:: Chapter One ::
Downfall of Love
Running from Love

Disclaimer: if you recognize it, it's JK Rowling's, if you don't, it's mine.

"Bye Lily dear, be sure and write us the year."

"Make sure you do, that ruddy owl was expensive."

"Dad! Jamie is NOT ruddy!"

"Ok, ok, sorry. Have a good year honey."

Mr. Evans bent to kiss his youngest daughter on the cheek followed in suit by his wife.

Lily Evans embraced both of her parents and then turned to her older sister.

Compared to Petunia, Lily was a breath of sweet fresh air. While Petunia layered on the make up to improve her looks, Lily just applied a think coat of powder and blush. Petunia's hair was shot and framed her face, giving her a chubby appearance.

Lily's hair was long and pulled back into a tight braid, making her look a few years older than she was.

"Good bye sis, see you next summer."

Petunia turned away from her younger sister and snorted.

"Uh huh."

Lily sighed inwardly and reached for her bags to put on the train.

"Allow me m'lady." A voice whispered in ear and she spun around to face Remus Lupin.
"Remy-chan!" she squealed and glomped onto him.
He laughed and hugged his best friend tightly.
"Hello Mr. And Mrs. Evans, how are you?" he asked when the two had pulled away.

"Just fine Remus dear, and you?"

Mrs. Evans asked as she kissed him cheek.

"I'm good." He said as he shook Mr. Evans' hand.

Remus turned out to live only a few towns away and the previous summer Lily had gotten her muggle driver's license.

England hadn't been the same since.
The Hogwarts Express tooted impatiently to remind everyone that it was bout to leave.

Remus and Lily bade Mr. and Mrs. Evans goodbye, promising to write, and pulled their two school trucks onto the train.
After packing their trunks away, they split up to look the their three other friends: Sirius Black, James Potter, and Peter Pettigrew.

Lily found Sirius and James in a compartment by themselves. They seemed to be arguing about something.
"God damnit James, you've got to tell her." Sirius seethed clutching his fists.
"And what am I supposed to say Sirius? 'Hi, how was your summer? Oh, by the way, I'm in love with you.'"

"Sounds good to me."
James growled and kicked Sirius in the shin.
"Fuck you!"
Lily plopped down beside Sirius in time enough to stop his swing, aimed at James' nose.

"You two got so CUTE over the summer!" she swooned playfully.

"You're not too bad yourself." Sirius laughed, catching her as she 'fainted' in his lap.

The compartment door flew open and Remus bused in, looked relieved.

"There you are!" he exclaimed as he tugged Lily out of Sirius' lap.

"Sorry BABE, but that's my guy."

She laughed and bowed at Remus, offering him her seat.

"My apologies." She said.

Flopping down next to James she leaned on his shoulder and smiled sweetly up at him.
"How's my favorite straight guy?"

He blushed, she noted, but smiled unwavering at her non-the less.

"Great, how was your summer?"

"Remy-chan came over a lot, we went to London a couple times, the police brought us home once…"

Sirius snorted with laughter.

"Really? Good for you."

"Oh don't act so high and mighty! You're influence was the cause of it!" Remus responded, poking Sirius in the ribs.

Sirius batted his hand away and leaned in close to whisper something in his ear. Remus flushed and stood up saying, "Excuse us, we'll be right back."

He pulled Sirius out by his elbow.

"Have fun!" Lily called after them, giggling.
She turned to James and wrapped her arm around his.

"You know what? I'm bushed. I'm gonna use you as a pillow, okies?"

She stretched out across the train seat and laid her head down on his lap.

"This okay?" she asked, looking up at him.

Her heart caught in her throat when she looked in his eyes. They where full of longing and love. Full of total devotion and…heartache.

She's always said herself that the most expressive part of James was his eyes, and at that moment it was all too true.

It scared her, the look of suck pure love, and the way his forehead knit together in hope she knew there was only one way to deal with this.

Ignore it.

"Nighty-night James." She said, as chipper as ever.

The look of pain etched itself deep into his face, but he managed a nod.
She rolled on her side and closed her eyes, falling into a deep dreamless sleep.

If she had been awake, she would have felt bitter tears of a broken heart fall heavy on her cheeks.

"And you've been ignoring him because…?"

"Ignoring who?"

Remus groaned and stopped Lily in the middle of the hallway.

It was a week since they had arrived at Hogwarts, a week since Lily had saw the look of love in James' eyes, a week since they'd spoken.

"You can blow off Sirius, you can chase away Peter, but you CAN NOT lie to me, I know you too damn well."

"What are yo-"

"Say it, and I beat the crap out of you. I don't care if you're a girl or not."

Lily sighed and motioned with her hand for him to follow her.

They ended up back in the empty Gryffindor common room, and sat in a corner off the side.

"Explain." Remus demanded, crossing his arms.

"Well, when you and Sirius took off to do God knows what," she paused at this to give Remus a sarcastic smile, "I…I used James as a pillow."

"You didn't!"

"What? What'd I do?"

"Everything! Hello…can't you tell he's in love with you?"

Lily glared at him.

"Well I can tell now! When he looked at me…it was like I was water to a man dying of thirst. It…it scares me Remy-chan."

"Go talk to him Lily."

Lily shook her head, fear eating away at her insides.
"I can't."

"Why the hell not? He's been your best friend since you where eleven, you guys used to be inseparable, what happened?"

Life, she mused, but she knew that was almost entirely false.
He fell in love with me that's what happened.
She sighed outwardly.

"Ok, I'll talk to him."

Remus smiled and nodded him head.
"Good."

James flipped threw the pages of his Charms book, pausing occasionally to jot something down on his parchment.

He sighed loudly and placed his quill down on the table, taking off him glasses to rub his weary eyes.

He felt drained completely, both mentally and physically. Qudditch practices where running him ragged, and the whole situation with Lily was making his head spin.
He hadn't told her how her felt, but he knew without a doubt that she knew. He hated being so head over heals for her, not that he didn't love her, but everyone seemed to know and the where all so…SYMPATHETIC.

"Being in love with Hagrid would be a lot bloody easier," he muttered, "at least I'd know where I stand."

He picked up his quill again and started to scratch furiously away at his parchment. Maybe if worked himself into exhaustion, he could forget about Lily, and his aching heart.

A hand reached out of no where and snatched his quill away from his hand.
He turned around, ready to snap at Sirius that he was NOT in the mood, but the retort died on his lips.
It was Lily and there was a grave look in her eyes.

"We need to talk." She said earnestly.

James gulped, this didn't sound fun.
"Okay." He nodded and cleared away his books and papers making room for her. She sat down and looked helplessly around, nervously twitching her hands.

"James," she began hoarsely, "I know that…you have feelings for me, and I'd like to know…how, um, far they go."
He stared at her a minute, but then grabbed her hands and made her look him in the eyes.
"Lily, I love you so much…sometimes I forget to breathe."

Lily turned white as a sheet and jumped out of her chair.

"No!" she cried, "you can't love me!"

Several head turned in their direction and James tried vainly to quiet her.
"Why do you…my BEST friend…You…you…I HATE YOU!"

She threw his quill at him and dashed out the portrait hole, sobbing loudly.

"Well," James sighed heavily, "that went well."

How was that for an opening chapter? Hope it was okay…don't worry, there is a reason that Lily's acting like a nutter. And our dear Sirius helps her deal with what's wrong…er…somewhat. ^.^V

Next chapter:: We find out why Lily flipped, and Padfoot, Moony and Wormtail do a little nighttime spying.

Please Review!
Owari!

-Ember