All character are not mine they belong to the TPTB.

Nightmare

"I love you Sam, no one can ever take you away from me. We're destined to be together forever."

I stare at him and turn away. Just the thought of him being near me is making me sick I want to get away but I can't. I'm stuck here. I can't leave. He wont let me.

I try to make myself comfortable. But it's no use. He comes close to me and I can smell Him. His scent mixed with blood and sweat. It's making me gag. I try to move back but he doesn't let me, yanking me closer to him and I go still.
He starts caressing my cheek and I try to stop myself from flinching. There is blood is on his hands. I turn my face to get him to stop but its no use. I know what he wants.

I don't fight when he kisses me. He deepens it and I try to control myself from gagging. He wants me to respond to his touch. I can't it goes against everything I am. Everything I feel.

I resign myself to this. What's the use in fighting. My life is over. There's no reason to live anymore

Why didn't I notice his behavior before? Was I so desperate for a normal life that I turned a blind eye to all his faults, his little quirks?

So blind that I let these things fall through the cracks? Why didn't I see the warning? The signs that were there in front of me. Listened to all my friends? He could be the most charming man one day and a raving jealous crazed maniac the next.

He was not well and yet here I was with him. Not by choice but here never the less.

My track record for attracting the lunatic fringe was perfect 2 for 2.

It started when he moved in with me. He had been accepted to the Colorado Springs Police Department and said we needed to save money for the wedding.

I agreed and made adjustments for him. Most of his things went in the spare rooms and I made extra space in my closet only because he insisted. He wanted us to share everything from this to toothpaste. I didn't want to start another fight so I agreed. I shouldn't have made that kind of decisions so fast. Not without thinking, just reacting to an animal instinct to have a man in my life to make my life complete. That was so against who I am, so against my privacy, yet I agreed.

I went along with my usual routine getting up early to go to work, running my errands going to the gym. I explained to him that I was set in my routines and I wasn't going to change. That he would have to adjust.

He was too agreeable to this arrangement saying he understood, that me living alone all this time had made me independent and he didn't want to change me. He started his new position and things went well for a while.

But I started to notice little things changing in my house. When I went off world and returned after a couple of days things had been moved around. Pictures of my family and friends had been replaced with ones of us or of him. My books started to disappear also replaced with his stuff and my clothes started to disappear being replaced with turtlenecks, long pants and over sized shirts.

My place started to look like a pig sty and when I protested he said he was sorry and would get to it right after the game. Or he would say that if I had a chance would I mind picking up after him since we were a team and me doing this for him would make up for me not being around as much as he wanted me to be.

He started to go with me to the gym. Insisting I wear sweats and long t-shirts saying he didn't want to give the rest of the people in the gym a look of what he was only entitled to.

I had no choice since all my work-out gear had suddenly vanished after my last mission. I couldn't even go to the drug store without him tagging along to make sure I wasn't picking up birth control pills since he insisted that I got pregnant before we got married.

I was regretting having said yes to him. I was having second thoughts. He would sense this and back off and become the wonderful guy I had dated and he would make everything okay again between us. But I couldn't help it. I wanted things back to the way things were. To what my life was before meeting him. A lonely life but a good life, without obligations, without orders from a man I thought I knew. I was getting more and more freaked at how he was slowly taking command of my life, reorganizing it without my consent, only because it had to be changed to his views and to his will.

Things came to head when I had been injured after a bad mission and the guys gave me a ride home. Daniel and Teal'c and the General had taken me home wanting to make sure I was okay. I came home to a house full of his friends and girlfriends and him sitting a little to close to one of the ladies. I called to him to get his attention and he smiled and said to join him and patted his lap.

I shook my head no but he kept insisting. The girl next to him notice I wasn't complying and took it upon herself to sit on his lap. He laughed and said no that he was taken but to give him time.

He was drunk and slurred his words. He said he was so happy I was home and would I mind whipping up some goodies for our guests.

I was in pain and in crutches and this idiot wanted me to be Betty Crocker and entertain his guests.

The guys were angry. Daniel turned off the obnoxious music and Teal'c came out of my room with a pile of coats.

I stood in the middle of my house and let out a long high piercing whistle, saying the party was over. If anyone needed a cab I would be more then happy to call one for them.

I had to take control of the situation but alcohol and a group of unruly drunks did not make for a good combination. I heard a lot of people mumble and goading Pete telling him who wore the pants in our relation and others telling me to chill out. But I didn't care. He came up to me and asked what the hell I was doing. These were his friends and the night was still young. I wasn't supposed to be here anyways. I was supposed to be out saving the universe.

I told him to shut up and looked around to see if anyone had heard what he had just said. I knew I would regret the day they gave him clearance and he just went ahead and gave me more reason to dump him. I caught the eye of the General and I mouthed sorry but he didn't move and just stood his ground and watch Pete get up and come towards me.

He said he wanted to talk to me outside and started to drag me to the backyard.

Teal'c dropped the coats when the music started again, I looked over to see two very big and intimidating men stare down Daniel and Daniel trying to talk his way out of a bad situation. I motioned to Teal'c to Daniel and he bowed his head and went to help. I looked for the General and couldn't find him.

While this was going on Pete kept pulling me through the crowd. I tripped and lost my crutches. I was going to fall and injury myself again. I yanked out of his grip and tried to hold on to anything when strong arms came from behind me and held me up.

I turned. It was Him, as usual, always there to save me. I could see the anger brewing in his eyes. He looked down at me and asked if I was okay. I nodded and just leaned into him wishing we were away from this place, somewhere alone, and where the choices I had made never existed.

I was pulled back into real life when I heard my name yelled over the music. I turned to see my fiancé asking what the hell was I doing and why had I not obeyed him and followed him outside. I felt Jack's hands squeeze my arm, he was getting fed up and I knew that wasn't a good sign.

Pete saw the General behind me and pointed at him saying what the hell was he doing here? He wasn't welcomed in his house.

I felt Jack tense more, his hand on my hip was nearly hurting me.

I told Pete to stop acting like a lunatic. This was my house and if he would sober up for a second he would have noticed that I was in crutches and couldn't move as quickly as he wanted me to.

Pete looked at my leg in a cast and looked up at us and started to yell at Jack. Saying this was his fault that if he had his way I wouldn't be going through the gate that I would be home waiting for him.

I was in shock. What did he mean if he had his way? Where did that come from? Is that what he wanted me for!! A woman who didn't disobey who followed without question? A woman who would do the chores, look after the babies, (babies?) and above all turn a blind eye to what he did to have fun, getting drunk or fucking the secretaries, because he was the Man?? And a woman should obey with out question.

But the stupid schmuck made a reference to the Gate. I didn't have to turn to feel the anger Jack felt. Everyone stopped and was staring at our standoff.

Teal'c came next to Jack and handed me my crutches. Daniel stood next to me and waited to see what Pete would do.

Pete's friends came up and stood by him and started to ask who were the guys and why was Jack still holding me around the waist.

I had so hope that had slipped Pete's mind but thanks to these knuckle heads things were going to get nasty.

Daniel knew were this was heading and whispered to me if he should call the police. Jack snorted. Pete looked at him and said it wouldn't be necessary since half the force was here now.

I had to defuse this now. I started to walk towards Pete but Jack wouldn't let go. I turned to him and said it was alright that I would be okay. I was going to go talk to him outside.

He looked at me and then to Pete and before he let me go he whispered that he would be right here just in case.

I walked up to Pete and motioned him to follow me outside. I told him to please have his friends leave. He waited and then motioned to one of his friends who went to tell everyone the party was over.

As soon as the door closed behind us he started to yell.

How could I embarrass him in front of his friends and colleagues? That he was finally fitting in and I had to show up with the three stooges and ruin everything.

He yelled why couldn't I be a normal fiancé who stays on earth instead of chasing aliens on different planets? Why couldn't I obey him and follow his rules? Why couldn't I give it all up for him? Didn't I love him enough to see that he was the best thing that had happened in my pathetic life!

This was not the man I wanted to marry. Hell I thought I don't even want to be in the same room with him. I couldn't believe my ears. He was the most egomaniacal, control, manipulative freak I'd ever seen. He'd waited to find the perfect candidate to let his deeper self show and I was the lucky winner of such a prize of a guy. I should have noticed he was paranoiac, when he'd stalked me. I should have taken heed to the warnings. His need for control, for power could be dangerous, for me. Seemingly if I wasn't with him, I was against him, that was so textbook, and that was scaring me. I was the one who made him suffer by not obeying his will. This is what was hiding beneath the surface of the nice Pete. The Pete that agreed with me and let me saw what I want and told me what I wanted to hear. I could have slapped myself at how big a fool I had been. But now it would stop now I would remedy the situation. He was history and it would be a cold day in hell before I'd marry this lunatic.

I said I'd had enough and started to go back inside. I said it was over, that if I had a choice of being locked away in a far off prison or be married to him I'd take the prison anytime. I then threw out about the line of him being the best thing to happen in my pathetic life was so off base that it was laughable to even say it out loud again. The best thing that ever happened to me was inside those doors and he just couldn't cope that he would never measure up to that.

He let out a roar and I never saw him come up behind me. He tried to stop me from walking away only to knocked me down and sent me through the glass door. The last thing I remember before losing consciousness was the sound of shattered glass and my name being yelled out by the three men in my life.

I awoke in a hospital bed. Daniel with a black eye and swollen lip was sitting next to me.

I looked around and saw Teal'c with a stitched gash on his head and a nasty bruise on his cheek. I tried to talk but it was hard.

He was missing and dread filled me. Daniel saw my shock and blurted out that he was alright but was tied up at the moment.

I was filled in on what had happened. Both Pete and the General were arrested but were let go until a further investigation into the incident could be done.

The police and the MP's wanted to talk to me. To find out what had happen and if I was going to press charges.

A nurse came in with a huge arrangement of roses. I felt my stomach knot. She placed them on the side table and handed me a card. She said there were two more outside and now that I was awake she would bring them in.

I read the card and closed my eyes. They were from Pete apologizing for everything and to please forgive him. I asked the guys if they had ordered me flowers; they nodded no. I asked the nurse if the other two were from the same place and she nodded. I told her to take them away or better, send them back. I didn't want them.

I handed the card to Daniel and he muttered that the guy had no nerve. Teal'c got up and helped the nurse remove the flowers.

I thanked Daniel for being here and apologized to him for his injuries. Teal'c came back in and I did the same thing. They said I had nothing to apologize for and they would not let anyone or anything harm me.

There was a knock on the door and I tensed up. We turned to see Jack walk in and I gasped. He had two black eyes and a cut lip. His arm was in a sling and bruising was all over his neck and face.

He smiled and I could see him wince. He came next to me and handed me a box. Inside the box were a dozen chocolate chip cookies from Mom's bakery. I smiled and asked him how he was. I touched his lip and caressed his cheek.

My choices had caused this pain on my family.

My perception of what a normal love life had caused these cuts and bruises.

The guys left us alone and he filled me in on what had been happening. I wasn't listening just looking at him and what my bad judgment had caused.

I told him I was sorry for causing him any pain and asked when I could speak to the Police and M.P's to clear his and the guys name in this incident.

He said soon.

He got up and sat on the bed he took me into his arms and asked how long Pete had been abusive with me. I said never. That this was the first time. But he had been acting strange ever since he moved in.

We heard noises out in the hall way and I recognized the voice. I tensed up and heard Jack cursed. He told me to stay put that he would take care of it.

It was Pete. He was making a scene outside saying he wanted to see me and that the nurses and doctors were conspiring to keep us apart. Security was called. When Pete saw Jack walk out of my room he started to blame him for everything.

I wanted to tell him it was him not Jack that had made me leave. That it was all his fault not Jack's, the nurses or doctors.

Security escorted Pete out but not without threatening everyone, saying he would make them all pay for keeping him away from his wife.

Wife.

He didn't understand. He couldn't. He would never comprehend that it was over get that it was over. In his mind we were married. That was what he had fabricated and did not want to let go and that wasn't good for me because in his train of thought his violence was excusable since I was his wife, or his property. Like an animal that had disobey and had to be punished for disobeying. I was feeling sick by this whole situation. I wanted to go home I wanted to leave this all behind me. Jack came back and I told him this. He understood and said he would call the police and the M.P.'s to get my statement.

General Hammond came to see me and said he was being temporarily assigned to the SGC till this was resolved. Jack had been put on suspension for his part in the fight.
I argued with him saying it wasn't his fault that I was attacked and he was only trying to protect me as were the guys. He said he agreed with me but he couldn't do anything. He also said if he had been there he would have wiped the floor with Pete.

Pete had shown his true colors the day I left the hospital. The guys were there to take me home. I was jumpy wondering if Pete would show up when I walked out the door.

The guys were keeping an eye on things and Jack stood beside me and held my hand as I was wheeled to his truck. He helped me in and drove to my house.

We made it home with no incident and I limped my way to my front door. I opened it up and let out a cry.

My home had been torn to pieces. Everything was left the same from the party. There were bottles of alcohol all over the floor and broken furniture. Daniel tried to hold me back but I wouldn't let him. Teal'c walked ahead to make sure I didn't trip on anything and Jack held his tongue. I looked at him and could see him burning with anger.

Daniel started to pick things up and I told him not to. I walked to my kitchen and there was food everywhere. I gagged with the smell of rotting food. The guys didn't listen to me and started to pick things up. I walked down the hall to see if Pete had taken his stuff. I didn't want any part of him in my home. I started towards my bedroom.

I let out a scream and they came running. On my bed was my mother's bridal gown torn to sheds and spray painted in red was the word Whore.

I almost collapsed but was held by Jack. Daniel pulled out his phone and said he was calling the police. Teal'c said next time he saw Pete he would seek revenge for hurting me this way.

I wanted to go into hiding. Pete had wanted to hurt me. He had succeeded. Jack gathered me in his arms and said he would take me away from here. Somewhere safe. Somewhere Pete could not harm me.

He took me to his cabin. He insisted I call him Jack. We talked all the way up to Minnesota. I learned things about him in those hours that I would never have guessed. I told him things I had never even told anyone. He listened. No sarcastic remarks no dead pan humor. It was the Jack I loved and had turned my back on. He could be even more amazing that I could ever think. I had never given him a chance and there he was, being the perfect man with me. I began to hope that Life would let me have this second shot, that time would help heal what had happened and mend the wounds I had inflicted.

Daniel and Teal'c stood behind to clean up the mess saying someone had to stay behind to keep an eye on things. They were the only ones that knew where we were heading.

The cabin was a paradise. It so fitted him from the tattered quilt on the bed to the rustic beams that held up the roof. He made me take the bed insisting he could sleep on the couch. He catered to me hand and foot and I was feeling cherished. I felt warmth in him when I thought his heart had turned cold because of Pete.

He took me fishing and was shocked when we actually caught a fish. I laughed and told him I thought there was no fish in the lake. He said he personally had one put in the lake for me. He was so different here so open so caring. I felt suddenly numb. My heart started to race, my cheeks turning red and my hands sweaty. I was so aware of what it was.

Love for a man that would stand by me and would not ask for nothing in return. A love so deep and heartfelt that no words could explain or no man could stop.

He helped me out of the boat and I almost lost my balance. He grabbed me and pushed us both to the dock with me landing on top of him.

He asked if I was alright. I answered no.

He tensed and asked where was I hurt. I pointed at my heart and my lips.

He looked puzzled. I rolled my eyes, leaned into him and kissed him gently on the lips. He was a little taken aback but didn't take long to deepen the kiss.

He sat us up and said «Oh.»

I was embarrassed. Here I was throwing myself at him after he'd saved me from another ruined relationship and what did I expect him to do. Ravish me on the deck?

I tried to stand and he stopped me. He turned my face and pulled me to him, giving me a kiss that left me breathless.

I knew what I wanted; I'd always wanted him.

I leaned onto his shoulder and I apologized for hurting him with Pete. I was looking for something that was right in front of me all the time but I couldn't do anything about it, I couldn't consider it. I'd always thought it was unattainable out of my reach. Regulations and career always seemed important but things had changed. I had changed.

He rubbed my back and told me he was always here and yes it did hurt when I started to go out with Pete but he only wanted me to be happy and if it was with another man then he would learn to accept it.

I hugged him, telling him I was a fool to think any man could take his place in my heart. As of today I was officially resigning from my military post and would I be interested in hiring a slightly daft scientist with a knack of getting into trouble, saving the earth with one arm tied behind her back and could talk technobabble till the cows came home.

He chuckled and said that he thought he could find a spot and kissed me again.
He asked if this was what I wanted to do. He would understand if I wanted to wait till I was ready to give up the SGC and my career. I nodded no that it was time I wanted a life and a family. I had tried and settle with Pete but I would not make that mistake again.

We spent the rest of the week learning about ourselves and sharing each others thoughts and fears. The first time we made love, I felt the tenderest emotions that I had ever experienced. I cried with the sheer joy of feeling the love this man had for me.

He thought it was because he was so hot and so good that he had brought me to tears.

We came back to real life with more bad news. The Colorado Springs Police were harassing any military personal that worked at the SGC and were targeting Daniel in particular. He had stayed on base not wanting to risk any more confrontations. General Hammond called Major Davis at the Pentagon to see what he could do.

The harassment stopped when charges were brought up on Pete for attacking me, the vandalism done to my house and my mothers dress. The charges against the guys were dropped and Pete had vanished. I questioned Jack to see if he had anything to do with it and he said no.

I was afraid to go back to my house. It was not the same, like I had been violated. I didn't feel safe there and his stuff was there to remind me of the biggest mistake of my life.

Jack insisted I stay with him. I was reluctant but he convinced me. I moved some of my stuff and he made me feel at home. I was use to us sleeping together but us being back to real life, it felt odd.

I put in my papers for retirement and Jack asked if I was sure. I told him to sign them. He did and I kissed him in his office in front of Daniel and Teal'c, and said I was 100% sure. He smiled and told the guys to get lost and took me in his arms and kissed me.

Everything was perfect till I got a call from Mark. He was frantic. Pete had showed up in San Diego and had tried to break into his home while his wife and two kids were there alone. Emily called the police and told them there was a mad man at the door asking for Mark, that he would pay for setting him up with his bitch of a sister and that Mark's family would all pay for keeping him and me apart. Emily yelled that the police were on the way and before they arrived he left with a chilling threat. If Pete couldn't have me then no one could.

Mark asked what had happened. I told him everything. He apologized and said he was coming out there to keep me safe. I told him he didn't have to, that I was being well taken care of by my friends and team. He asked me to call as soon as I found out, when Pete was taken into custody. He told me to not take any chances. I reassured him and told him to keep an eye out for his family. I didn't want to be responsible for any of them being harmed.

I was on pins and needles and Jack was extra cautious also making sure someone was with me at all times and the police had sent extra patrols to his house and mine just in case he decided to show.

It all came to head on Sunday morning when we were out for a run. I was feeling cooped up and Jack promised me a run in the park and brunch. It was turning out to be a great day. Jack let Daniel and Teal'c know where we would be eating at and they said they'd meet us.

We arrived at the restaurant and it was packed. We circled to the back and found a parking. Daniel and Teal'c had just arrived and parked next to us. I gave them each a hug and we started to walk to the door.

"You cheating whore", was what I heard from behind us. I gasped and grasped Jack's hand. We all turned around and there was Pete with a gun pointing at us.

"If I can't have you then no one can."

He turned the gun towards me and I stood frozen and closed my eyes waiting for my fate.

I heard Jack scream no and heard the shot. I was falling and all I could think of was yelling out to Daniel, Teal'c and Jack to run.

I was on the ground but felt no pain. I was dying and it was going to be at the hands of a lunatic, not saving the world.

I opened my eyes and felt a weight on me I looked down to see Jack. I called out to him and tried to push him off but when I did I felt stickiness on my hand and looked down to see red.

Blood.

I heard more shots and then Pete was above me and I waited for the final shot. He pushed Jack off of me and started to pull me towards him. I looked down and there was blood all over my shirt. I turned to see were my wound was but could not find anything.

Pete went to Jack and kicked him hard and said that was for thinking he could replace him in my heart.

I turned to see Jack bleeding from a chest wound.

I let out a scream and tried to crawl to him but was being held back by Pete. I was struggling but he was too strong. He laughed and said he was dead and that I had caused this. It was all my fault if I had just obeyed him none of this would have happened.

I heard Daniel and Teal'c yelling for me and Jack. I looked up to see them behind a car. They were both frantic. Pete started to point the gun towards them and I yelled at them to get down. Pete started to drag me away from the only man that meant anything to me in this world. The man that was dead thanks to my choices.

Pete had taken me to the house he had bought for us. This is where he had been hiding out. There where surveillance pictures of me and Jack everywhere pin up to the walls. He handed me a garment bag and told me to change I threw the bag at him and he slapped me so hard I felt my teeth rattle. He handed me the bag and I unzipped it to see a wedding gown.

He made me change in front of him all the while telling me that he forgave me for what I had done and that he was still willing to marry me.

I started to play along and tried to gain his trust so I could escape. It didn't work. When I thought I had him fooled and I tried to run he shot me in the shoulder.

The shots alerted the police and I was now in a standoff with a raving lunatic in a house littered with pictures of me and Jack and a whole squad of swat and special ops officers waiting to storm the place.

He said all he ever wanted was for me to love him and that I was just a cheating whore so it wouldn't matter if I died or not.

I didn't care. I knew my only hope of happiness was gone. Jack was dead. I had no reason to live.

I had had enough. I stood up and felt rage I started to yell at him. I told him he was a coward, that I never loved him,, that I had settled for him, that he had destroyed any chance of me ever being happy. That if I was to die right now I wouldn't care because I would be joining the only man that ever loved me for me.

Pete was yelling at me to shut up and that he was going to kill me but I didn't care. I was close to him, I had pushed him, I knew I had and I didn't care. I wanted to die and I started this mess and I would end it here with him.

He was confused as to why I was acting this way that he made a fatal mistake. Yelling at me that this was all his fault and if I didn't shut up and take responsibility I would pay.

He stood next to a window and all I heard was shattered glass and Pete falling forward towards me. I tried to hold him up but his weight was too much. I fell with him and wished he had pulled the trigger.

I woke up in a hospital bed in the dark

I wasn't sure what had happened, why I was here. I heard a breath but my mind was still blurry, images of this bad dream still flashing uncertainly in front of my eyes, Jack falling on me, Pete getting shot, trying to kiss me. I took long, deep breaths to chase these thoughts out of my mind. I opened my eyes slightly and saw a tall man standing next to the bed. My Jack, he was here, he had taken care of me. I heard a voice call my name.

"Sam??"

Daniel. It was Daniel's voice.

I opened my eyes and tried to rise from the bed. My eyes darted around the dark room looking for him but Daniel's hand held me down.
His eyes told me what I didn't want to know, I hadn't dreamed it. It was real.

This was my nightmare that had only just begun.