Space, If That's What It Is - ******
I can't feel my body, I can't feel my hair brushing against my back, but still I know it's there. I also know there aren't any clothes covering my skin, if that's what it is. I know what's here. I know what's been here since I'm here, but, what happened before? Who am I? I know that I once knew my name. That I once loved someone, although I already forgot what love and loving is. I just recall that it's feeling something for someone you appreciate, something good. Feelings… what are they, anyway?
Now every Word I think of is one more question. One more doubt.
I remember that when I first got here I was desperate to find a way out of here. Then, I just gave up. I could cry before, trying to get out, and then I just gave it all away. I couldn't feel any more pain; I couldn't feel anything at all. I know I have memories, memories I can't remember, but I know I used to have a life.
My soul has been floating around for about 6 years and two thirds. I guess I'm about to turn 14. I would be about to turn 14, if I was alive. It's all dark. My body, if that's what it is, feels lost. It doesn't even move, it's just floating, leading to nowhere.
I am nowhere. I am nothing. I am nobody.
But, at least I know that I once was someone. I once existed. Perhaps the one who ruled the world (I believe people used to call him God) decided to hate me and took my life away, then left my soul wonder here.
But I needed to think about what I would do in the next 10, 20, 50, 100 years… I had to think about something. Or maybe I could just let my mind go blank. Yeah… that sounded like the best option to me. For now, that was all I was going to do.
And then, after 6 years and two thirds, there was an image. There was a… male.
Yeah, I guess those are called males, men, boys…
His hair was dark purple, and it had a spike, too. He had some yellow, completely gorgeous eyes. Then I remembered that I had a gift, I could see people's souls through their eyes. I –for the first time after such a long time- moved my body, if that's what it is, closer to the image. I looked at his eyes. He was a very serious, logical, egotistical, and emotionally aloof person. But deep in his heart, he was the kindest person in the world, and he would give up his life for anyone he cared about. He was walking, in a forest, with some other people. I tried to pull away my sight from the boy with the yellow eyes to see the rest, but it was useless, it's like he was holding my sight. My Eyes began to close, finally able to look away, still not able to look to the rest to the people. With the image, I was now able to distinguish left and right, up and down. My gaze was down, my eyelids were heavy. I felt like I could sleep now, it was like I was waiting to see that unknown boy all this time, and that I could rest until I saw his face, still not knowing who the hell he was.
My eyes were completely closed now, I noticed that since the image wasn't visible anymore, but there was light behind my eyelids.
Then I felt something; in my chest, in my heart, in my whole body, if that's what it is. I felt emotions. My eyes opened quickly, looking again at the boy, which wasn't moving anymore. Darkness changed into seeing some of my memories, he was everywhere.
Ren… Ren Tao. That was his name. Now I remembered everything, at least about him. I was glad; now that I was sure I once lived. I felt tears streaming down my face furiously, falling down to reach nowhere. I somehow knew he was alive, I knew he was in Earth; I knew that –unlike me- he was living… If that's what it is.