[A/N] Sort of AU (not entirely sure how Cana's magic works, so just go with it). Laxus hasn't been banished from Fairy Tail, but he hasn't been around for a while.

Cana sat cross-legged on the bar, absentmindedly setting her cards out in front of her, and watched the brawl unfold before her. The only moves she made were to throw out an arm or a blast of magic to keep one of the other mages from destroying the precious vessels of alcohol on the shelves behind her.

Tower

Cana pursed her lips; she hated readings about lightning. They usually meant trouble for the guild—especially if Dreyar was involved.

Reversed Magician

Fuckin' A. Indecision? Cana was of a mind to gather up her tarot cards when Gray came flying at her, propelled by a certain Slayer's Roar. Cana ripped a card from her magic deck—lightning—and Gray bounced off the electric barrier she threw up.

"Away from the booze!" Cana bellowed over the racket.

Mirajane sighed, relieved that everyone knew to fear the drunk when it came to the safety of her beer. "How's the reading, Cana?" she asked, leaning her elbows on the bar.

Cana sucked her teeth. "Dunno. The Tower means lightning or conflict—in this guild, those go hand in hand." Mira giggled. "And here, the Magician is Reversed, meaning indecision or apathy."

"So what does it tell you?"

"I won't know until I draw that last card." Cana pursed her lips, examining the possibilities. She drew the card and turned it over, then groaned.

The Star

"Cana?"

"Healing old wounds," Cana growled. "Shit, Laxus is coming home!"

A dark look passed over Mirajane's lovely features. "Why?"

Cana gestured at the cards. "You tell me. Your guess is as good as mine."

Thanks to the careful policing of Erza and Master Makarov, the brawl settled down, and the various groups of friends returned to their tables for food and drink. Cana shook her head. "Master?" she called.

The small Wizard Saint turned and approached. "Yes, my dear?"

"Have you heard anything from Laxus lately?"

He scrutinized her. "Why do you ask, Cana?"

Cana gestured at the reading in front of her. "Can you read it, Master?"

"I can. How can you be sure it means Laxus, though?"

Cana tapped her head. "Part of my magic. I just know which meaning it's focusing on."

The Master stroked his chin. "Last I heard, Laxus was in the north."

"Well, count the days, cause he'll be coming back, although for what, I can't be sure." Cana gathered up her cards.

"Inverted Magician and the Star," Makarov muttered. He looked up. "Thank you, Cana. I appreciate the heads up."

Cana nodded. "Hey, Mira?"

"Another round, Cana?"

"Hit me. Strongest you got."

The long, dark coat rippled in the breeze. Music blared into his ears, a heavy beat thrumming with power. The cord to his headphones crackled with electricity—not necessary, but he was never the modest sort. Always needed a chance to show off his mastery of his power.

So Freed was styling himself leader of a so-called "Thunder God Tribe", eh? Good for him. Not that any of them had thunder magic. That was Laxus' thing. Nice of them to honor him, though. Fitting.

Laxus was going to love the look on Gramps' face. Salamander and Redfox were going to quake in their boots—he hoped they hadn't forgotten the lesson he taught them.

He threw open the doors to the guild. "I'm ho-ome!" he shouted thunderously.

The guild fell silent, stiffening in shock. As he sauntered up to the bar, he scanned the faces of the pathetic wizards making up the guild. Salamander and Redfox looked furious, Blondie looked afraid (good, good), the short blue-haired girl and her team looked nervous…

His eyes went to the bar. "Tch." Cana swirled her drink, decidedly disinterested in his appearance. Nothing in her face of body language gave away surprise or care that he had returned. Neither Mirajane nor Gramps looked surprised, either. Fortune-telling bitch.

He passed Cana and muttered, "Can't use your cards on the test."

"Fuckin' prick," she murmured back, leaning back on one hand and sipping her scotch. Over the rim of the glass, her dark, catlike eyes dared him to say something else.

Let's just get one thing straight, Laxus chose not to say anything.

She snorted as he passed, climbing up to stairs to where Gramps stood on the balcony. Laxus bristled but again, chose not to react. As he went, conversation picked up grudgingly, and he was no doubt the topic of all of them.

He glanced at the bartender and the alcoholic. Cana was ordering another drink. Tch. Fine, all conversations but one. He looked back at his grandfather. "'Sup, Gramps?"

"Laxus," Makarov nodded gruffly. "What brings you home?"

Laxus shrugged. "Northern Fiore is boring as shit."

Makarov raised an eyebrow. "Is that so? Not enough havoc to be caused with Quatro Cerberus or Lamia Scale?"

"Nah."

"Well, it's good to have you back," Makarov admitted grudgingly. "I've missed you, boy."

Of course he did. That was Gramps' biggest weakness; his soft spot for family.

Even the brats claiming wizardship that Gramps fostered at Fairy Tail.

"Anything special happen?" Laxus asked vaguely, scanning the guild.

As Gramps regaled him with a few tales of the other members, Laxus focused his Slayer's hearing on various conversations around the guild.

"Can you believe—"

"The nerve o' this guy—"

"I swear, this time I'll kick his—"

Laxus zoned them all out. Nothing new. Blondie got up from her table to get a drink from Mirajane.

Tch. Laxus watched as most of the men in the guild turned their gaze to the bar, where three of the hottest women in Fairy Tail sat.

Stepping in with the streaker, the water mage from Phantom glanced up at Laxus. Fear flashed across her face as he leered crookedly at her. She hurried to catch up with Fullbuster and the Salamander.

"…axus? Laxus! Are you even listening to me?"

"Nope," he drawled, crossing his arms. He turned up the volume in his Sound Pods.

Being the center of attention (most attention, shut up) felt great.