Hello guys!
So. I came to a realization this morning: I do not have to write smut to be a popular and successful author on this site. In fact, some of my favorite fanfics at the moment are not smutty. So... here's some fluff :D Don't worry, though, I'll still be writing some dirty stuff. *smiles wryly* I practically live for slash :)
Rated teen for some adult themes, but it doesn't go in to detail at all, so it's just to be safe.
By the way, they're playing my favorite card game of all time: Apples to Apples. I don't think I ever actually said that in the fic :P
Hope you all like it!
Oh, and I don't own glee *sniffles*, or any of the characters, or anything glee related except my DVDs and fun little fanfics :)
"Ok, Kurt, your turn!"
"Yeah, go on, draw a card."
The room was a cacophony of noise. Between the talking, singing, and the crumpling of chip bags, it was almost impossible to hear yourself think. But, somehow the glee club managed. All of them were crowded around Rachel's dining room table, only just being able to cram everyone in. Rachel was sitting on Finn, and Quinn was sitting on Puck, while Santana and Brittany kept switching positions on their shared chair. Tina was sharing Artie's wheelchair, and in return offered to hand him his cards, since he couldn't reach the table with everyone in the way. The rest of the boys, apart from Kurt at least, apparently didn't feel comfortable with sharing a seat with another guy. So, the rest of the poor lonely boys sat by themselves.
And that was how they managed to fit twelve screaming high schoolers around a tiny dining table. One would have thought it impossible, but apparently they were wrong.
Somehow managing to reach across the table to the stack of cards, Kurt deliberately slid the top card off of the stack. He brought it back towards him, and after much begging from his impatient teammates, finally read the word.
"Sensual." He grinned, "tactile, pleasing, sexual."
"Damn, Kurt, that is the perfect card for you" Mercedes winked at him, and they wiggled their fingers together, and pushed back their bangs in sync, causing much laughter from around the table.
"Alright everyone. Your cards, please?" He motioned with his hands for them to deposit the cards on the table, then sat back to watch them struggle.
It was always extremely difficult for the glee clubbers to make decisions, except of course for Rachel who always had an answer for everything. So it took them quite some time to place all eleven red cards in front of Kurt. But, finally, with a slight grimace, Puck finally tossed the last card into the pile. Thankfully, it landed right side up.
Kurt meticulously gathered the cards together, making sure they all faced the same direction in the little stack, and that they were perfectly aligned, before silently reading through the options. The room had become unreasonably quite as they waited for his decision, the only sound coming from the ipod in the corner they had long since forgotten in the hubbub.
After what seemed like hours of suspense, Kurt raised one eyebrow and finally broke the silence.
"Ok, who played 'My Body'? 'Cause if it's any of you boys, I think we need to have a little talk," he smirked at the group as the girls giggled and the boys looked around at each other awkwardly.
"It wasn't me," Finn said, perhaps a little too quickly. "I wouldn't say that about another dude. No offense."
"None taken," Kurt replied good naturedly, though everyone knew (except perhaps Finn himself) that Kurt wished it had been him.
Meanwhile, Rachel looked over, smiled at him, and planted a big kiss on his lips, earning a grin from Finn and a look of disgust from the card holder.
Obviously, that was what she had been going for.
Shoving his depressing thoughts away, Kurt continued grilling the rest of the group. All of the girls claimed that if they had played it, they would have confessed immediately. I mean, of course they all thought he was sexy, and why wouldn't they tell him so?
"And this is why, boys, I hang out with them, and not you." Kurt giggled at their fawning over him, and then went back to investigating.
The group began socializing again while Kurt pondered who might have played the card. It's not like it was any big deal, the game was about trying to win, and whoever played the card could have just been appealing to his conceited side. The card should have meant nothing, and yet, because of the player's silence, it now meant everything. It was now even more necessary to find out who played that card.
After a few minutes, Kurt heard a voice from beside him speak up. "Puck did it," Brittany claimed. "He's been staring at Kurt for like, ten minutes. Or was it hours…?" She paused for a moment, deep in thought "I get confused sometimes," She bluntly revealed to Kurt and all else who was listening. He patted her on the arm consolingly, and then turned back to the group, eyeing Puck seriously. Puck was now silently examining his arm muscles. That boy was way too conceited for his own good. Realizing that the table had gone silent, and they were all looking at him, he finally looked up.
"Okay, fine. I played that card. Big deal."
"Obviously it was, since you wouldn't confess to playing it until put on the spot," Kurt replied mischievously.
"So? Maybe I just wasn't paying attention."
"Oh, come on. It was your idea to play this game. Why would you suddenly zone out when we just started playing?" Mercedes gave him a look, daring him to escape her obviously flawless logic.
"Whatever," he mumbled and looked away, desperately wishing they would all stop staring at him. Normally, he would invite any type of attention. But this? This was torturous.
"Really, Puck, just fess up already," Santana, of all people, added. "We all know you're bi."
By "we all" she must have meant her and Brittany, because the rest of the club's faces had looks of shock.
Brittany nodded slowly, twirling her ponytail, "Yeah, I saw you making out with…. What was his name?"
"Samuel," Santana provided.
"Yeah… him"
Quinn giggled from her place across the room, having seen close up how red the boy's face had become.
"Alright guys. Fine. You got me. A few weeks ago I had a realization: I was such a badass, why did I have to be limited to the girls? I should spread the luck around a little." He grinned seductively at the group, which both giggled and looked at him like he'd finally lost his marbles.
Kurt finally interjected, having understood what exactly was going on. "So you're saying you've got the hots for me?"
"Of course, baby." Puck wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, while Kurt squirmed awkwardly in his seat, eyes wide.
"Okay," Quinn interjected, having accidentally glanced at the growing bulge in his pants "I am getting off of you now. You're grossing out my baby."
Finn's eyebrows went together in confusion, "But, Quinn… you're not pregnant anymore…are you?"
"Of course not, Finn, you were there when little Beth came out. But it's an excuse to get away from Puck, and I really needed that right now."
The group laughed, and Puck tried to look offended, and failed.
Quinn safely standing on the other side of the room, Puck and Kurt went back to just looking at each other, while the rest of the group tittered awkwardly about this new turn of events. Kurt was wearing much the same face he had when he found out the glee club was doing gaga, while Puck just looked sexy. But then, he usually did.
Eventually Puck stood up and walked around the table until he arrived behind Kurt. He put his hands on the smaller boy's shoulders, and leaned over to whisper in his ear, "So whataya say, baby? You, me, maybe take off some of these clothes?" He lifted up his shirt a little, showing Kurt just exactly what that could mean.
Kurt's eyes twinkled, "Well, this is certainly a tempting offer. But I'm afraid I'll have to decline."
"What? Are you questioning my badassness? I mean really, who wouldn't want to tap this?"
Tina raised her hand tentatively, and Artie reassured her that it was a rhetorical question.
"No, I'm perfectly happy with you looks, Noah," Kurt said, eyes raking over Puck's well toned muscles. "I just don't think Rachel would be too happy with us doing the nasty on her bed. Especially when her dads could walk in on us at any moment."
"To hell with Rachel. She invited us here, she can deal with us."
"One moment." Kurt stood up, and walked over to where Rachel was sitting, put a hand on her shoulder, and asked as politely as possible, "Rachel, I formally request the use of your bedroom until further notice." Then, without waiting for an answer, said "Thanks, I knew you'd agree."
He walked quickly away from her and towards the staircase, wiggling his hips as he went. When at the bottom of the stairs, he called over his shoulder, "Come along, Noah!"
Rachel, finally realizing what was going on, yelled "Wait! That bedroom is exclusively reserved for me and F-" she stopped, realized what she was about to say, and decided against it. Her face now a bright red, she added "Just… don't get anything on my bed!"
The group laughed good naturedly, and decided to continue their card game as if none of this had even happened. Rachel was of course, a little frazzled, and Finn was still trying to figure out just how long his friend had liked guys and just when exactly he had been planning on telling him. Quinn was quite happy to have a place to sit again, and though she was a little distraught at the fact that her almost-boyfriend had ditched her yet again, she was happy enough for Kurt that she didn't feel too bad. She knew first hand that Puck was actually quite good in bed.
The rest of the group was either confused, jealous, or just plain ready to be done with this whole fiasco.
So they continued playing, trying to ignore the sounds coming from above them.
One way or another, everyone agreed it had been a good night.