Miracle maker.
Summary: Harm and Mac's baby problems as seen by a third person…
AN: A positive story on the scariest day of the year...
AN II: I don't like them giving up their commission, so let's pretend neither of them had to. For all I care, they're still set in Washington.
Spoilers: None I can think of…
Disclaimer: Still working on a way to kidnap them, but so far…not mine.
Reviews: Please?
My job truly is a double edged sword. There are moments when I love it. When I can tell couples that their attempt of IVF has had a satisfactory result and they're about to start a family. Or when a disease is in fact not as bad as they thought, which means they can opt for a child without my interference. Those times, the tears I witness are happy ones. I love my job.
Then there are days I absolutely hate it. When a medical condition causes fertility problems I can neither resolve or work around. Or when a couple has already exhausted every known possibility and still nothing works. The tears that flow then are those of pain, anger, fatigue, despair and finality as realization sinks in. Those final tears can break me as much as they break those couples.
Some people claim that the men who come in here grief less than their spouses. If you were to count the teardrops, I would have to agree. But when you look beyond the apparently strong or even indifferent surface, you see their pain. Men just think differently, so they hurt differently too. Most men being problem solvers by nature, when they have just accepted the bad outcome of their efforts, they tend to try to think in alternatives (adoption, looking at the bright side of being childless, envisioning living out every other childhood dream now that they don't have to spend time, money and energy on kids). Just to have a reason to move on with life other than procreation.
While at the same time, most women are not ready to think ahead yet, let alone see anything positive about it. Women are usually more fixated on the problem, solutions or sideways being the last thing on their mind Sometimes I have to open all registers in order to keep them from taking it out on each other. Marriages can easily start to fall apart in this little confined space, where hope and despair are so closely related. Can you imagine why there are times I want to turn in my diploma and try a less demanding profession? I can do a mean flower arrangement…
Luckily, as I head in for the day, I don't think it'll be one of the bad ones. In fact, this one will become so wonderful so fast that it'll sustain me for months to come. Today I get to tell some good news.
They came to me a week ago. A female marine Colonel and her Navy Captain husband. A handsome couple, newlyweds with a devotion to each other that never faltered throughout the intake sessions with all the less than comfortable questioning, poking and prodding into their most private lives and body parts. The diagnosis of her condition of endometrioses gave her a less than five percent chance of conceiving a child the natural way. Clearly it shows how looks can deceive; neither one of them looked any less than perfectly healthy when they first stepped into my clinic. Could be the effects of their uniforms though.
So I did all the customary tests on them, laid out their options and alternatives and gave them some time to digest. Today they're back to discuss their decisions. Only now I have a huge surprise for them: it seems they don't have to decide anything; it's been made for them. By their own love in an age-old conspiracy with mother nature herself.
I couldn't believe my own eyes when I got the results from her latest blood test back. Then I grinned. I love my job today.
Here they come in, both composed in a way that probably only years of hard training can accomplish, me holding on to my poker face that only years of experience in my field can accomplish. Once inside with a cup of my strongest coffee (him taking careful sips and wincing, her gulping it down like it's just water), the woman's resolve wavers off ever so little as her fidgeting hands search for his reassuring touch. Calmly the man reaches out to her, stilling the trembling in her fingers if not in her voice.
I decide it's time to clear the air. Bracing myself I tell them the news. Both of them look at me, absolutely dumbfounded, their composure all but faded away. She's shedding some tears, but still adamantly refuses to believe me. I've foreseen that reaction.
With a smile I hand her a very common kind of test and she rushes to the bathroom. Her husband gets up, sits down again and gives me the smallest of apologetic smiles as he clearly doesn't know what to think, if to think at all.
Minutes later her cry rings out. He knocks over the chair in his hurry to get by her side. She comes rushing out and they collide into a solid tear filled hug as both of them stare at the little blue dots indicating that their journey as parents has just begun.
As for me: I find myself crying happy tears with them. And loving my job today…
