From The Shadows
By: Evie

I'm always watching
Always from the shadows
I see how strong you get
And realize soon you will be
as strong as me.

When I first saw you I was disgusted.
How could father allow himself to let you live?
But as you got older
my hate for you left,
and was replaced with respect.
First you were the puppy,
But then you were my koinu.

As I watched you, my mind
goes back to your childhood,
to the parts when we would be together.
I protected you from their glares, their words.
The words they threw at you cut through me
like they did you.

Did you know?
That every time that happened,
when they left and you fell asleep
I would put them out of our misery?
Did you know that I held you,
when you were frightened?
By the smallest things,
thunder and lightning,
but never the humans or demons.

You truly amaze me little brother.
Picking fights you surly will loose.
But then come out on top.
I guess I underestimated you.

I've always wanted to
ask you; did you know?
Did you know it was me?
That I was the one who was
there helping you out?
To step in when you were in over your head?
Could you sense that I was the one
who moved you, when you were beaten?
Did you know I would always be there for you?

I would wait in the shadows
close enough to step in, in time
but far enough to allow you your space.

But one day, the one day
I let you out of my sight
you went to another.

A miko.

My anger rose.
My blood boiled.
Once you started following her
like a love sick puppy
it disgusted me.

I knew I could no longer be there.
She would sense me,
and then you would find me.
I didn't want you to find me,
not until I knew you were ready.

I tried to drive her away.
I spoke to her
telling her to get away from you
and to stop putting stupid ideas
into your head.
She didn't listen, and got you to
agree to turn human.

Human!
The one part of you that
you've always hated.
When you said yes, I lost it.
You would give up our fathers' blood
for this wench!
I couldn't believe it.
I couldn't stand it.
…Or you.

So I left.
Left the shadows
and let you be on your own.
If you didn't want fathers blood.
You didn't want me.

Two days after I left,
you slept.
You were pinned to a tree,
cursed to sleep.
I released a mournful howl.
I should have killed that wench.
I knew there was something wrong
with her, since I first laid eyes on her.
But I did nothing.
And I regret it.

So back to the shadows I went
knowing I couldn't free you.
I chased away all
who came near you.
To laugh.
To stare.
To ridicule.
No one would do that in my presence.
And I was always there.

Every time I chased them away
I would come up to your face
and growl;
"Why am I helping you?"
And I knew right away
why I did.
I did it because I love you.

One day I let you out of my sight-again.
And this strange girl comes
and frees you.
And then you went after this jewel
to make you a full demon.

Funny, before you wanted to be human.

I stopped laughing when that
rosary went around your neck,
and you were to follow her around like a dog.
History was starting to repeat it self.
And I was not about to let that happen.

So,
from out of the shadow
I made my presence known.
You sensed someone new,
someone familiar.
You knew my aura-good.
I would not let you become weak.

I kept you strong so that one day,
when I know you're ready,
I'll fulfill your desire.
And you will rule beside me.
I would not sit and watch you be made into joke.
No.
I left the shadows behind and came
straight to your face.

You're mine.
No one else's.
You will not leave me again.
I promised you and my self
that I would fulfill you desire
to become a full demon.
I will send this new wench away.
No one will interfere.
I always get what I want.
And I want my brother

My Koinu.


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