Title: The Present

Rating: PG-13?

Warnings: Slashy.

Pairing: Jak/Human!Dax

A/N: A very silly fic. Takes place during/after Jak II. FFN's formatting is currently driving me stark raving mad, because it refuses to do what I want. Forgive me.

Keira was sipping on her third cup of coffee when she heard it. It was faint, muffled by the walls of the underground base, but her keen ears still picked up the sound. She heaved a sigh and poured another helping of creamer into her coffee.

"They're at it again already?" Tess pulled out the chair across her and plopped down in it. "Torn's going to be in a foul mood today."

The green-haired girl nodded her assent. "It doesn't surprise me that there's so much noise, though. Daxter never shuts up." She smiled fondly, but winced when the sound came again. "I mean, I understand that he's back to his old self, and is positively thrilled about wearing pants, but... this is ridiculous."

The blonde giggled. "I'd be pretty eager too, after being cooped up in an Ottsel body for so many years! We should give them some slack."

"AHH, Jak!"

The two girls fell dead silent for a moment, having both heard the very clear cry ring down the hallways. They stared at each other, then simultaneously burst into uncontrollable laughter. "They - heehee! - they should keep it down, or else Torn's going to kick their door in and see more than anybody ever wanted him to." Keira was almost in tears from laughing so hard.

"Aw, but then we'd have to pay for his therapy. Besides, it's pathetically obvious what they're doing in there. I doubt even Torn is bold enough to burst in on that."

"He's been complaining that they're so noisy, we'll be discovered!"

"You're kidding! Well, I suppose that comes as no surprise. I imagine he's just bitter because he hasn't gotten laid ever since he joined this organization. Sex takes too much time away from strategizing, if you ask him." Tess shrugged. "Not that I haven't tried, mind you, but that man is the king of dense."

"I heard from Dax that Jak is almost as bad." Keira sipped at her coffee again, and decided it needed more sugar. "Poor boy had to actually spell out for him what he wanted. I think there may have been a chalkboard and diagrams involved." She grinned as she spooned enough sugar into her coffee to make Daxter in his Ottsel form hyper for days.

"Well, that's our Jak. He's a single-minded fellow; god help him if there's a meteor aimed at his head while he's in the middle of a fight."

"He'd keep fighting with a crater in his skull!" Keira slapped the table as she laughed. "Oh... by the way, I got them a present."

Tess arched an eyebrow, curious. "You don't mean..."

"That thing we were talking about?"

"Oh, Keira! You didn't!" Tess gaped as Keira nodded, then her face split into a grin. "That's great! Do you have it with you? When do you want to give it to them?"

Keira laughed. "I figured I'd present it to Jak when he came down for his morning coffee. It's right here under my chair." She nudged a small cardboard box with her foot. "He can decide for himself how to get Daxter to use it, if at all."

"Man, Jak's going to..."

"I'm gonna what?" Both girls looked up as a scruffy, bed-rumpled Jak walked into the room, looking for a spare coffee cup. They both sniggered quietly when they noticed a bright, fresh hickey that Jak was sporting low on his neck. The tips of his ears were tinged pink, too, like someone had just been nipping at them a few minutes ago.

"Oh, nothing." Keira beamed and cast a conspiratory glance at Tess. The blonde girl nodded eagerly. "But, well... Tess and I got you a present."

Jak finished filling his coffee mug (he took his brew black) and turned to Keira. "Really?" A small smile spread over his face (his smiles were never big), before he asked, "What is it?"

The girls glanced at each other again before Keira pulled out the box. "It's, um... something that we thought might be... useful."

Jak padded over to the table and set his cup down to lift the lid off the box. His blue eyes went wide in shock. "Uh, girls, you, uh. Shouldn't have. Um." His face slowly turned a bright shade of red.

"Aw, you don't like it?" Tess pouted. "We thought it would be perfect."

Poor Jak seemed at a complete loss for words. "It's a... a-a-a..."

Keira chimed in and increased Jak's vocabulary. "It's a ball gag."

Dead silence. Jak seemed to be contemplating the gag in the box. "Uh, I see." He replaced the lid. "Erm... thanks, girls." He tucked the box under his arm, and marched out.

The two of them dissolved into laugher once more. "I don't know," Tess said once she could breathe again, "do you think he'll actually use it? He seemed downright flabbergasted."

Keira grinned slyly into her coffee cup. "He took it with him, didn't he?"

They managed to keep their humor down until that night, when they heard an indignant howl come from poor Daxter, then dead, blessed silence.

Torn came banging on Tess and Keira's room door to tell them to keep the hysterics down, they were surely alerting the Krimzon Guards with such an unholy racket.