A/N: Hey all! This is just a story that I've had in my mind for awhile and I finally decided to write it. It was supposed to be a short little one-shot at first but when I was writing it, it ended up a lot longer hehe. Anyways, I know this pairing will creep out some, but I just thought they had a lot of chemistry, so I wanted to try it out. Constructive criticism is welcome. I hope you like it!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I never will. Also, there's a line from the song Outrage by Capital Lights in here, which I also do not own. I wonder if any of you can identify it. : P

Warning: Mentions of yaoi and there's a sexual scene, but it's not sex, so I guess you could call it a heavily sensual scene. It's nothing that needs to be M rated

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It's no surprise I won't be here tomorrow

I can't believe that I stayed 'til today

Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow

But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise

~No Surprise; Daughtry

Old Habits Die Hard

Strange. Vulgar. Pedophile. Greedy. All these terms could describe the great white-haired Sannin nowadays. Not that anyone knew of his sick new obsession, but if someone were to find out they would be sure to shoot those scathing words in his direction.

But Jiraiya didn't care.

He knew that what he was doing was repulsive, was frowned upon. But Sasuke was just too intoxicating, too tempting. Jiraiya found that he couldn't wait until Saturday hit, when they could finally spend time together. And until that time came Jiraiya found that he could content himself by simply watching. He was sure that Sasuke knew of his frequent stalking but the boy didn't seem to mind. Or at least he never said anything.

And now it was Saturday evening again.

Adrenaline pumped through him as he slipped on his sandals and locked the door. His steps were sure and quick as he made his way through Konoha. He was hurrying but was also trying to make it invisible to any curious onlookers. It would be no good if someone were to follow him to his destination. After all, he'd already been caught once, and one time was certainly enough for him.

"So Kakashi, what should we toast to today?" Jiraiya questioned, pouring both of them a shot of sake.

"Hmm," Kakashi hummed thoughtfully, picking up his cup. "Let's toast to long lives and an honest living"

Jiraiya snorted. "Come on Kakashi, I know you better than that."

Kakashi's eye curved upward. "That you do. Well, here's also to good steamy adult novels!"

The Sannin chuckled heartily. "Cheers!"

Both men downed their drinks. Jiraiya set down his cup and leaned back with his hands behind his head, sighing in contentment. "Life is good, Kakashi."

"Mmh," the silver haired man answered in a distracted fashion.

Surprised by this, Jiraiya cracked open one eye to see his friend staring at the table, looking uncomfortable.

"What's wrong, Kakashi?"

The Jounin met his eyes and suddenly became serious. "Jiraiya, I need to talk to you about Sasuke."

The Sannin's heart skipped a beat but his face was well composed, twisting into an annoyed expression. "What about the Uchiha? He's not trying to run away for more power again is he?"

"No…but I have been worried about that. Ever since he tried to leave for Orochimaru I've watched him at nights until he falls asleep. I know I shouldn't worry, since he already has to stay in my house unless I give him permission to leave, but…"

"It reassures you," Jiraiya finished.

"Yes," Kakashi answered with a sigh before refocusing back on his original topic. "And by checking on him every night I've discovered that he talks in his sleep."

This came as a surprise to the Sannin and he asked a question without consulting his better judgment. "Really? What does he say?"

"He mostly says your name, actually." Kakashi's accusing eye seemed to pierce through Jiraiya's soul and mind.

"My name?" Jiraiya feigned confusion. "Why would he say my name?"

"I've been trying to figure that out myself. I thought that maybe you could help me."

Jiraiya shrugged. "I'm at as much of a loss as you are, but I can wing it." He desperately searched for a plausible, unsuspicious answer in his head. "Maybe it's because I was the one who prevented him from going to Orochimaru and so he holds a grudge against me even in his sleep."

"Hmm, perhaps." Jiraiya could tell that Kakashi didn't buy it. "But his tone wasn't hateful when he said your name. It was more…affectionate."

The Sannin attempted to keep the nervousness out of his chuckle. "Well that's odd. I didn't think that the Uchiha could be affectionate."

"Jiraiya." Beating around the bush was now over. "What are you doing to Sasuke?"

Said man sighed and sat up straight. Kakashi knew something was up so there was no use lying. "We love each other, Kakashi. I know it's wrong and you're probably disgusted with me, but -"

"Yes, I am," Kakashi interrupted with a cold glare. "But not for the reason you think."

Jiraiya blinked. "What do you mean?"

"I know that Sasuke sneaks out every Saturday and now I know where he's going. You should see the look on his face when he returns from meeting you. He's always smiling, Jiraiya, which he rarely does. I can tell he loves you."

"Yes, Kakashi, that's what I'm trying to -"

"I wasn't finished. Even though you two have quite a big difference when it comes to age, and even though you're both male, I could've overlooked it if you truly made each other happy. But you don't love him, Jiraiya. You love Orochimaru. Don't protest; I know your feelings haven't changed. Sasuke is Orochimaru's shadow, his doppelganger, so you're using him because you can't have the real thing. Isn't that right?"

Jiraiya, for once, was silent.

"This has to stop, Jiraiya." Kakashi's tone was pleading. "Sasuke will find out if he doesn't know already, and when he does, it'll kill him. He'll leave again, and no one will be able to stop him this time. Please don't lead him on anymore! It's not healthy for you, Jiraiya, or him. Please stop this."

Jiraiya's solemn eyes stayed glued to the table as Kakashi anxiously awaited an answer. Then he silently poured himself a cup of sake before downing it and pushing himself to his feet.

"Jiraiya!"

The Sannin froze at the exit of the restaurant. Then he answered without turning his head. "Y'know how people have fatal flaws, Kakashi? Well, mine is greed."

Jiraiya didn't see Kakashi's expression but he could bet that it wasn't a pleasant one.

"Of course," Kakashi hissed. "How can you be anything but greedy when it's all that you know?"

The bitterness in his voice was Jiraiya's queue to leave.

As the memory faded Jiraiya blinked and took in his surroundings with surprise. He was already at the Uchiha compound. That was quick.

His heart picked up its pace and he marched through the dark streets until he reached Sasuke's old residence. No lights were on. That was unusual. He entered the unlocked door and fumbled for the light switch in the dark. He flicked it on and cringed as the brightness stung his eyes.

When his eyes adjusted Jiraiya swiftly scanned the room for Sasuke but saw no one. Irritation seeped in quickly. He ground his teeth and trekked through the house, not amused with the Uchiha's game of hide and seek. As he searched and came up with naught, a new sense of fear and dread filled him. His movements became quicker and his eyes rolled in their sockets in a crazed manner as he turned the house inside out, desperate.

Suddenly he froze, realization dawning on him. What if Kakashi didn't let him leave? Was Sasuke even coming tonight?

Panic flowed through his veins, following his lifeblood to his heart where it was pumped and dispersed from his head to his toes. Soon he was hyperventilating and took a seat on the navy blue couch to try and calm himself. He needn't jump to conclusions too soon. Sasuke was simply late, that was all. Any minute he would –

Click.

Jiraiya's heart stopped and half a second later he was yanking Sasuke through the half-opened door and kissing him fiercely. He kicked the door shut absently as he crushed the teen against the wall with his body, desperate to feel his every curve and outline. His lips never paused in their anxious molding against soft pink skin and his tongue excavated Sasuke's mouth more fiercely than ever before. His hands slid over revealed and clothed porcelain skin alike, as if making sure it was still the same.

Once Sasuke overcame his shock his lips responded and his arms wrapped around his lover's neck, pulling Jiraiya closer. When the Sannin felt the Uchiha respond he threaded his hand through longish raven locks (it had only taken a simple suggestion on his part to convince Sasuke to grow his hair out) and pulled back. Sasuke tilted his head back obediently and released a sigh when he felt warm lips placing random kisses on his neck.

"Jiraiya," he breathed. "I love you."

In answer the white haired man placed a hot kiss on Sasuke's lips. "Say it again and again!"

Sasuke complied. "God I love you so much Jiraiya. I love you!"

Jiraiya continued to love the teen's neck and also started to suck and bite. "I love you, Orochimaru." Panting. "So you've told me multiple times, Jiraiya." Chuckling. The Sannin's teeth clenched. His fist tightened in raven hair. "Again."

This time when Sasuke spoke Jiraiya pretended. He pretended that the long pale neck was pasty white and that the voluminous, shoulder-length strands were limp and jet black, and that his hand could run through them for many seconds before reaching empty air again.

"I love you more than anyone else in this world."

The whisper was just loud enough to reach Jiraiya's ears. His mouth opened and his eyes closed in pure ecstasy as his fantasy became reality to him. Afraid to lose this moment of pure joy, he picked Sasuke up bridal style and carried him to the teen's bed where he lay him down gently. He then straddled Sasuke and removed his shirt, allowing his hands and mouth to reenact a scene from long ago, only the way he planned it.

"Orochimaru, don't leave, please! You can't go. I love you!" Laughing. "Foolish Jiraiya." A cold hand caressing his face. "Did you actually think I was looking for love in you? No, I just wanted a bed partner every once in awhile and you failed even at that. You're too gentle, Jiraiya."

Jiraiya gritted his teeth and banished the memory. This wasn't about the past. He didn't want it to be at least. He needed to focus on what was at hand. He closed his eyes for a moment and then reopened them, observing Orochimaru's face through cloudy eyes. He smiled and leaned down to kiss the snake-like man softly, undoing his pants at the same time. "Don't worry love, I won't hurt you. I'm not rough. I'll be gentle, I promise. I love you." As he started to pull down the jeans Orochimaru made a small noise of protest. He sat back with a worried expression and allowed Orochimaru to get into an upright position.

"Jiraiya, stop."

The white haired Sannin rubbed a pale hand soothingly. "If you're not ready, that's ok. We can try another time."

"That's not it." Sasuke straddled Jiraiya and sealed his lips over the older man's in a passionate kiss. He broke away and observed his expression. "When I kiss you, whose face appears in your mind?"

Jiraiya gazed at him lovingly. "Yours."

"I see." Sasuke then planted small kisses on his neck while caressing the soft skin on Jiraiya's stomach and chest. "And when I touch your skin whose name do you utter?"

The Sannin was nearly breathless. "Yours."

Sasuke brushed his lips against Jiraiya's ear. "And what is my name?"

Jiraiya's breath hitched. He was all over him. His long silky hair was caressing his cheek and his cold white skin was brushing against his. His long bony fingers were stroking his neck and his smell was everywhere! The Sannin moaned out his reply. "Orochimaru!"

Then the double flood came.

The weak floodgates Jiraiya helped Sasuke build collapsed and all of the Uchiha's contained bitterness dropped like a heavy boulder in the pit of his stomach. After that came the pain, but its target was his heart.

When Orochimaru ripped himself away and roughly pulled his shirt on, the second flood struck. It took one second for reality to hit and a longer time for Jiraiya's heart to fill with disappointment. His hallucination swirled down the drain and he had a front row seat as he watched the love twist away into the dark depths of Sasuke's eyes. Bitter realization took its place.

"If it were up to you, I wouldn't be the one receiving your kisses tonight."

It wasn't a question, but a statement.

Jiraiya directed his eyes to the ground. "Yes."

Sasuke ran a hand through his hair and ground his teeth together, ignoring the sharp stab of pain the single word brought on. "I'm not even going to ask what went wrong with your relationship because it doesn't involve me anymore. I won't be your fucking heroin. You can deal with the withdrawals on your own."

Jiraiya knew it was all over, but as Sasuke put his hand on the knob he was overcome with such a depth of unreasonable fear that he couldn't stop himself from scrambling off the bed to grasp the teen's wrist tightly.

"Don't go!"

Sasuke answered without turning around. "Let go of me."

"No!" Jiraiya suddenly tugged Sasuke away from the door and into his arms. "You can't go. I need you! You're all I have left of him. Please!"

Sasuke flinched at the painful, honest words. It took all of his self-control not to burst out into sobs…so he settled on silent tears. He pulled out of Jiraiya's arms weakly and stood glaring, eyes unforgiving.

"You want to know something? I've known for a long time that you were never really there when we spent time together. It was easy to see that you were experiencing a very different scene than I was. But you know what else? I stayed regardless, because I love you, and I still love you, even though you don't feel the same way. At first I thought you were pretending to love me so you could keep me in Konoha to make Naruto happy. I know you love him as a son. I could deal with that, because you didn't do the one thing that every other damn person in the world did; you didn't compare me to Itachi. And that made me happy. I finally felt completely unique." Sasuke swallowed loudly and roughly scrubbed at his wet cheeks in disgust. "But now I see that I'm not. Now I'm just too similar to Orochi-fucking-maru!"

Sasuke snarled and curled his hand into a tight fist. Jiraiya closed his eyes obligingly, knowing that he deserved this, at least. He felt the rush of air past his cheek and heard the thud of a first connecting with the wall. When he opened his eyes Sasuke's porcelain face was an inch away from his and his obsidian eyes were solemn but devoid of anger.

"I was ready, you know." His soft whisper ghosted across Jiraiya's lips. "I was ready, not to be screwed, like Orochimaru, but to make love to you. I would've given it to you." Sasuke gently cradled the Sannin's face with his hands, one with bleeding knuckles, and as he did Jiraiya gazed intently into narrow golden eyes. "But I can't be your dress-up doll, Jiraiya. I can't be a face that you can tweak and overlap to fit your desires. I won't, because I know that you'll never see anyone but him. You look at me, but you don't see me." The teen scanned Jiraiya's eyes and smiled a sad, bitter smile. "You don't even see me now." He leaned in and pressed his lips to his lover's one last time, kissing him powerfully yet gently, conveying all his unreturned feelings in that single gesture.

When Sasuke pulled away Jiraiya's half lidded eyes revealed fear. "Orochimaru, I love you. Please don't leave me!"

Sasuke's heart twisted painfully and he turned to the door. "Goodbye, Jiraiya." The door slammed shut.

And so the pretender lost his mirage.

xXx

The rain was heavy, but not as heavy as the thudding footsteps that were too close behind him. Sasuke pushed his legs to go faster, ignoring the burning in his thighs. He couldn't believe this. Shouldn't that fool Jiraiya be helping Naruto, who was dying? He thought the Sannin would put his beloved pupil's life first.

And damn it, he was so close!

It took too much time to defeat Naruto and now Sasuke was weak and behind schedule. He knew he couldn't take on the Sannin, or outrun him. He cursed under his breath as his foot sank into a deep puddle – his attention had lapsed for only a moment – and became encased in thick mud. He kicked his foot fiercely and broke free, but a moment was all Jiraiya needed to catch up.

"Sasuke, stop running. You can't escape now."

The Uchiha gritted his teeth and turned slowly to glare into equally black eyes. "I can't run away, but I can still fight you."

"If you had your Sharingan on I would believe you, but the lack of it indicates that you don't even have enough chakra for it."

Sasuke winced as Jiraiya called his bluff. He was right. But he wouldn't just let himself be dragged back, not after all he worked for! "So I guess Naruto isn't worth being saved huh?"

He knew he was hitting below the belt and he expected it to hit home but Jiraiya's expression didn't change. His eyes merely glinted with an unreadable emotion. Sasuke attempted to hide his frustration.

"He's not worth losing you."

"…What?" Sasuke's face was twisted in unmasked shock. "I thought you of all people would value his life over returning a fugitive!"

Jiraiya observed the Uchiha with that strange look, causing a chill to run down his spine. "I would rather see Naruto die a hundred times over than let you leave me now."

Sasuke stumbled a few steps back as if he were slapped, eyes wide. "Wh-what the hell is wrong with you?! Are you sick or something? You hate me! You'd love to see me leave!"

"Sick? Yes, I am sick for loving a child. But I can't stay away from you." Jiraiya took a step closer.

"Don't come any closer!" Sasuke growled, refusing to step back and show fear.

"Hate was just my cover-up. If you had known how I really felt you would've been disgusted."

"I am disgusted!" Sasuke hissed as the older man moved closer.

"But with who, Sasuke?" The Sannin breathed. He was only a foot away now. "Me? Or yourself?"

"What the hell are you talking about? You, of course!"

"Really? I don't think so. I'll put it bluntly. You've always been fascinated with me Sasuke. I've noticed you staring at me, when you think I'm not looking. I've always wondered why you're so interested in me." He paused and placed his hand on Sasuke's chest, causing the boy's breath to hitch. "Your heart is beating a mile a minute. Is it at our close proximity?"

Sasuke opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again. "Get your hand off me," he whispered fiercely.

"Why don't you remove it?" When Sasuke did nothing Jiraiya smiled and the strange glint returned to his eyes. "It's because you want it there."

The Uchiha said nothing when Jiraiya leaned toward him but gasped when their lips connected. He refused to react at first but then gave in and tentatively responded. He pulled his body closer to Jiraiya's warm frame, favoring it rather than the cold rain. When they pulled apart Jiraiya hugged him close and buried his face in the teen's damp raven hair. He inhaled deeply and mumbled something Sasuke couldn't discern.

"What?" he asked curiously.

"Nothing, it's nothing," the older man mumbled. He pulled away, still holding Sasuke by his shoulders. "So Sasuke, you have a choice to make. Which do you want more; power, or me?"

Sasuke bit his lip. He'd been waiting for both for such a long time…he didn't know what to choose. Then he stared up into Jiraiya's eyes and saw that strange glint again.

And suddenly he knew what it was.

"I choose love," Sasuke whispered softly.

The glint flooded Jiraiya's eyes completely and he lifted Sasuke into his arms, whispering, "Then it's love you'll get." He started back toward Konoha and Sasuke soon fell asleep to the gentle sloshing of his footsteps.

The last thing he remembered was that Jiraiya's arms were much too tight around him.

Sasuke didn't know it at the time, but that glint in Jiraiya's eyes was obsession.

The memory faded and his fists clenched. Obsidian eyes opened to meet the interested golden gaze of a snake. Orochimaru was perched on the edge of his pupil's bed, observing him with twisted fascination. So many emotions crossed Sasuke's face as the boy revisited his worst memory, some which made Orochimaru disgusted and others which pleased him. But the look on the teen's face at the moment suited the Sannin just fine. Sasuke's eyes were overflowing with bitter anguish.

Orochimaru loved it.

"I don't get it," Sasuke growled angrily, sitting up to glare into the older man's eyes. "What about you has him so hooked? What does he lo-love about you?"

Orochimaru didn't miss the stumble on that particular word. So Sasuke was still in pain over that subject. His smirk widened. Good.

"If you really must know, Sasuke-kun, the answer is everything. He loves my cunning and my cruelty, my good and bad traits alike. He is foolish for doing so, but he can't help himself. I'm simply irresistible to him." He paused to let his words stab into Sasuke's heart. His beautiful face betrayed the intense pain he felt .Orochimaru's long tongue flicked over his lips in anticipation.

"Would you like to know what else he loves?" He bent over Sasuke, forcing the boy to lie on his back to retreat father away. "He loves it when my hair sweeps over his skin, and when my lips caress his collarbone." Orochimaru moved his mouth to the pale teen's neck and placed kisses on it until he reached his collarbone. Then he sucked and nibbled on it, noting how Sasuke's body stiffened and his eyes went wide. "And he can't possibly help himself when my fingers brush over his skin ever so lightly…"

When the cold fingertips trailed down his arms and traveled under his shirt, Sasuke found himself imagining another scene overlapping the one he was living. And suddenly he was staring into black eyes like his own and a warm smile was revealed to him. His heart skipped a beat and he tentatively reached a hand up to caress a tan cheek.

Orochimaru paused as Sasuke's eyes lost focus and became cloudy. Then when the teen's hand touched his cheek he smirked. He wasn't surprised when the same hand fisted in his hair and Sasuke lurched forward to clumsily smash their lips together.

The snake responded and let Sasuke have his way for awhile. When they broke apart he dipped his head into the crook of Sasuke's neck and swept his tongue across the familiar mark in a single stroke. He felt the younger shinobi shiver beneath him. A second later his fangs were piercing the soft marred flesh and Sasuke was screaming and pushing him away.

The Sannin chuckled, watching the Uchiha clutch his bleeding shoulder as the cloudiness was flushed from his wide eyes. He glanced around frantically until his gaze fell on Orochimaru. His confusion was evident.

"I'm assuming that this is the first time you've used this replacement act, Sasuke-kun." Pain flooded Sasuke's eyes and Orochimaru knew he didn't need to elaborate. "Well I certainly never thought you to be the hypocritical type. But then again, you are just like me." Sasuke didn't respond so Orochimaru stroked his raven hair, threading his fingers though the long locks. He leaned close, grinning as he whispered into the teen's ear. "I forgot to mention how much I like your hair. It looks just like mine, actually. How strange."

When Orochimaru left, his smirk left with him.

And when Kabuto came to retrieve Sasuke the next day, unevenly cut dark locks were scattered on the floor.

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A/N: Oh hey, kudos to anyone who can guess what Jiraiya said to Sasuke in the last flashback, when they were hugging and Sasuke couldn't understand what he mumbled. You'll also get tackle glomped by me. :D So it's totally worth it to try and guess. Anyways, I appreciate any feedback. Thanks for reading!