DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto. I hope you find that crystal clear.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Hello everyone! I've been addicted to the Christmas song entitled, Carol of the Bells or what others may call Choir of Bells. If you don't know that song, it's the song usually sung by a choir with a fast tone, and a somewhat sad tune. So an idea struck me while I was listening to an acoustic version of the song by Paul Adams. The tune of the song sounded so desperate, so sad, yet so hopeful. This reminds me of Haruno Sakura. So here's my Christmas rendition to the SasuSaku fans out there. Happy Holidays!
Carol
of the Bells
Sasuke
X Sakura
Christmas
2006 Special
Written
by: Gensomaden-Saiyuki
"What a surprise seeing you here, Sakura-chan." A mature, yet naïve masculine voice sounded through her ears.
"Surprised? How many times have I been here?" A woman with long, pastel pink locks turned around to see the ANBU.
"Are you here on an official visit or just a casual one?"
"Both."
Haruno Sakura looked softly at the ANBU Team Captain Uzumaki Naruto. Both are still good friends, amidst trials and untried plans to retrieve a missing friend – a friend that has been missing for 10 years… a friend they can't forget, no matter how much they try to move on with their lives without him. They did move on, but things still seemed incomplete… even after 10 years. So you could tell Naruto and Sakura had matured. They're now almost 23 years old.
Sakura was clad with a red scarf, a thick white sweatshirt and a knitted red jacket. She wore black slacks and a pair of brown boots. Naruto wore the usual ANBU robe, and he had taken the mask off earlier when he had entered his office, upon seeing the Hokage's protégée.
Sakura was standing by his office's huge glass window panels, overlooking the snowy roofs of Konoha. It was also slightly snowing, yet there was hazy moonlight hovering over the Christmassy town. She sighed, "What a sad view."
"To me, it's an amazing view." Naruto grinned as he walked past her to sit on his swivel chair.
"How do you feel?"
Naruto glanced at her and his hand found its way to a picture frame standing on his desk. He took it and brought it closer to his eyes to see. His lips tugged a smile at the picture and he placed it back to where it was. He sighed and then looked at her again, "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"
"What for?"
"Every Christmas, you're on a sour mood – no, not Christmas, but every start of winter. I need to keep you on check for your mood, or else you might slit somebody's throat."
"If that happens, it would be your throat."
"How do you feel?" Naruto had asked, swiftly adjusting the atmosphere.
"Horrible."
"I guessed so," Naruto told her, "winter is dull for you, and it kills the life of your joy."
"My joy has been taken away for a long time now, Naruto. And you know that." Sakura faked a smile, "Joy is something that I have been deprived of, for 10 years… Winter reminds me of that joy… the joy that will never ever come back."
"Let's have the official matters first. What are you doing here?" the blonde asked.
"Tsunade-sama wants to ask you if you're ready for tomorrow." The green-eyed woman replied.
"I am." He sighed, "I am, but I feel terrible."
Sakura looked at her only teammate left and asked, "Why?"
"I feel excited and I feel nervous at the same time that it hurts my tummy. Isn't that a terrible feeling?" he grinned.
She chuckled at that response.
Then he spoke seriously: "And I feel terrible because… He won't see me fulfill my dream tomorrow as I take my title as Rokudaime Hokage. I also feel terrible because I wasn't able to bring him back before I even become Hokage. Our plans of retrieving him have been detected by Tsunade-baachan… A reason why she had kept you in check… a reason why her trust in you decreased… She didn't want you to go out of this town and she didn't want you to become an ANBU like I did… because she thought you might repeat the same thing you did before."
Sakura's eyes winced.
F L A S H B A C K
SLAP.
"WHAT WERE YOU TRYING TO DO?!" Tsunade yelled at the top of her lungs, "WHY DID YOU DISOBEY MY ORDERS?!?!"
Sakura received a hard slap across the face that reddened one side of her face. Naruto stood beside her.
"Tsunade-baachan… Please forgive her; she only did that to try and retrieve Sasuke." Naruto defended.
"SHUT UP!" Tsunade yelled at Naruto.
"I can't believe this!" the Hokage faced Sakura, "I'm ashamed of you! I taught you almost everything I know to make you stronger! And on this A-Rank mission, you separated from your designated team and made your way to Otogakure! If Naruto hadn't been in this mission, then you would have been declared a traitor to Konoha as well! What if you made it there?!?! What would the people tell me? The Hokage's apprentice is a traitor, too?!?!"
Yes, Sakura had tried to run away from her mission in order to pursue her own plans of retrieving Sasuke. Good thing Naruto had spotted her and stopped her from doing so, because they were in the middle of an important mission. Naruto had stopped her from her plans and brought her back on what's supposed to be done. But then, when Tsunade received the report, she then gained knowledge of what her student attempted to do. And this angered the Godaime Hokage badly.
"How can I not do that?!?" Sakura answered back with tears escaping from her eyes, "He has been missing for seven years and every recommendation Naruto and I would pass to you for your approval of getting him back… You always turned them down!"
Naruto held Sakura by her arms, to prevent her from grabbing her mentor, as she continued to scream desperately, "Tsunade-sama, I know you felt the pain I'm experiencing now! When you lost your loved ones, nothing can be any more painful… Sasuke has been missing for seven years and I haven't done anything about it! And knowing that… My heart aches everyday! And I can't keep up with what I feel! Don't you understand?!? That's why… That's why… That's why I tried to do that!"
Tsunade pitied her grieving student and she sat on her chair, rubbing her temples, "From now on, Sakura, you're banned from leaving Konoha."
Sakura's eyes widened, "What?"
"Sakura, that's an official order. Naruto, you're suspended from missions for a week." Tsunade finished, "Sakura, seven years have been a long time. If you survived seven years without him, then you still could survive seven years more, and seven more years after that, until you finally forget him. We cannot bring back someone who is stuck in his past, Sakura. I hope you understand. This is a protective measure. I'm trying to help you move on with your life."
Upon hearing that, Sakura fell to the floor and mourned, Naruto, hugging her tightly.
"How could you do this to me?!" Sakura screamed, "SASUKE-KUN!"
END OF FLASHBACK
"That was three years back, right?" Sakura sighed, "What would happen to me four years after? What would happen to me seven years after that? Just like Tsunade said… If I had survived seven years without him, then I might survive seven more years without him, and seven more years after that. But only three years had passed since that… that silly attempt."
"Sakura, I promised you that I will bring him back, right?" Naruto grinned, "Once I become Hokage, I will send troops to bring him back! That will include you and me of course!"
Sakura smiled and shook her head, "No, Naruto."
Naruto's eyes widened.
"Let's stop chasing him." A streak of tear rolled down her cheeks, "It all ends here… It's too hopeless… Ten years… Ten years was a long time… Ten years of chasing him is enough. It's like he wants to say that he… He… He will never… He will never come back home. So let's just stop. We've wasted our ten years just looking for him. We've wasted our time enough. Let's forget about him. Let's begin our lives once more, Naruto…"
Naruto looked at the picture frame that he had looked on to earlier: the picture of Team 7. Her smile… Sakura's smile on that day that photo was taken… Never will that smile be seen again. The enigma of melancholy now robes this woman.
Sakura grabbed her black knitted gloves from Naruto's desk and wore them.
She opened the door and was about to go out, "By the way, Naruto. Tsunade-sama wants me to tell you that you should report for duty in the Hokage Tower tomorrow at daybreak. Tomorrow is Christmas Day, and your inauguration as the Rokudaime Hokage. Congratulations, Merry Christmas and goodnight, Rokudaime-sama."
With that, she left and walked the streets of Konoha. She saw Christmas lanterns, snowmen, Christmas lights, Christmas trees, Christmas decorations, wreaths, fake mistletoes, people making merry, people giving gifts, people hugging, people greeting, people singing and dancing; the town was in a festive mood and is decorated all green and red, and any minute it would be Christmas Eve.
In Sakura's eyes, nothing is merry. For 10 years, she believed in no Christmas. She would fake a smile and a giggle to people who would dance around her and serenade her Christmas songs, and politely refuse to some men who would offer her gifts and drinks. The town knew this was the Hokage's student walking down the street. Yet, nobody knew the story of her decade-long loneliness.
Sakura wanted to get away from it all. For a decade, there was no Christmas for her. She made her way to her destination… the very place where she told him she loved him. The place where she offered everything she could to the boy she loved… and he turned her down harshly… She sat on the same bench she had sat on when she knew that he would come and pass along that path and betray their hometown.
In between every bench located there, was a Christmas tree, its branches covered with white snow but its top was adorned with a huge, lighted star.
The town was merry while she was not. She couldn't be merry, knowing that the only joy she knows of will never be back. Never.
Never.
Never.
She bit her lips as her swirling emotions threatened to burst, as if she wanted to commit suicide right then and there… as if she wanted to kill… as if she wanted to run away from it all…
Unable to control her overflow of emotions, she brought her hands to her face and broke down, crying loudly.
"Seven years before, seven years now, seven years after, and seven years more cannot stop me from loving you…" Sakura whispered, smokes seemingly going out of her mouth due to the intense cold outside, "You have been gone for a decade… but how could you do this to me until now? Are 10 years not enough? Do you want me to suffer 10 years more and 10 years more after that? Stop tormenting me!"
It was much better for her to blurt it out to no one than to keep it in her heart… The release will help her relieve her tension and her longing. She seemed like a broken woman – desperate, pitiful, and lonely.
She calmed down a bit, after being able to release her tension. She wiped her tears away with the back of her gloved hands. She clasped her hands together, with her head on them, and closed her eyes – she was praying. Her lips recited a silent prayer, as smoke forms with every silent word her lips utter. A gust of cold wind passed her, her long pastel locks going with it, eventually, somehow masking her face.
The snowfall stopped and strong winds blew. The leafless bushes and trees swayed, and the Christmas trees placed along the path swayed horrifically, but Sakura didn't mind – her eyes were closed and she had not a care to the world on what the hell was happening, as you could see, she was busy praying.
She could hear the bells ring from the town square. Every pound of the bells increases the sound it makes as it echoes throughout Konoha, signifying that it was Christmas Eve.
This was a ritual to her. Every Christmas Eve from the past 10 years, she would sit on that bench and pray solemnly.
And she didn't know that the star mounted on top of the Christmas tree beside her bench was blinking madly. Not only that tree, but also the other stars on every tree mounted along the pathway. Those stars weren't meant to blink – their light was supposed to be steady. The winds picked up speed and carried some snow, and made eerie howling sounds.
… And still, she didn't care on what was happening. When she prays, she ignores all distraction around her.
The full moon stopped hiding from its dark night clouds and peeked in the sky, streaks of moonlight illuminating the pathway, as the Christmas tree beside Sakura had cast a long dark shadow on the snow-covered pavement and partially on her too. The wind blew again and the stars on every tree stopped blinking. All of them lost their light for a while and each of them made a zapping sound, and eventually, their lights were brought back to its supposed stable state.
Sakura finished her long prayer and opened her eyes.
"I thought you were going to pray until morning comes." A deep masculine voice told her.
She didn't want to see who it was, probably one of her suitors, she thought. She looked at the pavement and said, "I know I could."
"Don't you want to look at me?" he asked.
"Why would I?"
"Do you know who I am?"
"I know almost everyone in Konoha. Of course I know you."
"Why are you here alone? Why don't you join the people and celebrate?"
"What is there to celebrate?"
"The Yuletide Season."
"I don't know anything like that." Sakura shook her head, "For a decade, I had known no Christmas."
"Why?" the man was actually standing in front of Sakura, but his features were hidden as the shadow cast by the Christmas tree fell on him. He was looking at Sakura.
Sakura could tell that the person was standing right in front of her, yet she refused to see him. She will not look at any other man's face aside from Sasuke – Naruto was an exemption, since she was his friend.
She sighed and tried to sit comfortably on the bench, "Why would I celebrate? There is no joy for me."
"Did your boyfriend leave you?"
"He's not my boyfriend, but yes, he left me… He left me 10 years ago…"
"Do you love him?"
Sakura bit her lips at that question. She faked a laugh and said, "Would I wait for nothing like this every Christmas if I don't love him? Of course I love him… My love for him is unwavering… Though I know there's no possibility that he will love me. I know he won't."
"Then why are you waiting for him still?"
"I just want him to come back." Sakura plastered a fake smile, "I just want him back here. That's all I could ever ask for... impossible as it may seem."
"So you're waiting for nothing?"
"It's stupid, right? I'm the Godaime Hokage's student and I still don't know that waiting for nothing is stupid." Sakura shook her head in ridicule, "Love makes me stupid. The stupidest thing I ever did for him in his 10 years of absence was disobey my own mentor, the Godaime Hokage. Three years ago, during an A-Rank mission, I separated from my team and tried to go to Otogakure… Good thing the upcoming Rokudaime Hokage, Uzumaki Naruto, my teammate, spotted me and stopped me from doing so. And Tsunade-sama, upon hearing that, was so enraged that she banned me from going out of Konoha."
"So you're not allowed to leave Konoha forever?"
"That's the word of the Hokage." She sighed, "I have to follow."
"Why do you love him when you know he's not coming back?"
"I don't have a reason of loving him. I don't need a reason to love him. I love him simply because he is he. I love him simply because he completes me. I will love him, even if he won't love me back."
The bells at the town square rung again. With every pound, the sound grows. And the gust of wind goes again, swaying the trees around the two. The moon bashfully hid in its dark night clouds; therefore, the shadow hiding the man before her had disappeared.
"I love that man… Uchiha Sasuke is his name." Sakura smiled, and tears were brimming in her eyes, "What a wonderful name for a wonderful man."
"What is wonderful in a man who doesn't love?"
"Everything." Sakura replied, as tears escaped from her eyes, "He doesn't need my love, what he needs is revenge. So that's what he's doing right now… And I know… Now that he has been away for 10 years, he can be away for 10 years more, 10 years more after that, and until the year I die, he will always be away from Konoha. If I will die, I will die waiting for him, and no one else."
"Don't you want to look at me? Do you know who I am?" the man asked again.
Sakura, knowing that he had already asked the question earlier, said: "Haven't you asked those earlier? Why are you asking me so many questions?"
"Why do you keep answering them, then?" he sounded like he chuckled.
Annoyed, Sakura looked up to the man who was talking to her. And upon looking, her eyes widened with her pupils trembling, and her hands trembled as well. Her heart paced and pounded hard that it was audible in her ears, and her breathing paced.
The bells at the town square were madly ringing, their pounding sounds echoing all throughout Konoha.
She was quickly on her feet, and stared at him. She shook her head and started to pace back to Konoha, "This can't be true! Maybe I'm getting lightheaded!"
"When you can't see it, you're brave. But when you do, you run away." Uchiha Sasuke hissed, "Sakura, you've always been a coward. You never changed at all."
"This is just a genjutsu!" Sakura made a handseal and exclaimed, "Genjutsu Kai!" (Genjutsu Kai Genjutsu Cancel)
But Sasuke didn't disappear. This wasn't a genjutsu… This was no illusion. This is for real.
Sakura's eyes welled up again and she was frozen there on the spot, she was shaking her head in disbelief.
She thought that this isn't him, but she knew that he is. He had changed a lot, that's why she didn't notice. And let's say she changed, too, another factor that had added as to why she didn't notice that it was him.
"You have proven your love for me over and over again, even when I'm not around." Sasuke started to walk towards her, "I told you that I don't need your care. I don't need your love."
Sakura started walking backwards and covered her ears.
"That was before." Sasuke stopped in his tracks and looked at her, "10 years seemed long enough."
"You noticed?" Sakura yelled, "I grieved for you for 10 years! And I surrendered all hopes of finding you, because I did what I could… And I know that you can't find the happiness your heart is looking for if you stay here."
"And now what would you do? Cry until you die?" Sasuke started walking again.
Sakura silently walked away from him, never looking back. But in a flash, Sasuke appeared in front of her and held her wrist. This was dejavu to the both of them.
"What for, Sasuke?" Sakura's voice was trembling, "Why are you here?"
Sakura's tears escaped and said, "Why now? Why did you come back after 10 years? Why?! WHY, SASUKE, WHY?!"
"I cannot be an avenger if I am with you." Sasuke answered, "Even without you saying anything, or doing anything… You stop me from pursuing what is just but right."
"What is right in treason? What is right in vengeance? What is right in the face of evil?" Sakura said through gnashed teeth, "You were willing to become Orochimaru's dog! Was that right?"
"Leave." Sakura abruptly walked past him, "Leave before I drag you out."
"I'm already here, why would you want me out? You told me a while ago you wanted me back. So here I am."
Sakura walked faster and ignored him, pretending not to hear anything at all.
"I thought you loved me?" Sasuke asked, "You told me that when I left and you just told me you still do a while ago. How come you walk away now?"
Sakura closed her eyes and strode away.
"That was the only encouragement I had ever since." Sasuke told her.
"What is encouragement in three words that came out from a weak person?" Sakura turned and looked at him fiercely, "Love is a weakness. And that's true… For 10 years… For 10 years that you have been gone in this town and in my life… love is a weakness… and I've proven that. Look at me now… I am this much damaged because of loving you." Sakura shook her head and sighed, "Of all people whom I can love, why did it have to be you?"
"You think I never thought of you while I was away?" Sasuke said monotonously, trying keep his swelling anger, "For 10 years Sakura…For 10 years I have lost my identity!"
"LOST?!?!?!" Sakura can't help but yell now, "HOW DARE YOU SAY YOU LOST YOUR IDENTITY, HUH?!?! DON'T YOU REMEMBER ANYTHING AT ALL?!?! SINCE THE VERY DAY YOU LEFT KONOHA, YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN YOUR IDENTITY!!! You never lost it… oh no, you didn't… You voluntarily left your identity. You no longer go by the name I spoke of; or by the eyes that I have known of, or by the soul that I yearned for, or by the heart that I tried to thaw from the cold… I don't know you."
"Fine then, I will leave as you believe the traitor that I am." Sasuke turned his back and started walking the snowy pavements leading to the exit of Konoha, "But I want to ask you this question… Have you forgotten your love for me?"
Sakura's eyes widened at that question and they softened in sorrow. Her glassy eyes turned to look at the snowy pavements, as it started to snow again.
Sasuke looked back at her and took her silence as 'yes' to his question. His melancholy eyes diverted their gaze from her and he said, "I see."
He stopped from his tracks and sighed out, "Sakura, you changed. You're a liar now. You told me a while ago that your love for me is unwavering… and it wasn't true."
And he then continued walking out of Konoha once and for all.
Sakura's eyes widened at this thought: "If he leaves now, he's gone forever…"
She began walking, "If he leaves now, my hope is doomed."
And now she runs, "My prayers were answered, but when I saw it coming, I threw it off."
Faster, "If I failed to stop him before, I will be doomed if I fail again today."
Faster, "Grant my Christmas wish: please stay…"
Sakura cried once again as she found herself staring at his back, like she once did before, and thought: "I hate it when I see your back… I hate it when you walk away from me…"
She finally caught up with Sasuke and latched herself onto him, her arms wrapped around tightly around his chest, as she buried her face on his back and cried.
Sasuke's eyes widened as he saw a pair of familiar hands on his chest and the sobbing of a woman on his back.
Through her muffled voice, he heard: "If you leave me again… I'll scream out loud…"
"You're annoying." He replied. This is dejavu indeed…
"I love you, Sasuke-kun… I love you… I love you more than life itself… I love you a million times more than ever… So don't leave me…"
Sasuke turned around and looked at Sakura who was crying more and more. Sakura shook her head and embraced him tightly and mourned.
He firmly wrapped his arms around her and his deep voice sounded, "You really are annoying…"
She looked up at him with weary eyes.
"I love you." Sasuke told her and brushed his lips against hers.
The snowfall became heavier and the pounding of the bells at the town square was heard once more. The gusts of wind blew and the two seemed like statues… the epitome of a sad love, yet the love was so passionate and hopeful.
For once, time seemingly stood still as the two lovers were reunited.
After 10 years of mourning… This Christmas begs to differ...
Love is unfazed against winter's violent sorrow.
It was indeed a merry Christmas for Sasuke and Sakura as they were finally in each other's arms.
Love
is very patient,
Very
kind
Love
knows no jealousy;
Love
makes no parade,
Gives
itself no airs
Is
never rude,
Never
selfish,
Never
irritated,
Never
resentful,
Love
is never glad when others go wrong,
Love
is gladdened by goodness,
Always
slow to expose,
Always
eager to believe the best,
Always
hopeful,
Always
patient
Love
never disappears…
(1 Corinthians 13:4 – 8)
THE END
Merry Christmas to all!
A/N: Yes, this is quite a long one, neh? I hope you guys didn't mind if I also included there a passage from the Holy Bible to end the story… It actually describes Sasuke and Sakura's love for each other here in this story. I was really moved upon hearing the acoustic tune of Carol of the Bells. Like I said, the tune sounded so desperate, so sad, yet so hopeful. I hope you felt all that in this long oneshot.
I hope you all loved the story.
Happy holidays!
+Releina Artemis+
