Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon.
Calem is not my life. My Pokémon are my life; any Pokémon is my life.
Maybe that's why I came back to Geosenge Town. I was willing to release my life if it was for the good of Kalos. I didn't have to live here since birth. It took me a few minutes outside my own door to fall in love with this place.
At first it was only the place, anyway. Calem and my new home were a package deal, exactly as he and Shauna were, outside my door day one. I never would've noticed Shauna next to him—he overwhelmed her with height.
She started chirping, though, and I listened un-intently. Please stop talking. Please stop talking.
Calem didn't impress me, either. He was blunt and boring and obviously ready to get out of there. (Away from me.) Shauna must have dragged him, like she drags me everywhere once we became "friends."
He didn't show any interest in me when I picked Fennekin as starter. He wasn't awestruck when I kicked Shauna's ass in our first and only battle. I assume she held that grudge, since she never offered again.
I got his attention for at most five seconds, leaving Santalune Forest. You beat me.
That's all it took. I was hooked, hooked by his praise and his kindness behind those clipped sentences and gray eyes. He honored me with battling at his side twice after that: against Trevor and Tierno, against Team Flare.
We fed off each other's progress, but never became close. I was still his "neighbor", never his friend or traveling companion. I think he let a compliment like that slip in the café. Empty.
My hopes were high when he invited me there. I noticed Shauna's face fall, Tierno giving her some nice words when my back was turned. Like I don't have ears.
She hid it well while we searched for Furfrou, however. She couldn't hide her glare during the fireworks. I hope we become really great friends, Serena.
Calem admitted to no infatuation on first sight in the café. He admitted nothing at all because there was nothing to admit. I was his traveling companion. Rival. Neighbor.
I wish I knew what they said, after I left to give my mom Sycamore's letter.
The longest we ever spent together was navigating Team Flare's base. I finally got all my wishes: battling alongside Calem, helping each other through the rough spots, finding the perfect sync. Us.
I don't know where Shauna found her invitation. It remained unspoken, but we all knew she was the weakest of the group. I didn't give an objection to her tagging along, since we were "friends." I didn't "notice" her glances throughout Calem's and my calculated dialogue, considering the battles ahead.
We were prepared. We would've been fine.
She saved us all.
She fucked me over.
"No-o-o! I don't like being chased!" Shauna runs.
Half the Flare grunts follow, taking the bait. The plan itself was genius, something I never would've considered. I'm not one for the coward way out. Calem and I could definitely handle the rest.
"I'm going to protect Shauna. You handle these." Calem runs.
Blunt. Ready to get away from me.
My team handles those left behind. Like I was. They don't need my instructions anymore, even if I had any to give. They don't need me.
I'm ready for Lysandre. We dispose of his team easily. They, not me. The Legendary comes, and I was prepared. I was prepared to do this with Calem, a failsafe if I fall.
I can pretend he was just my failsafe. I can pretend I didn't need his support. I don't need his love. He doesn't need me.
Xerneas's eyes never clear; it doesn't see my final Pokémon faint beneath its power. There were no witnesses to my downfall, my first loss.
Everything in my life has been a first. Calem was a first. Fennekin was a first. This is my last.
I was not enough for Calem. I am nothing at all.
"You are not enough for my beautiful world."