Summary: What really happened to Sirius after he died? Read and find out.
Hello everyone. Another humor fic. Enjoy. Oh, and this is planned to be one-shot, but I'll see how the reviews go.
Hello everyone. My name is Sirius Black. I don't really see what the whole deal is with me dying. I mean, it's not like I was really wiped off the map. Alright, I miss the chicken wings Hogwarts is famous for, but one has to make sacrifices.
"YOU THERE!!!!! DISGRACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I turn around in the middle of, essentially, nowhere, to see my dear old Mum pointing a shaking finger at me. Again. Unfortunately, I had the lucky chance of meeting her first and been tagging around her because I didn't know the way around. The only problem was that she still remembered me.
"UNFIT TO BE ALIVE!!!"
I roll my eyes, wondering whether I should tell her that I am technically dead and that is why I am here. I was spared from the dilemma, however, as I come face to face with a man who was younger then me by birth, and his dim-witted mind proved it.
"Ha, Ha, Sirius I see you're dead!" he smiled broadly.
"Oh, and what does that make you, alive?" I asked, rising an eyebrow in his direction as he laughs and walks up to our mother, who had begun screeching in the background.
"REGULUS!!!! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HELP ME FIND A LINE OF ATTACK OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Line of attack, huh? I wonder what that means. Deciding not to ponder on how my crazy mother thinks, I walk on, hoping to find my old friend, James Potter.
Instead, I end up face to face with Barty Crouch, a person that had been on my hit list for quite some time. Well, that was, until he died.
"You there! Crazy criminal!"
I stop and point my finger at him as well. "You there! Voldemort supporter!"
He quickly shut up and left me alone after that. Heh... Some people never learn...
A few more paces down the road and some old man bumps into me and stumbles. Me, being a helpful dead guy, helps him up.
"Thank you boy. You know, there are a lot of crazy people out in the world. Like that Sirius Black guy I saw on television right before I died.... Wonder where that bastard is now, killing poor innocent children..."
"Yeah... sure," I mutter, backing away from this man as fast as possible. "Pretty nasty guy..."
And the though suddenly occurs to me that this place, death, was a much odder place then I had originally imagined.
Short, but feedback is required. I would also, if it not too much trouble for the readers, like a list of all the people in the five books that have died. It would make this fic a bit more interesting.
