I OWN NOTHING. Except Mona. And the plot. JK Rowling, thank you for fueling my creativity with your plethora of amazing characters. Reviews are much appreciated! Please, it makes me want to press on and get better. Rip me apart, it will only help this story become a great one!
Enjoy~
Windows to the Soul
Mona's POV
Eyes down, Mona. That's what I always remind myself. Keep your eyes scraping against the floor of Hogwart's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. In class, keep your eyes on the board, or the book, or the test. Don't look at anybody. Looking at somebody would invite them in and I couldn't have that. I am the type of girl, that when the teacher calls on me, the whole class begins to murmur. I don't have friends. When all the other halls scramble to their dorms to meet their friends or boyfriends and talk to them up until the last second before the next class began, I quickly and quietly walk to my next class. I'm always there first, even though I always leave last.
I avoid contact with other human beings at all costs, as every time somebody speaks to me, its never friendly. The only time I interact with them is when I am required to by a Professor. I don't play sports, I'm not in any clubs. I am the type of girl you can't pick out in a crowd. The type of girl the other girls make fun of right in front of me because they don't even notice I'm standing there. I still don't look up. I don't speak up either. I don't care, because when I drag myself to the bathroom everyday during my Charms class and finally pick my eyes up to look in the mirror, I can clearly see they are right. I have pin straight, mousy brown hair that drops just to my shoulders, I dress like a 72 year old woman and I don't socialize with any of them. Even if it were just that, those three things, they would ostracize me anyways. I wish it were just that though.
The absolute worse part about my appearance, I think- as I finally pull my face into focus in the clouded mirror, is my eyes. My eyes have earned me some of my favorite nicknames "She-Wolf" or "Demona". My eyes were an eerie yellow color, which faded into a super dark ring of brown around the edge of my irises. I see where they could get those nicknames. My eyes even caused my church-going mother to abandon me with my father when I was around 6 months old and my permanent eye color started to develop. She swore I was the devil and even tried to drown me, but luckily my dad had come home early as she was filling the tub and beginning to push me under. Apparently, in her delusional mind, I- an innocent infant, was the devil herself. I don't even know what she looks like, but my mother's mom, who occasionally watched me growing up, considering my dad now had to work twice as hard just to make end's meet, had no problem telling me the story every single time I was with her. I knew she resented me too, for my mother up and leaving. Just by the way she would joyously tell the story, up until the point that my father came in and stopped her. However, I couldn't hate her as she did help my father greatly when it came to watching me, considering my father had nobody other than the two of us.
I grew up thinking myself as taboo, even thinking I deserved it. That I deserved to have my mother try and drown me as a baby. That I deserved to have a whole tuna sandwich thrown at my face during my 5th year. That I deserve to get my backpack stolen at least 3 times a month and all of my notes and homework to be scribbled on with satanic symbols and crappy drawings of wolves. That I deserve to be tripped at least twice a day. That I deserve to get shoved into walls. To be called a wide variety of painful names. To never be accepted. To be alone. To be afraid. To have to walk around with my head down. Why? I was born this way, I didn't choose it. Yet, here I am again, same time, same place, staring at the yellow orbs that have caused me so much misery. Hating myself to the very core for something that is completely out of my control. Wishing that my mother had succeeded in drowning me. Wishing that time Rachel Patterson tripped me down the stairs, I would have broken my neck instead of my arm.
So, after a particularly rousing session of self hate, I decided that I wanted to go home to the prefect's common room, instead of deal with this school for the rest of the day. I was just going to go there, wash my face and curl up on my favorite chair with Anne of Green Gables and fall into a restless sleep. So, I dipped out the side door and started up the path through the woods that lead to the prefects dormatory.
_
I hadn't expected anybody to be there. Most of the prefects hardly EVER missed class. I rarely did either. In fact, if there was one thing I was good at in life, it was school and being responsible. But I could feel my eyes throbbing from the recent spout of tears, along with my head and I knew that I wouldn't be able to attend class any longer that day. Not that anybody would have missed me.
I didn't notice the eyes that watched me as I entered the dorm either. I let out an exasperated sigh, threw my book bag on the floor and grabbed my book from the table. Unfortunately, when I opened it, it too had many unsightly and unfriendly doodles on it and a fresh wave of tears hit me. I whipped the book, in any particular direction and let out a frustrated growl.
"I'm not a fucking wolf! I'm not a fucking demon! I can't help that my eyes are this way. God, why couldn't I have died when my mother tried to drown me?! Why do I have to live this life, why can't it be normal? Why can't I be normal!" I screamed, fully believing I was in complete solitude. I slammed my fist into the nearest wall, again and again, effectively cracking the sheet rock, before I retreated up the stairs to my room, deciding on just sleeping the pain away.
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Blaise POV
I watched as Mona's small frame retreated up the stairs. Apparently, she had no idea I was there, sitting in the big black chair in the corner of the prefect's common room. My eyes dropped to the book that had skidded to a stop just a few feet away from me. Once I heard her door slam shut, I reached down to pick it up. At any given time, I could usually find Mona reading said book in the large maroon chair opposite the room from me. Not that I was actually looking for her or anything. She just always happened to be where I was, 9 times out of 10.
I found myself thumbing through endless drawings of Mona as a werewolf, demon, clawing somebody's heart out, killing multiple people and about 300 nasty comments regarding her. My eyes trailed to the stairs she had just tore up, her words ringing in my ears. I had never been one to participate in the cruelty that was displayed for the yellow-orbed girl. I didn't necessarily stop anybody, either. It was easier to stand by and do nothing, however seeing her frustrated outburst, hearing her desperate cries for the first time in my life, struck a cord in my icy heart. I frowned, putting the book on the table, before shooting it with a spell to remove all of the vandalism.
A particular set of words really bugged me, about Mona's mother. It seems she never once knew what it was like to be accepted. Her eyes, to me, were amazing and I had assumed that people were just jealous of her unique color when it had all started, but the pranks and rude comments had gotten far more worse as time went on. I sighed, rising to my feet as I followed the same path up the stairs that Mona had, reaching her room. I stood in front of her door for a few moments, preparing myself. What could I even say to her? Nothing. I was going to leave the book and turn to leave, when the door whizzed open. My brown eyes met her yellow, however she quickly dropped her gaze from mine, which caused me to frown even more. I decided against speaking, but I shoved the book under her dropped gaze and reluctantly she took it. I turned and started down the stairs, shooting a glance over my shoulder as she began to thumb through the pages. I watched as a radiant smile ripped across her face and she retreated back inside her room.
That was more than enough thanks for me.
_A Few Days Later_
Mona's POV
My favorite place when I was at Hogwarts, was Hogsmade. I could put a pair of sunglasses on and be treated like a normal person. I would actually get waited on, be able to buy things and the shop owners would not even bat an eye at me. It was a little piece of heaven. By about noon, this fine Saturday morning, I was ready to retreat back to the castle with all my new treasures.
I was about half way home when things started to go sour. I saw a group of Slytherins approaching me and I cringed. Out of all the houses, the Slytherins where the absolute meanest to me. Minus Blaise Zabini, who actually was the only person to even preform any type of kindness to me. I saw his tall frame in the back of the group and couldn't help the smile that came to my face. I regretted it instantly. Pansy Parkinson's shrill voice filled ears and cracked the drums wide open.
"What are you looking at, Demona! Don't ever raise your head in our presence!" She screeched, while Goyle effectively stripped my sunglasses off of my face. The sun reflected off the snow and I knew my eyes were shining even brighter than normal by the disgusted look on a few of their faces. I heard my glasses crunch in the snow and my eyes darted to Blaise, who had a remorseful look on his face, but wouldn't meet my eyes. I understood that his act of kindness before was only something he would do alone and not in the presence of his usual gang. However, my heart sunk even further than it ever had before. I felt myself being shoved backwards, and with a thud by body hit the snow and my head hit something hard. My vision was becoming hazy. I felt a sharp pain to my ribs and sides. I knew I was being kicked. Tears stung my eyes and with a final kick to my head, the world went black.
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Blaise's POV
Watching my friends assault this girl was hard to stomach. It was hard for me not to speak out and I hated myself for every second that I had let pass that they tormented Mona. I knew it wasn't of my social status to speak up and actually protect somebody, so like a coward I sat by and watched them. I watched the light leave her eyes and watched as my group of friends disappeared towards Hogsmade, leaving her body to die in the cold. Slowly, I approached the body. She was cold, white. I thought maybe she was dead, but the light pulse in her neck told me other wise. I swooped her up into my arms, ready to carry her back to Madam Pomphrey.
"You won't make it all the way there in the cold." A familiar voice ripped me from my frantic thoughts. Draco stood a few yards from me, with a skeptical look on his face. "Let's just take her to the Shrieking Shack. I'll go get Granger and meet you there." Draco spoke, before disappearing back towards Hogsmade. I made a mad dash for the shack. I set her down on a old bed, cringing slightly at the blood on my robes from her head. She had been hurt bad. I heard Draco and Hermione enter a few moments later. Draco and I left her to do her work.
In our final year at Hogwarts, both me and Mona had become Prefects, while Hermione and Draco had become head boy and girl. Draco, began the year as a selfish prat, like most of us in Slytherin. However, by halfway through the year, about a month prior, him and Hermione had began dating and he made a drastic change for the better. Now, he was the only bloke I could count on and I was so thankful that he was dating a future Doctor at St. Mungo's.
"Why are you so worried about Demo-" The look I sent him stopped him from continuing the nickname. "Mona I mean. Why do you care so much? I haven't seen you this worried in ages." I pondered his statement for a while, baffled myself. Why did this girl capture my attention so much? Why did I care that she was getting bullied so brutally? She wasn't my problem. I let out a rough sigh, already knowing the answer.
"There's something about her, Draco. I don't know why I care so much, all I can say is that I do." I responded, running a hand over my buzzed head. "Pansy and them left her for dead, what was I supposed to do? Let her die in the cold?" I know I was being defensive, but I couldn't come to terms with the feelings bubbling in my stomach. Hermione came out a few moments later, eyes pinning on me instantly.
"She will be okay, but she's going to have to rest here for a while. Draco and I are scheduled for rounds tonight, so we have to leave. You're going to have to watch over her tonight, Zabini." I couldn't ignore the lurching feeling my heart gave and I found myself nodding and sitting there numbly as Draco and Hermione left. Slowly, I rose to my feet and moved into the room where she slept.
When I actually got the chance to look at her peaceful, sleeping face I couldn't help but smile and think that she deserved so much more than how she was treated. I noticed that pail, pink scars on her wrists and frowned deeply. I had heard myself how badly she wished not to be alive, yet it didn't actually hit me until I had seen them. Dancing up and down her wrists, taunting me. I sat down on the edge of the bed, moving a piece of hair from her face. Man, was I tired. Soon, I found myself laying next to her, before slipping into a deep sleep.
_
Mona's POV
When I woke up, I had a terrible headache. Slowly, the memories started flooding back to me and I frowned. Was I still outside? The darkness slowly came into focus and I realized that I was somewhere other than my bedroom or outside. The second thing I noticed was that the bed was dipped and there was a snoring figure next to me. I let out a small yelp and stood to move away from whoever it was, but dizziness rushed my senses and I found myself on my ass with a loud thump. Said being woke with a start.
"What's going on?" A deep voice rang out and I swallowed the lump in my throat. I was about to speak, but he began before I. "Oh, right. Mona, are you alright? What are you doing on the floor?" Soon, I found the fireplace lighting up and the mocha-skinned man known as Blaise was sweeping me up into his arms and placing me back in the bed. "You have to rest in bed for a while, you've been through a lot."
I was speechless. Tears prickled my eyes, threatening to fall. I swallowed again, my eyes meeting his in the shimmering light of the nearby fireplace. Happiness flooded my chest. I thought he would have left me there, considering he didn't stop them.
"Why.. Why did you help me?" I asked, and he shrugged his shoulders.
"Because, you don't deserve to die in the snow before you even had a chance to prove yourself." I smiled at his words and he cleared his throat before speaking again. "But, you should go back to bed. I'll sleep over there on the couch, I didn't mean to fall asleep next to you. I.. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't able to man up and-"
"You did rescue me though, didn't you? You can sleep in the bed if you want. Just... no funny business." I blushed seriously hard, my words coming from my mouth before I even had the chance to think. He studied my face for a while, before nodding and climbing back into bed. We fell into a deep sleep moments after, his arm resting around my midsection.
A/N: I hope you enjoyed the first chapter! More to come soon! Please, read and review!