Title: Twisted Tale

By: Tsuneni2Nocis

Summary: What happens when a muggle matchmaker is sought out by Dumbledore to bring house unity? Insanity, timetravel, closeness...and pissed off characters. Hehehe...let the madness begin! R&R Parings: HG/DM, BZ/GW, RW/PP, HP/LB

Disclaimer: I'll admit it, The Harry Potter characters ARE mine. Yup- I am J.K Rowling. Ha-ha-and then I woke up from this dream and realized I wasn't. So, not mine- Doesn't mean I can't borrow them and use them to preform my evil tricks on them though. Hehehe...this should be fun!

Chapter One:

A lone girl stood at the platform 9 3/4 her dark brown hair billowing around her, framing her oval face. She had Chocolate colored eyes, surrounded by black lashes, her nose was of normal size, lips average; although rosier than others. She wore robes with the Hogwarts crest, although she wasn't sorted yet. She was a little over five feet four inches and she stood looking around. Her name was Deisi Acevedo.

The whistle for the train heading towards Hogwarts blew and she rushed to get inside. Once inside she was greeted by a quarrel between a blond guy and a brunette. The guy stood at about 5'9 he had a muscular body, from what she could see, under robes that had the Slytherin crest on it. She saw he had stormy blue eyes that shone with loathing while looking down at the girl, his hair was platinum blond; a shade she had never seen before on a person. Paled skin and face with a glare he began to talked rather loudly.

"Filthy little muddblood! Get out of my freaking way, can't you see I'm walking here?" He spat out.

Deisi looked at the girl who was on the verge of choking the blond. She was about 5'5 and shorter than him, with messy curls all around her round face. Cinnamon colored eyes flashed at the blond and she wore a Griffindor crest on her robe. Her full lips were now thin and Deisi took a step back; she knew what was to come.

SLAP!

"DON'T YOU EVER CALL ME A MUDDBLOOD, MALFOY! I MIGHT BE A MUGGLE BORN BUT AT LEAST MY PARENTS AREN'T DEATH EATERS!" The girl then ran of towards the other direction, passing Deisi on the way.

Hmmm...this is interesting. I wonder if I could get them to-- Deisi smiled sinisterly as a plan formed in her head. She walked up to the Slytherin and began to talk.

"Hello, I'm Deisi. I'm a seventh year here at Hogwarts, this is my first year here actually." She extended her hand and the boy looked her over. He then began to smile, a cold-chilling smile that had her shaking a bit; though she dared not show it. He took her hand and kiss it.

"Draco Malfoy, at your service. I'm the Head Boy this year...Pureblood Slytherin." Deisi smiled and willed her face to not reveal her delight in knowing that he was Head Boy for this fit in perfectly for her plans.

She smiled seductively at him and leaned closer to him. Hehehe- maybe, just maybe, this year will be fun after all! Let's play with his head shall we... (A/N: Hehehe-I just got it right now! Don't think nasty though...I meant BRAIN! Bleh- I'll just stop now.)

"Slytherin you say? Well, Draco, I've always admired the Slytherins, you know." She then began making circular motions with her finger on his chest. "How they are all so cunning and strong...are you like that, Draco?"

Draco began to turn a deep shade of red, which is rather surprising, if you think about it. Oh, how cute. I made him blush.

Draco began to cough and then smiled at her. "Of course I'm like that, I am the Head Boy after all."

Deisi continued the strocking and moved closer. "Yes, of course. Now, tell me...what did you have to do to become the HEAD of house?" She mumured next t his ear.

Draco started figiting around but soon composed himself, now a bit hot.(A/n: Does anyone remember a time what Draco wasn't so hot? lol. I didn't think so...carry on!) He then began to smirk.

"It's hard to explain...I know where I can show you EXACTLY why I'm the Head boy though...What do you say?"

Deisi smiled and batted her eyelashes at him, his smirk turned into a grin and Deisi began to back away from him.

"I would LOVE that, Draco...but what is your girlfriend going to say? I mean...you just had a lover's quarrel with her, shouldn't you be with HER?"

Draco paled and stepped back as if he just had been kicked on his--leg. "WHAT! ME AND HER! THAT'S HERMIONE GRANGER YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT! NEVER, NEVER, SAY THAT AGAIN! SHE'S MY ENEMY, A MUDDBLOOD, I WOULD NEVER LOWER MYSELF TO SUCH FILTH!"

Ha-ha-that's what YOU think. Deisi smiled and kissed Draco on the cheek. "Alright, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insult you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go conduct a plan so evil it'll make your great-great-great grandfather turn in his grave." Deisi walked away from a dumbfounded Draco and marched on up a head, while he watched her go.

Deisi went in search of Hermione and found her in a compartment with two other guys. One with red, messy hair and light green eyes, almost brown actually. From what she saw he was easily over six feet tall, along with the raven haired guy across from him. He had blue eyes and they both sported a very muscular body; they were both exceptionally good looking.

Right now three pairs of eyes were looking at her. She smiled and stayed in the doorway.

"Umm...hello. I'm Deisi, and new here..." The trio looked at her then at each other. Hermione was the first one to begin speaking.

"Hello, Deisi. I'm Hermione Granger and this here is Harry Potter-" She pointed at the black-haired guy, "and this is Ron Weasley."

"Hullo." They both said in unison.

Deisi was invited to sit down with them and they began to talk. Soon the compartment door opened and a red-headed girl appeared, along with another of brown hair. Hermione introduced them to Deisi, the red-head was Ginny Weasley, Ron's sister, and the brown-haired one was Lavender Brown. They sat with them and Deisi noticed that Lavender kept sending death glares at Harry, while Harry did the same.

Hmmm...interesting, really interesting.

A few minutes passed on by in silence when suddenly the compartment door opened with a bang. Deisi first saw Draco who was with a dark Italian boy who was handsome, and a black-haired girl with short hair.

A smirk was on all their faces. Draco kept his gaze fixed on Hermione, while the Italian focused on Ginny, who looked ready to hex him. The black-haired girl focused on Ron, who looked back with loathing and Harry still looked at Lavender and vise-versa.

"Well, well, well...what do we have here? Potty, weasel, mudblood, the weaselette, and the Griffindor slut." Draco's eyes then focused on Deisi and he scowled. "And what are you doing here...with THIS filth?"

Deisi smiled sinisterly. "THAT is something I am not at liberty to discuss. The question here is really why are YOU here?"

Draco motioned to the people in the compartment.

"It's time for their daily dose of torture, I'm here to supply them with some."

"What!" The Griffindor's shouted.

Deisi ignored them and continued with the conversation.

"You know, I see no point in doing that. Why not just leave and go try to torture someone else? I saw some Hufflepuffs a few minutes ago pass by..."

"Are you trying to PROTECT these Griffindors?" Her asked.

"And what if I am?"

"Deisi, it's either you stick with the Slytherins OR you go with THEM." Draco spat out.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyways, who are your friends?"

Draco raised an eyebrow but answered her question. "Blaise Zabinni and Pansy Parkinson, why?"

"No reason, just curiosity." Deisi looked from the Griffindors to the Slytherins and smiled. "I take it you all loathed one another?"

"YES!" they all cried in unison.

"Slytherins are-"

"Griffindors are-"

"complete-"

"idiots."

"assholes."

Deisi laughed as they all tried to tell bad things about each others houses. You'll all be thinking differently when I'm through will you, just wait.

"Ha-ha-alright. Well, I'm gonna go now...see y'all later!" Deisi got up from her seat and moved the Slytherins so she could go find an empty compartment. Luckily she did find one and dropped her trunk in it.

She took out a notebook and charmed it to be only legible to her eyes.

Today has been a very interesting day, and of course it isn't over yet. I have, of course, conducted a plan to get Slytherin and Griffindor houses together, just like Dumbledore requested of me. I already see the pairs I will be getting together, all I can say is that it won't be easy but nothing is really ever hard for a first-class matchmaker like myself, who knows? Maybe Arrows will give me advice this time...hehe...this'll be one interesting year.

Author's note: Please review!

-Tsuneni2Nocis