My name is Goldenflower, and everything is my fault.
If it were not for me, everything could have been different. My son and daughter suffered because of me. My daughter left her Clan because of me. Their Clanmates looked down on them because of their father, Tigerstar, but really they looked down upon them because of me.
Tigerstar is not their father. Only two cats know of this truth. Now three. Those three cats are you, me, and Longtail.
Longtail:
The father of Bramblestar and Tawnypelt.
My true love:
Longtail.
Tigerclaw thought he was the father of my kits. He watched them with a soft glow of pride in his eyes. Longtail watched them from afar. He loved them more than Tigerclaw did. They were his kits after all.
I wish I could have revealed their true heritage. Longtail was in fact the father of the litter- not Tigerclaw.
If the truth had surfaced, Tigerclaw would have been furious. He'd flay Longtail and possibly hurt me and my kits. That's why we never told anybody. I never corrected TigerClaw. He was always the father of my kits.
Tigerclaw was the father of Bramblekit and Tawnykit. Except that he was not.
One time Fireheart had glanced over at Bramblekit. A shudder ran down his spine at the resemblance between him and Tigerclaw. I snarled at the young warrior saying that Bramblekit may look like him, but he had a different kind of heart.
That's not what I wanted to say. I wanted to tell him that Tigerclaw was not his father. Longtail was. The heart Bramblestar has comes from his father Longtail.
But not everyone saw Longtail's true side until he went blind.
I always saw the brave, kind, and wise side of the young warrior while everyone else saw an arrogant, cocky, brash tom.
I don't blame them one bit. He acted tough on the outside, but on the inside he was as soft as a bunny.
Maybe you don't believe me when I say that Tigerstar is not the father of my kits. If you think about it, they actually do bear resemblance to their true father. Bramblestar only looks like Tigerstar by coincidence.
Let's start with their pelts. Bramblestar is a dark brown tabby. True, Tigerstar is a tabby as well, but Longtail and I have tabby-stripe pelts as well. He gets his dark brown fur from the combination of amber-gold and gray. Tawnypelt, being the tortoiseshell that she is not (she is actually tawny), has her tan fur because it is really just a pale gold-gray she got from me and Longtail.
Now their eyes. I know, I know. I have yellow eyes, Longtail has blue eyes, Tawnypelt has green eyes, and Bramblestar has amber eyes. Completely explainable! Tawnypelt is similar to my brother Lionheart that way. They both have shiny green eyes. Bramblestar gets his amber eyes from my mother Speckletail. Ta-da! As for Swiftpaw, he was my first son born to me and Patchpelt, and he was the spitting image of the black-and-white tom.
As for the next litter, Bramblestar and Tawnypelt were the kits brought into the Clans by me and Longtail. Not Tigerstar.
Sometimes I lie in the sunlight and think about how things could have been different...
Tawnykit and Bramblekit wouldn't have had strange glances cast upon them by their Clanmates. They would have grown up without feeling judged and different.
Darkstripe never would have taken them from camp to show off to Tigerstar in ShadowClan. Sorrelkit wouldn't have been poisoned. Thank StarClan she didn't die!
Tawnypaw would have never left ThunderClan.
Bramblepaw might not have had Firestar as a mentor because he wouldn't have needed to prove where his loyalties lie.
Tigerstar would have kept Sasha as his mate. Hawkfrost would have been ShadowClan born and he never would have turned out as bad. Maybe Mothwing would believe in StarClan. Maybe BloodClan would never been brought to the forest. Whitestorm could have lived out his last good moons as deputy.
The prophecy of the four young Clan cats that would lead the Clans to the lake would have been given to some cats else. Perhaps Leafpaw, Whitepaw, or Sorreltail would have represented ThunderClan and Smokepaw or Rowanclaw would have left for ShadowClan.
Squirrelflight might have never fallen in love with Brambleclaw.
Maybe Leafpool never would have fallen in love with Crowfeather because Feathertail might have lived because Smokepaw and Whitepaw could have easily been the pale, silver cat in the Tribe's prophecy.
ThunderClan's Power of Three would have never been born.
Ashfur would still be alive.
Thornclaw mignt have been deputy one day.
Graystripe would have never been caught by Twolegs. He would have never met Millie. His three kits would never have been born. Briarlight would have never suffered because she wouldn't exist.
Tigerheart wouldn't have been named after Tigerstar because he was never related to him. Flametail wouldn't have drowned and Dawnpelt never would have accused Jayfeaher of murder because all four cats never would have been born.
There would be no portal to the Ancients.
Jay's Wing would never been able to cause the Ancients to move to the forest.
The Tribe, the Clans, and even StarClan would have never existed.
But they do.
And I'm thankful.
Longtail and I suffered with our secret, but perhaps we never would have existed because the truth altered the past, present, and the future. Sometimes suffering alone can benefit the good of many others.
Now, please turn your eyes to gaze upon your Warriors books. How different could we have been if Tigerstar was never Bramblestar's father? The effect is greater than you could have thought.
It was the cruel circle of fate that created the Clans. The land of beyond StarClan created our world as a snake- a snake that swallows its own tail. Destiny made a choice. Longtail and I are destiny's servants as everyone in the world is.
My name is Goldenflower, and everything is my fault.
I can't take credit for the creation of our world, but I could have destroyed it with a single meow.
