Marry Fucking Christmas
Severus didn't know what time it was. Sometime after midnight he supposed, as he walked down the street. He'd left his home nearly twenty minutes ago. He thought about stopping by Lily's … Just once … Asking for her forgiveness … She wouldn't turn him away if she knew he had nowhere else to go. Not tonight. He doubted her parents would let her …. That was the only thing stopping him, really. If Lily didn't want him there, and her parents said yes … She would have no choice but to agree. And he didn't want to do that … He respected her too much for that. He wasn't her problem, nor her parents. His problems were his own.
He passed by her house, glancing up and seeing that her bedroom light was on. Strange, since it was so late. She usually went to bed at eleven. But it was only a quick glance … Out of the corner of his eye really. He didn't even stop to look, just glanced and kept walking. Within a few more minutes he reached the park where he'd met Lily all those years ago. It seemed like a life time ago.
He pulled his jacket around himself tighter, the tips of his fingers numb and he wished he hadn't cut the tips of the fingers off months ago. At least it wasn't snowing. There was a bit of frost on the ground but … Considering it was Christmas Eve he was surprised there wasn't snow on the ground already. At least there was that.
Severus pulled a crushed pack of smokes from his pocket and an old silver zippo lighter, putting a cigarette between his lips and fighting with the lighter to light it. Once he got it lit he tossed the package onto the ground and sat on the cold swing.
He sighed as he let the smoke stream from his lips and looked up at the sky. When did his life become so fucked? What did he do to deserve this? The abuse, the neglect, the bullying …. When did a cold park and a stolen cigarette become the highlight of his life? He rested his head against the chain of the swing, ignoring the bite of metal against his head. He could go home sure but …. He didn't fancy the beating he'd get from his father when the man returned from the bar …. Nor did he care to lay in his room, bleeding, listening to his mother sobbing in the other room.
No, it was better for him out here. The cold and the darkness was quickly becoming his friend. His comfort. He sat in silence, alone, as he finished off his cigarette, flicking the burning butt to the ground, melting the frost beneath it. He moved to the bush where he'd hidden when he was a child, when he'd watched her playing with her sister, and crawled underneath it. He tugged his jacket tighter around him, slipping his hands into the sleeves as he curled up on the cold ground.
"Merry Fucking Christmas Severus." He muttered to himself as he tried to fall asleep.
((A/N – Omg …. I did it …. I wrote an entire one shot story in under a page …. I didn't think I was capable …. But I did it! Anyway – please as always R&R, I might write a sequel, we'll see how much people like this one.))