Miranda Lawson had never been so pissed in her life. How did she go from restoring the commander from a corpse into taking care of a smaller version of him? It all started when they were investigating the site of another location of where the collectors were attacking. Shepard had gone off with Miranda and Jacob only to get separated from each other. They managed to get on the collector ship, searching high and low for their missing commander. They found a pod with him it, but couldn't get inside. After being it back to the ship, they got the surprise of a lifetime. Inside of an adult Shepard, they got a much younger version of him.

Miranda didn't know what to do about it, so of course she had Mordin looking into it. In the meantime the Illusive Man told her to look after him while Mordin and other Cerberus scientist looked into it. She had tried telling him that she didn't know anything about children, but she would look after him to the best of her abilities. Of course beneath her cocky exterior and telling him it wouldn't be a problem, she was panicking underneath. This wasn't like the days when she had briefly taken care of Oriana before giving her a new home. This a wasn't a baby. This was a child that she couldn't just sooth with a bottle or a rocker or just holding him. This was a whole other ball park. She could give it a try. Hopefully Shepard would be well behaved child.

Miranda frowned. Perhaps she hadn't jinxed herself. She walked inside of the lab where little Shepard was getting blood drawn. Once she had gotten inside, he came over to her and held out a finger. "Elmo!"

"Yes I see." said Miranda. Why was he showing her this?

"I'm hungry!" said Shepard.

"We'll eat later." said Miranda. "We need to go introduce you to the rest of the crew. Well reintroduce you."

Miranda didn't see a reason to hide the fact that their commander was now a child. Besides, she couldn't just hold him in a room all day like a caged animal. Besides she couldn't have the people he brought on the ship to become suspicious about the commander's disappearance. And there was also the fact that they needed people to help out with the collectors and couldn't risk losing most of Shepard's team. Also, Tali would probably throw a fit if she found out her boyfriend went missing.

Shepard stumped his foot. "No!"

"What do you mean no?"

"No! I'm hungry!" Shepard crossed his arms.

"It won't take long, so..."

"NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!" he began throwing a tantrum, much to the annoyance of Mordin and Miranda. He sent her a just feed him already so I can work' look. "I WANNA EAT!"

"Fine. Just a quick snack." sighed Miranda. Shepard got off the floor looking pleased. "Okay what do you want?"

"I want...oh! I want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich!" said Shepard. "And some orange juice."

"That sounds fine." Shepard sat down at the table that was nearby the kitchen and patiently wanted for his sandwich. In no time at all, Miranda had come back with his food. "There you are."

He just stared at the plate and scowled. He shoved it away. She raised a brow. "What's wrong?"

He made a noise of annoyance. "Cut it!"

"Right." Miranda grabbed a knife and cut it diagonally. "There. Now eat up."

He huffed. Miranda sighed. "What now?"

"Wrong shape!" He pushed it away. She started to cut it across and Shepard threw a fit. "No! No! Wrong!"

"A sandwich is still a sandwich! Just eat it!" Miranda was getting frustrated. She'd never seen anyone get so upset over how a sandwich was made or cut. Who knew Shepard was so picky with how something as simple as a PBJ sandwich was presented to him.

"NO!" He started crying beating on the table. "I DON'T WANT IT!"

"Fine! I'll just ask for another...don't throw your cup!" Miranda snapped as Shepard picked up his cup ready to throw it. Miranda quickly asked for another one so Shepard would stop crying. Once she set it down she cut it into four squares. Shepard stopped crying and looked down at it. "hat now?"

"Crust."

"Fine!" She carefully peeled off the crust. Shepard dusted off his bread and ate a piece. "Happy now?"

He nodded in reply and munched down on his food. While eating up his food, one of the members of the ship came up to Miranda about a few things. By the time the conversation was over, when she turned around, Shepard was gone.

"Where did he go?" Miranda looked under the table. "Great he's run off. EDI, can you locate Commander Shepard for me?"

"He's in the medical ward." said EDI.

"Good he didn't go too far." she went inside and found the little boy playing in bandages while Dr. Chakwas was tied up with the bandages and some medical tape was around her mouth. "Shepard!"

"Hey!" Shepard waved at her before placing the bandages back on the table. "We're playing!"

"I bet you are." Miranda said as she took the tape off the doctor's mouth. "Are you okay, Dr. Chakwas?"

"Thank god you've found me!" gasped the doctor once she was free. "Those bandages were too tight."

"You were fine." said Shepard.

"You're not the doctor here, Shepard." said Miranda glaring at him.

"Shepard? You mean..."

"Yes. Shepard got turned into a child by the collectors." sighed Miranda. "We're working on a way to turn him back. Hopefully he won't be too much trouble though so far he's proved otherwise."

"I see. Well best of luck. To all of us."

"Okay Shepard, time to...damn it. He's gone again. EDI?" EDI then informed her that the little terror had gone down to the level with Grunt, Zaeed, and Jack. Miranda took off for the stairs.

There was no telling what would happen to Shepard down there. Jack was crazy and easy to irritate. There was telling how she would react to a child. As for Grunt, well she wasn't too sure about him. He was a krogan and a tank bred at that. She wasn't sure which one she'd prefer him running into. Hopefully he'd wonder around where Tali or Zaeed were.

As soon as she had gotten there, she saw Shepard looking down the stairs. "Shepard! There you are! Come here!"

The little boy looked up, grinned, and went down anyways. Miranda ran after him, but winded up on her back as Shepard made her tumble down the stairs. Jack, who had been busy looking through Cerberus files, looked up and burst out laughing. Miranda glared at her as Shepard came downstairs.

"Are you okay?" asked Shepard.

"I'm fine considering you tripped me."

"Poor baby." he kissed her forehead.

"Don't butter me up." she sighed. "Jack this is Shepard."

"Shepard had kid?" asked Jack looking over at the raven as he began poking Miranda.

"No he got turned into one...stop poking me!"

"No." He poked her again. "I'm bored, see ya!"

"No wait come here!" Shepard ran past Jack and then came back. "You're pretty."

"Uh thanks."

"But you're also bald. Grow some hair baldy." Shepard ran off. Miranda snickered.

"Shut the hell up. At least I'm not laying on my back. Then again you must be used to it whoring yourself out for Cerberus."

Miranda got up and searched once more for Shepard. He wasn't with Grunt and he had peeked in on Zaeed, but scooted off. She went off to go see Samara next since EDI informed her he had gotten on that floor. Shepard was staring at the blue woman.

"Why are you blue?" asked he poking her arm.

"Shepard!" She scooted him up. "He wasn't bothering you was he?"

"Not really." said Samara.

"This is Shepard." said Miranda as he squirmed in her arms. "Collectors turned him into a kid again."

"I was wondering for a moment if Shepard had offspring or perhaps a younger brother." said Samara. "If you need any help, I'm here."

"Thanks, but I have things under control." Miranda was lying out of her ass and Samara could see bull shit from a mile away.

"If you say so." She went back to meditating.

"Now for...OW!" Miranda dropped Shepard as soon as she walked mere inches away from where Samara was sitting. Shepard rolled and ran towards where Garrus was. Miranda studied her bite mark. Shepard had sunk his little teeth deep inside of her arm, penetrating just a little of her arm. "Thank goodness he doesn't have rabies or something."

Suddenly there was a loud scream and Shepard came running towards her. He grabbed her leg. "Randa! Randa!"

"What's wrong with you now?" she asked. She looked down at the little boy. He looked screamed. What had he seen?

"Dinosaur!" he whimpered, shaking as he held her leg.

"Dinosaur? You mean Garrus?"

"I want my mommy!" Shepard started crying. Well crap. Miranda didn't know how to explain to him that his was long gone. She instead picked him up and comforted him. "There there, I won't let the dinosaur get you."

"Promise?"

"I promise. Now let's get you to bed. You've been running all over the place today."

"Okay." After giving Shepard a bath, in which Shepard didn't hesitate to do at all since Shepard had his favorite bath soap in his bathroom, she put on one of Shepard's t-shirts on him and the little boy hopped into bed.

"Alright, night Shepard."

"Wait!"

"What?"

"Read me a story."

"Uh, I guess." Miranda searched for a few children's stories and began reading one. After a while Shepard fell asleep. Once he had, Miranda was about to leave when Shepard's lamp flashed on.

"Wait!"

"What now? I thought..."

"You thought wrong! Check for monsters!"

"Monster aren't..."

"CHECK!"

"Fine if it'll make you sleep faster." Miranda checked everywhere for 'monsters' before notifying him there were none. Shepard looked pleased.

"Night, night!"

"Alright good-night."

Miranda sighed in relief. She'd better have better luck with him tomorrow. The faster Mordin came up with a solution, the better.