Phoebe's Songs
I do not own these I did not write these I only transcribed them I do not own the characters
New York City has no power, and the milk is getting sour. But to me it is not scary, 'cause I stay away from dairy.... LA la, la LA la, LA la...
I made a man with eyes of coal and a smile so bewitchin'. How was I supposed to know that my mom was dead in the kitchen? La lalala laaa la lala La lalala la la...
My mother's ashes, even her eyelashes, are resting in a little yellow jar. And sometimes, when it's breezy, I feel a little sneezy, and now I...
You don't have to be awake to be my man. As long as you have brainwaves I'll be there to hold your hand. Though we just met the other day, there's something I have got to say...
They're tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch, and soon they'll grow up and resent you so much. Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why, and you cry and you cry and you cry. And you cry and you cry and you cry and you cry...
And they found their bodies the very next day, they found their bodies the very next... la la la, la la la, la la la...
I'm in the shower and I'm writing a song
Stop me if you've heard it.
My skin is soapy, and my hair is wet,
and Tegrin spelled backward is Nirget.
Lather, rinse, repeat
and lather, rinse, repeat
and lather, rinse, repeat
as needed.
When I play, I play for me
I don't need your charity
La lalala lalalalalalala
lalala lalala lalalalalalala....
was the double, double, double-jointed boy.
Stephanie
knows all the chords.
Terry's a jerk!
And he won't let me work!
And I hate Central Perk!
You're all invited to bite me!
Now, Grandma's a person who everyone likes,
She bought you a train and a bright, shiny bike.
But lately she hasn't been coming to dinner,
And last time you saw her she looked so much thinner.
Now, your mom and your dad said she moved to Peru,
But the truth is she died and some day you will too.
Lalala LAlalala LAlalala LAlalala La La La La
Lalala LAlalala LAlalala LAlalala La La La La
There'll be times when you get older
When you'll want to sleep with people
Just to make them like you
But don't.
'Cause that's another thing
That you don't wanna do
Everybody!
That's another thing
That you don't wanna do.
Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo,
Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo.
Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up,
And that's how we get hamburgers.
Now, chickens!
Sometimes men love women
Sometimes men love men,
And then there are bisexuals
Though some just say they're kidding themselves.
La lalala lalalalala la
La la lalala lala la la
Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat, it's not your fault.
They won't take you to the vet.
You're obviously not their favorite pet.
It may not be a bed of roses.
And you're no friend to those with noses.
And a crusty old man
said, "I'll do what I can,"
and the rest of the rats played moroccas.
Jingle Bitch screwed me over! Go to hell Jingle Whore! Go to hell, go to hell, go to hell-hell-hell
Crazy underwear, creepin' up my butt. Crazy underwear, always in a rut. Crazy underwear....
Parading, goats are parading; parading down the street. Parading, goats are parading; leaving little treats.
I'm, I'm still waiting for my papier-mache' man.
I found you in my bed!
How'd you wind up there?
You are a mystery,
Little black curly hair!
Little black curly hair!
Little black, little black,
Little black, little black,
Little black curly hair!
It only takes two heart attacks to finally make you see…
One of them won't do it, but the second one will set you free…
Tell all your hate and anger, it's time to say good-bye…
And that is just what I will do, soon as those bastards I work for die!
La, la-la-la, la-la-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la……