Karkat hears a knock at his door and grumbles something along the lines of "I'm coming," though it was impossible to tell exactly what he was saying. Fuck, he never cleaned his shitty apartment after his buddies came over last night, what if it was a beautiful girl at the door? He took it back as soon as he thought about it. There was no way it was even a normal looking girl, Karkat wasn't classy enough for that, girls just looked past him, and instead fell for his computer savvy best friend. Kakat tripped over a loose pizza box, and cursed as he fell hard on his filthy carpet, hitting his hand on a nearby wall in the process. "Fuck that box!" he shouted. Karkat was there on the white carpet for longer than anybody in their right mind ever wanted to be on that floor. Karkat finally got the will to stand up and answer the stupid door. Whoever is there better be fucking happy he got up for them. He undid the bolt lock which he kept locked tight at all hours of the day, because he lived in a shitty part of town. Karkat slowly opened the door to see his cousin Terezi standing there. This was actually a surprise, they usually met at her house, or at mom's. She looked serious, dressed in her business clothes, with her brief case, and her observant eye scanning Karkat and his shitty apartment. Okay so he had been correct, it was a girl, but not one he would be particularly happy about being there.

"What the fuck are you doing here so early in the morning!" Karkat said, rubbing his sore eye with his palm. God damn, it was bright outside.

Terezi scoffed, "Karkat, it's 3 in the afternoon."

Karkat rolled his eyes. Snarky as ever. "Are you waiting for a fucking invitation to come inside or something?"
Karkat had managed to get the couch cleaned off, where the two could sit on it, comfortably enough. Terezi looked around and rolled her eyes at the filth.

"Karkat, you are 26 years old, when are you going to grow up, and get a steady job?" Karkat bit his cheek

"My job as a grocery bagger is steady. Look at my awesome place." Terezi laughed lightly at his stupid joke. The two were close, but lately she had been drifting away, it was nice to see her laugh at his shitty jokes.

"Okay, i guess it's time to tell you why i came here on such short notice, huh." Karkat nodded reaching over and taking a slice of pizza from a random box. Pineapple, gross. Eridan picked it out, why had Karkat actually bought it?

"Please don't eat that." Terezi said flatly. Karkat threw the piece back into the box and held up his hands, as to surrender. Terezi started again, shaking her head.

"So, my friend, Jane, passed on." Terezi said biting her lip. Karkat's eyes grew wide,

"Terezi I'm so sorry, sure I'll go to the funeral wit-" Terezi held up her hand to stop him.

"Karkat, what I am about to ask you to do is way more than going to a funeral." Karkat blinked. Terezi never asked for much, whatever she was going to ask for, he was sure he could provide it for her. Terezi took a deep breath, whatever she was about to ask him, had to be something huge.

"Karkat, i need you to take her two kids, while we investigate the case. Jane was murdered." Karkat choked on his own saliva. No way he was going to agree to this shit! This had to be some sort of joke.

"You want me to what!?" Karkat said grabbing her shoulders. Terezi sighed and looked down. Fuck she was serious.

"They're really great kids, Karkat, I can't let them go to just anyone." Terezi's voice cracked near the end of the sentence.

"Terezi, i can barely even take care of myself!" Karkat said furrowing his brow. She looked so upset, but there had to be another way around this!

"Sollux could take them in!" Karkat said exasperated

"Karkat, Aradia is pregnant, they don't need that kind of stress right now, and i don't trust anybody else enough to do this. Eridan would force his fashion and racism on them, Tavros is stuck in a wheelchair, god bless him, Equius is with Nepeta in France, and Gamzee…. well he's Gamzee! Kanaya can come help, but she works a lot, so there's that, I'll help even, My company will give you 1000 dollars a week to feed and clothe the , if you would just please…. just, meet them. They'll love you." Terezi said desperately.

Karkat sighed in defeat. "Fine."

Terezi smiled at him. "Great, I'll bring them by in a week!" Karkat smiled weakly and nodded. He had to make this apartment child friendly in the matter of a week? He had a lot of work ahead of him.

"God dammit!" Karkat paced the floor. How was he supposed to take care of two children? Karkat hadn't met them, but they seemed alright, they were twins, and they were 8 years old. Jade and John were stupid names, John wasn't even fucking short for anything! His name was literally fucking John. And Jade wasn't even green. Who came up with these names! AT least they were kind of cute, from what he had seen. He couldn't imagine his life changing so drastically, yet two kids would be here on his doorstep in 5 minutes. Karkat had hired a maid to clean up the place, it looked better, but the kids would have to sleep in his room. Why did Terezi have to be such a good lawyer!? How did she manage to get him to take this gig? What would they even call him? He examined his refrigerator full of juice boxes. Karkat heard a knock at his door, he went to go answer it nervously. He opened it slowly.

"It'th twinth!" He heard a familiar lisp say. Karkat swung open the door "Sollux!" he said relieved. The relief didn't last long, when Karkat looked down, he saw two dark-haired children clinging to his friend's pants. Sollux smiled and invited himself in.

"Meet your new daddy kidth!" Jade was the first to unlatch from Sollux. She poked Karkat's leg.

"He seems stupid,"Jade said, returning to Sollux. Karkat growled

"Hey kid why don't you go fucking live with Captor here, then!" John Looked up at Sollux,

"Please Sollux, can we please live with you?"Sollux shook his head.

"Thorry kiddo, I think Aradia would have a few thingth to thay about that." Jade sighed, and left Sollux's side again.

"Fine. If we have to stay here, i might as well be comfortable." Jade said plopping on the couch.

"Do you have cable Mister Karkat, sir?" John asked quietly from Sollux's side. Karkat shook his head. Dammit kids like TV douchecanoe, why didn't you think of that! Wait, he still had Netflix, that had to have something other than romcoms on it, didn't it? Sollux shifted uncomfortably.

"Well I'm going to leave these two here, call me or Terezi if anything goeth wrong." Karkat nodded reluctantly, as his friend walked out the door. John wandered to where Karkat was and grabbed the hem of his shirt.

"So you're my new daddy?, I've never had a real daddy before." John said looking up at Karkat.

"I'm not your dad kid." Karkat said shaking his head.

John shrugged "Can I call you daddy though? So the kids at school will stop making fun of me and Jade for not having a Daddy?" Karkat felt a pang of guilt through his chest. These poor children had no mother and father, and now it was up to him to take care of them.

"Of course you can call me Daddy, John." What had he gotten himself into?