. "What about the wall. Didn't it have it coming tonight?"
"I was extraordinarily bored. The problem with being bored is that when you finally find something to do that takes some of the boredom away, the activity itself starts to bore you. Habituation." Sherlock said it as if he was talking to a naive child.
"And what are you doing now?" John asked firmly.
"I got an email from someone accused of being a murderer, and now I'm doing research," Sherlock replied evenly.
"Okay… so why didn't you tell me earlier?"
Sherlock looked surprised. "You don't usually care about what I am doing."
"Huh? …Oh no, no about her being…you know…" John trailed off.
"Oh, I didn't know her name earlier."
"I'm sure I told you!"
"No- you said a lady from work. Then, your girlfriend. It was only the note that you left saying 'Sorry about cancelling tonight, having dinner and a movie with Maria' that I knew," Sherlock answered, accurately mimicking John's voice in the note.
John breathed a long-suffering sigh. "Oh god. I can't believe Maria would do this to me. I would never have suspected it. She seemed like such an honest person."
Sherlock couldn't resist a sharp exhale. "And you've been on five dates with her, haven't you?" he asked incredulously.
"Six," John said, deflated.
Sherlock looked curiously at John and then at back at the computer screen.
"Well… good thing you didn't sleep with her. I know how much you hate cheaters," he said innocently.
John dragged his eyes from Sherlock to the couch. "Um. Right, yeah. That's a relief."
Sherlock's eyes flickered to John's face.
"Mmmh."
John recognised that tone, but he didn't want to pursue it. He walked a few tense steps to his room before he had to turn around.
"Am I that transparent?"
"Like glass," came the terse reply. His eyes never left the screen.
John shut the bedroom door and lay on his bed. Closing his eyes, he could feel guilt hang over him like a dark grey cloud. Suddenly, he forgot all about his guilt. He snapped his eyes open as he remembered something or rather, someone he had been talking about.
Irene Adler. He knew.
Hi! If you have time, I would appreciate a review, anything that you liked/disliked. Or anything that tickles your fancy. Comments are awesome and I might feel more inclined to write more about these characters =)