Disclaimer: I don't own any Sonic the Hedgehog characters TT_TT'
Getting Team Dark A New Name?
Shadow the hedgehog, Rouge the bat and E-123 Omega , also known as Team Dark, were sitting comfortably in their shared office which together they had styled so it looked more like a living-room.
The reason they had an office together was because together they worked for the government organization, Guardians Units of Nations, also called GUN for short.
It was a bit hard to explain and all but in the end they ended up working for the commander who was coincidentally kind of Shadow's old childhood-rival of some sorts as they had both been close with Shadow's friend Maria when she was still alive and had from what the others had heard been both pretty competive about the girl's attention.
However, in the end when the GUN from back then came and shut down the ARK Shadow was made on Maria had been killed and their commander had blamed Shadow for it.
It was all pretty messy between them but somehow neither had killed the other yet and with it being like that Rouge and Omega were just fine but maybe that was also because they didn't know any better anymore.
But anyway!
That's enough explaining about how they got there!
They had managed to finish their latest mission pretty smoothly and after handing out the rapports had some free time but neither Shadow nor Rouge felt like going home yet and for Omega it didn't really matter as he literally lived in the office due to not really needing a real home.
At the moment the robot was sitting on their couch while playing a videogame on the TV after having taken an interest in them.
Shadow was sitting next to his teammate, watching how the little character moved around the screen while every now and then taking a sip from his coffee with his feet lazily propped onto the coffee-table and Rouge just sat in a lone chair reading a magazine.
The three sat in comfortable silence with the only sounds from the TV, the cup whenever it was sipped from and the magazine whenever a page was turned.
Suddenly there was a knock on the door.
"It's open!" Rouge called without even looking up.
The door opened and in came the commander.
"I see you have all made yourselves comfortable." he said with a raised eyebrow.
"Is there anything you need, Sir?" Shadow asked, already getting annoyed with the man.
If the commander cared at all about the hedgehog's attitude he certainly didn't show it.
"Yes, I do in fact need you to do something." he simply said.
"Which is…?" Shadow sighed.
"Change your team's name."
"Huh?!" all members cried out in surprise.
Sure, they've been given a lot of weird orders but this was just plain confusing.
"What's wrong with 'Team Dark'?" Rouge asked.
"People have been complaining. They say it sounds scary and because of that they are also scared of you guys."
"So what? Keeps the crazy 'I'm-gonna-kidnap-you-and-hold-you-as-my-personal-prisoner-for-all-eternity'-fans away." Rouge shrugged with Shadow nodding in agreement.
He's lost count of how many times that had already happened to himself and also to Rouge and all their other heroic friends.
Heck, he had even needed to save Omega a few times from the same girl who claimed they would have techno-organic babies!
But he really didn't want to think about any of those traumatizing moments in his life so he decided to just focus back on the topic at hand.
"I myself would also like to know why something as minor a few meatbags fearing us would be important enough to take action against it." Omega spoke up.
"I don't need to explain everything to you! Just get yourselves a new name!" the commander yelled after having grown impatient.
"I'll be back in about an hour!" and without waiting for another respond he slammed the door shut, leaving his team alone.
"Sooo… Any ideas?" Rouge awkwardly asked.
"Nope. I've got nothing." Shadow sighed.
"I was not programmed for creativity. I am trying to think of a new name for us but I am currently unsuccessful." Omega said.
"Geez, where would you guys even be without me?!" Rouge asked as she slapped her forehead but teasing amusement was heard in her voice.
"If you know something then spit it out already!" Shadow snapped, not in the mood for the bat's attitude.
"Team Ultimate! Duh!" Rouge stuck her tongue out and crossed her eyes as if you had to be a completely and utter moron if you didn't understand.
"Team Ultimate?" Shadow raised an eyebrow, ignoring the glare send his way.
Rouge rolled her eyes and heaved an exaggerated sigh before deciding to explain herself.
"Well, you Shadow, are also known as the Ultimate Lifeform, right?" the hedgehog nodded.
"And Omega, you are the Ultimate Robot." the robot nodded too.
"Well that explains why we should be called 'Team Ultimate'!"
"I understand your reasoning when you mention the aliases of myself and Shadow but for the name to fit all of us, should you yourself not be known as a type of 'Ultimate'?" Omega asked.
"Of course I thought of that!" Rouge answered, chin raised and hands on the hips proudly.
"She is a lot of 'Ultimates'! Ultimate annoyance, ultimate thief, ultimate flirt, ultimate headache-giver, ultimate rapi-" Shadow started listing off but stopped to duck from the flying boot that was aimed for his head.
"Shut up, Blacky!" Rouge yelled angrily.
"Blacky?! Sheesh, you're getting more and more creative, aren't you?!"
"At least I got creativity! Unlike a certain motherfu-"
Omega vented and decided to just turn them off and focus back in his game, waiting for his friends to cool down.
After a while however he knew it was enough.
Sure, he was more then used to hearing his teammates bantering about the most ridiculous things but they didn't have time for this now!
"Rouge! Would you please tell us what type of 'Ultimate' you are?!" he yelled over the arguing, successfully shutting the other two up.
"Oh yeah! I almost forgot!" Rouge chirped happily, as if she hadn't been about to try to kill Shadow just seconds again.
"Just tell us…" Shadow sighed as he rolled his eyes.
"I am… The Ultimate Cutie!" Rouge yelled while striking a pose.
Shadow just groaned and took another sip from his coffee.
"If we would wish to have the 'Ultimate Cutie' as you say on our team then we would have to replace you with Cream the rabbit." Omega said plainly.
The coffee went spraying back into the cup and Shadow had to fight to keep himself from bursting out laughing upon seeing Rouge's shocked face.
"Well, the kid is adorable!" he couldn't help but pipe up, catching the apple that was this time thrown at him.
"Thank you very much! I'm pretty hungry anyway!" he teased before taking a nice bite out of the fruit, chuckled as that seemed to tick the bat off even more.
"Perhaps we should try to move on and think of another suitable name for us!" Omega suggested before another fight could break out.
"How about 'Team Suave' then? We are then best-looking guy, girl and robot out there, aren't we?" Rouge winked at him.
"And have people coming over just to check if we're really that hot and then end up maybe falling for us and joining the fanclubs? No thanks." Shadow shuddered because as said earlier in the story, they already had enough trouble with the admirers they had now.
They were quiet for a few moments, deep in thought.
"What would the two of you think of 'Team Destruction'?" Omega suddenly suggested.
Shadow made a face at that.
"You're the only one who actually likes breaking stuff." he said.
"And that sounds way creepier then our name now." Rouge added.
"Team Chaos?" Shadow gave it his own try.
"Too focused on just you."
"I believe we are running out of options."
"Tell me about it! The only other few names I can come up with are all things that'll have me running from angry mothers of six year old for the rest of my life!" Shadow groaned.
"Why would the mothers of young children chase you? " Omega asked, not understanding.
"Because the words involving the names would end up corrupting the minds of the kids and destroy their innocence." Shadow explained.
"What is wrong with your life?" Rouge asked.
"Well, I wake up every Tuesday and Friday to find myself getting sexually harassed by you, for starters."
"Hey, it's not my fault you've got such a nice ass!"
"Can't you just focus on the damn echidna all the time?"
"It's a draw between you and Knuckie so I need to divide my attention! Wednesday and Saterday are all about him and the rest of the week it's either time for myself or just whoever is lucky enough to be close!"
"And you ask me and what's wrong with me?!"
"Awww! Don't be like that! Why don't you let me give you a nice massage~?"
"Gah! Get away from me, you pervert! Hey! Don't touch me there! Omega, help me!"
Omega awkwardly sat there as Shadow used him as a shield against Rouge who's hands had suddenly become very grabby.
"THAT IS ENOUGH! ALL OF YOU KNOCK IT OFF RIGHT NOW!" a voice suddenly boomed, making everyone freeze.
In the entrance stood their commander, glaring at them like they were Eggman.
"What the hell are you three thinking?! I tell you to get yourselves a new name and you end up groping each other! And Shadow, I don't even want to know what kind of names you came up with if it would get mothers angry at you!" the man continued to yell.
"Wait a minute! How do you know about that?" Shadow asked in surprise and the human froze up, realizing his slip-up.
"Were you spying on us?!" Rouge yelled while looking around the room until she actually found a hidden camera between the leaves of a plant they had gotten from said commander.
"If you're spying on the office you might have cameras hidden in the shower here too!" the bat concluded as her normally white head started to turn completely red in anger.
"Omega! Go surge the shower while I have a talk with our beloved commander!" she ordered the robot who didn't hesitate to stand up do as she said.
"Wait up, Omega! I'll help!" Shadow yelled as he stumbled after the robot.
"I am not in need of assistance while searching for hidden cameras. My scanners should be able to pick them up." Omega said calmly, though there was curiosity in his voice on why the hedgehog wanted to come with him.
"Yeah, I know but I just don't want to be there while Rouge is killing our boss." Shadow said, also right away explaining his reason for coming along when suddenly familiar screams could be heard coming from the office.
"And how about after we finish you and I go out for a nice and looong walk?"
"I believe that would be the best for everyone."
They stayed away for the rest of the day with Omega even spending the night at Shadow's house to avoid having to go back to the office.
In the end Team Dark decided to just stick with their original name because trying to come up with a new one was just too much of a bother and Rouge forced the commander to take down all the secret cameras that were in places secret cameras weren't supposed to be.
The End
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