OK, I'm back!!! Amazing, huh??? Yeah. Well, a slightly darker fic about the Exile, who's name is Amanda in this, and Atton facing death…Hope you like it!!!
It amazed her. Completely stunned and mystified her. Completely. She couldn't see how he could do it, and it brought up another question. A question that she dreaded: Even though he could, could she?
Amanda sat on the ground, watching her friend, her ally, her Atton die. And she could nothing about it. She wasn't fast enough, they both knew that, and the blow might as well already been struck. He was as good as dead, anyways. They both knew it. They were both as good as dead.
But Atton was dealing with it better.
He was accepting it better. He was facing it better.
Amanda had to admit, she was surprised about it. Atton as the scoundrel, the drop out, the liar, the one who ran away from death, not faced it. It baffled her. It baffled her because it showed that, no matter how she acted:
She didn't think she could face it.
Death.
She didn't want to face it. But it wasn't like he did, either. He did it, though, and he wasn't going down without a fight. A good one, too.
Amanda just wanted to live.
She almost laughed at the thought. She had always been the strong one, the one with a iron will, and never gave up. Atton had always been the opposite. Now the tables had been turned it seemed, and she wasn't sure that the liked it. As a matter of fact, she knew she didn't.
Some part of her was almost ashamed that she could show this weakness in front of Atton, who she had always thought looked up to her. She wanted to be strong for him, for everyone, and even for herself. But she didn't think that she could do it.
Because, the truth was….She was scared.
The fear that creped inside of her skull wasn't fear of pain, either. It was the fear of dying.
It was the fear that she hadn't been good enough, or hadn't done enough things, or even that death was really the end, and that there was nothing left after it. Like life was her one shot-and it was.
She had called Atton so many names when he told her about everything. She had been hurt, and she had been mad. She almost had wanted to hurt him for hurting all of those other jedi. But that wasn't what bothered her, right now.
It was the names.
The names that she had called him, flung in his face like trash. And he had taken it…More or less.
Liar, Murderer, Bantha Poodoo, worthless piece of scrap metal, cheater, scoundrel…Coward.
Coward…Coward…Coward.
The words repeated in her head, even as the blow finally happened, even as he fell to the floor, and even as she held her dying friend in her shaking arms, the words repeated.
Coward…Coward…Coward.
And though Atton assured her,
Though he told her that she was brave,
She knew it was right.
Coward.
Ok, so I know it's been a while since I've updated, but I'm back!!!! I know, I know, stop wasting our time with these oneshots, well the reason that I haven't been updating is 1: because of life, and 2: because I'm working on my first multi-chapter fic!!! WooHoo!!! Rating earns you a cookie!!!!!