Ok this is my first Utena fic. I haven't seen all the episodes (which really sux) so please bear with me on this. I'll try my best to make this a good fic and if you don' t like it I'm sorry. My main reason for writing this is because I like the series or at least the thirteen episodes that have been released in the U.S. My other reason is because all the stories I've read so far for ,Utena, have been really good and I hope that eventually more people will start writing stories for it as well. Anyways now that I've talked your ear off forever here's te story.
Is it Love?
It was a beautiful spring day at the academy. The sun was shining and all around you could see new life beginning to form. On this particular day Utena was outside eating lunch with Anthy. Chu Chu who had long since eaten his fill lay asleep on Anthy's lap.
" It sure is nice out." said Anthy.
"Yes it is." said Utena. Her head hurt slightly and she felt tired. She had woken up feeling this way but it didn't matter. Today was just to beautiful to stay in bed all day. Besides that she had had a test in one of her earlier classes and it wouldn't have helped her grade to not show up.
Utena looked up at the sky. Dark clouds were beginning to form so most likely they would have a rain storm this evening. She glanced around the grassy area where she and Anthy sat. Juri and Miki sat on a wall a few yards away engrossed in their conversation with one another. Utena figured they were talking about student council matters or something to do with the duels but at the moment she really didn't care. Nonami and her little fan club sat across the field. Once in a while one of them gave her a murderous stare. Nonami would probably never forgive her for defeating Touga. That had been a while ago and Utena hadn't seen Touga very much. She started to wonder what he was doing right now but then forgot about it. She didn't want to think about Touga and besides whatever he was doing it probably had to do with some girl.
This last thought hurt. She couldn't really explain the pain she felt. It wasn't physical but it still hurt like the deepest wound. She would never truly be sure if Touga was her prince on a white horse but if he was why would he do this to her? She just couldn't imagine her prince being one of the biggest heart breakers in her school. Yet she couldn't help but think of him as hers. These thoughts were all really confusing and just worsened her headache.
"Are you all right, Miss Utena?" asked Anthy worry showing in those liquid eyes. Utena felt a small amount of irritation. NO matter how many times she told Anthy not to she still called her Miss Utena. By now however Utena had given up hope of Anthy ever learning this so she simply let it slide.
"Yes, Anthy I'm fi-" she was interrupted by a yell and suddenly someone was on top of her.
"Hi Utena!" came an ecstatic voice.
"Hey Wakaba!" said Utena trying to sound enthusiastic. Today she wasn't sure she had the strength to carry Wakaba. Even as she thought of this she started slumping down under the dead weight on her back.
"Utena, my love! Carry me!" Utena still found it kinda weird that Wakaba referred to her as a lover but she was pretty used to it.
"Not right now, Wakaba." said Utena pushing her idolant friend off her back.
They finished their meal talking about whatever came to mind such as boys, cooking, dances and whatever else they could think of. Utena pretty much stayed out of the conversation. Normally she would have been joining in and talking just as much but her headache was worsening and it was starting to feel a little hot. Finally the bell meaning the end of lunch sounded and her friends left to go to their classes. Utena had history next and wasn't looking forward to it. She was starting to feel a little cold. As she was walking to her class she saw Touga standing near the rose garden talking with a bunch of girls. Utena paused a moment watching him. He looked like he always had and smiled while talking to the girls. Yet there was something missing in that smile it was almost as if he had lost something. Utena remembered how dejected she had felt when he had defeated her and for a moment she almost pitied him. He looked up and met her stare. There was something different about his eyes as well and she couldn't help but look down. She looked up a moment later and he was gone. A part of her felt sad and wished he would come back but there was still a part that was happy he had left. Utena tried to forget about it and once again began walking to her class.
History and Science seemed to take years because of the pain in her head. Even the smallest noises worsened the pain. If a bird chirped it almost sounded like a bugle in her ear and gossipy girls who wouldn't stop talking earned themselves a few cold looks from Utena. This seemed pretty weird considering that normally she would have been talking with them. At the moment Utena felt herself burning up as she walked away from her last class of the day. Her teacher had made her stay after class to talk about a test she hadn't done so well on so by the time she got to the walkway that led to her dorm it was deserted. As she walked Utena started feeling drops of water landing on her face and in her eyes. The pain in her head was unbearable as each drop hit her and she was starting to feel a little dizzy. Still she kept walking thankful the cool drops that spattered her over heating face. Her feet dragged and she constantly felt more tired. Finally the dizziness overcame her and her legs buckled under her. The next moment she felt the cold concrete against her face and did her best to wipe some drenched strands of hair out of her face. She wondered if anyone would find her. Someone had to find her she couldn't stay out here in this condition.
Utena made an effort to get up but gave up quickly, she was just too weak. She was starting to feel cold again and began shivering. She was completely soaked and what body heat she had would only last so long. She vaguely heard the approaching footsteps or felt herself being lifted into strong arms all she felt was the warmth radiating from whoever was carrying her away.
Utena finally awoke to the feel of a cool damp cloth being placed on her forehead and the feel of a warm hand stroking her hair. Even though she didn't want to, Utena opened her eyes and saw Touga staring down at her. Those eyes still held that foresaken look and she couldn't help but look down from his gaze. Her eyes scanned the room. Wherever she was it certainly wasn't her dorm room.
"Where am I?" she asked while moving her hand up to brush away his. Touga seemed to realize what she wanted and simply took his hand away from her without being forced.
"This is where Nanami and I live." was all she got for an answer.
"Why did you help me?" she asked and a ghost of Touga's old smirk appeared on his face.
"You mean why didn't I leave you out in the rain to die or atleast get hypothermia?"
"You know what I mean." said Utena getting irritated.
"I'll tell you in the morning though I don't think you'll believe."
"Why not now?"
"Just be patient and got to sleep." Even though she hated to admit it she was exhausted and try though she might to stop it, she slowly drifted off.
It wasn't a very easy sleep. Utena woke up more than once from a fever dream that had frightened her but each time she awoke Touga was always there soothing her and easing her back to sleep. Each time she woke up she always couldn't help but wonder why he was caring for her. Her dreams changed every time she fell back asleep. It seemed like there were a million and she'd forget them almost immediately after she woke up. Whatever dream she woke up from though it always seemed the dream had had something to do with Touga suddenly disappearing. Because of this it was reassuring to wake up and feel his hand holding hers.
Rays of bright sunlight woke Utena finally and she knew it was morning. Her headache was gone and so were the hot flashes and chills but she was still very tired. Utena sat up and saw Touga. He was kneeling next to the bed his head was near her arm and it was apparent that he had fallen asleep. Utena couldn't believe it. Touga had stayed up all night watching over her, making sure she felt safe to the point where he actually exhausted himself. Utena looked down at her hand and saw that it was clutched in Touga's own. She moved her other hand to his face and brushed some red strands of hair out of his face. He looked so peaceful just sleeping there and though she hated herself for it Utena couldn't help but wish he was hers. Utena moved her hand to touch his cheek and as her hands brushed up against his skin Touga's eyes shot open and he had a firm grip on her wrist. He seemed to suddenly realize it was just her and let go of her wrist. He pushed himself up off of the bed and started to get up. His face looked tired from the hours without sleep but still handsome. His eyes seemed different once again. This time they weren't forlorn and lost but they also weren't the way they had been originally. Somehow they just seemed gentler and peacful and Utena knew now that she'd have a much harder time not falling for him. But then again did she really feel that way? This was the second time he had saved her, but before anything happened she needed to know why.
"How do you feel?" he asked
"I feel better... thanks to you. You still need to answer my question from last night."
"Well aren't we impatient?" he said with a smile. Utena gave him an irritated look and he became serious again. "If you must know, Utena, it's because I care about you too much to bare seeind you hurt or in any pain."
"Do you really mean that." Utena was rather taken back by this statement. He had just told her he cared about her. Should she tell him she felt the same or would she be to forward in doing that.
"With all my heart." The conviction in his eyes and the firmness in his voice told her he meant what he was saying. He started to walk toward the door.
"Where are you going?" asked Utena.
"I imagine you don't want me around after what I just told you."
"Touga?"
"Yes?"
"I care about you too."
"I already knew you did Iwasn't sure you knew though." said Touga coming back over and sitting down on the bed next to her.
"Huh?"
"Last night you woke up many times but each time you were almost always calling for me. I want to thank you if you hadn't I wouldn't have realized I still do have a reason to live."
"What's the reason?" asked Utena starting to blush.
"To protect you and make sure you always are safe. I know I'll probably never be as great as your prince but..."
"Touga as far as I'm concerned you are my prince." She saw the happiness fill his eyes. Touga leaned toward her, hesitated a moment and then kissed her. Utena had never had a kiss like this. It felt like she had slipped into a totally different world and the only people who existed were Touga and herself. Finally he drew back and his eyes told her that he had felt the same way. Utena shivered a little and realized she felt a little cold. Touga took her hand in his.
"Your cold aren't you?" said Touga.
"Just a little." Utena said. Touga got up and lay down next to her. As he did this he wrapped his arms around her and snuggled up against him feeling the warmth of his body. They kissed once more and then slowly drifted off to sleep in each other's arms. Utena knew as sleep overcame her that she had never felt safer and never would unless she was with Touga.
Well that was a load of sentimental mush huh? I know a lot of people don't like Touga but I can't help but think there might be more to him. Hopefully I portrayed him in a way that you could forget how manipulative he was in the episodes. Anyway that was my first Utena story and I'm thinking of doing more if you guys liked this. So if you could pleeez R/R. Thanx!