Okay. Since I don't really have any ideas on how to continue my other fanfiction stories, I decided I might as well created a new one(what genius!). This story is just full of insanity and probably won't even have a plot. It's just something to take my mind off life's troubles(doesn't that sound like a wonderful excuse to go nuts?).

Warning: reading the following may cause stomach upsets, uncontrollable head banging, the death of the planet Saturn and a sudden unexplainable urge to repeat the word "pie".

Enjoy!

Her blonde hair blew to a silent melody in the wind, as she stood by the cold, blue sea, waiting for her lost hero to come home. Her heart throbbed as it called out fruitlessly to its other half that was no where to be found. A stray tear streaked down her cheek, making its way down to embrace the cold sand. Her-

"Cut! That's a wrap!"

"Say what?" Annabeth exclaimed as she turned around to find out who irritatingly interrupted her emotional moment. He was going down. Time to meet my friend Rocketlauncher, dear stranger.

"I said "it's a wrap". Time to head back to your cabin, blondie. Show's over. Shocked at how well you could produce those tears and all but the way you stare at the sea's a bit too creepy, like you think the waves are really gonna form into your lost hero or something. Can't have anything too real, right? It'll just freak out the audience. Next!" The weird bald guy with the words director painted on his face said.

"Who are you and what the freak are you doing here?" Annabeth demanded as her hand crept to her side pocket where she kept a rubber band. Uh oh. Those hurt. "Falling into depression over my missing boyfriend is hard enough without you and your...camera crew disrupting." She waved towards the one-legged duck holding a phone camera who looked like it was about to topple into the water.

"Edward Brandon T. Hovenputt! Stop fooling around!" The director screamed at the waddling duck.

"Quack!"

"Edward, I don't care if the sun rays reflected off the water makes your feathers sparkle. Enough or I'm gonna roast you!"

The duck reluctantly moved away from the sea and came to stand inches away from the distraught Annabeth. Due to problems raised concerning height, the duck used the camera to zoom up on Annabeth's shoe laces instead.

"Leave me alone! All I wanna do is find Percy!" Annabeth said as she broke into uncontrollable sobs which although unlikely of her, was what the writer wanted since she'd just learnt that phrase at 8-year-old writing class."Break into uncontrollable sobs". Discovery of the century. Next up, international literary prize!

"Oh hey there, Annabeth." Percy said as he walked out of the forest and onto the beach next to his girlfriend while busy licking a blue cheese ice-cream(EVERYTHING! Everything must be blue! Forget the taste buds!).

"Percy?"

"Nah. It's Larry now."

"Percy!"

"Oh fine. Guess it's more unique anyway."

Annabeth embraced her boyfriend and gave him a kiss so full of longing and heartbreak, so full of intense passion, that a small fire broke out in the area of the forest closest to them. Of course, they were so caught up with trying to peel off each other's clothes they failed to detect the smoke and hear the agonized swearing of the trees. (Exact swearing not included in story for sake of Mother Nature's dignity. And the fact that she'll send her minions after me if I do. Trees! Sunflowers! Dirt! They burn!)

"So..."Annabeth muttered, barely breaking off from the kiss, "Where were you? Thought you were dead?"

"Nah. But someone brought me to the Sahara desert and erased my memory. I don't even know who Sally Jackson is. Nor Michael Jackson. However..." Percy broke off as he stepped back from his girlfriend and kneeled onto the ground in a dramatic manner. "Your love was the only thing that shined through the veil that clouded my mind when it was plunged into darkness by a wicked god. It showed me the way back to camp and to the ice-cream shop nearby. It let me live! Now come to me, my love. Come and marry me and the birds and ponies and cuddly cute stuff shall cheer in joy. "

Annabeth, being a child of Athena already expected this but she pretended to be surprised as she stepped back, her mouth shaped like an "O". Yes, yes may the flies fly in and attack her throat and whatnot. Back to story.

"But what about Rachel?" Annabeth asked as a stick-man animation of her strangling the red-head, stuffing the corpse into a meat pie and then flushing it down the toilet flashed through her mind. Resisting the urge to grin evily, she felt something squish under her foot. Looking down to check if it was her conscience, she found a roast duck. Guess Edward got too near the fire. Wait...fire? Annabeth thought. Oh well. He's proposing. Dying while engaged...so romantic and tragic. Maybe we'll have our honeymoon in the underworld! *delighted squeal* Gotta ask Nico.

"Annabeth, no one else can better you as taking up the position of my beloved wife." Percy declared sincerely, "Rachel will be my mistress. Except for now, I promise you I'l keep it wonderfully secret. Now kiss me and take my hand in marriage."

Annabeth looked at Percy with joyful tears welling up in her gray eyes. "Ye-"

"Cut. That's a wrap!"

"You're STILL here?" Annabeth, hands on hips, stomped her way to the weird director guy.

"You two? Wonderful pair! Purr-fect for mi movie. The duck, the ditched and the director. What you say?" Director guy asked the stunned pair. Okay, so only Annabeth was stunned. Percy was dealing with his aching leg. Who knew proposals could be so painful?

"What I say?" Annabeth looked the bald guy in the eye, "I say meet Rocketlauncher!"

Her trusty friend, called to her side, appeared out of thin air and blasted the dude to a million pieces. His ashes fell over the sea as he always wanted to happen. When he died of old age, that is. Oh well.

And then Annabeth kicked the standing Percy(whose leg had JUST stopped aching) so that he was kneeling again.

"Now, where were we?"

"Uh...uh...I love you forever. You are my queen."

"Good. Let's get married." Annabeth smiled like the sun, lighting up the area. Or maybe that was just the bright fire burning behind her...but life and death can wait because love always comes first. Oh and corn too. Because this is so corny. Corn...corny...corn? Yeah. You get it.

And so they kissed again, the love in their hearts burning strongly, stronger than the fire they caused that was engulfing the whole of camp half-blood.

Oh well.

If your eyes burned while reading this, consider checking the contrast of your computer screen.

And yes, I know the chracters are OOC but in case you don't know already, it's on purpose. This is just a crazy story that may or may not be continued.

Reviews are appreciated:)

Chapter 1: The duck, the ditched and the director