A/N: Well, Imma just leave this here and see what you guys think. Don't ask me where this thing came from…I…I'm not sure.
In any case, all I'll say is it contains some pretty strong material. Nothing graphic, but it does allude to some serious stuff. I hate warnings because they ruin surprises, and I want people to come to this with no idea of what will happen. So… If you read it and suddenly come across something that makes you go ewww, or no, no, no, no… then just hit the back button.
If there's anyone left at the end, please feel free to drop me a hello and tell me what you think.
For those of you that follow me on AO3 and Dreamwidth, there will be a bonus chapter up very shortly (After I've finished writing it!) including some very naughty bits and pieces that I left out of this story.
Also, I did have this all beautifully formatted and set out, then stupid went and fooked it up for me. God, I hate this site sometimes! So, if the endless spacing and short paragraphs do your head in like they do mine, I'm sorry. I really am.
Disclaimer: All characters, places and names belong to Square Enix and/or Disney. No infringement intended, no profit made.
Twenty Four Hours
Leon sat in the quiet dark of the hospital room, his silent vigil undisturbed. There were the sounds of a hospital ward around him. The clichéd beeping of heart monitors and clatter from bustling nurses. The odd rattle of an air vent kicked in every fifteen minutes, recycling the air in and out of the ICU, and the ring of the phone went off occasionally. But it was quiet in their room. The lights were dimmed and the blinds had been drawn and all of the sounds were muted behind glass and wood. Leon sat in the plastic chair; elbows on knees, hands clasped loosely together, head bent low. His silhouette was outlined by the faint light peeking in from behind the blinds that were drawn across the observation window and there was only a weak, insipid light coming from the over head lamp above the bed.
Leon listened to himself breathing. He kept his breaths slow and deep, counting the seconds in between each one to make sure they were nice and even. He had been doing this for the past half an hour - a task to keep himself calm. It was working for the most part. His clean white shirt was open at the neck, his tie stuffed into his trouser suit pocket, his top button undone. It was too hot in the side-room for his suit jacket, so he had hung it off the back of his chair. He opened his eyes and looked down at his polished, gleaming dress shoes, black laces neatly tied. Apart from his uncharacteristically rumpled shirt and missing tie, he was immaculate. Not a sign or a clue about him told of his frightening and harrowing ordeal.
Leon looked up through his chocolaty, choppy bangs; blue-grey eyes soft with concern and weariness and he let out a deep sigh. He sat back in the blue plastic chair, unforgiving on his worn out, aching body. If he was going to stay the night (and he most definitely was) then he needed a better chair he thought to himself.
He stretched his long legs out before him, slightly arching his back and pushing his feet under the bed, the back of the chair flexing and giving slightly against his weight. Leon looked up at the clock that was quietly ticking away on the right hand side wall. Half past two in the morning.
He ran a hand raggedly down his face, feeling the beginnings of stubble emerging on his chin and then pinched the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut against the tiredness that made them sting and itch. He felt a yawn coming on, but he fought it and supressed it.
In the bed directly opposite him, Cloud stirred.
Leon sat forward in his chair, immediately alert and attentive, he reached out and took the young man's lax fingers in hand and gave them a small squeeze, Leon's eyes never leaving Cloud's battered and bruised face.
Cloud stirred again, making soft sounds in the back of his throat, muffled by the oxygen mask over his face. Leon felt the fingers under his touch give a little flinch and instinctively they tried to curl round Leon's warm and reassuring grip. Leon let his thumb ghost over the back of Cloud's hand, just below where the cannula entered the vein, letting his soothing strokes just over the knuckles tell Cloud that he was with him.
Another set of soft moans escaped the young blond. Leon could see his Adams apple moving as he swallowed again and again, trying to clear his throat and eventually, Cloud's eyelids began to flutter. Leon leaned closer, sitting right to the edge of his seat, balancing his elbows on the edge of the bed. His right hand still soothed Cloud's twitching fingers and with his left, Leon reached up to brush away the blond bangs from the younger man's face; making sure to trace the ridge of his eye and cheek gently with the pad of his thumb. Leon was cautious to avoid the contusion on Cloud's temple and the split eyebrow, but he wouldn't let it stop him. He softly shushed the young man, brushing back more errant strands of honey blond hair made greasy and matted by days of neglect.
Eventually, Cloud opened his eyes, his lids fluttering and flicking open and shut a few times, no doubt even the pallid light of the room a stark contrast to the darkness of his unconsciousness.
Leon felt the fingers curled around his own hand tighten, the grip conveying what Cloud could not say. He was scared.
"It's alright, Cloud." Leon whispered, keeping his voice low but steady and gentle.
Cloud turned his head at the sound, his eyes hazy and blurred; Leon knew his vision would be unseeing. "It's me. It's Leon." He told him, running a hand gently over Cloud's forehead.
Cloud's eyes slid shut again, his brows crinkling in confusion. He let out a groan that should have been a question but Leon had no hope of ever guessing what it was.
"It's okay. You're safe." Leon told him, wanting him to know straight off that he was out of danger. "You're in hospital. You're safe" he repeated still running the tip of his thumb over troubled brows and Cloud squeezed his eyes shut.
When the younger man opened them again they seemed to focus better and Leon smiled softly, his own brows crinkling slightly as his heart twisted uncomfortably in his chest. He had never seen anyone look so lost as he saw Cloud right in that moment. He hated it.
"Hey" Leon offered pathetically. "Can you hear me?" He asked; trying to gauge how much Cloud was taking in right at that moment.
A small squeeze of his hand and an almost imperceptible nod of his head was enough of an answer for Leon.
"It's okay, don't fight it." He reassured, taking Cloud's other hand into his when the young man tried to pull his oxygen mask off. His movements were sluggish and wayward, nearly hitting himself in the face as his drug addled mind misjudged the distance. Leon's fingers closed around Cloud's hand, catching the pulse oximter probe and making the observation machine begin to alarm. He rested Cloud's hands on top of the young man's chest, calming him with more shushes and a gently reassuring squeeze.
"Everything's alright Cloud. Go back to sleep. I'll be here with you, I promise." Leon had no intentions of leaving.
Cloud had ceased his powerless struggle to remove his mask and opened his eyes, his swimming vision settling on the brunette beside his bed. "I'll stay with you all night. I won't leave." Leon added going back to gently patting Cloud's hair. It seemed to calm him.
Cloud closed his eyes again, a small nod of the head telling Leon he understood.
Leon watched as Cloud fell asleep again, his breathing evening out, his chest rising and falling rhythmically.
Leon re-attached the oximter probe to Cloud's finger, the monitor's beeping silenced once it picked up the blonde's pulse and oxygen levels once again.
Despite the situation and despite Cloud's obvious injuries, Leon was relieved. The nagging worry in the pit of his stomach had lessened to a slow churning and the tension in his shoulders abated slightly. The doctors had told him Cloud would be alright and the nurses that came and checked his observations reassured him that the doctors where telling the truth.
Now he had seen it, now Cloud had woken and proven himself okay, Leon felt a little better.
He hadn't wanted to believe that the young man wouldn't be. Truth be told, Leon reckoned it would have been his worst nightmare had things gone the other way. Had Cloud succumbed to unconsciousness and never woken, had he lost the battle to his numerous injuries, then Leon had no idea what he would be doing - falling apart probably.
He had no right to, of course. Who was Cloud Strife to him? Not his boyfriend for certain. He wasn't even a lover, not really; he was barely even a friend. But Leon could no longer deny the immense importance that Cloud represented in his life.
How had it happened? How had he fallen so quickly and so suddenly in love with this impossible to love man?
As he watched Cloud slip back in to the comfortable blackness of sleep, Leon sat back in his uncomfortable chair and ran a hand through his messy dark hair. He let out another sigh, this one light and wistful, yet troubled and deep.
His life had taken a complicated and unexpected turn. It had happened in just less than three months and it was completely and unequivocally his entire fault.
Leon wasn't someone who generally had a huge amount of time for anyone. Out of design or circumstance, he hadn't really paid much attention to the wither-to's and the why-fors. That's just how his life was and always had been. He was a loner. Not anti-social just unsocial. His work took up most of his time. There had been no time for romance. No time for friends or family, not since his mother died. His father was just as busy as he was.
For the longest time, Leon had thought he was abnormal. He had been so long without the slightest inkling for human contact that he thought himself incapable of the feeling. He hadn't realised that the aching dullness in the centre of his chest was the screaming absence of this exact need. The void had been there for so long, Leon had just assumed it was normal. Everyone went around with emptiness inside of them, didn't they?
How strange and unlike him it was then, to find himself driving down one of the more questionable neighbourhoods in Hollow Bastion, his lights dimmed low, looking for something that he had no name for. What was he doing here?
He was tired, he told himself. His head had been swimming; he just needed a short ride to quiet his mind so that he could sleep. So why had he stopped? Why had he wound his window down and why had accepted the offer of a perfect stranger?
Had he known at that time that the stranger was a pro? Leon wanted to kid himself, no. His inner critic gave a smug and haughty guff.
They had driven in silence all the way back to Leon's apartment. A tense and awkward silence filled with the young man's finger tapping and Leon's taciturn frown.
"What's your name?" Leon had asked, thinking maybe this might be like the films and the young blond would answer "whatever you want it to be."
But Cloud would never be that cliché. Not then and not now. He had answered simply and directly, never breaking the rhythm of his fingers as they tapped his knees.
"Cloud. What's yours?" He had turned his head, bright blue eyes alighting on the dark driver of the silver Mercedes.
Leon had considered this. He knew he would not give his real name. He never used his real name. It came with too many attachments and questions. Trouble was, would this Cloud recognise his nickname?
"Leon." He replied shortly, his long fingers gripping the leather of the steering wheel tighter, making it squeak.
"You're not gonna lock me in your basement and chop me up into little pieces, are you Leon?" The small, coy smile on Cloud's lips belied the serious tone of his question. It was meant to sound like a ridiculous notion but it occurred to Leon how likely this could have been. Cloud didn't know him from Adam. Leon obviously wasn't an axe wielding murderer with a perchance for hookers, but Cloud couldn't know that.
"Not today." He had replied, trying to relax and not seem like a brooding, maniacal sociopath. He had never been much good at acting.
It had begun to rain by the time they reached Leon's modest but impressive apartment. The raindrops glowed a murky tangerine in the light of the street lamps; the inky blackness of the cloudy sky an irony not lost on Leon.
Cloud had whistled as they walked in through the front door, Leon flipping on the lights as they passed. He had watched the young man look about himself, turning on his heels around and around as he took in Leon's open plan home, hands in his hoodie, eyebrows raised at the impressive decor. "Nice!"
Leon had a horror filled, gut dropping, skin chilling moment of anxiety in that instant. What was he doing? He had a hooker in his living room! What, exactly, was he planning on doing with him? How the fuck had this happened?
"Are you alright?" Cloud had asked him.
What a ridiculous question. Leon must have looked pale because Cloud mentioned it.
"Are you sure you don't have a basement?" Cloud had laughed again, only slightly joking this time. Leon could tell.
"I'm sorry, it's just..." Leon found he had no idea what to say.
"You don't do this very often?"
"Ever."
"Never?"
Leon shook his head, deciding he should at least take his jacket off, maybe offer his guest a drink? Act normal!
"First time for everything, I guess." Cloud philosophised as he followed Leon up the short flight of stairs to the kitchen that overlooked the living area. "You have fucked a guy before though, right? I mean, this isn't your first time with that?" Cloud had asked so nonchalantly, Leon had almost dropped the wine glasses. He recovered himself enough despite Cloud's best efforts.
"Don't worry, I've done that...I mean, I'm not..." Leon had blushed quite uncontrollably. Most unlike him, and Cloud had chuckled; the sound of it quite pleasant and not as humiliating as Leon figured it should have been. He busied himself opening the bottle of wine as Cloud walked around the kitchen, idling to the window and looked out over the rain soaked city. It gave Leon the chance to observe the young man covertly. He was short, shorter than Leon in any case and he was young, Leon guessed maybe twenty one (Cloud would later confirm he was actually twenty three.) Slim hips led to a broad chest and strong, square shoulders with what looked to be just the right amount of muscle on them. Leon liked them lean, but not too skinny. If he wanted a girly figure, he would have been into girls.
Despite Cloud's youthful appearance he was definitely all man. His dark, baritone voice helped. Leon had no idea if he was a blond or a brunette or a red head man, but Cloud's shocking blond spikey hair seemed nice enough to him. It suited the young man who seemed to still possess the innocence of youth, despite his occupation.
Leon moved to stand behind the young man, Cloud turning as he heard the other approach. "Wine?" Leon asked, holding out the glass.
"I don't drink." Cloud had said it in such a way that it made Leon hesitate for a moment. Had there been an edge to his tone? The slight shift of his face told Leon he had missed an emotion there.
"Never?"
"Ever!"
Yes there was something there. Leon, who was nothing if not a gentleman, decided he should probably forgo the wine. A pity, as he could have used the whole bottle at that point. He set the glasses aside and turned back to the young man, fingers wringing in front of him now they had nothing to hold, nothing to do.
"You're nervous?" Cloud had asked whimsically, his light hearted nature back after what ever had been with the wine had passed.
"Like I said, I don't normally do this sort of stuff." Leon shoved his hands into his pockets, sick of feeling like a fidgety lamb being toyed with by an amused lion.
Cloud took a few sultry steps toward him, making Leon back up a few of his own, his butt hitting the side of the island in the centre of the kitchen. The look on Cloud's face slipped from amused to serious in a few heartbeats. He stood in front of Leon, almost nose to nose but for the slight height difference; his breath mingling with the older man's. He placed his hands on the buckle of Leon's belt and stopped, watching Leon swallow thickly.
"How long have we got?" Cloud asked. The furrow of Leon's brow told him the older man didn't quite understand.
"How long do you want me here for? I go for the hour."
Leon's throat had closed up so completely at these words that it took him a few moments to get his own out. He coughed slightly before stuttering his reply. "I...ummm...all...all night. If...if you want?"
Cloud gave that coy little smile again and Leon's stomach did an uncomfortable little flip-flop.
"Are you asking me or telling me?" He began to undo Leon's trousers, slipping the buckle open and popping the button and slowly, ever so slowly sliding the zipper down.
"Telling you." Leon replied, voice a tight knot in his throat now. "I want you all night."
Cloud's eyes had slid from Leon's to the older man's lips. He was centimetres away. He leaned in a little closer, brushing the side of his nose against Leon's but he didn't kiss him. Not yet. Leon would have to lean in the rest of the way and do that. He was the one in control after all.
That kiss, although bought and paid for, had been something Leon had not expected. Nothing that sensual and intense should ever have been possible. It had been slow and fiery, hot and dizzying. He couldn't remember ever being kissed like that before. He was hard in seconds.
Pulling away, Cloud sank to his knees right there in the kitchen, tugging Leon's jeans down with him as he went. And all of Leon's nerves stood on end; he sucked in a breath and waited.
The sound of the side-room door opening made Leon jump and he sat forward in his chair, turning to see a nurse enter. She carried a ring binder and she gestured towards her patient like she had done the last two times she had been in here. "I've come to check on Mr Strife. May I take his observations?"
Leon nodded his head, forcing the shadows and memories from his mind.
The nurse approached the bed, strapping a cuff to Cloud's arm and fiddling with buttons on the machine. Leon waited patiently, noting how the cuff blew up, and then the machine counted down, the nurse placing her fingers against Cloud's radial pulse and watched her pocket watch. After a full minute she recorded her findings, waiting another minute as she counted his respirations.
"One hundred and twenty three over sixty eight." She confirmed to herself, writing it all down on her chart.
"Is that good?" Leon asked, leaning forward again.
"Good? It's better than mine!" The nurse replied, clicking her pen and putting it away in her top pocket. "All his vitals are good. Strong pulse. Steady temp. No sign of sepsis yet. His blood cultures should be back by morning and we'll know for certain by then but I think he'll be okay. He just needs to rest." She flipped the blood pressure cuff off and turned to regard the man in the chair, harrowed face softening at her words.
"He woke up." Leon informed her. "About ten minutes ago. I told him to go back to sleep." He nodded towards the bed and the sleeping patient.
"Well that's even better." The young nurse consoled, putting a comforting hand on Leon's shoulder as she passed. "Would you like me to find you a better chair, maybe some coffee?" She asked, squeezing the shoulder.
Leon merely nodded his head weakly in response, his gaze never leaving the pale, prone figure in the bed. "Thanks" he managed before the nurse shut the door on her way out.
The next time Leon opened his eyes it was morning. He couldn't remember falling asleep but his body ached with the awkwardness of his slumber. The nurse had found a slightly better chair, although, better didn't exactly equate to a king size memory foam mattress. Leon twisted his head, feeling the tightly knotted muscles pop. He threw his blanket off, given to him by the same nurse who must have felt very sorry for him. Leon stretched a little more, looking over to the bed to see Cloud staring back at him, bright blue eyes liquid pools of cerulean amongst the purples and blues and yellows of his beaten face. His large oxygen mask had been replaced by nasal cannulas, hooked over his ears and under his chin which only served to highlight the dry and split lips that Cloud licked nervously.
Cloud was lucid and bright, despite his obvious pain and Leon sat forward quickly to catch his hand and squeeze it, smiling in relief.
"Hey. How long have you been awake?" Leon asked noticing the sun filtering in through the blinds, dust motes dancing on the beams. He looked behind him at the clock on the wall at the foot of the room. It was half past eight.
"'Bout half an hour." Cloud croaked his voice hoarse and gravelly.
Leon reached over to the table next to the bed and poured a glass of water, standing to help Cloud drink it.
The young blond drank quickly and greedily, choking and dribbling some.
"Steady." Leon admonished, swiping at the drips with his fingers.
The coughs caused Cloud to wince sharply, his face contorting with acute pain, bandaged hands gripping his ribs on his left side. The intensity of it took his breath away for a few moments and he was trapped in a vicious cycle of breathlessness and coughing.
Gradually, it subsided and he lay back against his pillows, shaking and tired once again.
"Want me to see if I can get you any pain killers?" Leon asked setting the glass aside.
Cloud shook his head, his hooded, heavy eyes lifting to look at the tall man standing over him so protectively. "No drugs" he managed to croak out.
Leon frowned, remembering well Cloud's aversion to any drug, even a simple pain killer. It had been one of the more curious things about the young man. Leon was no expert, but he had thought that a life on the streets and narcotics went hand in hand. Yet Cloud seemed to be the exception. Leon hadn't realised his reticence would stretch this far though. He was in pain. A lot of it!
"Are you serious? Cloud, you have three broken ribs there. One of them punctured your lung. I think it would be alright if you took something for the pain."
Cloud just merely shook his head, his colour turning a sickly grey even as they talked. "No." He argued weakly.
It could have been the lack of sleep, the worry and the knowledge of exactly what had been done to Cloud, but anger swelled up in Leon at the younger man's stubborn martyrdom. Leon had had to sit and watch over Cloud, knowing, fearing the worst. He wanted to make it better for the blond and instead of letting him, Cloud was refusing him.
"Dammit Cloud you don't have to put up with it you know. If you're in pain, let the nurses give you something for it." He had raised his voice and was trying with all his might not lose the last thread of his temper. Not with Cloud. Not now.
"No!" Came Cloud's stubborn answer, the energy it took to muster the vehemence behind it, clearly taking its toll on the beaten man. He closed his eyes, brows still furrowed in annoyance. "'S not that bad. Just stop fussing, Leon."
Leon didn't think he was fussing, but he couldn't take the pained expression on Cloud's face much longer. Maybe if he slipped out and asked the nurse while Cloud was asleep?
Leon sighed heavily and sat down, taking Cloud's hand in his once again, careful to avoid the cannula and IV line attached to it. The nurse had said it was just normal saline running through it, to help with his dehydration. He had been without water for a long time.
"You need to allow these people to help you, Cloud." Leon said, his decision to go behind Cloud's back slipping away the more he thought about what Cloud had been through. Cloud had had enough control taken from him already. He didn't need Leon doing it as well.
"I just don't want any drugs, okay? I'm not even supposed to be here, Leon. You know I can't afford all this." Cloud swallowed with some difficulty. If he had the energy, Leon thought he might have gotten up and walked out right then and there. Such was Cloud's stubbornness.
"Cloud!" Leon warned darkly, his eyes narrowing. "If you even think about leaving this bed I'll chase you down and break some more of your ribs, you got me?"
Cloud had just enough energy to open his eyes and glare back. "I just want to go home. I don't need to be here." Cloud clearly had no idea just how serious his injuries were.
"I don't believe you sometimes, Cloud. You have three broken ribs, a punctured lung, a fractured wrist, and multiple contusions" Leon's face belied his harsh tone. He couldn't have looked more lost if he tried as he reeled off Cloud's list of extensive injuries. "Dehydration, internal bleeding. A god damned drain sticking out of your chest, not to mention..." he trailed off, his face, his demeanour, his whole body language regretting taking this line of conversation.
"Not to mention what, Leon?" Cloud pushed him. Knowing if he pushed him towards what he thought he was getting at, maybe he could make him uncomfortable enough to leave.
Leon pinched the binge of his nose again, scrubbing his tired face for good measure. "Not to mention what else they did to you." He finally finished. He looked down as his hands, hating that he felt he had no right to feel the way he did about Cloud's condition. He wasn't anything to the enigmatic young man. If anything he was part of the problem. People like him, people who paid for sex with people like Cloud. He thought maybe on the one hand, it might be a touch hypocritical of him to get moralistic. Then again, Leon could never do what these men had done. Not to anyone, under any circumstances.
At the end of the day, he cared about Cloud. He cared an awful lot, whether Cloud wanted him to or not. What those men had done to Cloud made Leon's blood boil. He couldn't get away from that and he was tired of denying his feelings.
"That was nothing." He heard Cloud reply in a small voice.
Leon looked up to see Cloud looking towards the blinds, his gaze far inward, and his eyes dark and jaded. He thought he looked tired before, but it was nothing to the utter exhaustion and bone wearied defeat he saw on the young man's face, the sight such a shocking and ugly counterpoint to the face he had remembered last night. That Cloud, only three months ago had still looked so young. This Cloud... This Cloud had been broken.
"That wasn't nothing, Cloud. How can you say that?" Leon's voice was soft and gentle, careful not to sound like he was accusing him of anything. There were long moments of silence as Cloud's jaw worked and his eyes misted, before they eventually dried up, not one single tear falling as he worked past the lump in his throat.
"It just doesn't, okay? Just drop it." Cloud replied bitterly, his voice shaky. He turned over as best he could, letting out a small puff of agony as he clutched tightly to his bandaged ribs. The conversation was over.
Within minutes, Cloud was asleep again, his soft breathing shallow and even. He had moved his hand out of Leon's reach and the older man sat with his hand still on the bed where Cloud had pulled away from him.
He had no right to feel so cut up about this, he told himself. Who was he to Cloud? Just another trick. He certainly wasn't his keeper. Leon had no right to be in there making demands of him. Still, Leon couldn't bring himself to walk away. He knew he wouldn't, not until Cloud told him to and even then, maybe he still wouldn't.
From where Leon sat beside the bed, Cloud turned away from him, the flimsy hospital gown open, Leon could see the faded scars that lined the young man's back. They criss-crossed and met in raised, puckered white lines and Leon was instantly reminded of the first time he had seen them, his surprise and distress evident. Cloud had not been happy he had drawn such attention to them; his other tricks probably didn't bother to ask him about them.
It had been back on that first night, with the rain and thunder rumbling overhead. Leon and Cloud had fucked and Leon hadn't realised exactly how much he had missed the simple thrill of it. How had he gone so long without it? His last fling had been in college, another blond filling the role of sexual reliever. Seifer had been an arrogant arsehole but for some reason Leon had liked that. They were still friends even now.
With the exhausting relief of pleasure, Leon had rolled off and was catching his breath, pushing sweaty hair from his flushed face. He looked over as Cloud sat up, flinging his legs over the side of the bed, shoulders curved and his back exposed to him. Leon hadn't realised he had let out a soft curse word, his left hand darting out to trace the scars that were glittering with Cloud's perspiration. Cloud turned to look down over his shoulder at the brunette softly scowling at his back. He felt the young man shudder slightly and pull away.
"What happened?" Leon sat up, the covers pooling around his waist. He saw broad shoulders tense ever so slightly and Cloud's head hang just a little bit lower. He reached out again only to have Cloud stand abruptly, more scars visible across his buttocks and the backs of his legs. Cloud had walked away; disappearing into the bathroom to shower and Leon had known he should never bring it up again. After all, he didn't pay Cloud for his life story.
As the weeks had gone on and feelings had shifted, it began to get harder to keep the silent rules becoming more concrete between them. Leon didn't want Cloud to disappear but he wondered how long he could go on just fucking him. He needed more.
"Someone did this to you." It wasn't a question but a statement that Leon had uttered one day. He was stood behind the blond, who was busy cooking in the kitchen; a little ritual they had gotten into after some initial fucking, the rest of the night stretched out before them. Leon had lifted up the hem of Cloud's t-shirt and traced a thin ribbon of scar tissue down his back. He had felt Cloud tense once again, putting the spatula to one side and turning around half way to look at Leon over his shoulder. He had pierced him with a chilly look. "That's none of your business." His tone flat and unyielding.
Maybe he had been right. It really was none of his business.
Leon sighed heavily, taking his opportunity now that Cloud was asleep again to go and find the doctor and see if a few of those test results had come back yet. He left Cloud alone and went in search of Doctor Morton.
He found the doctor hovering around the nurses' station, flipping through a file. Doctor Morton was a middle aged man, with a bald head and round glasses that sat on his roman nose. He was a little shorter than Leon but his manner was professional and sincere.
"Doctor Morton, I'd like a word with you, if I may?" Leon's tone was authoritative but polite; his work tone his father had called it.
Morton looked up from his reading and smiled at the young man, looking over the rim of his glasses as he approached.
"Certainly, I've been meaning to catch you this morning actually. Follow me please."
Morton led him into a consulting room, the simple observation bed covered in blue roll and the small clinical area unoccupied as Leon shut the door behind them.
"I wondered if any of Cloud's tests were back yet. He's awake now, which is good." Leon began, choosing a seat and sitting down, the doctor doing the same.
Morton nodded, pulling in a deep breath and bracing his hands on his knees. Leon thought he looked like he was about to reveal something very serious.
"Yes, that's good to hear." He agreed his face grave. "Has anyone had the chance to speak to you about Cloud or his injuries?" Morton's face had shifted from serious to concerned, a professional trick, mastered over years of giving bad news. Leon's heart gave a little leap.
"Nothing new really. Only what you told me last night. The general gist of things. Why?" Leon rubbed the palms of his hands on his knees, noticing they were clammy.
"All of his test results are back. His blood work is fine, there's no sepsis which is great. On your request we completed a full body mapping, this included a full body MRI scan, head, neck and chest CT, chest x-rays and full blood work up."
Leon nodded, remembering through the haze of his panic and fear from the night before when the doctors had told him what they were going to do as they wheeled Cloud away from him, his bloody, prone body getting further and further away as it disappeared through the doors of the ER.
"I would have liked to have completed a colonoscopy and/or a laparoscopy, but I need the patients consent for both of those as they are not emergency procedures."
Leon shook his head, knowing full well the chances of getting Cloud to agree to any of that were next to zero.
"He'll never agree to that. He won't even take headache tablets. The likelihood of him letting you knock him out completely is about a cat in hells chance."
Morton nodded in understanding. "All right then, we'll just have to go with what we've got." He rubbed his brow and took a few moments to organise his thoughts before levelling Leon with his unwavering sympathetic stare. "We both know Cloud has been through a major trauma."
Leon nodded.
"His MRI and chest CT, not to mention his chest x-ray showed broken ribs, and a punctured lung. From this he developed a pneumothorax which required the chest drain. This has worked very well and we are quite hopeful that his respiratory problems will be resolved quickly. However…" Morton stopped, his hesitation causing Leon's heart to flutter. He had hoped that there would be no complications from this, that Cloud's youth would mean he bounced back quickly and strongly. Maybe he wouldn't. Maybe this was all far more serious than he had thought. "I saw on his chest x-ray and more clearly on his MRI some shadowing on his lungs."
Leon's blood froze. "Shadowing?" He managed to croak out.
"At first I thought we might have been dealing with a malignancy. The dark spots are quite extensive however and I wanted a second opinion." Morton pushed his glasses back up his nose and continued. "I asked our consultant radiologist to have a look at the images and he assures me we are not dealing with any kind of malignancy."
"So it's not cancer?" Leon asked, just to make sure. Morton shook his head. "So what is it?" Leon's heart was still pounding, his blood racing in his ears despite this brief relief.
"The radiologist seems to think that it's some sort of scaring."
Leon's brow furrowed his confusion evident. "Scaring? From what?"
"He couldn't tell unfortunately. However, this type of scaring is common amongst people exposed to some different types of chemicals, maybe even asbestos. He's seen it in patients who've had polio as a child. Do you know if Cloud falls under any of these categories?"
Leon hated to admit it, but he didn't know Cloud nearly well enough to answer that question.
"I... I don't know. Maybe...no...I'm sorry." He shook his head, trying with everything in him to process this new information as quickly as possible.
"Well, it's something to think about maybe asking him, if you think he wouldn't mind?"
Leon nodded, fully intending to question Cloud about this as soon as he could.
"One more thing." The doctors voice stopping Leon in his tracks as he was about to get up and leave. "I had wanted to perform a colonoscopy to investigate the lacerations to Cloud's bowels. The MRI only showed up so much and I suspected further damage higher up."
Leon's confusion was complete now as he settled back down silently encouraging the doctor to continue. "What do you mean?"
"The MRI proved inconclusive in the sense that we just couldn't see if there was any new damage."
'New damage?" Leon asked, picking up immediately on Morton's inference.
"There was simply just too much scar tissue to see." The doctor said; his face grave. "I would hazard a guess that maybe this is not the first time Cloud has been assaulted in this manner."
In the space of just a few moments, Leon's heart was back to being lodged in his throat. He felt sick. Well and truly, god awfully, sick to his stomach. "Are you sure?" He managed to ask, pushing past the nausea and the sudden intense fear. Leon had never experienced true horror before.
"Fairly certain, yes." Morton said; his eyes full of sympathy and understanding.
"When? H...how long ago, I mean... do you... can you tell?"
Morton shook his head. "Not without that colonoscopy. And even then, I don't know if I'd be able to give a definite answer."
Leon had to swallow hard.
"Is he in any danger? Does this change anything about his prognosis?"
Morton shook his head. "No, this is just something which further exploratory tests have thrown up. His recovery will not be affected. However, I'd like to keep him in for as long as possible to keep an eye on him. Without these further tests, and these inconclusive MRI scans, it's just guess work at best. He could very well have major contusions that could rupture. On the other hand, he could be perfectly fine."
Leon nodded his head. He would keep Cloud here. He'd tie him down himself if he had to.
"Thank you, doctor." Leon said, standing and leaving the room in a manner he hoped was not too rude. Leon rushed to the visitor's bathroom, not even stopping to make sure there was no one else in the stalls before emptying the contents of his stomach into the nearest toilet.
"What do I do, Seifer?" Leon asked forlornly, his head in his hands as he sat in the main waiting room of the hospital.
In his moment of horror and fear, he had not known who to call, feeling utterly and completely lost for the first time in his adult life. His one and only true friend sat next to him, sympathy evident as he rested his hand on Leon's back and began to rub reassuring circles.
"I think if it were me, there's only one thing you can do." Seifer's deep baritone was comforting and strong and exactly what Leon needed to hear right then. The hustle and buzz of the main reception was a welcome hum in his ears as he tried to drown out the echoes of the conversation he had just had with Doctor Morton.
"Which is?" He asked, needing to be told exactly what to do. In all of his twenty five years, Leon had never needed that. He was too much like his mother in that respect, his father had told him. But now he found himself completely adrift, lost in a sea of hurt and fear. He wanted desperately to be there for Cloud. But he knew that it was more than possible that couldn't happen. Who was he to Cloud after all?
"Tell him you know. Ask him what happened." Seifer said.
Leon sat up and gave him an 'are you crazy?' look and Seifer held up his hands, his fingers spread in supplication. "Look, as far as I see it, you've nothing to lose. Tell him how you feel. Tell him you love him."
This time Leon didn't just stop with the look. "Are you crazy?" He asked.
"He can only tell you to get lost, Leon. From what I understand of the situation, that's exactly what he'd be saying any way. He might change his mind if he knew how you felt. Who knows, he might love you back."
Not many had the privilege of knowing Seifer Almasy all that well, but those who did knew about his romantic streak. Those people being him and Leon.
Leon rolled his eyes, knowing all too well that maybe this was just that very same romantic streak running away with his friend.
"You're wetter than a fishes wet bits, you know that Almasy?" Leon sighed, exasperated. Despite himself, he felt a little better. Seifer had always been able to do that for him.
"Either way, you have to go and talk to him. Whether he likes it or not, you know now. You can't hide that from him." Seifer had a point. Damn it, Seifer always had a point. Know it all bastard.
Leon nodded his face grave with foreboding but oddly determined. Once Leon made up his mind, regardless of how unsavoury that decision was, he usually carried through with it. That was one of the things Seifer loved about him - always had. That strength.
"I'll have to do it now; otherwise I might not be able to." Leon said, eyeing the main doors, a look in his eye that conveyed exactly how badly he wanted to be on the other side of them.
"Want me to wait here for you?" Seifer, always the knight in shining armour. Leon shook his head. If this went the way he thought it would, then he was going to be up there a long time.
"I'll be fine. Thanks Seifer." He gave his friend a soft smile. "Sorry I dragged you out here."
"And miss a front row seat to the whirly gig of fun that is your life?" Despite the situation, Seifer's sarcasm was appreciated.
When Leon gave a small chuckle, Seifer's amused smile faded and he was suddenly serious once again.
"You know, anyone would be lucky to have you, Leon. You're an amazing man. Don't ever forget that." Seifer, displaying a rare moment of tender sincerity, pulled his friend and one time lover into a half hug and kissed him on the temple.
Leon's heart gave an uncomfortable flutter at the compliment, but allowed his friend the gesture. He loved him too much to deny him anything.
"Call me if you need me." Seifer said; standing and leaving his friend in the clamouring, chaotic buzz of the hospital.
Leon was a mixture of surprised and fearful to find Cloud awake when he re-entered the sideward a little while later. He was surprised because the young man was sat on the edge of the bed; bare feet planted on the forest green linoleum floor, his various tubes and wires hanging off him as he fought with his tangled hospital gown. Fearful because he now had to have the conversation he had been dreading. "What the hell are you doing?" Leon demanded softly, shutting the door behind him and rushing to the bedside.
Cloud's face was grey and pallid but set in a determined grimace as he held his injured ribs, chest drain swinging from the bed, IV lines tangled around his arms. "I just want to get out of fucking bed!"
"So you can go where, exactly?" Leon asked; his annoyance and frustration over taking everything else for the moment. "You may not have noticed this Cloud, but you're in the middle of the ICU with a tube sticking out of your god damned lungs. Where exactly are you gonna go?"
Cloud reached forward, his hands trembling with the effort and he tried to steady himself against his locker, making an attempt to stand on his wobbly legs. He stumbled before he had even really tested his full weight; falling back against the bed and into Leon's arms.
"Cloud! For fuck sake, just stop will you?" Leon was almost shouting now. He didn't want to, but if he had to, he'd wrestle that man back into that bed and sit on him until he stopped fighting. He didn't have to. Cloud sat still, panting with his obvious exhaustion, small beads of perspiration standing out along his brow and upper lip. His eyes were closed, his brow crinkled in pain.
"I... I just..." he tried, not able to talk past his discomfort and breathlessness.
A few more long moments passed as he settled and tried to get his breath back. "I just wanted a shower. I still have blood on me." He finally managed voice strained and weary from agony. Leon sighed wearily too. He didn't know exactly how long it had been since Cloud had last seen the inside of a shower, but he had to guess it had been well over a week.
"Maybe we can get a nurse to help you or something then." He suggested; his voice much softer now. He heard Cloud sigh heavily, his shoulders going lax as he seemed to give in to something.
"Just forget it; I shouldn't even be here anyway. I can't believe you bought me to a hospital when you know I can't afford to pay for any of this. What am I going to do now, huh?" Cloud's pained words were punctuated by his harsh, ragged breathing. Although his manner was that of someone worn out and exhausted, Leon knew full well how quickly Cloud could turn, if he had to.
"I told you not to worry about that. I'm taking care of it." Leon replied, just as exasperated with the constant battling. This was not going at all the way he had wanted it to.
"Huh, yeah I forgot. You just turn up and wave your cash about and all your problems go away." Cloud's snide tone kicked Leon in the gut. He had to remind himself that Cloud was in pain and that people said hurtful things when they were in pain.
"That's not true Cloud. I've never treated you like that." Leon was telling the truth - to some extent anyway. He always made it a point to try and be as discreet as he possibly could when it came to money. It helped him live the kind of life he preferred.
"No? That nurse told me who was paying for my treatment. She also told me exactly how much that was. And let's not forget you paid nearly six thousand munnies to Don Corneo for my release. So don't try and tell me you don't just throw your money at problems to make them go away." The venom in Cloud's tone was undeniable and it made Leon wonder if now was such a good time to be doing any of this. Maybe he should just let Cloud go?
"The nurse told me your name." Cloud added, looking up at the tall brunette through angry, guarded eyes.
They had known each other a grand total of three months and in that time Leon had come to fall in love with a man who was so guarded and hostile, so secretive and prickly that he wondered if it was really love at all. Could you fall in love with someone you didn't really know? And in all that time, Leon had never lied to Cloud. Agreed, they had some unspoken ground rules that neither of them had broken; for one, Leon was never to ask about Cloud's personal history, meetings were solely for the purpose of fucking. And Cloud never once asked Leon anything about himself. Not even his last name. Not even his real first name. Leon had always been Leon to him. He hadn't needed to know anything else about him.
"So who are you really?" Cloud asked; his tone hot and prickly. It wasn't even like he really had a right to be this pissed off. This had been their agreement. Leon had kept his side of the bargain.
"I thought the nurse told you." Leon replied, stepping away from the blond and turning to pick up his discarded suit jacket. He had a feeling he would be leaving soon.
"I want to hear it from you." Cloud had a tone about him that implied he would be displeased with the answer no matter what it was. Leon figured he truly had nothing else to loose. He sighed again. This was it, no more putting it off.
"My name is Squall Leonhart. People call me Leon because I ask them to. I hate people recognising me." He explained turning to look at Cloud who sat looking at him like he hated him. Truly, Leon had no idea why Cloud should be so angry with him. He was only trying to help after all. Was money really such an issue?
"Squall Leonhart? As in Loire & Leonhart Enterprises?" Cloud asked, knowing the answer anyway. Leon nodded.
"As in Loire & Leonhart Enterprises, the multibillion munnies mergers corporation?" Another nod from the suddenly silent brunette. He hated it when people spelled his wealth out to him. He often wondered how other people felt, knowing they were stood in the same room as a billionaire. If it was anything like Leon felt, then it was slightly embarrassed. His money had always made him uncomfortable.
"My father and I own the business. I never wanted to make a big deal out of it, Cloud." Leon said honestly when Cloud had been silent for a little bit too long. Truth be told, the young man looked like he was going to throw up or pass out. Of the two options, Leon hoped for the latter.
"All this time..." Cloud said vaguely, his memory turned far inwards thinking of all the times they had been together and Cloud hadn't known. Hadn't known he was fucking a billionaire. "That's why it wasn't a problem paying Don Corneo's money. That's why it isn't a problem paying for all this." Cloud observed, waving his hand about. "Fuck! You could probably build yourself a hospital if you wanted to."
"What was I supposed to do, Cloud? Leave you with Don Corneo?" Leon asked, taking a step towards the young man, finally sick of feeling ashamed for trying to help. For wanting to help!
"There was no way in hell I was going to leave you there with those men another second longer than I had to. And as for 'all this'?" He said, mocking Cloud's tone, waving his hand about "you think I give a shit if you're too proud to accept my help? You would have died, Cloud! You think I was going to let that happen because I didn't want to offend your sensibilities with my money? Fuck you!" Leon's chest was heaving with pent up emotion and he realised he was shouting but he didn't care. He was too tired and too wrung out and too frightened to care. This ended today. One way or another.
"You've got some nerve preaching to me about secrets and lies. I never lied to you, Cloud. You never asked me who I was. I would have told you." Leon's voice was low and deadly now. He was getting to the heart of his problem. "But you! Who are you, Cloud? Where do you come from? What are those scars on your back, huh? I asked you about them and you told me to fuck off! Don't you think that before you start throwing around accusations like that, you should take a good long look in the mirror?"
Cloud's eyes had cut away to stare hard unforgiving daggers at the floor. Leon knew he had him. He couldn't wriggle out of that one.
"Well, Cloud?" Leon needled him "are you finally going to be honest with me?"
There was an intense silence that followed, filled with harsh angry breathing from Leon as he desperately tried to calm himself. Cloud sat as still as an ice statue, his face cold and impassive, dark and thunderous.
"Why should I tell you anything?" He asked slowly and full of malice. Leon felt that in that moment, Cloud truly hated him, and he had never felt more heart broken. How could he have thought this would have a happy ending? How could he have thought Cloud could ever return his feelings? He was a fool. A fool with nothing to lose.
"Because I love you, you fucking idiot!" Leon admitted slowly, all his heartache and pain vocalised in this one admission.
Cloud looked up at him then, whatever he had been about to say clearly forgotten. His eyes held nothing but shock and Leon could tell he was fighting with anger and disbelief.
"What?" Cloud managed to mouth, eyebrows crinkling in confusion. "What did you just say?"
Leon looked away to the window, never more embarrassed and uncomfortable as he was at that exact moment. Why did Cloud have to make him say it again?
"I said, because I love you, you fucking idiot!" Leon's voice was strained and tight with anger and awkwardness. It had been such a long and emotional night. And now this - this rejection. "You have no idea how hard it's been for me to sit and watch you and be close to you and know nothing about you. I know what those men did to you!" Leon looked at Cloud whose face had moved to thunderous rage. "I've been so fucking worried about you, Cloud. I thought you were going to die!"
Leon's breath hitched and he had to stop, unable to carry on talking after vocalising such an agonising thought. He turned away from the blond on the bed, not wanting to stay a moment longer and hear Cloud reject him. It was written all over the young man's face. He moved across the room towards the door.
"So you think you can just barge in here and start ordering me about and telling me what to do like you're still paying me?" Cloud asked coolly.
Leon knew Cloud was twisting this. He'd just told him he loved him for fuck sake. As if any of this had to do with money any more.
"You know damned well that's not what's going on here. I don't own you, Cloud. I've never told you what to do!"
"Too fucking right you don't own me!" Cloud shouted back, anger was such a convenient cover for the fear and uncertainty that Leon's words had caused in him.
"No, I love you, Cloud. Fuck knows why, but I do. And I know that this isn't the best situation to be in; that I've got no right to demand anything from you..."
"No, you don't." Cloud yelled, trying to stand once again. "You don't have the right to demand anything. You pay me to have sex with you. That's all, Leon. Who the fuck do you think you are? I don't give a shit how much money you've got, that doesn't mean you can stand there and ask about my life, my childhood. What fucking business is it of yours who beat me or who fucked me?"
Leon's intense, angry gaze met Cloud's blazing face as they locked eyes across the room, before Cloud had realised that he had let something slip, Leon saw a hint of the truth written there.
"Who beat you? Who fucked you?" Leon asked, watching as Cloud realised he had said too much.
"That's none of your business." Cloud growled, steadying himself with the locker as he wobbled slightly, physically thrown off guard.
"I'm getting tired of hearing that bullshit, Cloud. I don't care if you don't think it's my business. I want to know!" Leon was tired. He was tired of putting himself out there and getting knocked back, tired of being avoided and out right lied to and tired of feeling like he wasn't good enough. He didn't care if he had a right any more. Cloud owed him some sort of an explanation.
"What part of 'it's none of your business' don't you understand? Why do you want to know this shit for anyway? Why is it important for you to know about some guy my fucking drunk of a mother brought home?" Beneath Cloud's obvious rage, his face had begun to pale. Either from the exhaustion of standing or from fighting, Leon didn't know. Probably both.
"Is that who did that to you?" Leon asked, nodding his head, gesturing to Cloud's back.
There was a deep and intense silence from the blond as he regarded Leon from across the room. Leon had no idea what was going on in his head.
"Is that who hurt you? Some guy your mom brought home?" Leon asked again, determined not to let this go.
At his words, Cloud seemed to deflate, his anger fizzling away as he let himself stumble back to sit on the bed. "You make it sound so fucking clichéd." The blond mumbled; initial anger all but gone, though his bitterness remained.
Leon's anger was subsiding too; he was getting closer to the truth now. Any moment, he was sure Cloud would open up.
"Tell me, please Cloud." He begged, taking a step closer.
"What is there to say, Leon?" Cloud sounded so defeated now, such a contrast from his earlier rage.
"How about the truth?" Leon asked, not truly angry now, just tired and emotional and drained of everything. He moved back into the room, inching closer to the bed.
"The truth?" Cloud asked; his tone low and bitter. "You want to know the truth? Which part first?" Cloud unconsciously rubbed his good hand up and down his arm, an attempt to sooth himself. "The part where he was devious enough to wait until my mom had passed out from drinking or the part where after my mom died, he didn't have to sneak around anymore and he could just fuck me whenever he wanted?"
Leon froze, his worst assumptions coming true right before him. Really, what had he expected? The admission made Leon weak at the knees and he sat heavily in the chair by the bed, all strength gone from his legs.
"I couldn't... I couldn't stop him." Cloud's voice, his whole demeanour had shrunk. "I had... to find a way to...to live with it." Cloud's voice had become small and emotionless, though a tiny tremor was still evident; his eyes dry as they stared unseeing ahead, looking deep into his past. "I provoked him. I thought if I made him mad, it meant that I deserved it. I... I could live with that." Cloud nodded to himself, as if to affirm to himself that he had done what he had to survive, a cold comfort now.
A tear slipped from Leon's eye, silently, so as not to interrupt.
"He used his belt a lot... locked me in the bathroom..." Leon could see Cloud's fractured mind falling over the pieces of memories. Fragments of pain. Memories that Leon had forced out of him.
"He'd make me stand over a bucket of bleach... breathe in the fumes until I passed out. Sometimes... I'd have to drink it if I didn't pass out quick enough."
Leon had a sudden and clear recollection of the conversation he'd had with Doctor Morton, suggestions of chemicals and mentions of scarred lungs. Too much scar tissue, Morton had said. No fucking shit, oh holy fucking Hyne!
"I... I put up with it as long as I could, but I..." there was a long and hollow silence as Leon wondered if Cloud would continue or if he should say anything. What would he say?
"I came to Hollow Bastion thinking I could start again - pretend like none of it had happened. I was so stupid." Cloud shook his head slowly, bitterness and regret evident in the way his shoulders drooped. "I started turning tricks about six months after I got here."
Leon scrubbed at his eyes, they were red and puffy and uncomfortable; his face tight from the salty tears.
"And here I am - a complete and utter fucking waster. Pathetic." Cloud turned his haunted eyes on Leon and the older man wished he hadn't. "You shouldn't love me, Leon."
There was silence for the longest time. Leon could neither find the words to explain his horror and sadness, nor find the energy to express them. Why had he wanted to know so badly?
Cloud sat silent and motionless, his confession had sucked the last of everything from him. He sat and waited for Leon to leave him.
After what felt like hours of torture and silent judgement, Cloud finally felt Leon's gaze come to rest on him. He couldn't look him in the eye.
Out of the corner of his peripheral vision, he saw the older man's hand reach for his arm, tugging at his broken wrist. The cast on it prevented Leon from holding the hand properly, but he grasped the fingers anyway.
"Cloud, look at me." Leon demanded softly.
Tentatively, his gaze filled with shame and self-loathing, Cloud turned to Leon.
The older man looked at him, his watery grey eyes intense and searching. They were filled with something that Cloud couldn't place. Maybe it was because the only thing he expected to find in that look was disgust?
Leon stood, his tall frame towering over the blond on the bed and he moved a little closer, placing himself directly in front of Cloud. He let go of the younger man's hand and instead cupped his cheek, tilting his chin until the angle of his face was pointed up towards him and Cloud was looking at him. Leon brought his other hand up, stroking the other side of the blonde's face, framing it between his ever so slightly trembling hands. He gently traced the high cheek bones and strong jaw and saw apprehension in Cloud's beautiful eyes.
"I can't make what happened disappear." He finally whispered his voice husky and quiet. "I can't make all that go away. No matter how much money I have." He said being careful to avoid the bruises and the cuts as he reverently held Cloud's face. "I just want you. And I promise…" he swallowed, fighting down the huge swell of emotion that had erupted in his chest "if you let me, I'll look after you. And I promise I'll never, ever hurt you. And I'll never let anyone else hurt you. Ever again." He added, thumbing a bruise on Cloud's jaw. "This doesn't change anything, Cloud. I still love you."
Cloud's almost emotionless mask crumbled at these last uttered words and he had to look away. He looked down and held his tired, beaten and ashamed face in his one good hand and cried.
Leon sat behind his desk, the lamp throwing a warm light over the few papers and documents scattered in front of him, his computer was off, it was late at night and he sat, deep in thought.
He had left Cloud at the hospital only a short while ago, pleading with him to finally get some sleep. It had been a long and tiring day.
Leon looked at the picture on his desk. It was an old one, but it had sat there for the best part of five years. His mother smiled out at him. It had been taken long before her cancer had taken her and Leon thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He remembered bits about her, but that's all they seemed to be these days; just bits and pieces, fragments of a childhood that couldn't have been more privileged or perfect. A far cry from Cloud's childhood.
When his mother had died, Leon had felt like the world was so unfair. He felt cheated. He had spent so long being angry with everyone, especially his father. How could he have been so myopic?
His life, the death of his mother not-withstanding, had been so completely charmed. There was nothing he had ever wanted for, then or now. He was a fucking billionaire for crying out loud! How could he sit and complain about his life when Cloud had lived through his?
They had both lost their mother, which was something he could relate to, but that was where the similarities ended.
Leon felt the now familiar stirrings of outrage and horror as he recalled his conversations with Cloud from earlier in the day.
He had helped the exhausted younger man back into bed, straightening his hospital gown and bed sheets, making sure all the wires and tubes were out of the way. He had climbed up next to the blond, threading his fingers through Cloud's good hand that rested on his stomach. Leon's head propped up on his left hand so that he could see Cloud, could watch his face.
"It's why you don't drink, isn't it?" He had asked, squeezing ever so slightly on his fingers. "It's why you won't even take pain killers." Cloud didn't really need to answer. His tired face was turned toward the window, his eyes heavy and hooded.
"I was the one who found her." He had whispered; his voice scratchy from crying. "I got home from school. She was just there, lying on the floor. Dead."
Leon's heart gave another uncomfortable twist. Just another in a long line of heart rending moments that was turning into a day from hell.
"It was the drinking. I know it was. No one ever told me exactly what happened, but I knew. And I swore to myself I'd never drink. I never take anything." Cloud's speech had begun to slur from tiredness, his eyes drooping every now and again as he continued to gaze out of the window.
Leon lay next to him and watched him. Content with the quietness and the peace. After a while, a thought occurred to him.
"What were you doing getting mixed up with Don Corneo if you have nothing to do with drugs?" He had asked softly.
Cloud turned to look at Leon, his gaze tired and lacking any fire.
"Roxas." He replied simply. "He owed them money. When they came looking for him I told them I didn't know where he was." Cloud explained; the where-abouts of his roommate still unknown.
"They took me instead. Ransacked the apartment and found my money. They said it wasn't enough and they were gonna keep hold of me until Roxas showed up or I came up with more money."
Leon's brow had furrowed, his hand that had been laced in-between Cloud's fingers came up to cup Cloud's jaw. He reached down and planted a soft kiss to the blonde's forehead.
"It took me so long to save that money. They just took it!" Cloud had exclaimed, obviously anguished. "All my life, people have been fucking me over. That money was mine. It made it all worth it." Cloud's face had been a mixture of pain and murder "I was going to get my own place. Maybe go back to school." He finished, turning his face into the crook of Leon's neck, completely despaired.
"What made you call me?" Leon asked, wondering not for the first time what had made the blond think of him when the gangsters had given him one phone call - one phone call to beg for more money. Cloud hadn't used that call to ask for money, of course. He had rung Leon, begging him to find Roxas and keep him safe.
"You were the only other person I trusted." was Cloud's simple reply. He couldn't have known at the time that Leon would have tracked him down and bargained with Corneo. He couldn't have known that Leon would have paid all that money. He never expected Leon to do any of that for him. Cloud had fully expected to die. Held there in that rundown motel, waiting for the men who held him to get tired of him and finally slit his throat. Just one more dead hooker.
Cloud had fallen asleep not long after that. Leon had promised him he would be back by morning. He had some things to do first, but he would stay with him until he fell asleep.
Leon picked up the phone and cradled the receiver against his ear, dialling a number he knew well. He waited a couple of rings before the other person picked up.
"Hello?" A sleepy voice asked on the other end.
"Laguna?" Leon asked, already knowing it would be his father.
"Squall? What are you calling for at this hour?"
Leon looked at the digital clock on his desk. It was only just after midnight. Not late by Leon's standards.
"I need a favour." He cut to the chase. He and his father had never really minced words. Their relationship a lot better nowadays than it had been when Leon was a moody, sulking teenager. "I need that number." He said cryptically.
"Number?" Laguna asked, clearly puzzled.
"We have people, don't we?" Leon said it more like a statement than a question. "People who can sort things. People who we're not supposed to know about. Who I'm not supposed to know about."
Leon knew damned well that you didn't become head of a multibillion munnie mergers and acquisitions company without getting your hands dirty. He knew Laguna had people that would take care of whatever he needed them to. Discretion guaranteed.
"What's this about, son?" Laguna asked, sleep forgotten, his tone clearly alert and concerned.
"I just... I need that number. I can't tell you what it's about. I'm sorry dad." Leon hardly ever called his father that, maybe it might help, he thought.
"Squall, if you're in trouble..."
"I'm not, I promise. I just need something sorting. Please, dad." He knew he'd won by the silence on the other end of the phone.
"Fine, just promise me that whatever this is, it won't come back on you." Laguna, although a goofy and difficult man to live with, knew when to keep his nose out. It was one of the reasons they could get along so well these days. A hard learned lesson for Laguna though. Leon hadn't made it easy on him growing up.
"I promise. Thanks dad." That was three times in under a minute. If he wasn't careful, Leon was going to make a habit of this!
Hanging up, Leon waited a few moments, before dialling again. After two rings the dial tone stopped and a male voice answered. "Hello?"
Leon let out the breath he hadn't even realised he was holding and replied.
"I need something sorting."
~&~Epilogue~&~
"For Hyne's sake, Leon. I'm not made of glass, I won't break you know." Cloud's voice was hushed but stern. He was trying to be quiet, but his annoyance was getting the better of him.
They had travelled to Fisherman's Horizon, where Leon's sister, Ellone and her husband had a very large, very expensive looking summer house right on the harbour. It had been a strange but not uncomfortable drive. Meeting Leon's family should have been one of the most stressful and nerve-wracking moments in Cloud's life. However, as it turned out, Ellone had a knack for making people feel right at home. Her two kids helped.
"Here, you take her. I'm no good with them." Leon had said to him as he passed a small baby into Cloud's arms, the look of shock and unbridled fear on Cloud's face not unnoticed by Leon. He had not time to refuse however, as Leon walked off, following his sister out onto the terrace as she had shown them around her newly refurbished mansion. Cloud followed closely behind, hoping to catch Leon's eye, Ellone's eye, anyone's eye, so he could give the quietly fussing kid in his arms back over to someone. No such luck. It had been a good fifteen minutes, traipsing round the extensive gardens and patios, back up to the house and through the elaborate halls and wood decked dining rooms (two of them) before Cloud noticed he had another tag along. He had looked down to see a small girl, thumb wedged into her mouth, hiding behind the material of his cargo pants. She had looked up at him, eyes huge and round and completely unquestioning in the way only children can do, the spitting image of her mother.
"Hi." Cloud had said, not quite sure what the protocol was for introducing oneself to a three year old. He needn't have worried. She giggled and smiled a gappy, toothy grin around her thumb and continued to swing on his trouser leg. Introductions made, they had carried on the grand tour.
After dinner and talk of business and family and backstories and the latest news had been put aside, they had all sat out on the patio and watched the sun set over the water. All in all it had been quite a lovely day, and Cloud had breathed a sigh of relief that it had gone so well. It was all quite a change from a month ago.
It had taken all of Leon's powers of persuasion to convince Cloud to move in with him. But Cloud couldn't deny that the move had been the best thing for him. He couldn't remember the last time he had been so happy. Had he ever been this happy?
It hadn't all been plain sailing of course. There had been that thing with the money.
Leon had walked in, the morning after that day when Cloud had told him everything, and placed a worn brown paper bag into Cloud's lap. The blond had stared at him dumbfounded, his mind still not clear from sleep and pain and the tumultuous emotions that had been roiling in his head.
"What's this?" he had asked.
"Open it and see." Leon had replied cryptically, sitting himself on the edge of the bed, daring the wrath of the nurse who had told him off the night before for lying next to Cloud.
Cloud had un-wrapped the package and reached inside, pulling out a stack of crinkled bills and notes - his money. His money that Don Corneo's men had taken from him. He recognised the black mark he had put in each corner of the bills.
"Where did you get this?" Cloud had asked incredulously after a long moment's hesitation.
"Does it matter? I got it back for you. You said that was yours and that it meant something. That money made everything you've been through worth it." Leon had said, taking the bundle and turning it over. It was so small. "I could have just replaced it. I could have given you my money. But it wouldn't have been the same. I didn't want all your pain and suffering to have been in vain, Cloud."
"But how?" Cloud had asked, still not able to take it in.
"That's not important." Leon had replied, and no matter how much Cloud had screamed and yelled and sulked and begged, Leon had never told him. Cloud would never know how Leon had called an anonymous person late at night. And Cloud would never know that Don Corneo was dead. Dead along with his disgusting, vile, pathetic excuse for human beings, mob of murderers and rapists!
One month later, Cloud lay beneath Leon as they made love for the first time since all of this had begun. No money had exchanged hands; they had both come to this willingly and Leon had wanted to make it last.
"I know you won't break. I'm trying to be romantic, dumbass." Leon snapped back.
Cloud snorted at the insult and wrapped his arms around his lover. His lover he thought. He had never had one of those before. He inhaled deeply and pressed his face into Leon's neck.
"Well, be quiet then. You don't want to wake your sister do you?" Cloud rolled his hips, knowing Leon would have a hard time keeping in the groan that always happened when Cloud moved like that.
"Fucking tease." Leon muttered into Cloud's shoulder as he bit down softly.
The French doors were flung wide open, letting in the warm summer night air and the gentle sound of the ocean. His sister's house was so big, Leon had no doubt that they could swing from the actual chandelier that was in the centre of their ridiculously large bedroom, and still no one would hear. But he humoured his partner anyhow.
"I love you." he whispered.
Leon felt the young blond hold him a little tighter, his arms around his neck clench just a little harder as Leon rocked himself into him. How had he gone so long without this?
"I love you too." Cloud replied.
~Fin~