This is going to be a short fanfic based on Gilbert's perspective after the proposal. Hope you enjoy! Keep an eye out for quotes from movies, songs and TV shows (maybe you'll recognise a few!)

Gilbert walked back numbly from the orchard. He had been such a fool to misinterpret all those looks, all the blushes. Anne was right why did he have to go and spoil everything. On the way, back to where he was staying, he ran into Ronald Stuart.

"Whatever's the matter Blythe? Has somebody died?" he laughed, when Gilbert didn't join in he realised that something was indeed wrong and put a hand on the Gilbert's shoulder. "What's wrong? Is there anything I can do?"
Gilbert shook his head and sighed, "It would be extremely helpful if you happened to have a time travel machine, but I don't suppose that you would have one just lying about."
"I'm afraid not." Ronald replied, "I'll walk back with you of you want." He added. Gilbert shrugged, it didn't matter if anyone was with him or not. He wouldn't be doing much talking, "Do what you want, I won't be very good company if that's what you're looking for."
Ronald looked at his friend and took pity on him, "I don't mind. Come on then."

They walked the entire way in silence, one not knowing what to say, and the other not wishing to say anything at all. Ronald walked Gilbert to his bedroom and gave him a pat on the back, "You know where to find me if you want to talk.".
Gilbert didn't meet his friend's eyes but nodded. As Ronald left, he turned to look at Gilbert before he left. The poor man looks absolutely distraught, he's a wreck, he thought to himself, I wonder what has happened.

Gilbert went straight to his bed, not bothering to change or even wash. He just lay atop of the blankets and faced the wall, his back to the world.

Ronald knocked on Gilbert's door. Two days had past it was approaching afternoon of the third and no one had seen him around, so he had decided to take matters into his own hands.
"Are you in there?" he called, "People are worried about you Blythe."
He heard footsteps coming towards the door and was greeted to the face of a sleep deprived and depressed young man.
"Good God!" Ronald exclaimed as he went into the bedroom, "You need some light and fresh air in here. Have you eaten or drunk at all?" he asked as he yanked apart the curtains and opened the window. Gilbert remained silent and lay back down on his bed. Ronald stood over him, "Come one, you need eat something. Can I get you anything?"
"I'm not hungry." Gilbert mumbled.
"You'll starve yourself! You need to have at least some bread."
"A human can go for more than three weeks with any food." Gilbert replied monotonously. His friend folded his arms, "Come on Gilbert, you need to get up. It won't do just staying in your room and wasting away." Gilbert put his pillow over his head,
"What if I want to waste away?" he challenged. Ronald tore the pillow from his friend's grasp.
"Well, I won't allow that. I'm giving you fifteen minutes before I come in with a bucket of cold water. You will get dressed, clean up and meet me. We are going to have a talk."
Gilbert groaned, "Why can't I just stay in here. It's better that way. I won't be a burden or ruin anything."

Ruin anything, huh, Ronald thought, now we're getting somewhere.
He pulled Gilbert to his feet, "Fifteen minutes." He repeated. Gilbert sighed in resignation, he wouldn't be winning this battle.

"Ten, nine, eight, seven," Ronald counted down, on the other side of the door, "six, five, four, thr-". Before he could get to one, Gilbert opened the door. He silently followed his friend outside and sat down next to him on a bench far away from everybody else, giving them some privacy from the others. Ronald presented him with a bag containing a bread and butter sandwich,
"This was what I managed to cobble together," he said in a light tone, "I hope it's okay."
Gilbert took the bag from Ronald but didn't open it, "Thank you." He said automatically, "I'll eat it later."
He snorted, "Oh, no you will not! You will eat at least half of it, right here, right now."
Gilbert rolled his eyes, "Okay, fine then." He pulled out the sandwich and tore off a piece of the bread and reluctantly nibbled on it. Ronald turned to fully face Gilbert,
"Now, tell me, what is wrong? And do not say nothing because I can see plain as day that is not nothing."
"Why should you care?" Gilbert said, sounding ruder than he had intended, "What I mean to say is, it is my problem to deal with." He added. Ronald scrutinised his friend.
"Is it to do with a particular girl with red hair and whose name begins with an A by any chance."
Gilbert just looked away. Aha! Ronald thought, "What happened between the two of you? You used to be so close."
Gilbert sighed, "I ruined everything between us. We can never be friends again." He said mournfully. Ronald pressed him further,
"Well? What happened? Was it the night before last?"
Gilbert was silent for a while before he finally spoke, barely above a whisper, "I-I proposed to her. She told me that she could never love me." He put his head in his hands "I can't believe I did something so stupid."
Ronald was taken aback. Anne turned down a proposal from Gilbert? He was so confused, he thought that they did have an agreement between them. Everyone did.

Gilbert continued, "I know what you're going to tell me. You're going to say that I shouldn't carry on like this, that I should move on, give her up." He looked up at Ronald, "I've loved her for as long as I can remember, since we were kids. I can't have her but I can't give her up. Until I can do that, no one will stand a chance."

Ronald opened his mouth to say something but Gilbert interrupted, "It's not her fault, I was blind and delusional." Ronald didn't know what to say, he had never realised that Gilbert was in so deep. Anne had really cut Gilbert up and it hurt him to see his friend in such a state. He didn't know what to say so he simply said, "Can you keep eating your sandwich." He was about to joke and say, "I've put a lot of love into making it" but he knew that it wasn't the right thing to say and was absolutely not the right time. Suddenly, Gilbert caught sight of a very particular shade of red hair in the corner of his eye. He stood up and made brief eye contact with Anne. Unsure of how he would react if he stayed any longer, Gilbert decided to remove himself from the scene as seeing her only made the dreadful night come rushing back in such vivid detail, he felt as if his heart were about to break into a million fragments. Ronald rushed to his feet as Gilbert quickly walked away,
"Hold up Blythe! Where are you going"

Anne was walking back to Patty's Place following her British literature lecture. Daydreaming about one day meeting her Fitzwilliam Darcy when she caught sight of the two boys quietly talking to each other. She couldn't help herself, she just had to know what they were talking about. Phil is such a bad influence on me!

But before she could even try to eavesdrop, Gilbert had gotten to his feet. Making only the briefest on glances, he then turned away and walked from her. His friend was oblivious to her and chased after Gilbert. He hadn't even acknowledged her! She turned her nose up, "How rude!" she exclaimed to herself.

"Gilbert! Why did you run off like that?" Ronald asked when he had caught up to him.
"I saw her." Gilbert said miserably, "I'm going back to my room. I was better there, I'm better off alone." He knew he was going to fall apart and he'd prefer that the rest of the world wasn't there to see it.

Ronald groaned as he watched Gilbert walk back, "Back to square one again I suppose." He muttered as he followed the heartbroken Gilbert.

Finally back in the safety of his room, he locked the door behind him. He needed to be alone with his thoughts. He recalled someone once told him that they found that writing down things was a good way to express them if you didn't want to talk. He decided to give that a try. He sat down at his desk and began to write;

Anne,
I don't think that I can commence a letter like this by saying 'dear' now. Thank you for finally teaching me that some things are better off unsaid, it's easier to lie. Seeing you today made me realise that it is going to be a very long while until I can talk to you. When we finally became friends, I felt as if I were the happiest boy in the world. We came to Redmond as chums, but now I've discovered that it will be easier for the both of us to leave as strangers
People will say that what was said are only words and that things will get easier with time. You and I both know that nothing is only words, and that is how hearts get hurt. It has been three days and in every silence, I can't stop hearing what you said to me in the orchard. I would give anything to be that tall, dark, mysterious and handsome hero who would whisk you off your feet to marry and live with him in a castle in Spain. I remember you told me that once. That you imagined yourself living in a great big castle. However, the truth is that I am just an ordinary man, just getting by and doing the best I can. To be honest, that has become a Herculean task.

Since you abandoned me, my whole world has crashed around me. I don't really know what to do with the time that I used to fill with spending it with you. I feel like a fool now, because I have just remembered that it was you who gave me the advice about writing things if they can't be said. It's funny how time goes rushing by, and all the little things we've left behind as we've grown up. It would appear our friendship has now been added to the list. I said that I loved you and you said goodbye, isn't it strange to think how much can change in just the blink of an eye. There won't be a single day that will go by where I won't wish for you, I can promise you that.

Everywhere I look I see you. My heart is aching and even though I have read it in books, I've seen it plays and shows, I still don't know a way to manage the pain.
Knowing you, you would think it rather romantic to have a broken heart from a scorned lover. After all, I remember you being particularly sympathetic towards Mr. Darcy but there is no romance in it whatsoever. Thanks to you, I have now realised that in life, there is no love, no hope, no glory and especially no happy ending. The sooner you know that, the better. As Shakespeare once wrote, "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women are merely players. Well, I'm playing the part of a lonely heart.
Our lives are in the hands of a bitter, bitter man and now I've had to say goodbye to the world that I thought I lived in. When I told you that I loved you, I had honestly believed that you had felt the same way too. You've taken all of who I used to be away from me.

Please tell me how to breathe because losing you is choking me. You took the light and left me in the dark, you left me with a broken heart. Now I'm on my own. I used to believe that you were the one for me, well, at least for the man that I used to be. You taught me to see the bitter truth about me and you. You know, last night, I managed to get a couple of hours' sleep. I had a dream that I was watching two kids playing in Avonlea. They were children we once knew. Anyway, they were walking around and talking together, laughing, without a care in the world. I saw light inside their eyes. But then there came arguing, slamming doors and closing windows, shutting each other out. They went their separate ways and I felt my heart die. The children were us Anne, they were you and me. Do you think that they're still out there, within us? I wish I could go back to the start, that I were able to travel back in time, back to that night. I was hoping that I could make my dreams last, but it was useless because they come so slow yet go so fast. I knew that I loved you but only did I realise how much until I had to let you go. It seems that we'll have to go back to the way that we were.
Before we were us, and before I was me. I'll have to go back to the way that I was before I was happier than I had ever been. It would seem that we've ended things as they began, but I suppose that's the way it has to be. How far away those jubilant nights we once knew feel. I can only blame myself. Hopefully everything that has happened between us will soon be erased, and then without you, I can try to move on. Well, at least try to learn to live again. It's been only a few days since we were friends and I would give anything to sit on a bench with you, even for just five minutes, with it being tense or awkward. Just five minutes to watch the sunset, to watch strangers go by, to hear your laugh, to talk about the old times. But you're not here with me, and I doubt you will ever be again. Those days have forever gone away. I miss you, but I promise that I won't say a word. I know that it will just make you uneasy.

Gilbert stopped writing, he had nothing more to say for the moment. His hand was shaking had tears were welling up in his eyes, making it hard for him to write. Writing letters to Anne would be a good way to let out his feelings. He never understood keeping journals, writing to a book as if they were a real person. At least with this, he could imagine Anne reading the letters. He daren't send it, but all the same. Tonight, Gilbert started to feel the emotional exhaustion creeping up on him. Putting away his pens and folding up the letter, he finally noticed some letters from home had been put on his desk. I'll read them tomorrow, he reasoned.

A few months had passed and Gilbert was beginning to build up his life again. It was a painfully slow process but he was learning to live again. He had received a letter from his mother that, even in the darkest of days, which were still many, he would read the letter and try to find comfort in it. On this particular day, it seemed as if things were never going to get better. For the past few days, Gilbert had felt as if there were a grey cloud over him. He knew that the sun was there, but because of the cloud, he could never feel its warmth, experience its light, sometimes he even struggled to see beyond the shadow and fog and rain that the dreaded cloud brought with it. Pulling out the letter from his bedside drawer he searched for the words that often helped him:

… Every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don't always soften the bad things but vice versa the bad things don't always spoil the good things and make them unimportant. I know that it hurts right now, but after some time it won't hurt as badly. You aren't going to believe a word I say but there will come a day when you can say that you're okay and mean it. There's nothing that you can do but try. You're at the bottom right now but you will come back up. I promise you that things will make sense again. Sometimes the route to joy is indirect, our journey home not quite as we expected. There is no magic star to guide our steps, no ancient prophecies to predict our way. The greatest gift is to know that we travel not alone, but in the company of others and I will always be here for you.

Just get through this and you will come out stronger

All my love,
Your Mother