I came up with this one-shot one day when I was just having a bad day and I listened to this song called Bleed for Me by Saliva. It's a Sasuke Christmas one-shot, even though I've been told it's a little depressing--Someone actually cried upon reading it...--so... yeah. I shall take this moment to say that I am NOT SUICIDAL and I HAVE NOT ever ATTEMPTED SUICIDE. This was out of pure imagination, not personal experience XDDDDD

BLEED FOR ME

Akayuki no Chi

Tentatively I stood there, standing precariously on the ledge of an apartment building and gazing upon the streets of Konoha. The tears falling down alabaster cheeks became like frost against my skin and snowflakes from the light snowfall disappeared into a cameo appearance in my hair. I looked upon the supposed "winter wonderland" below in contempt. Fools, the people were. Christmas time was the time I hated most. Family . . . cheer . . . All things I did not really have anymore. Only one person matters . . . and he‛s unaware of my existence.

His name is Uchiha Sasuke. Like many girls in Konoha, I‛d been struck with Cupid‛s arrow the moment I first truly laid eyes on him in freshman year. Automatically, I was captured by his handsome ashen face, dark bedroom eyes, the way his charcoal bangs hung over each side of his face, and especially the rare, but occasional, smile. I would revel in how his eyes always seemed to know what was going on. But he only seemed to look right through me.

My grip on my chest tightened as if to null the pain gathering in the deep chasm that had once been filled with heart-warming thoughts of what could be. Now, there were only empty thoughts of what could have been, or what I could have done ot get him to notice me.

Hesitance was with me as my boots shifted, leaving slight imprints in the light snowfall and I took in what I hoped to be only the last few moments of my life. It had only been on this rooftop lately that I find a moment‛s peace. Only fitting to let it be where I have my last few breathes.

Always I had thought I would be too afraid to commit suicide and yet here I was, my life hanging in the balance, I was on the brink of death. An oddly ironic thought. Another was my name, now that I thought about it. Akayuki no Chi, which could be translated to blood of the red snow. In moments, it would be my blood dyeing the snow red. My death is to be an object of irony . . .

Finally, the fear I had been waiting for began to rise in my belly as I lifted one foot into the air, bringing myself one step closer to death. The moment of truth had come. Did I have the guts to do it? Fall to my death and end my life in a way I imagined to be painful?

I took one last deep breath . . . let it out . . . and fell.

Time and motion seemed to slow down the moment my other foot left the ledge and I opened my arms wide. Weight seemed to be only a figment of the imagination, air rushing past my skin and blowing through my hair. I closed my eyes and my senses intensified for that brief moment. A small smile came across my lips for the first time in the longest of times.

My eyes opened, and just before I would hit the snow-covered concrete to meet my demise, they met with the eyes of one whom I had admired for so long. Onyx eyes met with silvern ones and his stare showed a flicker of surprise, perhaps even . . . concern?

There was a flutter in my heart the moment I hit the ground and pain shot through my being. Nonetheless, even as my heart beat slowed or my eyes began to glaze over and the sounds of some people scrambling ot call 911 faded from my hearing, my lips curled into a wider and more satisfied smile.

He noticed me . . .

Uchiha Sasuke

His first Christmas alone, the boy sat on a park bench with cold eyes glaring ahead of him. Dressed warmly in many layers of clothing and a scarf, his face below the eyes was obscured from view. This park . . . many memories were coming back to him. Memories of which his parents were still alive, and he would play, be it with his parents or older brother. But now his parents were dead and his brother, the murderer.

Amongst the boy‛s angst-filled thoughts, a girl with silver eyes and snow white hair came into view, smiling widely and staring into his face, unblinking. "Hi!"

His eyes narrowed. "What do you want?" he asked, noticing the red dodge ball in her hands.

Her smile widened, "Play with me."

"What?" he asked.

"Play with me." she repeated.

"Why?"

"You look sad. And I need someone to play with. I‛m Chi."

"Sasuke."

"Nice to meet you, Sasuke. Will you play with me?" she asked a third time, sounding hopeful.

"No," Sasuke replied bluntly, wanting to be left alone and wishing for Chi to leave. Much to his dismay, she instead sat down next to him. Annoyed, and not understanding her actions, he asked, "Aren‛t you gonna leave?"

"Nope."

". . . Why not? It‛s Christmas, don‛t you want to be with your . . . family?"

"I can‛t let you be alone. Like you said, it‛s Christmas. No one should have to spend it alone."

"Who said I‛m --"

"I can tell. You‛re sad and lonely, and so am I. I thought maybe . . ." Her eyes became sad as she stared at the ball. "No one should have to spend Christmas alone . . . My parents died awhile ago and my brother doesn‛t like to be with me, anymore. Baa-chan‛s busy making dinner . . . You?"

"My brother killed ev‛rybody but me. I dunno where he is . . ."

"I‛m sorry . . ."

"It‛s not your fault . . ."

Silence. Why wouldn‛t she leave him alone? She was only sitting there and staring at the ball. Sasuke couldn‛t think of an answer and it was annoying the heck out of him. Then, suddenly, her expression had become bright and she stood up, turning to face him once again and extending her gloved hand. He gave her a questioning look.

"I‛m taking you home, so you can spend Christmas with me, Obaa-chan, Aniki, Ojii-san, and everyone. Come on."

"But I don‛t --"

"Come on," She urged, taking his hand in hers and trying to pull him off the bench to follow her.

Annoyed by her antics, Sasuke obliged. "Fine."

I had thought she was another one of those annoying girls that always seemed to hang around me when they could, like Sakura or Ino. One of those fangirls, but that hadn‛t been the case. I was very judgmental back then as I am now, not caring to get to know somebody before labeling them as "annoying" or "not worth my time". But she had been worth it.

"Obaa-chan! Obaa-chan! I brought a friend! Can he stay with us?"

"Of course, Chi-chan. Who‛s your little friend?"

"His name‛s Sasuke."

It was supposed to be the first Christmas I would spend by myself, but she and her family had welcomed me into their home like I was part of their family. For the first time in a long time, I‛d felt as if I was part of a family, even if I had to much pride to admit it. I had . . . fun.

"Oh! Looks like Sasuke-kun got Chi under the mistletoe!" Chi‛s grandmother had teased when Chi and Sasuke came into the house again after playing. They had arrived through the doorway at the same time, wanting to escape the cold temperatures of the outside.

"Mistletoe?" he questioned, looking up. A small blush came to his cheeks as he saw the small plant hanging in the center of the doorframe, right above their heads. Chi was doing the same.

"Well, go on. Just a quick one on the cheek, it‛s tradition."

Reluctantly, and with much embarrassment, Sasuke gave Chi a quick peck on the cheek.

Admittedly, the part with the mistletoe had been the most embarrassing for me at that age, but now it was a pleasant memory as I stroked the cheek I had kissed years ago. It has been a little over a week since Chi attempted suicide, and she stillhas not woken up yet.

Not like I‛ve been here the whole time, in fact this is the first time that I‛m visiting her. A little out-of-character for me, I‛ll admit. I barely know her, despite the fact that she sits behind me in three classes. But something had bothered me the moment our eyes had met as she was falling. And the image of her impact was haunting my subconscious.

In my mind‛s eye, I kept seeing her. Legs sprawled in strange angles, random pieces of bone sticking out of her arms, some in her chest. Blood had been pooling around her, dyeing the snow and even a part of her hair red. It‛s possibly it may stay that way permanently. The color in her face besides those of bruises and cuts had also flushed her face.

I pulled a chair from near the window and brought it to the side of her bed, sitting in it backwards but facing her. My left arm used the back as an arm rest and I took her hand in my other one. It was the only place on her body with a minimal amount of damage and also cold to the touch, adding to the illusion of lifelessness with her shallow breathing. But the heart monitor was arguing otherwise.

This was a strange feeling rising inside me, one I hadn‛t felt in a long time. I think it was worry or sorrow, maybe even a mixture of the two. This whole scenario was giving me flashbacks to the time of my parent‛s deaths. It had happened around Christmas time, just like Chi‛s suicide attempt had. I had asked Santa to bring them back, but of course that didn‛t happen. I had lost any Christmas spirit.

Strange it was that I was wishing for a Christmas miracle to help Chi. It happened to a lot of people, right? It‛s not just one of those things in the movies and it can happen regardless of the non-existent Santa Clause?

And what had made her want to jump off of the building in the first place? A victim of severe depression myself, I had also let thoughts of suicide cross my mind, and I may have cut once or twice, but I had been filled more with thoughts of revenge than anything else.

My attention was taken away from thoughts inside my own mind as she shifted, slightly. A moan or groan of pain following.

Akayuki no Chi

Beep . . . Beep . . . Beep . . . Beep . . ., That sound . . . What was it? Beep . . . Beep . . . Beep . . . Beep . . ., Was I in a hospital or something? . . . But for who? Beep . . . Beep . . . Beep . . . Beep . . ., A sharp pain shot through my chest as I tried sitting up, leading down to my ribs, and reverberating through my body. It was aching. Were you supposed to feel pain when you were dead?

Slowly, I tried opening my eyes, only to find that my eyelids felt extremely heavy and I had to squint since my eyes stung from being in darkness for so long. I realized that I was staring up at tile. White tile . . .

Wait a second . . . That sound was measuring my pulse. Wires were attaching me to a bunch of machines. Somone‛s hand was stroking my skin. I was feeling pain because I was alive. I‛m . . . alive

But how? I fell from so high . . . Gah, I can‛t even commit suicide right . . ., So that explained the pain I was feeling, though that was probably being diminished through pain killers, but how could I not have succeeded? I sigh inwardly and sulk for a few moments before I realized that I wasn‛t alone in the hospital room. Someone, I could tell, was stoking the back of my hand.

Stiffly, for my head felt heavy as well, I tried turning my head, grunting with effort until my eyes found his. My silvern orbs were looking into his emotionless ones again, only to find that there was a sort of emotion in there that I had never seen before . . . hope. Each sweep of his thumb against my hand sent the heart monitor raging.

"Sa . . . Sasuke-san?" I whispered hoarsely.

His gaze left mine, traveling to my body, taking in all of the injuries I had, or he was simply trying to avoid looking into my eyes. "Yeah . . ."

"But . . . wh-why?"

"I don‛t think you should be the one asking that question."

I looked away, sheepishly. "I was tired of living. I couldn‛t take living each day and feeling worthless, or feeling like I don‛t belong. I have no purpose in life anymore, Sasuke."

"I‛m sure you--"

"No, I don‛t. Especially since Rei died. You know, my brother? I looked up to him, and he committed suicide because a girl he loved dumped him. I . . . I wanted to go the same way. The guy I like I thought didn‛t even remember my existence . . ."

". . ."

"Why are you here? We haven‛t spoken since that Christmas after your parents died . . . And now suddenly you‛re here at my bedside? Not that I‛m complaining . . ."

"Yeah, I know . . . I‛ll admit that I‛m not one for keeping up with being social . . . And we went to different elementary and middle schools . . . You didn‛t really try being social, either."

I attempted to make a face. "Still . . . I at least acknowledged you . . ." A pain in my chest again . . . But why? He‛s here now, but I‛m being bitter.

". . . I‛m sorry," he said, seemingly sincere as he looked into my eyes. "I‛ve been foolish. I haven‛t really caught my Christmas spirit this year, either, and I realize that I can do better than this . . . But I‛m glad that you‛re okay . . . Santa came through this year . . ." He revealed, a slight smile coming ot his lips. "Christmas miracles do exist . . ."

"What are you talking about?" He‛s . . . glad?

"Just thinking out loud . . . I . . . was worried . . ."he admitted, color coming to his face. "And I feel like I should have known something was up. At school, I saw the cuts near your wrists, sometimes, but I never thought anything of it. I never put two and two together . . . Not even the way your face always bleed scarlet . . ."

I felt my cheeks warm up now, signaling that they were becoming the named color now. "You . . . noticed that?"

The color on his face deepened, "I . . . might have."

Despite the pain, I forced myself to sit up a little, so that my face would be level with his. He immediately voiced his disapproval, but I signaled him to stop. "You‛re saying that all this time . . . You‛ve known that I‛m here? That I exist?"

"If it will make you lay back down, then yeah, I have. Lately, ever since you fell, I haven‛t been able to get you off of my mind. Now lay back down."

"You noticed me?"

"Yes, now lay back down."

An unexplainable glee coursed it‛s way through my veins. All this time . . . He really had noticed me . . . All this time, I wasn‛t invisible to his eyes. I was too excited to lay down, despite how much my body protested. I was happy . . . I was happy.

"Chi, I‛m not going to tell you again, lay back down, before I push you down."

With a wider smile than I had ever worn in ages, I did as told, hardly taking notice of the sharp pains in my chest, ribs, and other places on my body. But . . . there was something else that I noticed in the tile above, that wasn‛t there before. "Mistletoe . . ."

Sasuke looked above and saw it, too, a slight smile coming to his own lips as he looked at me. "Well, it is Christmas Eve . . ." Lightly, but still with a hint if passion that sent the heart monitor raging again, he kissed me, but on the lips. Pulling away, part-ways, so that he was still a few inches from my face, he said solemnly.

"I‛m sorry you had to bleed for me . . ."

End of BLEED FOR ME

Thanks for reading!! Review please?