THE LAST BEAT OF MY HEART
Tomorrow's my birthday. I turn seventeen. I don't feel excited at all, if truth be told. Well, I would have felt a whole lot better if my life was still in one piece. I would have felt happier if Harry wasn't Hermione's boyfriend. It's quite heartbreaking, watching the two of them walking around the whole school, hand in hand. It's even worse when you walk in an empty classroom only to find them kissing passionately. Like I've done. The first girl I ever had feelings for and already my heart's in two. Whoever said that being in love is a great feeling must be a total idiot.
I was sitting all alone in our dormitory. No one as my company … no one except a knife. My supposedly best friend Harry Potter is off somewhere with the most beautiful woman God had ever created. I don't know where they both were and I'm not quite sure that I really want to know. Probably in the library, all alone, without a single worry to disturb their happy hearts. Just thinking about it was painful. Ever since they became more than friends, I was like a nobody to them. Just another red-haired, freckled-face Weasley. I wasn't a friend anymore, I wasn't a chess player, I wasn't anybody.
Suddenly, my eyes darted towards the floor and landed on the knife. What was the point of living if everyday was going to be like this? Pain, loneliness, anger … it was hardly bearable anymore. What was the point of living if your best friends thought you were a nobody? What was the point of living when you have only yourself because your family was murdered? What was the point of living when the only person you ever loved doesn't even notice you?
Bending down, I picked up the knife from the cold stone floor and took a closer look at it. Turning it over and over in my trembling hands, I admired its long, silver-sharp blade. Why live? I asked myself. I searched and searched the back of my mind for an answer – any reason at all. I felt a single tear run down my cheek. I felt desperate. I wanted to have a reason to live. I didn't find one. And so it was decided. Placing the tip of the blade at my chest, I drove it to the centre of my heart.