Its all Greek to me!

by Edwards Best Mate

This story is based after Breaking Dawn. The Cullens are going on holiday, but they dont know where... Jacob is in the story as well. Emmett and Rosalie have a series of evil plans to get rid of Jacob.

1. Going to wherever it is we are going

Edward's POV

As we got on the plane at Seattle Airport, Emmett dropped his bag of the side of the boarding stairs. He tried to grab it, missed, and fell of the steps onto the runway below. He got up to laughter from the rest of us, dusted himself down and jumped up to the exact step he had been on before.

"Oh, Emmett, you really are clumsy" Rosalie sighed. "Vampires aren't supposed to be clumsy."

"I have an idea," said Bella. "Lets castrate Emmett!"

"Or," I added, "We could cut his head off with a chainsaw"

"Yay! I wanna shred Emmett's head too!" Jasper added. Emmett started sulking in his chair.

I sat down in a chair next to Bella, who had Renesmee on her lap. The doors closed, and the plane took off.

"Where going?" asked Renesmee.

"I'm not sure" answered Bella.

"I know," Laughed Alice. "I see a place with lots of sun, and sea, and sand, and more sun, and shopping! Lots and lots and lots of shopping. And Jasper, you have to come with me."

"Oh NO!!" Groaned Jasper. "Do I have to?"

"Yes, you do." Answered Alice. "Or I'll crush your Beyonce CD."

"NO, not my Beyonce CD!!!!"

"Oh, shut up, you two." I said.

"Your coming as well now, Edward, or I'll drive your Volvo into the sea." Alice shot back.

"Alice, you weren't supposed to tell them we were taking the cars to…" Carlisle said before Esme interrupted him

"DON'T TELL THEM WHERE WE ARE GOING!!!"

Jacobs POV

I was really enjoying my holiday in Portugal, but unfortunately it was almost over. I was heading to the airport in a taxi when a disgusting smell caught my attention. Vampires. I didn't recognise the smell, so when I got to the airport I located the plane where the vampires where, and climbed up the luggage ramp into the luggage compartment. I found a suitcase, and climbed into it, not realising that it was pink and flowery until it was too late. I knew I had seen this suitcase before, but I wasn't sure where…

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Most of the jokes are based on a story written by twilightismylife13579 that is not yet published. it will be called Cullen Confessions, and yes, i do have permission to use these jokes.