Gilbert Beilschmidt was thrown harshly against the wall, kicked in the stomach so hard causing him to cough up blood and cry out in agony.
This was a daily thing for the Prussian to be beaten to the point of passing out into unconsciousness from all the pain; he wondered what he'd done to have these daily beatings.
When he wasn't being beaten, he was being used as a toy or an outlet to relive his Russian captor's sexual desires, after he would always feel like he was choking on the promise he made to himself and his younger brother that he would never fall again.
Each and every day that promise choked him and added to his growing torment.
Ivan smiles down at the Prussian as he kicks the Prussian over and over listening to the agonizing cries from the other; it was a symphony to his ears as he smiles more.
"Is that all you have? I think you can do much better than that da? Perhaps I should have taken your brother instead of you" Ivan says to the other smirking insanely.
He kicks the other hard in the chest breaking a couple of ribs and listens as the Prussian scream in pain.
Gilbert couldn't breathe, his lungs constrict as he gets the air kicked out of his lungs and he struggles for air he was in a constant loop always trapped in misery.
He now understood why he was always so short of breath now, the constant beatings and no medical care was causing his bones to pierce his lungs each time.
The Russian captor slams the door to Gilberts cell smirking, he always loved the feeling he got when he broke his toy and then threw him into his cell until later. "Oh Gilbert, I will be back. Do make sure you're not still bleeding by then" He chuckles darkly and presses his face to the bars of the cell. "We are the same, once you realize that the better"
Gilbert looked up at the other his head shaking for the beatings and says quietly and weakly. "I-I'm not like you Ivan, y-you sadistic asshole. …I-I'm everything you aren't" He then slumps back down against the floor of his cell unable to keep his head up any longer.
Ivan tsked moving away from the bars with a smile on his face as he mumbles to himself walking out. "We shall see about that little flower"
when he was left alone was unfortunately also left alone with his thoughts and flash backs of memories.
All I vant is to be with mein bruder, not to be here…I vant to be better. I vant to be better for Vest…
Huh? Zhis memory again huh...
~ When Ludwig and I lived together when he was younger, he was so shy back then and quite cute…how did it end up that way bruder? Ludwig and I were having and argument then he slammed the door in my face trying to shut me out, he didn't care about what I was trying to say to him, he didn't want to hear it. ~
I'm nothing like him. I will never be like him…
The hours of torment that Ivan would put Gilbert through in a day would have made any normal person crack long, long ago and yet Gilbert is still holding on, Ivan even used dirty handed tactics to try and break the Prussian man by going for the man's heart knowing that once someone's heart is weakened it is easier for them to break. But what Ivan could never have realized was that Gilbert's heart had already been broken and it could never be broken again no matter how hard the Russian tried, Gilbert injured it all until the time Ivan would get bored and throw him back into his cell.
I'm everything he's not… I won't be like him. One day I will hopefully never see that face of his ever again and I won't have to feel this way ever again either.
Gilbert at the beginning use to think that the darkness that Ivan would subject him to was his weakness but that could only go so deep, Ivan was just a meaningless diversion to the Prussian and that's all he will ever be. Gilbert's one and only weakness was his younger brother and he will always be Gilbert's weakness.
During one of Ivan's beatings Gilbert had finally had enough and had gathered the strength to put an end to all his pain, an end to all of Gilbert's screams and cries of pain that always sounded like a twisted symphony to Ivan's ears. The words that Ivan use to drag from Gilbert's lips that Ivan would of course write down in his special book which to Ivan of course looked like poetry to which was special because it was stolen, Gilbert was going to end this all.
The Russian captor once again slams the door to Gilberts cell smirking, he always loved the feeling he got when he broke his toy and then threw him into his cell until later. "Oh Gilbert, I will be back. Do make sure you're not still bleeding by then" He chuckles darkly and presses his face to the bars of the cell. "We are the same, once you realize that the better"
Those are the words he would always say to Gilbert when he locked him in the cell.
Gilbert looked up at the other his head shaking for the beatings and says quietly and weakly. "I-I'm not like you Ivan, y-you sadistic asshole. …I-I'm everything you aren't" He then slumps back down against the floor of his cell unable to keep his head up any longer.
Ivan tsked moving away from the bars with a smile on his face as he mumbles to himself walking out. "We shall see about that little flower"
when he was left alone was unfortunately also left alone with his thoughts and flash backs of memories.
All I vant is to be with mein bruder, not to be here…I vant to be better. I vant to be better for Vest…
Huh? Zhis memory again huh...
~ When Ludwig and I lived together when he was younger, he was so shy back then and quite cute…how did it end up that way bruder? Ludwig and I were having and argument then he slammed the door in my face trying to shut me out, he didn't care about what I was trying to say to him, he didn't want to hear it. ~
I'm nothing like him. I will never be like him…
The hours of torment that Ivan would put Gilbert through in a day would have made any normal person crack long, long ago and yet Gilbert is still holding on, Ivan even used dirty handed tactics to try and break the Prussian man by going for the man's heart knowing that once someone's heart is weakened it is easier for them to break. But what Ivan could never have realized was that Gilbert's heart had already been broken and it could never be broken again no matter how hard the Russian tried, Gilbert injured it all until the time Ivan would get bored and throw him back into his cell.
One day I will never see his face again.
Once Gilbert got out of this hell he was in he didn't want to be treated like a queen by some gentleman he just needed his brother by his side once more, he wanted respect and love nothing in-between that's all he longed for. He wasn't going to spell anything out to anyone since they can't see the horrors he's seen. He hoped to be back by his brother's side ruling Prussia once more, But for poor Gilbert he will never know that he will never be Prussia once more since other's think of him as not worthy and don't deserve to be a country once more after being captured and now Prussia is gone.
I'm everything he's not… I won't be like him. One day I will hopefully never see that face of his ever again and I won't have to feel this way ever again either.
The Russian captor slams the door to Gilberts cell smirking, he always loved the feeling he got when he broke his toy and then threw him into his cell until later. "Oh Gilbert, I will be back. Do make sure you're not still bleeding by then" He chuckles darkly and presses his face to the bars of the cell. "We are the same, once you realize that the better"
Gilbert looked up at the other his head shaking for the beatings and says quietly and weakly. "I-I'm not like you Ivan, y-you sadistic asshole. …I-I'm everything you aren't" He then slumps back down against the floor of his cell unable to keep his head up any longer.
Ivan tsked moving away from the bars with a smile on his face as he mumbles to himself walking out. "We shall see about that little flower"
when he was left alone was unfortunately also left alone with his thoughts and flash backs of memories.
All I vant is to be with mein bruder, not to be here…I vant to be better. I vant to be better for Vest…
Huh? Zhis memory again huh...
~ When Ludwig and I lived together when he was younger, he was so shy back then and quite cute…how did it end up that way bruder? Ludwig and I were having and argument then he slammed the door in my face trying to shut me out, he didn't care about what I was trying to say to him, he didn't want to hear it. ~
I'm nothing like him. I will never be like him…
I'm everything he's not… I won't be like him. One day I will hopefully never see that face of his ever again and I won't have to feel this way ever again either.
And how right Gilbert was when the Fall of Berlin's wall came crumbling down and he finally got to be reunited with his younger brother once again, the two embraced and fell to their knees hugging one another letting their emotions flow through one another.
"You vill never have to go zhrough zhat ever again bruder, zhat is mein promise to you" Ludwig says softly to his older brother.
All Gilbert could do was cling to his younger brother as he heard those words and cry into the other's shoulder.
Bold italics mean memories.
Bold means thoughts.
Please listen to Everything your not by Demi Lovato if you can while you read this story as it will make more sense if you do.